Fighting Dreamers
by KungFuu
Summary: Iruka would do anything for his adopted son. He'd even resort to prostitution if it would allow him to pay for Naruto to become a ninja, his son's only dream. Iruka's night job brings Kakashi into his life, and everything changes. AU
1. Old Life

Fighting Dreamers By: KungFuu 

**Warnings**: Implied! prostitution, sex, non-con

**Disclaimer**: Don't own it.

**Summary**: When Iruka finds Naruto abandoned, he has to take him in. He wants to give Naruto a fighting chance at success in life. That means enrolling him in Ninja Academy, but the cost to enroll is high. Iruka pays with the only thing he has – his body. And Kakashi? He ends up falling in love with a prostitute. AU, Yaoi

Chapter 1 

"_The Old Life"_

Iruka took a moment to simply appreciate the aesthetic beauty of his newest client lying beside him. They'd just finished up, and the sex had almost been enjoyable for once. The silver haired man had been concerned for Iruka's own pleasure, and he'd asked him not to fake pleasure he didn't feel. It had been a nice break from what he usually had to deal with.

The mysterious ninja had only one eye revealed, and he narrowed it in Iruka's direction thoughtfully. Iruka looked up at him with a small, fake smile.

"Do you do this sort of thing all the time?" he asked in a monotone voice.

"It puts food on the table," he replied in casual dismissal. The client's eye relaxed into a lazy stare. He seemed to simply want to study him. That was fine with Iruka, as being stared at was a lot easier on his ass than taking another rough pounding like the one he'd just received.

"There are other jobs that would put food on the table," the client commented, as if not really interested at all. Iruka began to feel a little irritated. His regular clients were never so chatty.

"Well, those jobs don't pay as well, and there are other expenses to consider. Do you really want to talk about this when I could be giving you a massage?" Iruka asked, hoping to distract the curious man. For another long moment the man was silent as death, and then he rolled to his side and stood abruptly.

"I'm done with you," he announced, as if more to himself than to Iruka. The brunette stood as well and fetched a damp washcloth. His client waited patiently, his perfectly proportioned, pale body looking like some ancient statue made of white marble. Iruka always could tell when a client was a ninja by the way that their bodies were built. He didn't get them often.

He returned with the cloth and sank onto his knees, rubbing the warm rag up and down the man's upper thighs to wash off the mess and then gently washing his limp cock. When he was done cleaning, he remained on his knees between the man's long legs, cheek nestled against his inner thigh.

Then he told him his price, and placed a small, chaste kiss to the man's leg.

"That's expensive," the man replied, staring down at him with that same contemplative, relaxed gaze. Iruka shrugged and stood, trailing his fingers over the man's nude front as he did so.

"You think I'm not worth it?" he asked, tilting his head to the side coquettishly. The silver haired man's eye narrowed and his lips shifted under his mask.

"You were worth it. Get me my clothes," he ordered. Iruka smiled, relieved the man wasn't going to argue about his price, and fetched the garments for him. The man dressed quickly and tossed the bills onto the bed. Without another word, he was gone.

Iruka deflated like a popped balloon the second he left. Another miserable, hellish night was over. He could finally get back home. Dragging up the last bit of his strength, Iruka waddled into the inn's tiny bathroom and turned on the shower. He waited until the water was hot enough to relax his muscles and stepped inside, scrubbing himself down with the complimentary soap so that his son, Naruto, wouldn't smell some strange man on him. When he was done cleaning off, he toweled himself dry and slipped into his spare set of clothing. He tied back his long, brown hair and returned to the bedroom to pick up the money. When he had collected all his belongings, he left the room and locked it. Because the innkeeper was a client of his, he was allowed to keep the room for whenever he needed it free of charge, as long as the owner got a significant discount.

He would clean the room up later – he was too exhausted to do it just then.

He made his way home as quickly as he could, hurrying through the dark, dangerous streets until the grungy apartment building that he called home loomed in front of him. Knowing the front doors would be locked at such a late hour, he took to the fire escape – wincing with every rung. It had been a long, physically demanding night.

Finally, he reached the second story and rapped his knuckles gently against the glass. It took a few moments, but eventually a small boy appeared on the other side of the window and unlocked it. Iruka pushed it open and climbed inside, re-locking the window behind him.

His small, adopted son hugged him tightly around his legs.

"You're early, Daddy!" Naruto said. Iruka smiled, feeling like all the negative feelings he'd been carrying around all evening just drained away. He lifted Naruto with protesting arms and carried the boy into the living room. The small radio was on and some paper was scattered over the floor along with a rainbow of stubby crayons.

"Did everything go okay while I was out?" Iruka asked. He hated that he had to leave the small boy alone in the apartment in the evenings, but it was really the only way. Soon things would change – they just had to survive a little longer.

"Of course I was okay! I'm tough, remember?" Naruto asked as Iruka set him down on the rickety kitchen table. The boy was about eight-years-old – short for his age and angelic in appearance. Iruka had found him wandering the streets one night when he was around five years old, helpless and abandoned. An orphan himself, Iruka had taken him in. Iruka knew first hand what life was like at the orphanage, and couldn't send another child there to suffer. He saw in Naruto a chance to do something that no one ever done for him – he saw a chance to make his life really worth something by loving and raising Naruto.

"I know you're tough, but there are people out there who are tougher than you right now, and I worry," Iruka replied. It was a familiar conversation. Iruka opened the pantry and frowned at the paltry contents. "All we have is ramen again. I haven't been able to get to the store," Iruka said sheepishly. The real reason was lack of money. Still, Naruto beamed.

"That's okay, it's my favorite!"

"I know, but it isn't very healthy," Iruka replied. Naruto stuck his tongue out. Iruka sighed and began to prepare the ramen for dinner. It was late, but the two of them were accustomed to the schedule. They slept late in the mornings, usually until about noon. When they both woke up, Iruka had a few hours to spend with Naruto, often times running errands or taking Naruto to the library. Then, when it started to get dark, they went home and ate. Iruka made sure Naruto was safely locked inside the apartment with something to occupy him, usually a cheap toy, a puzzle, or some art supplies, and then he would go to the inn where his clients would come 'visit' him.

In this way, he had saved enough money over the past year to make Naruto's dream a reality. He finally had enough to pay for the boy to attend the Ninja Academy in Konoha.

The noodles softened in the boiling water and Iruka drained them. He added seasonings that both he and Naruto liked and brought the cheap meal to the table in disposable bowls. As was tradition, Iruka stopped Naruto from gulping it down immediately.

"Naruto, you know we say a few words before dinner." The blonde boy sighed, as he did every night, and tilted his head as a sign he was waiting. Iruka smiled at him tiredly and stared down at the lump of noodles. "I'm thankful we have this meal, and I'm thankful I have such a good son to share it with," he said. Naruto smiled broadly, his tan face lighting up with joy. Iruka didn't really believe in praying, but he liked the idea of taking time every day to focus on the positive things in his life instead of the negative. Besides, it gave him an opportunity to remind Naruto of how much he was loved.

"I'm thankful we get to eat ramen, instead of vegetables!" Naruto announced, before digging into the meal. Iruka smiled at his antics and ate his ramen at a more leisurely pace than his young charge. When Naruto was done inhaling his food, the boy began the ritual protestation of teeth brushing.

"You know I'm going to make you do it no matter what excuse you think up, so you might as well get to it." Iruka watched as Naruto pouted, attempting to convince him with puppy dog eyes. He was more affected by those big blue eyes than he let on. "Go on, Naruto. I'm ready for bed. It's been a long day," Iruka said softly. Sensing his adopted father's tiredness, Naruto quit his game and trudged into the bathroom to wash up. Iruka followed shortly after and brushed his teeth as well. When the two were done, Iruka led Naruto into the tiny bedroom filled mostly with the double bed. Naruto crawled in and moved over to the wall, waiting patiently to be tucked in. Iruka straightened out the messy covers and then drew them up over the young boy's torso. He tucked them around him, tickling him as he did so, and pretending he couldn't hear Naruto's giggly complaints.

"Stop tickling me!" Naruto whined. Iruka chuckled and quit his teasing. He placed a gentle kiss on the boy's whisker-marked cheek.

"Good night, little cat. I love you," Iruka whispered.

"I love you too, Dad, but no more kisses! That's for babies," Naruto complained, his little chin jutting out as he pouted. Iruka couldn't resist smiling at him.

"You'll always be my baby. It's a hard lot in life, but you'll just have to deal with it," Iruka informed him with a tired smile. The blonde boy scrunched up his face as if the idea was distasteful to him, but Iruka could see the smile tugging at his lips in response to the affection Iruka showed him.

"Dad, tell me a story about the Ninja Academy," Naruto asked, a yawn ending his sentence. Iruka sighed, not really feeling up to it, but trying to think of a story to tell anyway.

"Well, in a little while we'll have enough money that we can move out of this village and into Konoha, where all the ninja train and live. They have a school there just for training ninjas. I'm going to enroll you, so that you can become strong and won't ever have to go hungry or need things. Everyone will respect you, and you'll make lots of friends your age from powerful clans. You won't have to deal with the kind of people that live here – people that don't have any dreams." Iruka watched as Naruto's eyelids drooped.

"Daddy?" he asked, reaching a hand up to touch Iruka's face and hair. He liked doing that right before he went to sleep.

"Hmm?" Iruka replied quietly, leaning into Naruto's petting.

"I want to be the Hokage, but what's your dream?" Naruto asked.

Iruka had a lot of dreams that he could never tell Naruto about – dreams of living a life that didn't involve prostitution or criminal activities. He settled on replying, "My dream is to see you happy and successful in life. Now go to sleep, okay?" Iruka sat with him a little while longer until Naruto curled up into a little ball and began to snore.

Iruka picked up the living room and washed some clothing in the sink, hanging the wet clothes to dry on a wire he'd strung from the table to the kitchen counter. When he was done with the chores for the night, he joined Naruto in the bedroom and gratefully collapsed onto his side of the comfortable bed. Sleep came easy to him after such a long day.

* * *

**A/N:** This story is already completed. I'm cleaning it up a bit as I post it, and updates will be every day. There are 14 chapters, but some of them are 20+ pages. I'm really hoping the readers here on will enjoy this. If you have any comments, questions, or snarky remarks, feel free to leave a review. Thanks! 


	2. Following Dreams

**Chapter 2  
**_"Following Dreams"_

Kakashi tossed and turned, struggling to get some sleep. His large, empty bed mocked him, it seemed. Images of the brunette kept assaulting him. He wanted him again – wanted him sleeping beside him.

It was strange that he couldn't control himself, and it was frustrating.

It was true that a good romp in the sack was a rare treat in his life. It wouldn't have been such a rarity if he liked women, as they were constantly flirting with him, but that wasn't the case. There weren't any other gay men in Konoha that he knew. That was why, while investigating some criminal activity in a poor, civilian village on the northern border of Fire, he jumped at the chance to sleep with a male prostitute that catered to gay men.

He'd overheard some men talking about him in an alley and decided to conduct a personal investigation. He hadn't been disappointed. He had promised himself that it would only be one time, and he would forget about the prostitute after it was over.

He soon realized that was easier said than done. The mission had been completed and he was back in Konoha, tortured by images of the delectable brunette moaning while Kakashi enjoyed the best sex of his life.

He flipped onto his other side, then onto his back, and finally just gave up. He pictured the man with his head tilted back and his lips parted, the arch of his back, the pretty way he moaned – half in pain, and half in pleasure. Roughly, he fisted his erection until he came hard into his hand.

Jerking himself off just wasn't as satisfying anymore. Resignedly, Kakashi got up to go clean himself off. It had been almost two months. Surely it wouldn't look suspicious if he returned to the village? He had a record of fifteen years without requesting any vacation time. Maybe he could take a few days? It would have to be the last time – absolutely the last time – and it would have to sate him.

* * *

Iruka could practically feel Naruto humming with excitement.

"Are we going yet?" He asked for the millionth time that morning. Iruka laughed, almost as eager as Naruto was.

"Not yet, you still have to get your things out of the bathroom. Go finish packing!" Iruka reminded him. Naruto made a protesting noise, but dashed off to complete the last bit of packing. They were only taking what they could carry with a rented donkey. Iruka didn't want to waste money having the furniture moved when it really wasn't worth the trouble. He'd sold it all the day before and made enough that he could easily replace it once they were settled in their new home.

The day seemed so filled with promise – with hope and excitement. It was as if the heavy burdens that were holding him down had been lifted. Naruto would soon be attending one of the best schools in the country and preparing for a career that would make him very well off in life. As for himself, the kind of work he'd had to do to pay for that dream was behind him, and that was almost too good to believe. It still hadn't fully sunk in.

Of course, he'd have to work in Konoha. He'd have to pay rent and buy groceries and all the other expenses of living, but that could be done on a smaller salary.

Naruto came skidding back into the room with the small bag.

"There! That's the last one! Can we go now? _Please_?!" Iruka nodded.

"Yeah, we can go now. I have our passports, I finished all the things I needed to do, and the donkey is waiting for us at the edge of town. This is it, Naruto! It's really happening," Iruka said, a huge grin splitting his face. Naruto squealed in excitement and hurled himself into Iruka's arms, hugging him tightly around the neck.

"Okay, let's go!" he yelled, grabbing as many bags as he could and racing out the door. Iruka, laughing, picked up the rest and followed after him. He didn't look back.

It was very early, and the village that operated mostly at nighttime was quiet and desolate. A filthy man dressed in raggedy clothes stood at the village gates with a tired looking animal.

"Just return him to the stable in Konoha," the man said before passing off the reigns. "There's some food and water for him in the bag. He'll need to stop once, about halfway there, for a break. Give me your bags," he ordered. Iruka and Naruto passed them over, waiting for the bags to be secured so they could set off. They watched as the bags were strapped on impossibly slowly until finally the task was done and the man said, "Alright, you're good to go."

Iruka shared a meaningful look with Naruto.

"You ready?" Iruka asked. The blonde boy nodded, reaching out to grab his hand.

"Ready!"

The two of them left through the opened gates with everything they owned and with the tireless energy of two people working towards a dream.

* * *

Iruka had expected things to be hard for them, but he hadn't expected the obstacles to come so soon. He stood protectively in front of Naruto, armed with the small knife he always carried around for protection. In front of them stood two, unsavory men cracking their knuckles.

"There's a fee to pass through this part of the forest," the largest one said, grinning maliciously. Behind Iruka, Naruto began to growl.

"Get outta our way! We aren't giving you anything!"

"Naruto, hush!" Iruka barked, grabbing the small boy by his shoulder to prevent him from charging at the thieves.

"Yeah kid, better listen to your daddy. Now give us the money you've got and we'll let you go – no trouble at all," the smaller, more malicious looking man snarled. Iruka clenched his teeth. He wouldn't give them Naruto's tuition money. He just wouldn't.

"Naruto, stay back," he ordered, his voice sounding scary even to his own ears. Naruto stared up at him in surprise, but stepped backwards obediently, his blue eyes large and worried. Iruka narrowed his eyes at the thieves. "I'm not giving you shit. I worked too damn hard for my money to just give it up. If you want it, you're going to have to take it. I _won't_ make it easy for you," Iruka growled. The thieves quickly exchanged looks, obviously wondering if Iruka would pose a challenge or not.

The largest one took a step forward, obviously deciding that he wasn't.

"Poor choice," a casual voice drifted down from the trees.

"What? Who's there? Come out!" the smaller thief ordered, spinning wildly in an attempt to spot whoever was in the trees. There was a large puff of smoke, and Iruka stumbled backwards in surprise. Directly in front of him stood a familiar ninja – a client from a few months back.

"A ninja?" the larger thief asked stupidly. The silver haired man didn't reply. Instead, he pulled out a shuriken. The thief scowled, as if for a second his ignorant thirst for brutality was going to win out over common sense.

"Alright, forget it!" the smaller one said, dismissing them with a wave of his hand as he ambled off into the woods. The bigger one grunted, but followed after him after one last glare. The ninja soundlessly tucked away his weapon, and pulled out an adult book. He flipped it open with practiced ease and began to read, following after the thieves into the woods.

"This will only take a second. Wait here," he ordered. Iruka, eyes wide, could only nod.

"He's a ninja!" Naruto exclaimed, scampering to Iruka and helping his father stand.

"Yes, he is," Iruka replied, his heart still racing.

"He was so COOL! I'm going to be JUST LIKE HIM!" Naruto announced, practically bouncing in excitement. "I bet he's beating the shit out of those stupid jerks!"

"Naruto! Don't use that language!" Iruka scolded. Naruto pouted up at him.

"You said it, too!"

"But I'm an adult, and you know I don't talk like that normally. If you say that again you're going to get your mouth washed out with soap. Am I clear?" Iruka said harshly, hands on hips. Naruto nodded, but crossed his arms sullenly. He only pouted for a few seconds before he couldn't contain himself anymore.

"Did you see how he scared those punks? They practically ran off!"

Just then, there was a loud scream from just inside the woods. Naruto's eyes went wide, and then he looked up at Iruka in wonder.

"Do you think he's killing them?" Iruka swallowed thickly and averted his eyes from the spot where they had disappeared into the woods.

"I'm sure he's -"

"Because that would be even COOLER."

"Naruto! Human life, even if it belongs to thieves, is a precious thing. It isn't something that you -"

"Yo," the mysterious ninja said, reappearing in another puff of smoke.

"Hey, hey, hey! How do you DO that? I'm Naruto, and I'm going to be the Hokage some day! Who are you, huh? Can I wear your mask?"

The silver haired ninja's eye widened slightly at the barrage of questions. Iruka scratched the back of his neck sheepishly.

"I'm sorry, he's a bit excited. Thank you for helping us," Iruka said, hoping that the ninja wouldn't say anything that would tip off Naruto as to what kind of life he had left behind. Iruka didn't think he would. The man was staring at the donkey, heavily burdened with bags and currently munching on grass.

"Traveling somewhere?" the ninja asked. Iruka nodded and placed a hand on Naruto's shoulder.

"My son and I are moving to Konoha. Naruto is going to attend the Ninja Academy there." The man's visible eye widened again.

"Hmm…other expenses, indeed," he commented. Iruka was confused for a moment until he remembered that the ninja had been the curious one, and was quoting what Iruka had said after they'd slept together.

Naruto was looking at him curiously.

"What's he talking about?" Naruto asked. Iruka blushed lightly.

"Nothing, Naruto." The boy looked put out, but quickly got over it.

"So what's your name? I bet it's something cool, like…like…THE MASKED KILLER!"

The man raised an eyebrow as Iruka popped Naruto on the head.

"Actually, it's Hatake Kakashi," he corrected, amused by the scene. "So you're going to Konoha…permanently?" Kakashi asked, staring intensely at Iruka. The brunette's blush returned, because there was definitely something dark and suggestive in the man's voice.

"Err…yes. It's going to be a new life for Naruto and I both. I'm hoping to find work that's less…physically demanding," Iruka clarified. He hadn't left his old ways behind him just to go right back into prostitution once he arrived at Konoha. Hatake needed to know that right from the start. Sure enough, there was a flash of disappointment in the man's revealed eye.

"Then I'll accompany you. I'm heading home, myself," he said. Without another word, he pulled out the orange book and began to read as he walked along ahead of them. Naruto turned questioningly to Iruka, who merely shrugged as if to say, 'Just go with it.'

Then Iruka noticed what kind of book he was reading.

"I'm grateful for your help with those thieves, Hatake-san, but my son is only eight," Iruka hinted. He was a little disappointed to see the book though. He didn't know why. Of course, the man came to a prostitute. Iruka really shouldn't be surprised that he read dirty books. Hatake turned to him, an eyebrow arched.

"And?" he asked. Iruka looked pointedly at the book in his hand. Kakashi remained clueless. Since there was no way of complaining about it without drawing Naruto's attention to it, Iruka just sighed in irritation and shook his head.

"Nothing."

"Hey, Masked Killer!" Naruto called out.

"Naruto, don't call him that! He gave you his name, so use it and be polite!" Iruka chastised automatically.

"Alright, alright…Hatake-san, what's it like being a ninja?" Naruto asked. Hatake's nose never lifted from his book while he answered.

"It's hard."

"Huh…well that's okay. I'm tough! I could have handled those thieves back there, you know," Naruto boasted. Iruka smiled and shook his head.

"Hmmm…I think you're lying," Kakashi replied in a monotone. Iruka shot him a sharp look. Naruto was just a little boy. Boys said things like that. He didn't need to be so mean about it. Iruka sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. It was going to be a long walk, and the ninja's personality was already starting to irritate him.

Embarrassed, Naruto stared at his sandals and didn't ask anymore questions. They walked for a while before Naruto yawned. He tugged on Iruka's hand. He'd been so excited that he hadn't slept the night before. Iruka hadn't either. Still, Iruka could tell Naruto didn't want to say he was tired in front of the ninja.

"Hatake-san, we're going to stop for awhile. I need to offer some water to the donkey," Iruka said. The ninja turned, and Naruto quickly dropped Iruka's hand. The ninja nodded, and closed his book. It disappeared into a pocket.

"Naruto, do you need to use the restroom?" Iruka asked. The blonde boy nodded and headed off into the bushes nearby. Iruka went about finding the water pan underneath all of their belongings.

"I was planning on visiting you again," Kakashi announced when he was sure Naruto was out of hearing range. Iruka bit his lower lip nervously.

"I'm not doing that anymore. I just had to save enough for Naruto's tuition. I'm going to get a normal job now," he said quietly.

"So I'm assuming, since you have a brat, that you're not really gay. Did the mother run out or something?" Kakashi said. Iruka didn't know what the man was trying to get at.

"I found Naruto when he was five. I don't know who his parents were," Iruka replied after a few moments. He was saved from any further questioning by Naruto's return. The small boy was rubbing his eyes and his feet positively dragged. Iruka gave some water to the donkey and then re-packed the water and pan. "Naruto, you haven't slept in a long time. I'm going to piggy back you so you can get some rest before we get there."

Naruto, obviously glad for the excuse, protested only for show. He was quick to let Iruka haul him up onto his back. Almost immediately, he nuzzled his head into Iruka's neck and was out like a light. Iruka sighed at how heavy he was but didn't complain.

"Are you ready, Hatake-san?" Iruka asked. Kakashi was giving him a strange look.

"You're going to carry him all the way there?" he asked.

"He needs the nap." Kakashi shrugged.

"You look like you need a nap, too. There's no rush. We can stop and you can let him sleep."

Iruka knew it was really because the silver haired ninja wanted to question him further, but Naruto was heavy.

"Alright. Let's stop for an hour or two." Kakashi nodded and lead the donkey off the main road and into a nice grassy area. The ninja relieved the animal of a few of its bags while Iruka gently laid Naruto down in the soft grass. The donkey began to happily munch at the greens around his hooves. Iruka moved to the other side of the little meadow and sat down, resting against a tree. He was not surprised when Kakashi ambled over to him.

"You didn't answer my question earlier," he persisted. Iruka sighed. Why did Hatake care if he was gay or not?

"I've never really thought about it. Things like that are for people who have free time. As you can see, I've got my hands full with him."

"You're good at avoiding questions you don't want to answer," Kakashi replied with a hint of a smirk in his voice. Iruka just closed his eyes and didn't respond. Kakashi left him alone after that.

It was Naruto who shook him awake.

"Come on, Dad! Let's go! Hatake-san says we're close!" Iruka groaned at the loud voice assaulting his ears. He cracked an eye open to see he was still leaning against the tree and Naruto was almost nose to nose with him.

"Okay, okay, I'm up. Give me a hand?" The blonde boy tugged him up and raced back onto the road, full of energy again. Iruka wished he could be so energetic after a short nap. As it was, he just felt like going back to sleep.

"Are you ready?" Hatake asked. Iruka yawned and nodded.

"Yeah, let's go," A soft smile turned up his lips, "I'm excited to see Konoha, too."

* * *

When they reached Konoha, Iruka was asked to show his passport. He did so happily, and the wide gates were opened for their little group. He turned to Kakashi, about to thank him.

"Do you know where you're living yet?" Kakashi asked. Iruka sighed as he saw how big Konoha was. It was getting late – they'd just have to go to an inn. He couldn't search for an apartment at night.

"I guess we'll just be going to the inn for now," Iruka said.

"You could…but the inn here is expensive. The only guests that come to Konoha are ninjas from other villages with large incomes, and the prices reflect that. Stay with me. I have an extra room," he offered. Iruka blushed and started to politely turn him down, but Naruto interjected.

"Yeah! Sure we will! This is going to be great! I'm going to see where a ninja lives! Dad and I will cook dinner for you, too, won't we Dad?" Naruto exclaimed. Feeling awkward, and not getting any help from Kakashi, Iruka felt like he had no other choice but to agree.

"Okay then…if you really don't mind, Hatake-san? You've done so much for us already," Iruka said politely. The silver haired ninja smiled underneath his mask and his eye curved happily.

"I don't mind at all, and call me Kakashi," he said. He then noticed a group of three older kids walking out of a restaurant nearby.

"Hey!" he called out loudly. The kids looked up, their eyes widening when they saw whom it was. When they approached, Kakashi asked, "You three are Anko's Genin team, aren't you?"

"Yes, Hatake-san," the lone girl answered with a short bow.

"I have some training for you. Take this donkey and return it to the stables," Kakashi ordered. The three waited, as if expecting more. Kakashi easily grabbed the bags off the donkey and looked at them as if they were stupid. "Well? What are you waiting for?"

The kids jumped to grab the donkey's reigns and took off quickly. They waited until they thought they were out of earshot to begin grumbling.

"Does everybody just do whatever you say because you're a ninja?" Naruto asked, obviously impressed. "Cause when I'm a ninja, I'm going to quit brushing my teeth and then my dad can't do anything about it 'cause he'll have to do what I say!" Naruto concluded. Iruka snorted.

"I don't care if you're the Hokage, Naruto, I'm still going to make you brush your teeth and eat your vegetables." Kakashi watched as Iruka tickled Naruto, only letting him go when he begged for mercy.

Kakashi realized that, unlike when Iruka had been sleeping with him, he was genuinely enjoying himself now. It was as if a weight had been lifted off of the man's shoulders and he was just happy to be alive. He was beautiful. All Kakashi could do was stare.

"Earth to Hatake-san! Where do you live?" The hyperactive blonde asked. Kakashi was snapped out of his reverie. He scowled at the boy but then remembered his goal was to get into Iruka's pants, and being rude to his son wouldn't get him very far.

"I'll show you. Which of these bags is yours?" he asked. Naruto quickly took his things and Iruka stepped forward to take his, but Kakashi quickly swung the pack over his shoulder. "I've got it. Come on," he said. He led them through Konoha, grateful that he'd cleaned up his place before he took his two vacation days.

Finally, they reached his apartment. He had a nice place. It was a two-bedroom apartment with a view of the mountain. It was newly furnished and in pristine condition. He unlocked the door and waited for them to go inside.

"Wow! This is really nice, Hatake-san! Dad, check it out! I bet he doesn't even have roaches!"

Iruka flushed red with embarrassment. He'd done the best he could for Naruto, but he still felt guilty that he couldn't give him more. He entered the luxurious apartment and Kakashi carried his bag into one of the bedrooms. Naruto followed after him and put down his own bags.

"So, what would you like for dinner?" Kakashi asked.

"Ramen!" Naruto said loudly. Kakashi winced on the inside. Iruka better fall for his charm quick, because he really didn't know how long he could put up with his brat.

"Naruto, no ramen. I'll cook dinner if you have groceries on hand," Iruka offered. Kakashi went into the kitchen and called out some various foods, good food, expensive meats and lots of variety.

"Will any of that do?" he asked. Iruka snorted.

"Yeah, I think I can manage," he replied. Naruto was poking his nose through the kitchen like a curious little raccoon.

"He's got so much food! How many kids do you have, Hatake-san?" Naruto asked. Kakashi looked at the meager contents of the fridge and wondered if the kid was crazy.

"I live alone," he answered. Naruto grinned and actually poked him in the stomach.

"Then you'd be fat! Look at all the food he's got, Dad!" Naruto exclaimed repetitively.

"I see, Naruto. He must have been grocery shopping recently. Why don't you unpack one of your puzzles and occupy yourself, okay?" Iruka encouraged, steering his son into the bedroom. While he was gone, Iruka apologized.

"Naruto isn't used to…this kind of lifestyle. What you have is very luxurious in his eyes…in mine, too, actually. All we usually have is ramen because it's cheap. Please excuse him."

Kakashi felt the urge to show Iruka true luxury. He could think of some great restaurants that the brunette would probably love, and Kakashi realized he'd probably never been to the hot springs before. The poor guy needed a break from his kid. If Kakashi hadn't paid him for sex, he would have thought the man was a saint. He offered to help him in the kitchen and Iruka gave him some vegetables to chop.

"Where are you planning on working?" Kakashi asked curiously.

"Oh, I'll probably take whatever I can find. I'm not afraid of dirty jobs. Anything is better than…well, you know."

"I wasn't that bad, was I?" Kakashi asked, making sure his voice sounded teasing. Iruka rolled his eyes and shot him a grin.

"You were an exception. Is that what you'd like to hear?" Iruka replied, just as teasingly. Kakashi looked put out. Iruka snickered at him. "Hey, you weren't old or fat. That already makes you different from everyone else."

Kakashi helped him quietly for a few moments and then said quite suddenly, "I want you again."

Iruka didn't even pause. "I figured you did."

"What's it going to take?" Kakashi asked. Iruka sighed, closing his eyes tightly. He looked in the general direction of the bedroom Naruto was in, trying to find a toy to play with.

"You'll tell everyone about my past if I don't, or you'll make things hard for Naruto," Iruka stated. Kakashi was about to protest that he wouldn't, but Iruka continued. "So if you want me you'll have to pretend you're dating me…and you have to do everything you can to help Naruto succeed at becoming a ninja."

"How much?" Kakashi asked. Iruka sighed.

"I don't want your money. At least if it's under the pretense of dating, I can fool myself into thinking I'm not whoring myself again."

Kakashi nodded, not really understanding Iruka's reasoning but not really caring as long as he got what he wanted. He felt a little guilty, but after months of sexual frustration and lurid wet dreams, Kakashi was thinking primarily with his other head. His inner pervert was pleased. The circumstances were almost kinky.

"So tonight?" Kakashi pressed. Iruka nodded in resignation, just as Naruto came bounding back into the room with a beat up book. It was horror stories. He flipped it open and read while he walked, just like he'd seen Kakashi doing.

The sight made Iruka really sad. It was obvious that Naruto had found a new hero to idolize, and Iruka would do everything he could to make sure Naruto never found out Kakashi's true intentions.

Kakashi set the table and Iruka served dinner. They were all sitting and Kakashi was about to dig into the tantalizing meal when Naruto interrupted.

"Wait! We have to say thanks!" Naruto said, looking to Iruka. The brunette gave him a tight smile.

"It's a family tradition," he explained to Kakashi. The silver haired ninja arched an eyebrow, but didn't comment.

"I'm thankful that I'm gonna be a ninja, and that Hatake-san is my new friend, and that my dad doesn't have to be sad here," Naruto said earnestly, his head bowed. Iruka swallowed thickly.

"I'm thankful for all that too, and for Kakashi's hospitality," Iruka said quietly. Naruto immediately began to inhale his food like he usually did, but then slowed down to savor the excellent taste.

"Dad, this is really good!"

"I'm glad you like it, Naruto."

"It is – it's excellent," Kakashi complimented. "With cooking like this, I might not let you leave," he said, half serious. Naruto grinned.

"We could stay here and my dad can cook for you!" Naruto offered.

"Naruto, he was only joking." Iruka wanted to tell the boy to quit embarrassing him, but Naruto didn't know what was going on so such a reprimand would be unfair. He sighed.

Finally, dinner was finished and Naruto carried the dirty dishes to the sink like Iruka had taught him to do.

"I think my toothbrush got lost on the way," Naruto tried hopefully. Iruka laughed despite himself and ruffled the blonde's wild hair.

"Nice try. It was creative. Brush your teeth," he ordered. Naruto groaned but went to fetch his toothbrush. To Kakashi, Iruka said, "Let me get him to bed. Then I'll sneak away." Kakashi nodded and took over washing the dishes.

"Let me get these," he said. Iruka nodded and followed after Naruto. The door to Naruto's bedroom was open, and Kakashi watched Iruka tuck the boy in with mild fascination.

"Alright, into bed, little cat," Iruka said, obviously teasing the boy because of his strange, whiskered cheeks.

"Aw, Dad, don't call me that!" Iruka laughed and tucked the covers around him, tickling him as he did so. The kid squirmed and giggled but laid still the second Iruka stopped. "Tell me a story?" he asked. Iruka shifted a bit to get more comfortable.

"Once upon a time, there was a brave ninja -"

"Did he have a mask?" Naruto interjected. Kakashi smirked. Okay, so the kid had his moments. Kakashi could tell Iruka was smiling.

"Once upon a time there was a masked ninja from Konoha, who was the bravest and most respected ninja in the entire country."

Kakashi smirked. He wasn't going to brag or anything, but…

"Did he read an orange book?" Naruto asked.

"No. No orange book. That was another ninja, who wasn't as brave or respected as the ninja I'm talking about," Iruka said flippantly, probably aware that Kakashi was listening.

"Did he use his shuriken to scare off some big, scary thieves and rescue the Hokage?" Iruka sighed.

"Now how did you know the end of the story? Alright, it's time for you to go to sleep, Naruto." Iruka leaned over the boy and kissed his forehead, while the child patted his cheek.

"Night, Dad. I love you a whole lot," Naruto said.

"I love you too, kiddo, more than anything. Goodnight, little ninja," Iruka replied.

"That's better than little cat," Naruto mumbled sleepily.

"Okay then. I'll say that from now on. Now go to sleep." Iruka stood and left the room, closing the door tightly behind him. Immediately, his happy mask vanished.

"Do you have a radio or something?" he asked. Kakashi nodded. Abandoning the dishes, he found the small device on a shelf and flicked it on. Soft music spilled out of the speakers, loud enough that Naruto wouldn't be able to hear them in the other room. "Alright, are you ready?" Iruka asked softly. By way of answer, Kakashi grabbed Iruka's thin, black T-shirt and pulled him against his chest. Greedily, he slanted his mouth over the brunette's and kissed him deeply. He was already hard. The kind-hearted man was like a drug, Kakashi thought. He guided him backwards into his bedroom, closing the door soundlessly behind him. Immediately, his hands found the hem of Iruka's shirt and tugged it up. Kakashi broke the kiss so he could take a deep, shuddering breath.

"You obviously missed me," Iruka commented, still reeling from the passionate kiss.

"Mmm…" Kakashi murmured in agreement as he freed Iruka's hair from the tie. He began to pull off his own vest and toe out of his sandals.

"How…how do you want me?" Iruka asked quietly. Kakashi's brain raced through a myriad of poses but eventually settled on page twenty-five of his favorite Icha Icha novel.

"Doggy style," Kakashi said happily, already grinning. Iruka barely refrained from sighing and pulled his pants down. He'd had some unpleasant experiences with the position, but complaining wasn't in his nature.

Obediently, he crawled onto the huge bed and glanced over his shoulder.

"Do you have lube?" Iruka asked. Kakashi shot him a look that very clearly said, 'What do you think?' Iruka sighed. "Stupid question."

Kakashi fetched it from a drawer in the nightstand and quickly uncapped it. Fully naked now, he squeezed the lube into his hand and coated himself thoroughly.

"It's been a few days, so why don't you let me put on a little show for you?" Iruka asked, accustomed to getting his way during sex by making the client feel like it was for their enjoyment rather than his comfort.

"I want to prepare you, and I would have even if you hadn't asked me to," Kakashi replied, a bit of an edge to his voice. "I don't want you to treat me like I'm a customer. I don't care if you cry, but I want it to be sincere, and tell me if I'm hurting you."

Dropping the act, Iruka nodded. At least he didn't have to pretend he was enjoying it. To be honest, he'd never really enjoyed anal sex. He was used to it, but his introduction to anal sex at too young of an age hadn't been enjoyable or consensual. It was hard to get past that negative association, and not many had given him much reason to try.

Kakashi's slick fingers began by massaging his backside, occasionally sliding down the backs of his thighs. Iruka squirmed a bit, because the inside of his knee was a ticklish spot. Smirking, Kakashi honed in on his weakness and bent over to lavish the spot with his tongue. Iruka collapsed flat onto the bed, dropping the position while he squirmed and tried not to let out very unmanly giggles. Then, when Iruka thought he was going to crack and laugh out loud, Kakashi moved away from the spot and Iruka's whole body sagged in relief.

"There, now you're not so tense," Kakashi said softly as his fingers began to massage again. Iruka couldn't tense again so soon after laughing so hard, so he merely stayed relaxed and pliant as the fingers worked magic over his tight muscles. He kept expecting the massage to end, but it kept going and going, over every inch of skin until he was a pile of boneless mush and had closed his eyes in contentment. He heard a low moan and realized with no small amount of surprise that it had come out of his mouth.

One thing led to another and soon they were both finished. They panted in unison for a few moments before Kakashi slid out and placed a kiss on the small of Iruka's back. The silver haired ninja rolled onto his side, staring at Iruka's flushed face and open mouth, his dark lashes fluttering with his erratic breathing.

Iruka's eyes opened and he focused on him.

"You're handsome," he said, his brown eyes caressing Kakashi's revealed face. Kakashi smirked.

"I never show anyone my face. You made me loose control," he complimented. "I just can't get enough of you. Even now I want more," Kakashi confessed. As if to prove his point, he reached a pale hand to Iruka's face and touched his lips. With a playful smile, Iruka darted his tongue out and licked the digit.

"I take it that means you weren't in any pain?" Kakashi asked, pulling his fingers away in order to scoot his body closer to Iruka's and wrap his arm around him.

"No, just pleasure. Lots and lots of pleasure," Iruka replied. He felt out of it, as if he'd simply floated away from his body and was lost in outer space. He grinned. "I saw stars," he confessed incredulously. Kakashi shared his grin.

"So this…between you and me…won't be so bad? Because if you didn't want to…I wouldn't reveal your past to anyone," Kakashi said. Iruka's eyes darkened.

"You're going to make me choose to do this, aren't you? It was easier when I felt like you were forcing me. I told myself I wouldn't…not with anyone ever again." Iruka snorted in a self-depreciating kind of way. "That's lasted all of one day."

"I'll make it perfect. I can be romantic, too. I'm not just a big pervert. I'll take you on dates and I'll spoil you rotten," Kakashi said. Iruka sat up slowly, but didn't push Kakashi's arm off his waist.

"I just…I need time to think about it. This is happening really fast," he replied. "I have to consider Naruto's feelings. If I can avoid it, I don't want him to get teased at school because of my actions. It's going to be hard enough on him as it is. The other kids at the school will be from a different social class than he is. They'll probably look at him like he's trash," Iruka fretted. Kakashi sighed.

"Can't you think of what _you_ want for once? The kid will adjust," Kakashi said dismissively. Iruka did push his arm off then.

"I have to think of Naruto first, always, no exceptions," Iruka's fierce expression softened. "He's my child. That's what you do for your children. They come before your wants and needs – always," Iruka said with conviction. Kakashi stared at him a moment, and then he sat up as well.

"I wouldn't know. My father shamed himself and then committed suicide. I've been on my own for a long time." Feeling pity for the man, Iruka reached out and caressed Kakashi's shoulder comfortingly.

"I'm sorry. My parents died when I was young, too. They were ninja. There was a monster…"

"The fox demon?" Kakashi asked. Iruka nodded.

"I was about thirteen, so I was shipped off to an orphanage in the north, and that was the last time I felt like a child. They worked us all hard at the orphanage. There was a lot of sexual abuse, too. When I found Naruto, I couldn't send him there. My life changed. It was like I had a reason to get up in the morning. I owe Naruto everything. He's my world. I won't hurt him for a good fuck." Iruka was beginning to feel upset. He was sticky, on top of all that.

"I think I understand now. Don't get angry. You can have all the time you need." Kakashi sighed, and winced at the mess they'd made. "I need a shower. Come with me?"

Feeling closer to the man because they'd talked and Kakashi had showed him another side of himself, Iruka didn't reject the invitation.

"That sounds good," he said, much to Kakashi's surprise. Pleased, Kakashi tugged Iruka up off the bed and led him into the connected bathroom. He turned on the shower and adjusted the water until it was nice and warm. He got in and Iruka followed after him..

When the shower was done, Iruka fetched his clothes from the floor and dressed again. He gave Kakashi one last, lingering kiss before he returned to the room he was sharing with Naruto. Kakashi stripped the messy sheets off his bed and reclined on the bare mattress, instantly drifting off into a deep, restorative sleep.

* * *

**A/N: **Yes, there was more to the sex scene but doesn't allow it, so it was edited. I tried to leave as much as possible, though, so you didn't miss any of the emotions. Sorry this update was so late today. I didn't get home as early as I thought I would. Thanks for all the wonderful reviews. I loved them. :) 


	3. Realizations

**Fighting Dreamers**  
_By: Kung Fuu  
_  
**Chapter 3**  
_"Realizations"_

Iruka found an apartment the next morning, after minimal searching. It was the cheapest available in Konoha – smaller than their last place and with no division between the kitchen and the bedroom. The bathroom was a public one used by everyone on their floor of the apartment complex, and the building was one of the older ones in Konoha. Still, it was cheap and safe, and the market was close by. They even had a small balcony, though Iruka didn't think it looked very stable. He certainly wouldn't be standing on it anytime soon.

The first day in Konoha was spent unpacking, purchasing some cheap furniture, and turning the room into a home. Naruto's artwork went on the small refrigerator, and Iruka's only picture of his parents was given a place of honor on the end table. Wanting to be cautious with his money, Iruka had purchased a couch the made out into a bed instead of buying a mattress and a frame. He bought a small radio, because he and Naruto liked listening to music in the evenings, along with a table big enough for them to eat at. A small dresser held their clothing and the pantry was filled with ramen. Physically, it didn't look much different from their old place, but mentally the change was enormous.

Naruto had gone to explore the village (with a stern warning not to get into any trouble) and so Iruka was left to finish the last bit of unpacking in the early afternoon. It also gave him some quiet time to do some thinking – a rarity in his life.

He had thought that Kakashi was going to blackmail him into prostitution again, but instead the man had given him the best sex he'd ever had and told him about his past. Despite the fact that Kakashi was wealthy and successful, Iruka pitied him. He could see in Kakashi the loneliness that had almost consumed him before he'd found Naruto.

'_Just because I pitied him, I shouldn't have comforted him in the way that I did,' _Iruka thought with a sigh. _'Now he probably thinks I'm interested.' _

Iruka stared out the tiny kitchen window and tried to sort out his emotions. Through the grimy glass (which needed a good cleaning, he thought to himself) he could see people bustling about in the market below. It was a jarring thought to think they were all strangers. His eyes searched absently for a shock of silver hair and a small smile appeared on his tired features.

He and Naruto had one friend, at least. At least Iruka felt some kind of connection with Kakashi because he knew the loneliness the man felt.

'_The sex was good – pretty amazing, actually, but it was still just sex,' _Iruka thought. Sex had been Iruka's job. He was tired of sex. It simply wasn't as meaningful to him as it probably was to Kakashi. He'd let their intercourse become a little more romantic and personal than he usually did, but that didn't mean he had to date the man. He didn't want that. He wasn't ready emotionally, and moving to Konoha was all about giving Naruto a chance to succeed. Iruka was pretty sure having a gay father wouldn't do any favors for the boy.

It just wasn't worth the risk – no matter how much Iruka pitied the lonely ninja. He could be a friend, and he would make an effort to welcome the man into their lives, but he would not sleep with him again as long as he had a choice. That part of his life was over, and it was over for good.

The front door opened and Naruto came bursting in, blood streaming down his chin. Iruka's eyes snapped away from the window and onto his young son. Immediately he switched into mother hen mode.

"Naruto! What happened?" Iruka exclaimed, gripping his son's shoulders and inspecting him for more serious injuries. His son growled and turned his head away, obviously in a foul mood. Iruka guided him to a chair and sat him down, fetching a wet rag from the kitchen to clean him up with. "Answer me, Naruto!" Iruka ordered. The blonde boy's bottom lip stuck out stubbornly at first, but then it began to tremble. Fat teardrops began to roll down his whiskered cheeks. Worriedly, Iruka fussed over the busted lip and brushed away the tears with his thumbs. Finally, Naruto opened his mouth and the story came out in a huge jumble. Confused, Iruka shushed him and asked him to repeat it more slowly.

"I was in the m-m-market at a ramen place, and this b-boy my age came up and ordered some. He asked me why I wasn't ordering anything and just s-standing there looking stupid, and then he looked at my clothes and said that it must be because I didn't have any m-m-money, and I told him to take it back but he wouldn't, so I told him to shut up because I was going to be a ninja, but then he said I was w-weak to be a ninja, so I hit him because he made me mad!"

Iruka frowned deeply. He didn't know whether to find the little brat and make him apologize, or race Naruto to the hospital to make sure he wasn't too badly injured. It was irrational thinking, he knew, but the sight of Naruto's blood made him feel so helpless.

"Did the boy hit you back? Did you hurt him?" Iruka asked, his voice very stern. Naruto's crying died down to sniffles.

"I missed him, but he hit me hard. I started to cry – I couldn't help it! And then some girls laughed at me and he called me a crybaby. I hate him!" Naruto wailed. Iruka bit the inside of his cheek hard, hating the situation and kicking himself for letting Naruto go out alone. Worst of all was the fact that it was his fault that Naruto was wearing shabby, second hand clothing. He cursed himself for not being able to give Naruto nice things.

"I'm sorry he gave you a hard time, little cat. I wish I could fix it but I can't. People might tease you here. They might tell you that you'll never become a ninja, but you can't listen. You just can't. If you want it bad enough, what they say doesn't matter, okay? They're only saying such mean things because they don't know how strong you really are, but they'll see one day," Iruka said, pulling Naruto into a hug. His son quit crying and swallowed thickly.

"It's going to be hard here, isn't it Dad?" Naruto asked, sounding much older than he was. Iruka felt something heavy in his chest. Naruto was growing up and learning life's lessons, no matter how much Iruka wished he could hold onto his little boy.

"Most things worth doing in life are hard, Naruto, but I'll always be here to help you when you need it. I haven't been able to give you much, and I may never be able to give you anything more, but I can give you my promise that you'll always have a place to come home to as long as I'm around."

Naruto was quiet for a few moments and then he said, "You worked really hard so I could come here and make friends. I'm sorry I got in a fight." Iruka flashed him a small, proud smile.

"You know what? If it had been me, I probably would have hit him, too." Naruto grinned a bit mischievously, but then it faded.

"But I didn't hit him! He made me look dumb," Naruto replied sadly. Iruka grinned and ruffled his hair.

"Well, that's why you'll be going to the Academy soon. They'll teach you how to fight so no one will talk down to you without thinking twice about it. Cheer up, okay? Smile for me?" Iruka cajoled. Naruto grinned a bit, and then tenderly touched his fat lip.

"The next time I fight that guy, I'm gonna win!" he boasted. Iruka was glad to see Naruto regain his fighting spirit.

"He'll deserve it too, if he's going around calling people stupid," Iruka replied. Standing again, Iruka glanced out the kitchen window. "I've finished unpacking, and it's still not too late. Let's go visit the Hokage and enroll you, alright?" Iruka asked. Naruto nodded and hopped off the chair. "Go change your shirt," Iruka instructed. Naruto fetched a clean shirt from the dresser and pulled it on, followed by his thin black jacket. Iruka studied it with a frown. It really did look shabby. Perhaps it wasn't so noticeable in their old village, but here in Konoha where most people were wealthy, he and Naruto looked different. He would have to pay the entrance costs and see if they had any funds left to buy Naruto some new clothing.

* * *

Iruka and Naruto made their way to the Hokage tower and explained their purpose to a ninja on secretarial duty. The dark-haired man looked at Naruto critically, as if doubting he had what it took to make it in the Academy. Iruka began to inwardly fume, and realized that he might be getting into his first fight in Konoha, too, if the man didn't let them see the Hokage.

"He's very busy this afternoon, and most Academy students are enrolled at five years old. He's just going to tell you that the kid is too old and too far behind already," the man drawled lazily, flipping through a stack of paperwork as he did so. Iruka clenched his fist tightly, about to tell the man just where he could shove his paperwork, when a familiar voice interrupted their conversation.

"Let him see the old man," Kakashi ordered. Iruka turned, and Naruto pointed at him excitedly.

"It's the Masked Killer!" he exclaimed. Then, speaking to the secretary, "He's my friend. You better not call me names or he'll beat you up!" Naruto boasted. Kakashi raised an eyebrow and Iruka smiled sheepishly.

"Hush, Naruto. Don't go around saying things like that!" Iruka chided.

"Yeah, kid, quit lying and show some respect to the legendary Copy Ninja," the man snorted, "as if he'd actually associate with a little brat like you!"

With a smile that made his lone, revealed eye turn upwards happily, Kakashi casually placed a hand on Naruto's shoulder.

"I'm tutoring him. He'll catch up to the other kids in no time at all," Kakashi announced. The man gaped and then shuffled his papers furiously.

"I didn't…I'm very sorry…I've _never_ heard of you taking on a student, so you _must_ understand that I had no way of knowing, Hatake-san…Of course that changes things! Let me alert the Hokage that you're here. It will just be a moment," he said before practically running off, shooting worried glances over his shoulder as he scuttled down the hallway. Naruto laughed at him.

"Did you see his face, Dad? That was great!"

"Yes, Naruto, I saw. It seems we're in Kakashi's debt yet again," Iruka said with a gentle smile. Kakashi basked in it, focusing his attention on Iruka completely, his hand instantly dropping from Naruto's shoulder.

"It's nothing. I've finished my mission early today. Would you like to get some dinner after you speak with the Hokage? My treat," Kakashi suggested confidently. Iruka's heart went out to the man who had no one to share his meals with, and with a kind smile he accepted. Naruto, feeling left out, tugged on Kakashi's sleeve and pointed to his lip.

"Look, Kakashi-sensei! I got into a fight today! I can tell you all about it at dinner, but we're going to need to do lots of training. I have a rival now!"

"Sensei?" Kakashi repeated in a confused tone, "And won't it be getting too late for you to be awake?" Kakashi realized with mild horror that Iruka assumed (incorrectly) that Naruto was invited to dinner as well. Iruka's expression showed understanding and then he frowned.

"Naruto, I think Kakashi was just saying that he was your teacher so that man would let us through. He's very busy and –"

"So you don't want to teach me?" Naruto interrupted, looking imploringly up at Kakashi, his hand still holding onto the tall ninja's sleeve. Kakashi glanced at Iruka and then at his son and realized (with a depressed sigh) that the two of them were a package deal.

"Sure, I'll teach you a few things," Kakashi agreed reluctantly. Naruto positively beamed, but Kakashi's reward came from the soft, grateful smile that Iruka gave him, as if he'd just given the man a wonderful gift.

The secretary returned.

"He'll meet with you now," he announced, noticing worriedly the familiar way Naruto held onto Kakashi's sleeve, and how casual and friendly they all looked together. He sincerely hoped he wasn't on Kakashi's bad side now.

Iruka nodded at the flustered man and followed after the secretary with Naruto on his heels. He turned, though, to clarify their plans with Kakashi.

"Will you be waiting here?" he asked. Kakashi nodded.

"I have to turn in a mission report, but I'll meet you back here." Iruka nodded, flashed him one last smile, and disappeared down the hallway. Feeling proud of his advancement in Iruka's good favor, Kakashi practically floated to the mission room.

* * *

Iruka returned to the front desk with a significantly lighter wallet. Thankfully, he wasn't broke. He wouldn't be able to afford new clothing for Naruto if he wanted to have rent and grocery money, but they would have a roof over their heads and Naruto was officially enrolled. He would start after the weekend was over.

Naruto was practically bouncing with excitement, despite the lateness of the hour. Kakashi was waiting for them just outside the building, casually reading his book to pass the time. Iruka frowned a bit upon seeing the cover, but smiled again when Kakashi tucked it away.

"I'm sorry we made you wait. I hope it wasn't for very long," Iruka apologized. Kakashi shrugged.

"It wasn't that long. Is he enrolled now?" Kakashi asked unnecessarily. Naruto wouldn't have been smiling so broadly if he'd been rejected.

"Yes," Iruka confirmed, "Everything is finally taken care of."

"I'm gonna be a ninja for real!" Naruto added. Kakashi ignored the loud child and tried to start a conversation with Iruka about apartment hunting. Naruto, however, kept interrupting and distracting him.

Iruka was oblivious to Kakashi's growing annoyance. Kakashi was envisioning tying Naruto up and hanging him from a tree with a gag in his mouth by the time they made it to the long line of restaurants. Kakashi had been hoping to take Iruka somewhere expensive and quiet – like one of the places Kurenai was always begging Asuma to take her to – but Naruto's presence ruined that idea. Instead, as they passed a cheap ramen bar, Naruto begged to eat there and Kakashi had little choice but to indulge him.

It was certainly not going to impress Iruka, but Kakashi couldn't imagine bringing a loud mouth kid into a swanky restaurant anyway.

The three of them sat at the bar and Kakashi faked a smile.

"I'm glad to get to have dinner with you again," he said, directing the comment towards Iruka. The brunette gave him a smile that was…full of pity? Kakashi's eye narrowed as he studied Iruka's unmistakable expression.

"I know you must get lonely living alone," Iruka replied. "But Naruto and I will be good friends. Whenever you'd like some company, we'll be here. Isn't that right, Naruto?" Iruka asked, oblivious to Kakashi's growing irritation.

The silver-haired shinobi sighed mentally and hid his irritated scowl behind a menu. He'd shown the brunette a good time, and Iruka been so responsive afterwards, but now it seemed that his actions had been out of pity – not attraction. It sounded cruel even to him, but Kakashi was kicking himself for telling Iruka he would never force him into sex by using his past against him. He'd only said that because he didn't think it would be necessary anymore!

Worst of all, however, was the realization that Iruka, a poor, simple-minded prostitute, pitied him – a legendary, genius ninja! It was almost enough to make him want to forget the whole idea of wooing the delusional man, but then Kakashi reminded himself that Iruka was the only gay man he knew in Konoha.

It was either Iruka or celibacy again. In those terms, the decision was an easy one.

* * *

Perhaps karma was punishing him for his evil scheming, because the kid literally breathed food down – bowl after bowl after bowl. Iruka had tried to stop him, at first, but Kakashi was morbidly fascinated and wanted to see just how much the kid could possibly consume.

Now he was cursing his curiosity. The meal was going to cost him an arm and a leg!

"That's his fifteenth bowl. It's humanly impossible for him to eat anymore. Not even the Akimichi clan could eat that much," Kakashi marveled, wondering if the boy had multiple stomachs or something. Iruka just looked embarrassed, watching in bewilderment as Naruto polished his current one off.

He slammed down the fifteenth empty one and patted his stomach.

"I'm full now," he announced happily. "I don't think I could eat another bite!"

"That's what I was thinking around bowl four," Kakashi commented dryly. Blushing, Iruka fished his wallet out of his pocket.

"I didn't know Naruto was so hungry. Let me pay for his – that's too much for you to cover," Iruka offered, eyeing the large stack of bowls with dismay. Kakashi inwardly sighed and brushed the offer away with a wave of his hand.

"It's nothing. I said it was my treat." He passed a wad of bills to the ecstatic stand owner and stood.

"Hey, hey, Sensei! When are you going to start teaching me, huh?" Naruto asked excitedly, also hopping down off his stool. Kakashi reminded himself for the millionth time that night that he was going to be well rewarded if he just stuck it out for a little longer.

"I could show you some things tomorrow afternoon. Meet me here around four," Kakashi instructed. That way, when they were done, Naruto might invite him over for dinner and he'd have a chance to seduce Iruka once Naruto had gone to bed. That strategy had worked well the first time – no reason it couldn't work again. Confident that his new plan would be successful, Kakashi waved goodbye to the pair and made his way home. As he walked down the quiet, nearly deserted street, the memory of Iruka tucking Naruto into bed filled his thoughts. It was a strange thing to think of, and he wondered why the memory made the wind blowing against him seem just a little less harsh.

* * *

**A/N:** For the reviewer who was concerned that things were going too fast, don't worry. They go up and down throughout the whole thing. It might speed up in some parts, but in the next chapter it will slow down to a crawl. It's just how their relationship is. Again, thanks for all the wonderful reviews! 


	4. Lessons and Lust

**Fighting Dreamers**

**Chapter 4**  
_"Lessons and Lust"_

After Naruto's fight the previous day, Iruka didn't want to let him out on his own again. He was making Naruto work on his studies instead. Iruka had taught Naruto everything he knew, and Iruka was secretly scared that he had not prepared him well enough. Naruto would not only lag behind the other students physically but academically as well. He was a slow learner and required tireless patience to teach, and it wasn't as if Iruka had received an amazing education himself. Most of the time, Iruka was learning what he taught to Naruto just weeks before he gave him a new lesson.

"Ugh! This is so stupid! When am I ever gonna _need_ this?" Naruto growled, pushing the paper away from him in disgust. Bracing himself for a battle, Iruka leaned over the table to see how far Naruto had gotten.

"You didn't even try the first problem, Naruto," he chastised sternly. His son scowled and looked away.

"I hate math," he replied stubbornly. Iruka aimed his best scary face at the petulant boy. Naruto glimpsed him out of the corner of his eye and blanched. Quickly, he picked up his stubby pencil and began to work on his assignment.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," Iruka commented with a smug grin. His son waited until he thought he was absorbed in his book and then Naruto stuck his tongue out at him. "I saw that," Iruka said, his book hiding an amused smile. Naruto's blonde head lowered back over his paper and he began working in earnest, wary of provoking his father any further.

Time seemed to grind to a halt. Naruto alternated between staring at his word problem and glaring at the clock.

A few seconds ticked by. Then, Naruto was positive the hand went backwards instead of forwards.

"Dad! The clock's broken! It's going backwards instead of –"

"DO YOUR MATH!" Iruka roared, his face turning a vibrant, scary shade of red. Naruto looked properly scolded for about two seconds and then, for the millionth time, he started the first problem. Regaining his temper, Iruka sighed and massaged the bridge of his nose. "Do you need help?" he asked wearily. Naruto gave him a long glance and then returned his eyes to his paper.

"No, I know how to do it," Naruto replied innocently.

Iruka felt his eye twitch. It was a close thing, but he kept another outburst reigned in and returned to his reading. Naruto had finished two of the problems before he dared to speak again.

"Hey, Dad?" he asked.

"Hmm?" Iruka asked absently, absorbed in the story he was reading.

"Do you think Kakashi-sensei will be a good teacher?"

Iruka considered the man's personality. He sighed.

"Just don't pull any pranks on him and try to be respectful. I know it's hard for you to focus sometimes, especially when you get excited, but Kakashi probably won't be as patient with you as I am," Iruka said.

"What are you going to do while we train?" Naruto asked, chewing on the end of his pencil. Iruka put his book down.

"I still have to find a job here. I'll probably start this afternoon. Speaking of which, if I'm not here when you get home eat whatever I've left out for you and then get ready for bed, okay?" Naruto nodded and went back to his math problems.

By the time the morning was over and lunch was finished, Naruto had been cooped up inside for quite awhile. Iruka almost felt guilty for delivering him to Kakashi in such a hyper mood. Still, he'd be doing physical exercise, so Kakashi should be able to wear him down quickly. The two of them made their way to the ramen stand at the appropriate time, but Kakashi was nowhere in sight. Resigned to waiting, the two of them took a seat outside the building. They watched the villagers come and go for half an hour and still Kakashi hadn't showed up.

"I'm sorry, Naruto. Kakashi was probably tied up with work," Iruka said to the disappointed boy. Iruka was irritated highly with the man. What kind of person told a child they'd do something and then just blew the kid off without sending word? Naruto looked like someone had told him his puppy had been run over. Again, feeling helpless, Iruka said, "I'm sure there will be other chances, Naruto. Why don't you come with me to do some job hunting?"

Naruto only shrugged. His big blue eyes kept roving up and down the street, searching for a familiar orange book and a shock of silver hair.

"Dad, can I stay and wait just a little longer? If it gets late I'll go home. Please?" Naruto begged. Iruka sighed. He really needed to job hunt, and Naruto would only act sullen and moody if he forced him to go along. Surely, the boy couldn't get into too much trouble just waiting. With a reluctant nod, Iruka agreed.

"Okay, but one more hour tops. If he's still not here by then, go home," Iruka ordered. Naruto nodded, happy that he'd be allowed to stay. Casting one last glance at him, Iruka took off down the street.

Naruto was not entertained by people-watching for very long without Iruka there to make it interesting. The antsy boy got up and walked in circles. The owner of the ramen stand came out, his apron still on, and gave him a friendly smile.

"Hey! It's my big eater!" he greeted happily. Naruto flashed him a bright smile and patted his stomach.

"Yeah, but my dad already made me lunch. I'm here to meet my friend," Naruto explained. The kindly owner indicated a cart loaded with boxes waiting near the back of the restaurant.

"Well, since he's not here yet, would you like to help me out? I'll give you some free ramen passes if you do," he offered. Naruto whooped happily and punched his fist into the air.

"Sure thing, old man!" The owner, whose actual name was Teuchi, merely smiled at the boy's exuberance.

"Alright, well let's get started so that you'll be done before your friend gets here," he said genially. The cart was unloaded quickly with Naruto's energetic help. When the work was done, Teuchi presented Naruto with five meal tickets – good for three bowls each. Reverently, the boy tucked them into his pocket.

"Thanks, old man!" Naruto said. "Hey, hey, what time is it?" he asked, having almost forgotten about Kakashi.

"It's almost five thirty," Teuchi replied. Teuchi was about to ask what time the friend was supposed to arrive when Kakashi casually strolled up, his nose buried in his orange book.

"YOU'RE LATE!" Naruto shouted with his finger thrust towards Kakashi accusingly. Kakashi raised an eyebrow and tucked away his book.

"I was helping a baby bird learn to fly in the forest…" Kakashi said with a happily crinkled eye. Naruto narrowed his eyes at him and then crossed his arms over his chest in a huff.

"You're late and you're lying, too! Better not tell lies around my dad. He gives spankings for lies. He says you should always keep your word and be honest," Naruto informed, completely oblivious to the effect his words were having on Kakashi.

The silver-haired shinobi had to whip out his book to cover his mask; he was afraid he might have a nosebleed. The mental image of getting spanked by the sexy brunette for telling a lie was almost too much to handle.

"Enough about that. Let's get going," Kakashi said briskly, pretending to read as he led Naruto through the village streets towards the training ground. The hyperactive blonde bounced around him, skipping and jumping and generally acting like a moron. "Walk normally. Don't waste energy uselessly," Kakashi said – mostly so that he wouldn't get seasick watching the boy's blonde head bob up and down like a yo-yo.

Naruto nodded determinedly and moved behind Kakashi, imitating his slouched, long stride, one hand in his pocket. Oblivious, as Naruto was behind him, Kakashi merely walked on until they reached the training ground. It was empty, except for a few younger children that scurried off when they saw him approaching.

Kakashi tucked away his book.

"Okay, so we'll start with the basics. Throw a punch at me," he ordered. Naruto did so immediately and without hesitation, barreling into him with his fist extended and his head ducked down. Kakashi easily side stepped him and knocked him off balance. Naruto hit the ground and grunted, but quickly stood up as if ready to charge again. "Easy, easy!" Kakashi said, holding up his hand in a pacifying manner. Naruto huffed, like a frustrated bull, but remained waiting.

"First of all, don't tuck your thumb inside your other fingers when you make a fist. In the unlikely event that you ever manage to hit something, you'll break it. Do it like this," Kakashi said and showed him a proper fist. Naruto nodded, obviously hanging on his every word. "Secondly, never take your eyes off of me. Don't sacrifice vision for power – it becomes too easy for the enemy to retaliate." Naruto nodded, but opened his mouth to ask a question.

"Hey, what's 'retaliate' mean?" Kakashi sighed.

"Retaliation means hitting you back," Kakashi explained. Naruto nodded, his mouth forming the new word a few times silently as if he was trying to memorize it.

"Okay, I got it! What's next?"

It went on like that until Naruto was kicking, punching, and blocking with relative ease. Kakashi kept expecting the boy to show signs of tiring, but after each new lesson he asked for the next one. It had almost been two and half hours of hard exercise – well, hard exercise for a child anyway. Naruto, however, hadn't even broken a sweat.

Kakashi began to get curious about the source of the kid's energy. He stopped Naruto from doing the repeated high kicks.

"Tell me, were your real parents ninja?" he asked. Naruto became quiet. He stared at Kakashi unflinchingly, and Kakashi thought he saw a glimpse of a child that was nothing like the bubbly boy he knew as Naruto. There was something lurking behind those big eyes of his – something steely blue and frightening in its ferocity.

The child was scarred, no matter how he tried to hide it.

"My dad is my real dad. I don't know what you mean," Naruto replied, though his tone suggested he knew exactly what Kakashi meant. His curiosity heightened even more, Kakashi re-phrased.

"Alright then, who were your birth parents?" he asked, feeling as though he'd entered into a staring contest with the boy.

The tension dissipated. Naruto returned to his kicks without being told to do so. Between the movements he spoke.

"I remember being really hungry, but not a normal hungry. I wanted something else. I wanted something red – lots and lots of red. There was a man not like my dad who had me, and then he left me in a dark place. Then I was hungry for food, and I was cold. There were hands that I didn't like, and then shouting, and then dad picked me up and wrapped me in his coat so that I couldn't see anything." Naruto finished the high kicks and began to do lower ones with his other leg, still not paying Kakashi any attention. It was as if he was lost in vague, nightmarish memories. "I didn't know he was my dad then. He was just a stranger. But he took care of me. I didn't like him at first, because I thought he was going to leave me in the dark place again, but he kept me, even though I was really bad. When I got older and I could understand, he promised me he'd never leave me in the dark place. That's why my dad always does what he says he's going to do, so that I know I can trust him and I'll never get left in the dark place again."

Kakashi told him to stop his kicks.

"I think we're done for today," he said quietly. Lost in thought, Kakashi started to wander in the direction of the memorial stone automatically, but Naruto's forcefully cheery voice startled him out of his thoughts.

"Hey! Don't you want to come to my house for dinner?" he asked brightly, as if the scarred, jaded Naruto of a few moments ago had merely been a figment of Kakashi's imagination. Kakashi's eye widened at the abrupt change in demeanor, and he was reminded of his earlier plan.

Sex was good for getting rid of troublesome thoughts, too.

Naruto talked loudly and boisterously all the way back to his new home, but Kakashi knew and could not forget that there was something underneath the underneath where Naruto was concerned – he just didn't know what exactly it was or what to make of it.

He would simply have to study the boy more. For now, he could safely say that his first judgment of Naruto as inconsequential had perhaps been too hasty. Only time would tell.

The apartment was empty when Naruto led him in. Kakashi was extremely disappointed. Still, there was a chance Iruka might return. Besides, it gave him the opportunity to snoop without Iruka knowing. Naruto puttered about in the kitchen re-heating dinner while Kakashi examined the picture of two people on the small table by the couch. Their faces were familiar, but the memory was elusive and fuzzy.

"They're my grandparents!" Naruto said proudly. "They were really strong, brave ninja, but they died a long time ago. They were killed by a huge monster."

"The fox demon," Kakashi commented absently. He'd long ago sealed away any strong emotions connected with the monster that had killed his sensei. Naruto emerged from the kitchen holding a big pot of ramen with two sets of chopsticks. The pot had other random things in it – very obviously a personal recipe. Naruto set the pot down on the small dining table and passed the extra chopsticks to him.

Ignoring his qualms about eating from the same pot as the boy, he took a hesitant first bite once Naruto was distracted with his own eating. The meal was good, and he ate a bit more before feeling satisfied. Naruto continued to eat until the pot was empty.

"So where is Iruka?" Kakashi finally asked. Naruto scratched his belly and glanced at the clock.

"Dad is job hunting. He said I should put myself to bed if he's not back by bedtime. Hey, hey, do you want to tell me a story?" Naruto asked excitedly. "A real ninja story – not the pretend ones dad tells," Naruto clarified. Kakashi was grasping for an excuse when the front door opened and Iruka came in. He looked surprised to see Kakashi sitting at the table, but his surprise quickly morphed into a friendly smile.

"I'm glad Naruto thought to invite you for dinner. Did I make enough?" he asked. Kakashi nodded, and Naruto bounced over to his father to hug him in greeting.

"Did you find a job, Dad?" he asked brightly. Iruka gave him a tense smile and ruffled his hair.

"We'll talk about that later, Naruto. We have a guest now. How was your training?" he asked, successfully distracting the boy. Naruto immediately began recounting everything he'd been told earlier, about kicking, punching, and blocking in a never-ending stream of loud explanation. Iruka took it all in with a serene smile, occasionally shooting Kakashi an amused or sympathetic look, as the narrative warranted. "You did all of that and yet you still don't seem tired," Iruka said with a weary smile.

Kakashi admired how patient he was with Naruto's yapping. The kid wasn't so bad when he was busy doing something, but how on earth did the man survive him when he was bored and unoccupied?

"He's got stamina – lots of stamina. He may not be as technically advanced as the other kids, but he'll probably outlast all of them," Kakashi said. Naruto whooped excitedly at the praise.

"Did you hear that, Dad?" he asked.

"Yes, I heard. I'm glad you got off to such a good start. Have you brushed your teeth yet? Washed your face?" Naruto grumbled and headed for the door that Kakashi assumed led to the bedrooms.

He was surprised to see it was only a bathroom. He didn't show it, though. Kakashi examined the apartment again with a more critical eye. Everything was run down and the room was cramped, but yet somehow it felt like a good place. He couldn't pinpoint why.

"Well, I'm going to put Naruto to bed soon," Iruka commented, his eyes drifting towards the couch. Kakashi took the hint and stood.

"I'm going to wait outside. I'd like to talk to you for a moment when he's settled," Kakashi requested, not leaving much room for argument. Reluctantly, though it was obvious he was trying to hide the emotion, Iruka nodded.

Kakashi leaned against the metal railing of the apartment complex and looked out over the village settling down for the night. It wasn't as pretty a view as he had at his place, but it was still nice to watch Konoha fall asleep as the stars brightened in the sky. The night air was warm and there was a pleasant breeze. Finally, the door creaked open slowly and Iruka slipped out. He shut it gently behind him. He hesitated, but then he moved to stand beside him near the railing.

"Did he behave today?" Iruka asked, forcing a cheerful tone of voice. Kakashi examined Iruka in the starlight – saw how it gently defined his handsome face and slender neck. The shadows made his long hair look darker than it really was – almost black instead of chocolate brown. Without really thinking about it, he reached out a hand to tuck a stray lock of hair being blown by the breeze behind Iruka's ear.

Iruka allowed the touch, but when Kakashi pulled his hand back ever so slightly, Iruka moved away stiffly.

"I wanted to thank you for tutoring Naruto," he began, again in that falsely bright tone. He had turned his back to him and crossed his arms in front of his waist. His eyes were turned up to the stars. Feeling bold and a little reckless, Kakashi closed the distance between them again and wrapped his arms around Iruka's smaller body.

"Then thank me properly," he purred into the man's ear, following his suggestion with a greedy little lick. Iruka shivered, and Kakashi could feel him trembling, but the brunette sighed and leaned away. Kakashi had Iruka's arms trapped underneath his own, so he could not push him off.

"I can't thank you like that. Please let me go," Iruka said calmly. Kakashi, frustrated with Iruka's attempts to push him away, only wanted him more.

"And if I don't?" he asked huskily, tightening his arms around his prey and nuzzling against his exposed neck and shoulder. The shirt he wore was old and the neck of the garment was conveniently stretched out. It allowed him to nibble at Iruka's skin unhindered.

The brunette made a frustrated little noise and turned his head, as if to explain something to him, but it was a mistake. Kakashi was ready and waiting, mask pulled down, to capture Iruka's lips in a kiss. Iruka made a muffled sound of protest, but he was helpless. Kakashi turned Iruka's body and pulled him against his chest, letting the other man feel his growing excitement. Iruka's hands fisted around his flak jacket, but whether it was in protest or neediness Kakashi couldn't tell. He didn't care.

He ended the kiss reluctantly, and only so that he could express himself properly.

"I want to fuck you, Iruka. Right now." Iruka was shaking his head in protest, but his lips were wet with Kakashi's kiss and his eyes were so achingly beautiful and sad at the same time that Kakashi couldn't respect his wishes. He slanted his mouth over Iruka's again, digging his erection into the man's belly, wanting him to _know_ just how much he was desired.

"Stop," Iruka whispered weakly, pulling away from the kiss and turning his face away. Kakashi just kissed his neck instead.

"I can't," he replied harshly, uncaring if anyone saw them. If he turned Iruka over the railing and fucked him right there, would the old metal be strong enough to hold their weight?

They'd soon find out.

"Stop it," Iruka tried again, straining to pull his arms free of Kakashi's embrace. In the process, his hips pushed against Kakashi's and there was proof that Iruka felt it too – it was carnal and hot and sparked like live wire between them.

"You want it, too, damn it," Kakashi replied, roughly cupping Iruka's erection to prove his point. The shorter man took advantage of his freed arm to slap his cheek. Hard.

"I want you to stop. Get a hold of yourself!" Iruka hissed angrily, cradling his throbbing hand against his chest. Kakashi, panting hard, stumbled back a few steps and touched his aching cheek in surprise.

"You slapped me," he said slowly, bewildered that his guard had been completely dropped. He'd lost his precious control again, and the realization left him reeling. In a movement that was cold as ice water - like another slap to the face- Iruka pushed by him.

"Go home Kakashi," Iruka barked. Kakashi heard the door close and lock, as if that could keep him away. As if they were done talking. As if he'd blown it.

Kakashi turned and plowed a chakra infused punch into the metal railing. The whole piece of railing whined, groaned, and nearly fell off the side of the building. His frustration nowhere near appeased, Kakashi growled and teleported himself to the memorial stone, his thoughts swirling like a Sharingan eye gone mad.

* * *

**A/N:** So things are heating up a bit again…and then Kakashi acted like a prick and ruined it. Thanks for the reviews, and I'm glad you guys are enjoying the fic. 


	5. Fifteen Again ADULT CONTENT

Chapter 5

"Fifteen Again"

Iruka did not fall asleep. He couldn't.

What a shitty day it had been. He wanted to throw something, but he couldn't because Naruto was sleeping like a little angel right next to him. Watching Naruto sleep usually calmed him down because there was something so sweet and gentle about it – but not tonight.

He was so furious, mortified, frustrated and worried that he couldn't even think straight. He tossed to his other side, not caring that Naruto had hogged the blankets again. The air in the apartment was cool and goosebumps rose up on his tan skin. He shivered, but wasn't aware that he was cold.

_'What will the other kids say to him? I know we need the money, but he's going to be so embarrassed. I'm so sick of this! I just want to be able to give my son a good life and everything is making it so damn hard!'_ Iruka rolled into a ball and furiously rubbed his upper arms unthinkingly. He was frustrated to the point of tears, but the tears wouldn't come. 

They hadn't come for a long time.

_'It's not fair! I try so hard. When am I going to get a break?'_ Iruka thought as he rolled onto his back again, chewing on a lock of his hair in an old habit that suggested how upset he was.

He'd checked every place he could find. All of them said the same thing. They weren't hiring, but he should check over at the Academy. They always needed help. So Iruka had gone. He hadn't wanted to work so close to where Naruto would be. He felt like it was Naruto's chance to make something of himself, and he couldn't do it with Iruka hovering over him. The only position open was for a janitor. Reluctantly, Iruka had accepted the job.

Iruka was worried the day would come when Naruto would push him away. They were constantly together – hell, they slept in the same bed at night. One day Naruto would realize all the things he didn't have and even though he was a good kid, he'd be bitter. It was only natural. Iruka was bitter inside, and Naruto would be, too. Iruka had tried to shelter Naruto as much as he could, but there would come a time when Naruto wouldn't want to be sheltered. There would be shame. There would be embarrassment.

When Naruto wanted to bring a girl home, he'd feel like he couldn't because all they had was a run down one bedroom apartment. How would he be expected to make friends when he didn't dress like the other children or have the same type of upbringing they had been given? How would he ever fit in with a bunch of rich kids when his dad was scrubbing the toilets at the school?

Then there was the constant fear. All it would take was one person to recognize him, or Kakashi to get angry with him (like he already had), and the secret would be out. The gossip would start. Have you heard? Naruto's father was a prostitute.

While Iruka had been whoring, he'd told himself over and over that it was just a means to an end, but now he didn't regret anything more than he regretted prostituting himself.

He could have sold drugs and stolen merchandise like he'd done before he met Naruto. That kind of work was so risky, though. He knew a lot of people that were dead before twenty because of it. He'd been so far into the gutter that he'd seen prostitution as something steady, secure, and safe. 

What an idiot he'd been. He could have encouraged Naruto to do something less expensive. He could have given Naruto to someone that could actually afford him, instead of selfishly keeping the child as his reason for living. He could have worked three jobs if he had to – anything to save Naruto from what he was sure he would be exposed to when Kakashi realized he'd been refused and decided to blab. Why hadn't he had any foresight?

Iruka got out of bed and went outside, a bit surprised to see the twisted metal Kakashi had left in his wake. He slouched against the wall until he was sitting, head resting on his folded arms.

"What do I do?" he asked the night quietly. Of course, the stars didn't answer him. Before he'd found Naruto, Iruka had been a heavy drinker and he wanted a drink now in a bad way. He felt like a helpless teenager again.

Back in those days, he'd run around with a group of kids that had escaped the orphanage and become something of a family. They faded and reappeared in each other's lives without any regularity, sometimes offering help to each other and sometimes requesting it. It was one of these orphanage refugees, as they called themselves, that had gotten Iruka started on the black market, and another who had introduced him to peddling drugs.

But when he'd found Naruto – he'd given it all up cold turkey. He'd left behind the drinking and the drug scene. He'd started working honestly, and he'd become a good person. He was proud of himself. He felt like a father – like he'd finally grown up. Things had been so hard; Naruto had behaved terribly and sometimes he'd wanted to give up and go back to his old ways, but then Naruto would show a little progress and he'd re-double his efforts.

It was the happiest he'd ever been in his life – even happier than he remembered being during the time he had with his parents. Naruto had given him hope.

Naruto grew and developed dreams of his own, and Iruka was so proud of him. When Naruto said he wanted to be a ninja, Iruka remembered his own parents and wanted that success and honor for his son, too. He was used to sex. It was an easy way to get money quick if you were in a bind, and he'd been forced by lots of unpleasant people, so why not just do it every night for awhile until they could have a better life?

That was how he had thought about it. He didn't realize how painful it would be. He hadn't anticipated the shame, or the loss of pride and dignity. Every night made him hate it more – hate himself more. But he ignored himself and his needs because somewhere along the way he'd stopped caring about himself – only Naruto mattered.

Naruto was getting his chance, but now Iruka felt like he was fucking it up.

Iruka stood and walked down the stairs of the apartment complex, down to the street, past the darkened shops and deeper into the village until the neon lights of a bar assaulted his eyes. He went in, just wanting to escape for a few hours. It was too much, and he was tired of everything. He didn't notice the appreciative gazes of some drunken women as he entered, and he didn't pay any attention to the lecherous old men sitting in the shadows. They were like actors in a play. Iruka had the insane idea that they were the same people that always sat in a bar when he entered one – the same men looking for an affair, the same regulars drinking because life was hard, and the same women wearing too much make up and too little fabric. For a moment, Naruto was gone and he was eighteen again.

_There was Junpei over in the corner, laughing at some tramp who was crying because he was abusive and everyone knew it, running his hand up her thigh and under her dress – too stoned to care that he was out in public. A closer look revealed the girl was Rieko. She'd had cleaning duty with him sometimes back at the orphanage, and he remembered her young face against a backdrop of grungy tile, her tongue sticking out of her lips as she scrubbed the bathroom floors alongside him. When had little Rieko grown up? Junpei glanced at him but did not recognize him. He was too far gone. Iruka passed a booth and a man with a large beer pinched his ass. He turned, recognized the heavily bearded old man and smiled shyly. It was just Sadato. His crotchety old wife had probably kicked him out again. He'd paid Iruka a week's worth of grocery money once to give him blowjob. It was the easiest money Iruka had ever made._

The radio was playing a song that was a strange mixture of guitar and pipes, and a woman was singing a sad melody. Two familiar faces were dancing in the shadows – one was a friend from the orphanage, another one Iruka had met through the black market. The guy's name was Fuuta, and Iruka couldn't remember the girl's name even though he'd shared a beer with her a few months prior. Up at the bar, a red-haired woman was sobbing over her drink. Iruka sat beside her and watched her cry. Aiya was so pretty when she cried. He wished, though, that he could take her pain away and carry it himself. 

Iruka heard the door open again and he turned, expecting another face he knew, and he wasn't disappointed. Mizuki, handsome Mizuki who had been the star of Iruka's first wet dream, sauntered in like he owned the place. Mizuki had comforted him after the owner of the orphanage, a fat toad named Ouga, had called him to his office after everyone else had gone to bed. Mizuki, strong Mizuki, who always said he was going to leave the country some day and be someone important, walked straight towards him and said…

"Iruka? Babyface Iruka? Is it really you?" the familiar voice asked. Iruka blinked and the world slammed into focus. Junpei, Rieko and everyone else were gone – just persistent memories – but Mizuki was real.

"Mizuki?" he asked disbelievingly. The pale man smirked in the same way Iruka remembered and a jolt of excitement raced up Iruka's spine. It was Mizuki. He was really there. His old friend reached towards him and Iruka practically fell off his barstool in his rush to hug the man. Mizuki gathered him into his arms like he always had, hugging him tightly and even spinning him around a bit.

"It is you! How in the hell did you end up in Konoha again?" Mizuki asked, sitting beside him at the bar. His eyes stayed riveted on Iruka, but he gestured for the bartender to pour them some drinks.

"I…well…it's a long story," Iruka replied shyly. Why did he always feel so timid and breathless around Mizuki? Years had passed and it was like nothing had changed between them. Iruka felt like he should tell Mizuki about Naruto, but he didn't. For just a little while, he wanted Mizuki all to himself again. He wanted to feel like Iruka – not like Dad.

"You look good, baby face," Mizuki shot him a playful grin, "Or can I not call you that anymore? Some big boyfriend lurking around here that's going to beat me up now?"

Iruka's mind conjured up an image of Kakashi staring at him so possessively, like he'd just found his own personal sex toy, and he shook his head.

"No. I'm single…and you can always call me that. I've never let anyone else give me a nickname. It's not much, but that was something I could give to you," Iruka replied. It was still there. The mutual attraction practically simmered between them. Mizuki leaned closer to him, ignoring the other patrons at the bar that were shooting them odd looks.

"Gods, I've missed you baby face. This town is _dry_. Look at them all staring – it's scandalizing! A gay couple in Konoha – we'll probably make the radio news tomorrow," Mizuki joked, talking loudly so the other patrons got the message. They quit staring.

"Konoha is nice. It's always been nice. People like me just can't survive here, I guess," Iruka commented sadly. He sounded depressing even to his own ears, and he hadn't even had much to drink yet.

"You're far too sober, baby face. Here, bottoms up," Mizuki ordered, pushing a random drink towards him. Iruka smiled and gulped half of it down. It burned like fire. He felt better already.

"Mizuki…how did you get here? You're dressed like a shinobi. I want to hear that you made it. You beat the odds. Tell me that," Iruka pleaded, a sentimental smile on his face. Mizuki caressed his flushed cheek, threading his fingers through messy hair.

"I made it, just like I said I would. I'm sorry, baby face," he half-whispered. Iruka leaned closer to him, their noses almost touching.

"For what?" he whispered back, his big brown eyes staring up into Mizuki's black ones.

"I said I'd come back for you." Mizuki looked serious – like he thought Iruka might actually be mad at him. Iruka grinned, then laughed, and then shocked everyone who was pretending not to stare by capturing Mizuki's lips in an elated kiss.

"You never kept your promises to me," Iruka reminded him after they pulled apart. Despite the words, Iruka was smiling at his old friend with so much love that a few of the women in the bar smiled at the romantic scene.

Iruka finished the rest of his drink, his eyes never leaving Mizuki's. The pale shinobi sipped at his own drink, equally captivated by the sight of Iruka.

"So you're not mad at me, for how things ended between us?" Mizuki asked, almost hesitatingly. At those words, Iruka finally glanced away from him. His loving, happy expression turned into a somber, saddened one.

"I forgave you a long time ago, I think," he confessed. Beside him, Mizuki stared into his glass.

"I'm a teacher now, at the Academy." Mizuki sounded proud of himself, and Iruka was proud of him, too. Still, Iruka didn't mention Naruto. Not yet.

"I'm proud of you – really proud, Mizuki," Iruka praised sincerely. Mizuki glanced up at him, a mischievous grin on his handsome face.

"I've had to be a good boy for a long time, baby face. I missed you, and everyone really, for so long after I left. We had good times, didn't we?" he asked softly. Iruka, feeling relaxed and pleasantly buzzed, shared his smile.

"Remember that time you and I went to Zato's and that drag queen –"

"Oh god! I'd forgotten that!"

Mizuki blushed lightly and smiled broadly. Iruka snorted into his drink and leaned close to Mizuki again. Flirting back, Mizuki leaned in as well and Iruka brushed his nose along Mizuki's cheek teasingly. Against his smooth jaw he whispered, "You looked so good in those high heels, Mizuki," Iruka joked. The pale-haired man laughed and kissed Iruka's cheek. Mizuki rested his hand on Iruka's back and hooked his foot around the leg of Iruka's barstool. Grinning, he dragged the stool closer to his own, so that Iruka was pressed against his side and his arm was wrapped around him.

To explain his actions he said, "I've seen you fall off too many barstools not to take proper precautions." Iruka laughed at his excuse to get closer and didn't protest.

"It's been hard, Mizuki," Iruka said. He looked sadly into his drink. "I've done some really stupid things, but you're here and you don't know how bad I needed this," Iruka said. Mizuki tilted his head to catch Iruka's gaze.

"Anything worth fighting for is hard, baby face. Didn't I always tell you that? So what are you fighting for in Konoha?" Iruka smiled at him, thinking of Naruto and the time he'd echoed Mizuki's words of wisdom to his son.

"Someone else's dream, I think," Iruka replied. Mizuki shook his head.

"Now that won't do. What's _your_ dream, baby face?" Mizuki was petting his hair and stroking his face gently, and Iruka wanted it to last forever if it was a dream. 

"I don't really know anymore. I think it's him," Iruka replied. Mizuki grinned, but it was tinged with sadness. Iruka finished his third drink and reached for another.

"Is it some stupid boy that doesn't appreciate you?" Mizuki asked. "Because I'll set him straight for you, baby face. Just say the word."

"It's my son, actually," Iruka said. Mizuki's fingers in his hair paused, but then resumed the petting as if nothing shocking had been revealed.

"Did you love her?" Mizuki asked. Iruka looked up to study his expression. There was only resignation there…and kindness.

"I found him on the streets when he was about five. I couldn't send him to Ouga. I got clean and tried to raise him right, like how I remember my parents raising me, but I was stupid to think I could be like them, Mizuki. All I've done is mess things up."

"Well, you must have done something right to get the two of you here. You're in one of the wealthiest villages in the world," Mizuki comforted. Iruka laughed self-depreciatingly.

"He wanted to be a ninja, so I stared prostituting myself to raise the entrance fee," Iruka whispered. Mizuki's fingers clenched around his glass. He was quiet for a long time.

Finally, he said, "You did what you had to do. It was just sex. You're more than your body, you know, baby?" Iruka snorted.

"Yeah, that's what you think until you do it night after night. It's hell, worse than hell. But thanks for understanding better than anyone else would," Iruka replied. 

"Does your son know?" Mizuki asked. Iruka shook his head. 

"Not yet, but he will soon enough. I'm in a real mess this time," Iruka said. He finished his drink and grabbed another. Mizuki stroked Iruka's hair, comforting him as he had done so many years ago.

"Tell me, baby face. I'll help you."

"I let a shinobi from Konoha fuck me a long time ago, and now that we've moved here, he wants me again. The first night we were here, he let us stay at his place. He brought up my past, and I thought he was blackmailing me, so I slept with him again. When it was over, he told me he wasn't going to blackmail me, and I realized he wasn't a bad guy really." Iruka took a long drink and then continued the story. "We talked a bit about our pasts, and he's so lonely – lonely like I used to be after you…well, anyway, I treated him in a way that I shouldn't have. Now he thinks I want to sleep with him and that I'm just playing hard to get, and he tried to force me tonight so I slapped him. He's got to be angry. He's going to tell everyone, and even if he doesn't, the only work I've been able to find in Konoha is at the Academy as a janitor. My son's already having trouble relating to the kids in town. It's going to be even harder for him if his dad is working at his school scrubbing floors."

Mizuki didn't ask who the shinobi was, and he didn't press for more details. That was the wonderful thing about Mizuki. He just listened, and comforted you, and then managed to fix the problem as if he were some kind of superhero. The reality of his actions was quite different, but that's how he'd seemed to Iruka when he was thirteen and Mizuki was sixteen. Mizuki had protected him when he was still new in the orphanage and been the first one to take him out on a date. Iruka's first drink had been with him, and the first smoke (that made him cough terribly) touched Mizuki's lips first. After Ouga called him into the office for the first time, Mizuki had cleaned him up and held him. They'd slept together when Iruka was fifteen and dated each other until Mizuki became old enough to leave the orphanage. For a year after that, Mizuki had snuck him out to live the fast life outside of the orphanage until Iruka was about to turn seventeen. Then Iruka had his heart broken for the first time and Mizuki disappeared. He never really dated anyone again after that. There were other lovers – hundreds, probably, if he counted his years as a prostitute – but there were no more dates. 

He and Mizuki had a long past. There was no one, Iruka thought as he stared at his old lover, who knew him as well as Mizuki did. Every weakness, every fear, every humiliation and every desire…Mizuki knew it all.

A song came on the radio that Iruka recognized. He laughed too loudly, but he was drunk at that point, and grabbed Mizuki's hand.

"Do you remember this song?" he asked, tugging Mizuki off his barstool. His old lover grinned at his antics and allowed himself to be pulled.

"Oh, I remember it."

"We danced to it that night that the carnival came. I don't think anyone slept that night – the whole world was awake. Dance with me?" Iruka asked, borrowing Naruto's puppy dog look in hopes that it was convincing. Mizuki laughed, and didn't care that everyone was staring at them.

"You're drunk, baby face," he replied. Still, Iruka pulled him against his body and hugged him tightly as he swayed. Mizuki, who was hardly buzzed, was well aware that they looked ridiculous.

On the other side of the bar, a tall woman with long, dark hair stood up and shot a playful smile at her companion.

"He's got the right idea. I want to dance, Asuma," she swayed her shapely hips encouragingly until the gruff man joined her – if only to prevent someone else from doing it. A few other pairs followed, obviously deciding the two gay men were just like any other couple enjoying themselves on a Friday night.

The bartender maintained a stoic face that suggested he'd seen it all before.

Feeling a little more comfortable, Mizuki took advantage of their closeness and cooperated. Their dancing found a rhythm and the song ended too soon for everyone's tastes. Another song came on quickly, though, and the dancing continued for the rest of the night. Mizuki kept Iruka well fueled with alcohol, until the bar was ready to close down. It was almost two in the morning when they finally drifted out. 

"Come to my apartment?" Mizuki asked. Iruka was practically falling over.

"I…shouldn't but I…can't remember why. Isn't that funny?" Iruka burst into loud, hearty laughter. Even drunk, he was gorgeous. Time had treated Iruka well, Mizuki thought with a small smile as Iruka tugged at his shirt. "I'm so hot! Are you hot, too? Is it just me?" Mizuki grinned wolfishly. 

"It's just you, baby face. Come with me. I'll get you home early in the morning so that your kid won't ever know you left," Mizuki said. Iruka stumbled a bit and grabbed Mizuki to stabilize himself.

"I don't…I don't want to…to fuck, okay?" Mizuki was a bit surprised. In the past, alcohol had always made Iruka horny. He'd gotten his hopes up.

"We'll just sleep," Mizuki replied. Deciding Iruka was going to take forever if he walked on his own, Mizuki scooped the inebriated man up into his arms and carried him quickly to his place. Once inside, he sat Iruka on the bed. Iruka stared up at him lovingly. "Are you still hot?" Mizuki asked slyly. Iruka blinked, then his face flushed. He nodded. Mizuki smirked, nudging Iruka's knees apart so that he stood between them. Gently, he pulled at Iruka's hair tie until the long locks fell around his shoulders. His thick, mahogany colored hair had always delighted Mizuki. Running his fingers through it had been Mizuki's favorite hobby, once upon a time. With a contemplative look on his face, Mizuki examined Iruka, flushed and drunk beneath him.

"Take off your shirt. You'll cool down that way," Mizuki instructed. Iruka nodded trustingly and raised his arms to let Mizuki undress him. "Lay back, baby face," Mizuki said. Iruka wet his lips with his tongue, obviously confused and troubled about something, but he was too drunk to remember. Mizuki pushed his shoulder gently, and that decided the matter. Iruka fell backwards with a gentle thump. His slender torso was no longer boyish, as Mizuki remembered it being.

Baby face had done some growing, Mizuki realized with a smirk. He unbuttoned Iruka's threadbare jeans and slid the zipper down. They were ripped at the knee, but they looked hot on him. Iruka scratched his chest and groaned. He covered his mouth with his arm.

"Are you going to be sick, baby?" Mizuki asked, halting momentarily. Iruka mumbled something, but shook his head 'no.' Mizuki tugged Iruka's pants down, followed by his underwear. His own erection was demanding some attention. Iruka tensed underneath him, the muscles in his legs straining as Iruka wiggled against the cool sheets. He moved his arm away and his expression was one of pleasure. He spread his arms wide and slid them over the sheets, as if he were making an angel in the snow.

"So cool…feels good…" Iruka mumbled. His eyes were barely open, and Mizuki was fairly positive he didn't know where he was or what was going on.

"Iruka, baby?" Mizuki asked, a smile twisting his face unpleasantly. The brunette blinked in his general direction. Good enough. He wasn't unconscious, so he was fair game. Besides, Iruka wouldn't know that he hadn't agreed. Mizuki would be surprised if he remembered his own name when he woke up, much less what their conversation had been.

Mizuki would tell him that he begged for it – just like he had done when he was fifteen. Iruka begged so prettily. The memory made him impossibly harder. Mizuki undid his own pants and stepped out of them, and then tugged his shirt off quickly. He spat onto his hand and moistened his dick. Iruka was an old friend, after all. He deserved that much, at least.

Mizuki pinned Iruka with his body and was about to slide home when Iruka's eyes cleared somewhat and he began to struggle. Mizuki cursed and cupped a hand over Iruka's mouth so he wouldn't wake the neighbors. Iruka thrashed his head from side to side, pushing against Mizuki's body weakly. 

"Shhh, baby face, shhh…" Iruka recognized the pet name and quieted almost instantly. He quit struggling and simply stared at the ceiling vacantly as he was thrust into. The bed protested, and Iruka was jolted each time Mizuki crashed against him. Mizuki grunted in pleasure and grabbed Iruka's left leg, hoisting it up over his shoulder. He changed his angle ever so slightly and Iruka gasped. The brunette's arousal began to grow as Mizuki mercilessly pounded his sweet spot. Mizuki still knew Iruka's body almost better than he knew his own, even after so many years had passed.

Still, he had acted too late. He came powerfully into Iruka and the smaller man was still unfulfilled. Mizuki pulled out carefully and replaced his spent dick with his fingers. As Mizuki watched Iruka's lips gasp for air and his eyes close in pleasure, his desires darkened. Iruka hadn't been his for a long time, and he'd taken other lovers – many of them.

Call him irrationally jealous, but it made Mizuki angry. It made him want to teach Iruka a lesson. Two fingers turned into three, three turned into four, and four turned into fisting him up to his forearm. Still, he pumped Iruka's arousal to distract him from the pain. He didn't want Iruka to feel it now – he wanted him to feel it later. Preferably when this new guy that was interested in his baby face was watching Iruka try to walk normally and failing miserably.

Finally, Iruka came with a pained moan. Mizuki extracted his fist and went to clean himself up. He returned after he'd taken a shower to clean Iruka. His lover hadn't moved, but he was bleeding on the sheets. Mizuki toweled him off, but was growing tired and didn't feel like doing the job properly. Ignoring Iruka, who was acting as if he were sleeping with his eyes open, Mizuki left him and went to sleep on the couch.

When Iruka woke up his entire body hurt. He was in a strange bed and he was naked. For a few disorienting moments he thought he'd been whoring himself again. It certainly wasn't the first time he'd woken up in such a position.

But it was bad. He could hardly move. The only person who had ever fucked him so hard was…Mizuki. 

And he remembered. Drinking…dancing…kissing…

Had he protested? He couldn't remember. Judging by his memory, it was doubtful. He'd acted as if he were seventeen again last night – as if he didn't have a son or responsibilities. Iruka wondered if his parents could see him, wherever they were, and the feelings of shame made him turn to the side and violently throw up.

"Oh, you're awake," Mizuki's voice said. "I was just coming to clean you up."

Iruka thought he was crying, but he touched his cheek weakly and realized his eyes were dry. He still could not cry. He threw up some more, instead.

"Looks like we had too much fun last night. I made you bleed."

"Bastard," Iruka spat out, but it lacked any real hatred or malice. He and Mizuki had simply been through too much for something as minor as a harsh fuck to really anger him. Besides, a little bleeding was child's play compared to what Mizuki usually liked. Mizuki had suffered, too, more than Iruka had, and when Mizuki sheltered and comforted him it came at a price.

Mizuki needed comforting, too, and Iruka couldn't complain about what comforting Mizuki entailed. He'd loved him, and pain had become irrelevant a long time ago.

"What time is it?" Iruka asked softly.

"Early. You're kid's probably not awake yet, so stop worrying. Do you want me to clean you?" Mizuki asked, a cocky smirk on his face. 

Iruka wondered why he'd been so happy to see the bastard the night before. Modestly, he covered himself up with a sheet and managed to sit up without groaning in pain. Clearly irritated, he snatched the wet towel from Mizuki.

"I've got it, thanks."

"Come on baby face, don't be like that. You were so friendly last night," Mizuki taunted, sitting beside him on the bed. Iruka rubbed his eye with the heel of his hand.

"I'm too old to be doing this stupid shit. I have a son. I can't believe I got drunk last night," Iruka moaned. Mizuki laughed.

"You were wasted. From what I heard, you needed it," Mizuki commented. 

"I didn't need it. I'm not an alcoholic anymore, and last night was a mistake."

Mizuki chuckled.

"Iruka, you grew up into a grouchy old man. You were fun last night, so don't be such a stick in the mud. I've seen you do things decent people can't even imagine. Quit acting like such a prude." Iruka sighed. 

"Quit teasing me, Mizuki. I'm not your teenage fuck toy anymore. I have a –"

"You have a son now. I _know_. You've only mentioned it fifty times or so," Mizuki groused. Then he grinned. "And I teach children. Isn't that a scary thought? I guess it's inevitable that some guys like us live long enough to fuck up the next generation."

Warily, Iruka rubbed his face.

"Don't talk like that. I'm still hopeful I might quit acting like stupid prick someday," Iruka replied. Despite everything, it was good to banter with Mizuki again. Their relationship was strange, dysfunctional, and unhealthy…but Iruka knew that no matter how flawed Mizuki was, he was special. He never kept a promise, he lied about everything, and sometimes he acted like he didn't have any emotions, but Iruka knew that deep inside Mizuki was a kid that had been hurt and rejected too many times.

So Iruka loved him. He'd promised him that a long time ago, and time didn't change that, no matter what Mizuki did to him.

He probably had protested last night. No way he could have been so far gone that he'd agreed to being fisted. Iruka sighed. Next to him, Mizuki leaned against his shoulder and stuck his tongue out at him. Iruka snorted.

"I vowed to give up sex," Iruka said. Mizuki tried to keep a straight face for about two seconds. 

"That's…funny…in a sad kind of way. You play the victim, but you're a slut, baby face. Don't lie to yourself," Mizuki replied. Iruka tilted his head from side to side, trying to pop his neck.

"Maybe I used to be. You try having sex every night with fat, old men and see if you still want it."

"But you want it with me, right? I mean, now that you're in Konoha…"

"Oh, please, don't you start, too," Iruka pleaded. Mizuki scrunched his nose up at the foul smelling sheets. 

"You know I'm special. I'm not just some random ninja that had to pay you to get into your pants." Iruka snorted at Mizuki's description of Kakashi.

"No, you had to booze me up and rape me."

Mizuki nipped his shoulder playfully. 

"Rape is such a strong word." Iruka couldn't help but laugh. What a mess his life had become. It was either laugh or cry. "You need to clean up. You stink. I have to get this place looking decent again before noon."

"Why?" Iruka asked, half-afraid to hear the answer. Mizuki grinned the grin that told Iruka he'd been misbehaving.

"My fiancé, Tsubaki, is coming over," Mizuki said. Iruka sighed.

"Why didn't I see that one coming? You think I'd learn my lesson, huh? Does this poor girl love you?" Iruka asked. Mizuki shrugged. 

"Probably. She doesn't understand me like you do. No one does, no one ever will."

Dryly, Iruka replied, "I'm touched. Forgive me for not getting emotional, but my ass is bleeding and I'm pissed off." Iruka shifted and winced. Walking was going to be a bitch. Mizuki stood up, hands on his hips.

"Are you judging me?" Mizuki asked harshly. Iruka winced again, for a different reason.

"Maybe someone needs to, Mizuki. Don't you even care that you've cheated on this girl? That you used me to do it when I didn't know about her?"

"Fuck you, Iruka. You know I'd leave her if only you said the words. You're not a kid anymore. Didn't I say I couldn't be with you until you grew up and figured out who you were without me?"

"Don't give a noble reason for cowardly behavior. You cheated on me and got a girl pregnant. She killed herself, in case you were wondering. Knowing you, you probably weren't," Iruka spat harshly. Mizuki scowled and ran a hand through his hair.

"So I fucked up – badly. You know you're the only person I've ever cared about. You're the only person who knows me. The girls are just distractions. I can't fuck them. They can't give me what I need. Being a shinobi gives me an outlet, but sometimes it's not enough," Mizuki said. Iruka remained quiet.

"You're so violent, Mizuki – so filled with hatred about things you can't change. I know there's something inside you that's still pure. I know there is." Iruka's eyes narrowed thoughtfully, and he tilted his head to the side absently. "I'm seriously starting to think I must have some kind of mental problem that makes me gravitate towards people that are emotionally fucked up. What do you think?" Iruka asked, frowning up at Mizuki. The pale haired shinobi smiled and looked down at the tired man.

"You sacrifice yourself to fix others. You've always been like that. It's why we're perfect for each other – I only know how to take, and you only know how to give."

Iruka stared at him for a moment and then smiled serenely, as if he'd finally lost his marbles.

"I need a therapist. I really do." Mizuki grinned boyishly and tugged Iruka up, ignoring his startled grunt of pain.

"No, you need a shower. Then you need to get home before your kid wakes up and wonders where daddy went."

Iruka took a shower and used the time to suppress all the emotions he couldn't handle. He thought of Naruto and his dream to be a ninja, and he thought of the loneliness in Kakashi's mismatched eyes, and knew he had to put a happy face on and keep going.

He'd promised them that he would. He pressed his head against the cold ceramic tile and an old memory flashed behind his closed eyes.  
_  
His mother leaned down and kissed him, even though he was too old for that sort of thing._

"You can't go fight that thing, Mom. It's a monster. You don't have a chance!" Iruka protested. His beautiful mother smiled sadly and tucked a lock of hair behind his ear.

"I made a promise to Konoha, and I always keep my promises. That's my way of the ninja. Be strong, Iruka, and have faith."  


Iruka opened his eyes and tried to cry. No luck.

He turned the water off and stepped out of the shower gingerly, wrapping a towel around himself. Mizuki had brought his clothes into the bathroom while he'd been showering, and he dressed himself slowly, cursing Mizuki's roughness. He emerged out of the bathroom to see the bedroom had been cleaned. There was no evidence of their dalliance.

Sighing, dreading having to put on a show for the rest of the day, Iruka made his way into the small living room. Mizuki had a nice place, he noticed without much interest. Mizuki was puttering about in the kitchen. Iruka glanced at the clock. It was almost six in the morning.

It really had been a shitty day.

"You leaving?" Mizuki asked.

"Yeah, I have to get home," Iruka replied. Mizuki glanced up from whatever he was making and flashed Iruka a familiar smile.

"Got your faith?" It was a painful reminder of the memory he'd just re-lived in the shower, but it was an old tradition between them. Iruka swallowed thickly.

"Got it. I'll…see you around."

"Yeah, see you."

And so he left, and went back home to crawl in bed with Naruto. At his front door, however, he was stopped short. Resting against the door was a bouquet of wildflowers and roses. Assuming someone had left them at the wrong door, he gingerly bent over to pick up the bouquet. Iruka unrolled the tiny scroll tied to the bouquet.

I'm sorry. What can I do to make it up to you? – Kakashi

Iruka smelled the beautiful flowers.

"This is a good start, Hatake," he muttered to himself. "But you and your lonely eyes don't know what you're getting into. I'd pity you, but it only gets me in trouble."

Sighing, Iruka carried the flowers into the apartment. Above him, sitting on the roof, Kakashi's eyes narrowed. He'd imagined countless scenarios since he left the flowers and settled down to wait for Iruka's reaction, but Iruka limping up the stairs like he'd just been fucked all night to pick up the flowers and say how much he pitied him was not exactly what he'd hoped for.

And talk about underneath the underneath! He knew the brunette was carrying some emotional baggage, but what he'd seen in the man's eyes was almost unbelievable. Kakashi had seen that look before – in the eyes of his fellow ANBU members. Kakashi didn't know a person could hide that look.

It was definitely going to take more than just a single bouquet of flowers to fix all the hurt that had been done to Iruka – both by himself and others. Kakashi jumped from the roof, already making plans.

Saturday was blessedly uneventful for Iruka. Naruto was quiet, as if he sensed his father was not feeling well, and they didn't have any interruptions until around three that afternoon. The doorbell rang.

Iruka was careful not to let any anxiety show on his face. Was it Mizuki come to tell him he'd left his girlfriend? Was it Kakashi with his lonely eyes that were so hard to resist?

Iruka opened the door to see that it was a blonde haired woman, but Iruka couldn't properly see her due to all the flowers she carried. It had to be thirteen or fourteen bouquets at the very least.

"Um…" Iruka said dumbly. She peeked over the top of the massive armload and smiled.

"Are you Iruka Umino?" she asked. Iruka nodded. The woman held out the flowers to him. Iruka didn't take them. 

"This has to be a mistake. No one would…oh no. Surely he didn't send all these," Iruka said in disbelief.

"He asked that his name not be mentioned, but he wanted me to pass on a message. He said, 'I might not know what I'm getting into, but I'm not the only one who has lonely eyes.' I'm sure it would be more romantic if I knew what it meant. All the same, he's nearly bought out our shop, so I'd say you've got a keeper." Iruka had no choice but to take the various bouquets the woman pushed into his arms.

"You can tell him -" Iruka started. He was cut off. 

"No, you can tell him. I deliver flowers. I'm not a mail service," she replied waspishly. Then, she turned and addressed someone Iruka couldn't see. "Hurry up with those, Inoichi, and you too, Ino!" Iruka barely had time to pass off the armload of bouquets to a curious Naruto before a tall man with long, blonde hair passed him another, bigger bunch. He had to put those on the floor to take the ones from the young girl who looked to be about Naruto's age.

Naruto blushed when he saw her.

"Hey! You're that boy that Sasuke-kun beat up by the ramen stand," she remarked. Naruto scowled at her.

"I didn't get beat up!" he replied, a bit petulantly.

"Yes, well, you can talk to your little friend later, Ino. We need to get back to the shop. Have a pleasant day," the woman said without much sincerity. Stunned, Iruka closed the door without replying.

"What are we going to do with all these stinky flowers? And who sent them?" Naruto asked, nudging a bouquet with the toe of his sandal as if it were a dead animal.

"I don't know. Maybe this is a Konoha custom that we don't understand." Iruka hoped the lame excuse would pacify the boy. Naruto examined the huge flower pile for a few more moments before returning to his drawing. Like most eight-year-old boys, flowers didn't interest him overly much. If Kakashi had chosen chocolates, then it might have been a different story.

For the sake of Iruka's sanity, Iruka was glad he hadn't. If he'd had to deal with Naruto hyped up on sugar for the rest of the week, Iruka probably never would have talked to the man again. Since he'd chosen flowers instead, Iruka wasn't quite sure what he'd do. 

It was the first time anyone had ever given him flowers.

A/N: Alright, so I might get reported for this chapter being very, very extreme. The problem was that I just couldn't figure out how to edit it without loosing an important clue to Iruka and Mizuki's complicated, highly twisted relationship. So, if you were offended…I guess report it. I'll just hope that you guys will be forgiving just this once!


	6. Things Fall Apart

**Chapter 6**  
_"Things Fall Apart"_

Iruka had been dreading the conversation, but it was Sunday and he had very little time left to come clean if he didn't want Naruto to find out about his new job the hard way. He asked Naruto to sit with him on the couch, and worriedly he stared at the little boy whose opinion meant so much to him.

"Naruto, I found a new job," he began. Naruto smiled at him, oblivious to what Iruka was about to say.

"That's great, Dad!"

"I'm working at your school as a…a janitor. It was the only work I could find. I'm sorry, Naruto, I know this is going to make things even -"

"Dad?" Naruto asked, gently reaching out and touching Iruka's cheek to quiet him. Iruka stopped talking, waiting for the temper tantrum, for the anger, for the embarrassment that his son would have every right to feel. "You're going to do great at your new job, but don't work too hard, okay?" Naruto said sweetly. Iruka began to shake his head. He grabbed Naruto's hand and held it in his own.

"This is going to make it hard for you at school. If you want to pretend you don't know me, it won't hurt my feelings, okay?"

Finally, Naruto began to scowl. Maybe he was just realizing how embarrassing the situation would be for him. Iruka cringed on the inside, waiting for the blow.

"Would you ever tell someone that I wasn't your son?" Naruto asked quietly, his blue eyes piercing and snapping like hungry beasts. Iruka's eyes widened.

"No, Naruto! Never! You're my little cat, my precious, precious person. But I don't expect -"

"Dad, you're my hero. I love you more than ramen," Naruto gave him a moment to let that statement sink in. "I don't care about the other kids. I want you to be happy here, too. Remember? I said so when we gave thanks."

Iruka couldn't quite form words, but he knew how he felt.

What had he done to deserve a son as precious as Naruto? The simple answer was that he didn't deserve him.

"Is that what was making you so sad?" Naruto asked, again reaching out to touch his face. He liked to do that. Iruka assumed it was comforting for him.

"That was a big part of it," Iruka agreed.

"So there's more?" Naruto asked innocently. Iruka sighed.

"I think I've said enough already, Naruto. You're still a child, but maybe when you're older I can tell you a little about what my life was like before I found you."

"It was really bad, huh?" Naruto asked. "Someone left you in a dark place?"

Iruka knew that the dark place Naruto referred to was the alley that Iruka had found him abandoned in. The roofs of the buildings above it overlapped, so it was cramped and dark and as a mere child of five, Naruto had been afraid to leave it and venture out into the streets. He would have stayed in the alley until he starved if Iruka and that homeless man hadn't found him.

Was he in a dark place? He had left behind a lot of his problems when they moved, but had he brought that dark place with him? Naruto's big, blue eyes stared up at him – angel eyes, Iruka had always thought.

"I'm in a dark place, but I can see some light," Iruka ruffled Naruto's hair. "Have I ever told you what beautiful eyes you have, Naruto? Some girl is going to love staring at them some day. They make everything look so bright." Naruto pouted.

"Girls are stupid!" Iruka smiled, a real smile that he didn't have to fake.

"I had a good friend that was a girl when I was your age. She lived with me at the orphanage," Iruka said. Naruto seemed to consider it.

"Maybe your friend wasn't stupid, but the other ones are. What was your friend like?"

"Reiko? Oh, she was smart, but no one really noticed because she had a crush on a boy that was older than her, and she was always doing silly things to get his attention. Some of the other kids didn't like her, but I knew she was very special. She really loved her friends, you know? That's rare."

"Did you like-like her?" Naruto asked, a teasing grin on his face. Iruka snorted.

"Like-like?" Iruka asked.

"Yeah, you know, you can like a person or you can like-like a person. But I bet you didn't, because you were tough when you were a kid. None of that girly stuff."

Iruka wondered if Naruto's imagination was a little too creative sometimes. The things he came up with…

"I loved Reiko as a friend. It isn't girly to love a friend, Naruto. Reiko was funny and always tried her best, even though she didn't always do well."

Naruto made a thinking noise. "Maybe I'll marry her someday. If I ever get around to it…" Naruto trailed off, peeking up at Iruka to gauge his reaction. Iruka kept smiling, but he remembered that night he'd seen Reiko with Junpei. She was probably dead or broken.

"I think you'd be a little young for Reiko's tastes," Iruka replied, still smiling in that fake way he'd mastered a long time ago. Iruka glanced over the back of the couch and out the small window. A few birds flew by, against a backdrop of fluffy clouds.

"Would you like to go for a walk, Naruto? It's a pretty day outside," Iruka suggested. His son had been playing in the kitchen all morning while he did some reading on the couch, and Iruka could tell he was getting a little antsy. The blonde nodded, but headed towards the kitchen to pick up a drawing he'd been working on.

"Can I finish my picture first?" Naruto asked. His tone of voice was strange, and Iruka looked at him sharply. Naruto stood very still with his back towards Iruka, waiting for permission. A chill shot up Iruka's spine, and he shivered a bit.

That was weird.

"Of course…what's your picture of, Naruto?" Iruka asked, standing up and slowly walking towards his son to look over his shoulder at the drawings he'd been doing on the kitchen floor.

They were violent – black and red and full of anger. Iruka gasped. He hadn't seen Naruto draw pictures like that since he'd first taken him in, when Iruka thought that drawing might help Naruto express his feelings.

"They're red drawings." His voice sounded strange – gravelly almost – and Iruka worriedly grabbed his son's shoulder and turned him around, snapping him out of whatever strange funk he was in.

He had not turned him too late to see a tinge of red in the boy's eyes, slowly seeping back into blue. Iruka swallowed thickly.

"These…pictures. You haven't drawn these in awhile, Naruto." The boy blinked at him confusedly.

"It's just a picture of our…house," Naruto said slowly, as he looked down and saw that he hadn't been drawing a picture of their house at all. He took a step away from the pictures, as if they frightened him. Iruka didn't blame him. "I didn't draw those, Dad. I didn't draw those! Did you draw those?" Naruto asked, beginning to get panicky. Iruka turned Naruto away from the pictures and picked him up, even if he was really too heavy to be carried.

"Calm down, Naruto. You're getting upset." Over Naruto's shoulder, Iruka stared down at the violent red gashes drawn all over the paper. "You just forgot yourself for a little while. It's okay." He'd thought for sure that Naruto was better. Naruto had stopped spacing out, stopped loosing his memory, and he had stopped drawing such violent pictures.

Iruka felt helpless, just like he had felt last night. He hated feeling helpless.

In his arms, Naruto began to cry – big fat tears that soaked Iruka's shoulder. Iruka rubbed his back and finally moved to the couch with him, holding him while he had his fit. He rocked him for hours it seemed. Naruto was muttering, but Iruka could not understand him. Tirelessly, Iruka rocked him and comforted him.

"I love you, little cat, I love you, calm down, little cat," Iruka soothed. His voice was going hoarse.

Such scenes had been common in their house three years ago, but they had slowly stopped and Iruka had forgotten how heartbreaking they were…and how frightening.

Finally, Naruto was calm again and exhausted. Gently, Iruka laid him on the couch and tucked a blanket around him. He looked so small.

There was a soft knock on the door. Cursing under his breath, because he was really in no mood to have any visitors – especially the Mizuki/Kakashi variety, he went to the door. He opened it quietly.

It was Kakashi.

"What's wrong?" Kakashi immediately asked, his happy expression disappearing in an instant. He had a big basket of vegetables in his hands.

Iruka spaced out as he stared at the vegetables and his thoughts rambled for a moment.

_'Kakashi is a ninja, so he should know about trauma. Maybe he'll know what I should do for Naruto,'_ Iruka thought. He looked up at Kakashi's worried face slowly, as if debating with himself about something.

"Stay there," he said quickly, before shutting the door. Kakashi took a few steps backwards and looked down at the vegetable basket.

Iruka opened the door again and slipped out, clutching something in his hand. He was dressed in ratty old sweatpants that were ripped on one leg, and a white t-shirt that was covered in snot and tears. Something had happened with Naruto. Kakashi absently set the basket down and stuck his hands in his pockets, waiting to hear what was wrong.

"I don't know if Naruto's told you anything about how I found him, but he had these fits for a long time where he'd throw things and try to hurt himself. He couldn't explain what was bothering him. No one had ever really taught him to speak. So I had him do drawings. They looked like these," Iruka flipped the papers over and showed him the angry red gashes. They looked like wounds. "Naruto hasn't drawn pictures like this in a long time. Years ago, he would blank out and couldn't remember what he'd been doing." Iruka wandered away, clutching the papers almost fearfully. "There was a bird… we found him. He had a broken wing, so we took him home. I don't know what happened… but I came home one night and the bird was dead. Someone…_Naruto_…had strangled it. I didn't know what to do, but I didn't have any help so I just comforted him and made him draw – all the time. Things got better, I thought, but he had another fit today, and he drew this. I can't send him to school like this. He's sick. He could hurt someone and not even mean it. There used to be times when he got upset and couldn't control himself. He'd hit me over and over – fighting me tooth and nail."

Kakashi was quiet for a long moment and then said, "You were stupid for enrolling him at the Academy, then. You knew he wasn't mentally sound. What were you thinking?" Iruka seemed to shrink in front of him, and Kakashi instantly regretted how harsh he'd sounded. Iruka clutched the angry drawings so hard that the edges crumpled up in his hands.

"It was the only thing I could tell him that gave him hope! He didn't start improving until I started telling him about my parents being ninja. At the time, I thought it was my parents looking after me in a way. It was so hard to deal with him – I was in way over my head – and then, miraculously, talking about my parents calmed him down. He wanted to know everything about ninja. He became obsessed. Coming to the Academy was his dream, and he worked hard to get past all the bad things he did. I thought he was better."

Kakashi took the drawings, staring at them intently.

"These aren't normal drawings," he said. Iruka shot him a look as if to say, 'Really? No shit.' Noting the look, Kakashi scowled. "I mean to say that there's chakra all over them."

"Chakra?" Iruka repeated confused. He had never attended the ninja Academy – his parents had wanted him to do something safer – so the concept of chakra was fuzzy to him.

"Yes. It's invisible energy that ninja can transfer into things. These drawings are filled with it – more than a boy like Naruto should be able to put out, especially one who is untrained."

Kakashi pushed up his forehead protector and studied the drawings with his Sharingan. The pictures glowed red with a demonic chakra he'd only sensed once before in his lifetime.

"How does Naruto know about the fox demon? He shouldn't have even been born yet," Kakashi asked sharply. Iruka froze. Something inside him knew, even though he didn't want to admit it.

Those strange whisker markings on his cheeks, and the tribal looking tattoo on his belly that faintly appeared when he got angry…

Iruka shook his head in denial. "Naruto's just strong. He's had to be, to survive what he's been through. He's just a normal boy."

"I don't think he is, and I think you know why, too, Iruka. Did you know that the fox demon was defeated by being sealed inside a human baby?" Iruka blanched. "No one knows what happened to that baby, Iruka."

"That's horrible! What monster would do that to an innocent child?" Iruka's expression turned ferocious. "What monster would do that to my son?" he asked darkly, his eyes snapping with anger.

"He was not a monster. He was my teacher. The demon was killing everyone – it had to be stopped."

"So my child paid the price?" Iruka clarified. "The monster that killed my parents is…is…inside my son?"

Kakashi felt sorry, unbelievably sorry, for the man standing in front of him. Life had been cruel to Umino Iruka. He folded the drawings and tucked them into his flak jacket. Wordlessly, he closed the distance between them and wrapped the other man up in his arms. Iruka clung to him tightly, as if Kakashi was his lifeline and he was drowning.

Then, seemingly out of nowhere, Iruka looked up at him and squeezed his arms painfully tight. Kakashi was sure his nails were drawing blood.

"Promise me, promise me, Kakashi, and give me your word, your vow, that you won't tell _anyone_. If he found out…"

"Naruto would –"

"Don't presume to tell me how my son would act. I think I know him a little better than you do, and Naruto isn't the person I'm worried about. There's more to this than you understand, and I'm telling you now that if people find out about this, what happens is going to be your fault, and I'll never forgive you for that. Do you understand? I won't loose Naruto because of this. I won't. Promise me!"

"Iruka, I don't –"

"Promise!" Iruka half-roared, shaking him harshly. When Kakashi remained silent, his expression unreadable, Iruka began to cry. It wasn't much at first, but soon he was sobbing so hard that he couldn't stand. He slid down against the wall behind him and grieved for his son that had a monster in his belly. His mind raced through all kinds of horrific outcomes that could happen when the villagers found out.

Choosing the worst possible timing, Mizuki came up the stairs. Confused, he shot a glare at Kakashi and then moved to Iruka's side.

"Baby face, what's wrong? What happened?" Mizuki's fingers went automatically towards Iruka's hair, but Kakashi's bored sounding voice stopped him.

"Don't touch him," Kakashi said, as if he was merely commenting on the weather. Mizuki glared at him hatefully and flipped him the bird.

"I don't care if you're a Jounin. Fuck off. I'm going to make you eat shit if you've hurt him." Mizuki wrapped his arm around Iruka, as if to pull him into a hug.

And that was how Mizuki ended up dangling off the side of the building with a hand clenched mercilessly around his throat. Through his sobbing, Iruka looked up and realized what was going on.

"STOP IT! STOP IT NOW!" Iruka shouted. His next door neighbor opened his door as if to yell at them for the noise, saw the scene being played out, and shut his door firmly again. Iruka's own door opened, and Naruto looked out curiously, rubbing his eyes.

"Kakashi-sensei?" he asked. "What are you doing?"

Mizuki began to make choking noises. Using more control than he felt like he had at the moment, Kakashi drug the man back over the rail and set him down.

His eye crinkled happily.

"We were playing a ninja game," he replied. The blonde boy looked at his father, slumped against the wall again and sobbing, trying to stop the tears with his arms. He saw the spilled basket of vegetables. It upset him.

"What did you do to my dad?" he asked, pointing accusingly at Mizuki. The pale haired man shook his head, but was too out of breath to deny anything.

"Naruto, I want you to pack an overnight bag for you and Iruka. Do it now," Kakashi said. Naruto hesitated, and studied the scene one last time before running inside the house and slamming the door behind him. Kakashi turned to Mizuki, who scowled at him hatefully. He was finally getting his voice back. "As for you, I don't know who you are, but you'd be wise to –"

"I've known Iruka since we were seven. How long have you known him? Better yet, how much did you have to pay before he let you fuck him? I always got him for free," Mizuki taunted with an arrogant smirk. Kakashi saw red. His mind supplied a million different ways to kill the scum who had (obviously) been the lover that had been so rough with Iruka the night before.

"Both of you…stop it. Please, just _stop_ it. Now is not the time. Go home, Mizuki," Iruka begged, tears still running in twin streams from his eyes. Mizuki stood, so that he towered over Iruka's small, slouched form.

"Are you choosing him over me because of Tsubaki? I told you she's just some girl that I –"

"Shut the FUCK up, Mizuki! Do I look like I care about your damn tramp right now?" Iruka rose to his feet, pushing Mizuki roughly in the chest. "Get the hell away from me, and I fucking mean it!"

"What the hell has gotten into you, Iruka?!" Mizuki asked incredulously. Kakashi, now more curious than angry (Iruka had chosen him over Mizuki, after all), waited to hear Iruka's reply.

"I…I…I'm with Kakashi now, okay? So just leave. Please," he begged. Mizuki was about to call Iruka on his lie, because it was obvious Iruka was lying, but just then the door opened and Naruto came out clutching a hastily packed bag.

"You heard him. Leave before I make you leave," Kakashi threatened. Naruto moved to his father's side, reaching for his hand.

For the first time ever, his father flinched when he touched him. Naruto held his hand more firmly and stared up at him.

"Daddy, what's going on?" he asked helplessly. Iruka didn't reply. He was watching Mizuki jump away by rooftop. "Daddy? Please say something! Why did you flinch? Dad, what's wrong? What's going on?"

"Naruto, hush. I'll answer your questions later. Hold onto your dad tightly," Kakashi instructed. Bewildered, Naruto grabbed Iruka's leg in a tight hug. Numbly, Iruka looked down at his big blue eyes full of questions. Then there was smoke, and then Kakashi teleported them away.

Iruka studied Kakashi's living room vacantly, wondering how he'd gotten there. Naruto let go of his leg – when had he grabbed it? – and the boy was staring up at him.

Iruka smiled at him, but it looked more like a grimace. Kakashi swept him off his feet and, startled, Iruka grabbed onto his neck.

"Naruto, you're dad isn't feeling well. I'm going to put him to bed."

Iruka didn't protest. He wasn't feeling well at all. He was shocked and terrified. Kakashi put him onto the large bed and pulled a blanket over him.

"Wait here. I'll only be a second." Kakashi returned to the living room were Naruto was simply standing, his blue eyes narrowed and his mouth drawn into a taut line.

"Naruto, your dad needs some rest. Come with me," Kakashi ordered. They left the apartment and Kakashi walked to the door next to his own. He knocked and waited.

When it swung open, a man dressed entirely in green spandex stood on the other side.

"Kakashi! My hip and modern –"

"Not now, Gai. I need a favor. This is Naruto. I know you just got back from an A-class, but can you take him to the training grounds and wear him down? He needs practice on the basics – lots and lots of practice. He's entering the Academy tomorrow and he's only had one training session with me."

"You've taken on a pupil?" Gai asked, obviously surprised. He looked at Naruto, as if sizing him up. Naruto didn't smile, as he usually would have. He was upset and confused.

"Yes. Will you train him until he wears out?"

"I would be honored to teach your promising pupil! Come on, Naruto! Let us go train!" Gai announced loudly, shutting his door behind him and beaming down at Naruto with impossibly white teeth. The blonde boy looked at Kakashi as if his teacher had lost his mind.

"Go with him, Naruto. He's a friend of mine," Kakashi said. Gai broke into manly tears.

"I've never heard you say –"

"Just take him, Gai. I owe you one."

Gai stared down at the short boy. What potential did Kakashi see in him?

"We will start with 100 laps around Konoha!" Gai said, just to gauge the boy's reaction. He merely stared at Kakashi's closed front door, clearly distracted. "Make that 150 laps, as punishment for not focusing!" Gai boomed.

Naruto finally looked at him. He narrowed his eyes and stuck his chin out.

"Why only 150? Is that all you got in you, old man?" Naruto asked rudely. Gai, however, merely laughed.

"You aspire to be my rival as well! I am impressed with your competitive SPIRIT! Let us start our laps!" Gai took off jogging, Naruto following closely on his heels with a sigh. He was worried about his dad, and he didn't feel like exercising at the moment.

Kakashi returned to Iruka's beside.

"Where's Naruto?" Iruka asked. Kakashi sat down on the edge of the bed, but he didn't touch Iruka.

"I found him a babysitter for the afternoon. He'll have fun, so don't worry about him," Kakashi reassured. "You can just rest for the afternoon. I won't let anyone bother you."

Iruka looked up at him sadly.

"What do you want in return?" he asked. Kakashi shook his head.

"I don't want anything. I just want you to calm down and rest. I'm sorry I lost control and made you upset. There's something about you that trips me up. You're a strange one, Umino Iruka," Kakashi mused with a small smile. Iruka snorted mirthlessly.

"I'm not the strange one. You read porno in public and sent me sixty bouquets of flowers." Kakashi grinned underneath his mask.

"You said it yourself – one was just a good start. I had to do better than that."

"I didn't mean I wanted more flowers, and you know it. Besides, you shouldn't listen to people muttering when they think they're alone," Iruka scolded. Kakashi tucked a lock of Iruka's hair back in place behind his ear. As if the action reminded him, Iruka sat up and pulled the tie out, shaking his hair a bit and running his fingers through it to remove the major tangles. He tugged his shirt off.

"Can I borrow one of yours? This one's dirty," Iruka explained innocently. Kakashi, meanwhile, was trying to recover from the sexy way Iruka had just flipped his long hair and then pulled his shirt off. "Kakashi? Hello? You in there?" Iruka asked tiredly.

"Oh! Um…hold on a second." Kakashi moved to his wardrobe and pulled out a black ANBU tank top that had gotten too small for him a long time ago. It would probably be tight on Iruka, too. "I outgrew that awhile ago. It should fit you," Kakashi said. Iruka tugged the top on and smoothed it down.

It was deliciously tight. With his soft hair hanging down around his shoulders, dressed in Kakashi's old tank top, looking so vulnerable…he was simply gorgeous. His face was still puffy though, and Kakashi remembered what the man had just been through.

"Do you…want to talk about it? I can go ensure that Mizuki leaves you alone permanently, if you'd like," Kakashi asked awkwardly, returning to sit on the bed. Iruka stared at him for a few moments and then something changed in his eyes. He leaned forward, tugged Kakashi's mask down, and kissed him. When the kiss ended, Iruka remained close to his face, staring at him thoughtfully.

"You're a good person, aren't you? You try to act like you've seen it all, but you're pure – really pure. You're strong in that respect and you know right from wrong, don't you?" Iruka asked softly.

"I wouldn't say that," Kakashi replied, resisting the urge to blush. The look Iruka was giving him had suddenly turned smoldering. The look went straight to his cock.

"When I was young, everyone said I was a tease," Iruka confessed, still not smiling but his eyes! It was like they were hooking him, drawing him closer, hypnotizing him.

"I don't think…you're like that," Kakashi forced out. Iruka grinned, slowly, playfully.

"Do you think I need someone to take care of me?" Iruka asked in a voice that was practically a purr. His face was tilted up and his voice was almost childish in its softness. Everything about him begged to be kissed and reassured. Kakashi tried to kiss him – their lips were so close! – but Iruka leaned back ever so slightly and licked his lips instead. "Is that what you think?" he asked again. Kakashi wasn't really paying attention to what he was saying – his mind was on that darting, pink tongue.

"I…I think…you need someone to…take care of you," Kakashi agreed, hoping it would be the answer that would earn him another kiss. Iruka's hands slid up his chest in a sensual, caressing way. Iruka worried his bottom lip with his teeth, looking up through his lashes at Kakashi. "Then it's obvious you don't know me. I've been taking care of myself for a long, long time. I've taken care of tougher men than you, sweetheart." Iruka's playful expression was gone instantly, and Kakashi snapped back to awareness. Iruka held his own kunai against his throat.

He hadn't even noticed.

"So don't ever dangle one of my friends off of a building, because you don't know me, you don't know where I've been, and you _really_ don't know what you're getting tangled up with. Bad luck follows me like I'm cursed, and just being my friend is going to invite more problems into your life than you can handle. Maybe I could have been the kind of lover you want a long time ago – before I met Mizuki, before everything became so _amazingly_ fucked," Iruka lowered the kunai, and gently brushed his thumb over the skin he'd almost cut with it, "But I'm damaged goods now. Use me as a friend when you're lonely, if you need that, but this – whatever this is," Iruka dropped his hand and cupped Kakashi's erection, "needs to stop, before I drag you down with me. Do you understand? These problems with Naruto and Mizuki – it's just going to get worse before it gets better."

Angrily, Kakashi pushed Iruka's hand away and got right in his face. There was no flash of fear in the brunette's eyes.

"Don't patronize me, Iruka. So you reeled me in. Whatever it is about you that makes you so damn addictive works on me, too, and on hundreds of other men as well, I'm sure. But I'm not like them. If I wanted you to love me, Iruka, I could make you love me. I'm not going to let some whore control me. Don't think so highly of yourself just because you've got a cute ass." Iruka glared at him, about to slap him again, but Kakashi caught his hand. "No, I don't think you'll be doing that anymore."

"You can't make me love you, Hatake. I don't care how many flowers you buy me," Iruka retorted maliciously. Kakashi only laughed at him.

"Then why did you ask Mizuki to leave instead of me?" Iruka's eyes narrowed.

"Because Mizuki's parents were killed by the fox demon as well, and unlike me, he's never gotten over it. If he knew Naruto had the demon inside him, he'd go psycho. I wanted him to leave before you blurted it out and Mizuki killed my kid!" Iruka snorted mirthlessly. "What? Did you think it was because I had a crush on you? Please."

"Then why did you tell him you were with me?" Kakashi asked. He was starting to sound more confused than cocky. Iruka tugged his hand out of Kakashi's hold and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Because Mizuki's a coward, and you're stronger than he is. Until Naruto stops having fits, I have to keep Mizuki away from him. Mizuki's not stupid. He'll figure it out just like you did. His purpose in life is to kill the monster that killed his family. It's the only thing that he really cares about – even more than he cares about me."

"He hurt you last night. He wouldn't have treated you that way if he really cared about you at all. I would never treat you that way," Kakashi replied, feeling stupid and bewildered. Just when he thought he'd gained the upper hand, Iruka threw him for a loop.

The brunette's gaze softened, and he pushed away Kakashi's forehead protector. The Sharingan started spinning wildly. Iruka shook his head.

"I feel like I'm looking into a mirror when I look at your eyes. It's strange and it makes me sad," Iruka said, tugging the forehead protector back in place. "Mizuki…how do I even begin to explain Mizuki to you? He's always hurt me. I don't think he's ever kept a promise that he's made to me."

"Then why? Why love him? It doesn't make any sense!" Kakashi replied, gripping Iruka's shoulder as if he wanted to shake some sense into him. Iruka smiled sadly at him.

"I didn't understand why I loved him either, until I started raising Naruto. I love Mizuki like a parent loves their child. It's unconditional. Just because people are bad – terrible even – do you think it means that they don't deserve to be loved? Those are the people who need love most. Mizuki was my friend, my best friend. I can't ever turn my back on him, just like I could never turn my back on Naruto. No matter what he does, or how he hurts me, the Mizuki I used to know a long time ago is still somewhere deep inside of him. My friend is in there somewhere – under all the pain and anger. I catch glimpses of him sometimes, but then he gets buried again. If I gave up on Mizuki, he'd have no one. If he needs me, I have to be there, because I promised him that a long time ago. Everyone deserves at least someone in their life that loves them like that, and I would have still been with him all these years, but _he_ decided to leave _me_ – it wasn't my choice," Iruka tried to explain.

Kakashi, however, was overwhelmed with frustration.

"So who loves _you_ like that?" he asked, his eyes narrowed. Iruka shook his head and frowned.

"No one does, sweetheart, and that's why you and I have the same eyes. Do you understand now? I wish I could love you, Kakashi, and make that look go away, because I know what you're feeling and I know how much it hurts, but I just don't have anything left to give to you. Naruto takes up so much of my energy – even if Mizuki hadn't come back into my life, giving Naruto the attention he needs is a full time job. Now that Mizuki needs me again, too…there won't be anything left. I'm spread thin as it is, and I'm barely holding Naruto and I together."

Kakashi was quiet, and upset, and he stared at Iruka for a long time.

"I want to help you. Why can't I try to love you like you…like you love Mizuki? I don't want to see you break." Iruka merely shrugged.

"I don't know if you can. No one's ever tried before, aside from my parents. Love takes a long time. Right now you're in lust, Kakashi. It isn't love. You think I'm a stupid whore who's beneath you, and don't deny it because I know that's how you feel. Despite how hard you're trying, you slip up every once in awhile and show what's underneath all that charm." Kakashi couldn't deny that. Iruka had never let on that he knew, though.

"Maybe I thought like that –"

"Still _think_ that," Iruka corrected with a smile. Kakashi flashed him a guilty look and glanced away.

"Maybe I do think that on some level, but it's become more than just wanting sex. I was celibate for a long time before I found you, and I would go back to that if I really thought you were beneath me. You're not. There's more to you than I realized," Kakashi replied.

"It was funny watching you try to get to me through Naruto," Iruka commented absently, falling backwards onto the pillows. "You wanted to strangle him," Iruka said with a smirk. Kakashi wished he could hide behind his mask, but it was down and he felt particularly vulnerable without it. How had someone like Iruka seen through him – a shinobi trained to be manipulative and subtle? "And now, it's funny watching you realize that you're not as mysterious as you think you are," Iruka said, his smile broadening.

"Okay, stop it. You're intuitive and you understand how I think. You've made your point," Kakashi snapped. Iruka chuckled.

"Alright then, as long as I made my point." Iruka crossed his arms behind his head and stared at Kakashi curiously. "So you really want to love me, knowing I can't love you back? Knowing I'll never want to have sex with you?"

Did Kakashi want that?

"Because if you want to back out, you can. I won't think any less of you. You could find some sweet guy that would worship you in all your legendary glory. I'm sure Mizuki, you and myself aren't the only gay guys in Konoha."

"I probably could," Kakashi mused. He almost didn't catch it, but there was a flash of disappointment in Iruka's eyes. Still, Iruka kept talking.

"It will be hard for you, seeing me love Mizuki. I usually never say no to him when he wants sex, and it's never pretty. I come out of it looking like hell. You're possessive. It's going to bother you."

Kakashi glared at him, but didn't respond.

"And what about Naruto? You don't like him. He irritates you. If you spend all your time hanging around me, it means you'll be hanging around him, too."

"Are you trying to convince me not to fall for you?" Kakashi cut him off. Iruka frowned up at him.

"It would be easier on you. Don't you wish you could go back to living the way you did before you met me?" Iruka asked. Kakashi ignored Iruka's attempts to squirm away and stole a kiss from him.

"I know it's crazy, but I don't think I do. I like what's underneath your underneath," he said simply, leering at the tight tank top stretched over Iruka's torso.

"You're just a big pervert!" Iruka snorted, "And I actually believed you were being romantic for a second," he said. Kakashi grinned.

"You've got to be tired. Take a nap. I'll make us some dinner."

"When will Naruto be back?" Iruka asked, already settling down into the pillows.

"I told Gai to train him until he wore him out. They should be back sometime tonight."

"I hope you know I see through all these attempts to get rid of my kid so you can try to seduce me. It's really pathetic of you, actually," Iruka mumbled, just as he closed his eyes and a huge yawn slipped out. Kakashi's grin faded and he watched Iruka for a few moments. Not knowing what compelled him, he leaned over and kissed Iruka's temple.

"You're really cute like that – even with tears all over your face." Iruka didn't respond. He was already fast asleep.

* * *

**A/N:** So a little more insight into Naruto, and Kakashi almost killed Mizuki. That's happy, right? Thanks for the reviews, guys! 


	7. Second Impressions

**Chapter 7**  
_"Second Impressions"_

Kakashi woke Iruka up around seven, with dinner already set on the table. Naruto had still not returned. Iruka opened his eyes and took a moment to find his bearings.

"Did…did Mizuki try to come by?" Iruka asked hesitantly. Kakashi tried not to scowl at the mention of the man and shook his head.

"No. Do you want some dinner?" Kakashi asked, attempting to change the subject. Iruka yawned and nodded, sitting up in bed. In what was becoming a habit, Kakashi tucked his hair behind his ears. "Have you always had such long hair?" he asked. He had decided while Iruka had been sleeping that he would give himself two missions. The first was that he would discover everything there was to know about Iruka, and the second was that he would show Iruka how he deserved to be treated. Surely, it wouldn't take long before Iruka realized Mizuki was not his child and was inadequate as a lover.

He just had to have faith.

"My mother liked me to wear it long, and so did a friend of mine once I was older," Iruka replied.

"Who was the friend?" Kakashi asked. Iruka looked a little surprised at his questions, but answered him anyway.

"Her name was Aiya. Would you like to know her shoe size, too?" Iruka asked teasingly. Kakashi merely smiled mysteriously and didn't explain his curiosity. He stood so that Iruka could get out of bed. He led him into the kitchen and pulled out his chair for him. Iruka stared at him like he'd grown a second head. Eventually, he sat.

"Err…this looks good, Kakashi," he complimented. Kakashi smiled happily. He'd put a lot of work into the meal. "Naruto still hasn't come back?" Iruka asked, a bit worriedly. Kakashi shook his head.

"He's still training, but he's in good hands." Kakashi picked up his chopsticks. Iruka did the same, and was about to dig in, but Kakashi stopped him with a look.

"What? Is there something on my face?" Iruka asked self-consciously.

"Aren't we supposed to say thanks?" Kakashi asked. Iruka gave him that strange look again.

"Naruto isn't here. I only do that for his sake, really," Iruka explained. Kakashi nodded, his revealed eye making a happy curve.

"Alright then, let's eat!" Kakashi tugged his mask down and took a bite. Iruka ate some of his own serving. He tried to hide the grimace, he really did, but he disliked steamed vegetables and he'd just gotten a big bite of them. "What? Do you not like it?" Kakashi asked immediately. Iruka forced himself to swallow and shook his head.

"No, no, it's wonderful. Thank you for cooking for me," Iruka said with that polite smile Kakashi seemed to see so often.

"So you don't like your vegetables steamed," Kakashi said, as if he had a hidden recorder somewhere. Iruka snorted and put down his chopsticks.

"Okay, what's up with you? You're acting strange, Kakashi." The silver haired shinobi coughed awkwardly into his hand.

"Well, we've never really had a proper conversation, have we? You said I just felt lust, so I'm trying to learn more things about you."

"Like the kind of things Mizuki knows about me?"

"Yes. Wait! I mean…no…I'm just curious," Kakashi replied with a light blush and a dismissive wave of his hand. He suddenly became very interested in eating his meal. Iruka nodded and then grinned at him over his chopsticks as if he was highly amused. He took another bite, and his grin turned playful.

He asked, "So what do you want to know?"

Kakashi's blush intensified. He knew Iruka was teasing him, but how else was he supposed to go about falling for the man? He didn't even really know Iruka! But he'd made the man smile, even if it was at him instead of with him, and that could only be a good sign.

"What do you like to read?" Kakashi asked.

"Novels that aren't pornographic," Iruka quipped. Kakashi glared at him weakly.

"You're mocking me," he said. Iruka rolled his eyes.

"I just don't expect you to actually fall for me. It's a waste of your time, Kakashi. You can do better than me," Iruka said as he took another bite. Kakashi shot him another glare.

"What if I've spent my whole life searching for someone who hates steamed vegetables and doesn't like porn? Did you ever consider that?"

Iruka, who had just put food in his mouth, gasped in laugher and then started choking. With wide, panicked eyes Kakashi hauled him out of his chair and proceeded to try and squeeze the offending food out of Iruka's chest. Jarred by the motions, Iruka spat the food still in his mouth out all over the table. He sucked in a huge gulp of air.

"Are you okay?" Kakashi asked quickly. Iruka wheezed in air and glared at him. When he found his voice he immediately started scolding him.

"What did you squeeze me so hard for?!"

"You were choking! I probably saved your life!" Kakashi replied, drop dead serious. Iruka shook his head wearily and moved to clean up the mess he'd made of their dinner. "Sit down. I'll get it," Kakashi ordered. Iruka obeyed hesitantly, watching as Kakashi cleaned up the table. After he'd recovered a bit, Iruka felt the urge to say something.

"I'm sorry I ruined your nice dinner," he offered weakly. Kakashi glanced at him from his spot in front of the sink.

"It wasn't food you liked anyway," Kakashi replied dismissively. Iruka sighed in mild annoyance. There was an awkward silence. Kakashi peeked at the brunette, who quickly glanced away. "So," Kakashi cleared his throat unnecessarily, "What is your favorite food?"

"Ramen, I guess," Iruka replied politely. Then, after another awkward pause, "What's yours?" Kakashi grinned.

"I like miso soup."

There was yet another awkward silence. Finally Iruka said, "That's nice." Kakashi pulled some ramen out of the pantry, glad that he had some on hand, and began to prepare it. Iruka bit his lip, and then said worriedly, "Kakashi, are you trying to make this like a date?"

"What makes you think that?" Kakashi asked smoothly. Iruka shrugged with a bit of a blush.

"It's just that the only other times we've had dinner you always let me cook and clean up afterwards, and you've never pulled out my chair before – I don't think anyone's ever done that, actually."

"Then I'm doing good?" Kakashi asked. Iruka's eyes narrowed in triumph.

"I knew it! You are trying to make this into a date!" Iruka accused. Kakashi shrugged.

"I never denied it. I just wanted to make sure you understood that this is how someone that's interested in you should treat you," Kakashi said. Iruka scowled.

"Don't judge Mizuki," he warned. Kakashi shot him a look.

"You came to that conclusion on your own. I didn't mention any names," Kakashi retorted. Iruka looked surprised that Kakashi had taken the upper hand in their banter.

"Well…I just thought…"

"Do you always have to have the last word?" Kakashi asked in a cheery voice. Iruka looked taken aback at first, and then merely sullen. He stubbornly didn't reply. "No, I'm sorry, what were you going to say?" Kakashi encouraged with an indulgent smile. Iruka stood up and joined him in the kitchen. He stared intently at the smirking man. The noodles began to soften in the boiling water behind them.

"I'll have you know Mizuki is very charming – he's just insincere about it. But is anyone really sincere when they're trying to schmooze someone?" Iruka asked. Kakashi nodded his head, as if acknowledging the point. After a few silent seconds he sauntered forward and tilted Iruka's face up with a pale, slender finger.

"I don't know if you know this or not, but when I look into your eyes, I don't see my own. They're so soft and brown, like adorable little puppy eyes, but I like to look underneath the underneath." Kakashi tilted Iruka's face a bit, bringing his own closer to it and cupping his cheeks with his hands. "When I do that, I see the loneliness, but mostly I see this tireless faith and strength. It makes me wonder, am I looking into your mother's eyes? And if they are your mother's eyes, your father must have loved her very much. Eyes like yours are hard to resist," Kakashi commented as he tilted his head to one side. Iruka was struck speechless.

Kakashi smiled at him confidently and kissed the tip of his nose. He pulled back, and Iruka almost fell forward when he was no longer resting in his hands. Kakashi turned and fussed with the food on the stove. Over his shoulder he said, "But you're probably right. There's nothing different between that compliment and one that's not really sincere."

Iruka didn't know what to say, but he knew Kakashi had won their argument – hands down. Were his eyes really that expressive? He read others so well, but it seemed no one had ever put any effort into reading him, unless it was to find a weakness of course. Iruka was lost in thought while Kakashi re-set the table.

"Let's try this dinner thing again, hmm?" Kakashi suggested. Iruka glanced up at him, startled out of thought. Kakashi smiled, and some of the awkwardness disappeared. Iruka joined him at the table, and together they ate the hot noodles. Iruka didn't know what compelled him to speak up so suddenly, but he did.

"Mizuki has a fiancé in Konoha," he said. Kakashi paused in his eating for a moment, but then took another bite as if he weren't going to reply. Iruka took another bite and swallowed thickly. He stared into his bowl and felt the urge to speak again. "She's going to be hurt – just like the others. I wish I could prevent that, but part of me wants her to see what Mizuki really is."

"Do you think you're the only person who can love him?" Kakashi asked in a distinctly neutral tone. Iruka actually considered the question.

"I think you have to know a person's bad side and their good side before you can really love them, and she can't have seen his bad side. She wouldn't have stuck around afterwards."

"You did," Kakashi remarked pointedly. Iruka shifted a bit uncomfortably in his seat. Still, there was something so relieving about being able to discuss the situation with another adult.

"I guess it's possible, but Mizuki never treated girls like he treated me. He was always gentle with them. He says I'm the only person he can really be himself around."

"Do you feel like yourself around him?" Kakashi asked gently. Iruka fell into thought again.

"I guess…I feel like the person he needs me to be. Does that make sense?" Iruka asked. Kakashi merely nodded. They finished the rest of the meal in comfortable silence, and something in Iruka felt much better, even though none of his problems had really been resolved.

When the dishes had been cleaned and put away by Kakashi, Iruka stared at him expectantly.

"So what's next?"

"You said you liked to listen to music in the evenings. Do you like sake?" Kakashi asked. Iruka shook his head.

"I shouldn't drink," he replied. Kakashi didn't push the issue.

"Is tomorrow your first day at work?" Kakashi asked. Iruka nodded.

"It's Naruto's first day of school, too. I'm worried that he's out so late."

"Don't be. He'll get some good exercise and sleep well tonight." Kakashi had turned on the radio. It was a soothing tune played on an ocarina.

"That's really pretty," Iruka commented, a smile softening his face. Kakashi moved to the couch and sat down, patting the cushion beside him.

"Sit with me and listen," Kakashi cajoled. Iruka shot him a wary look, as if anticipating that the no-sex rule was about to be pushed. Gingerly, he sat on the opposite end of the couch. Kakashi smirked. "Fair enough," he said. He tugged his mask back up and relaxed into the cushions, letting the music wash over him. Iruka imitated him, but kept cracking open one eye to make sure Kakashi wasn't scooting closer to him.

He wasn't.

Iruka enjoyed a few songs before he wanted to move his legs. A quick glance told him Kakashi appeared to be napping. Smiling in relaxation, Iruka lifted his feet onto the couch and lay back, stretching out his legs and toes pleasantly. His feet almost reached Kakashi's thigh, but not quite. The other man didn't move. Iruka closed his eyes again.

Two more soft songs lulled him into a state of nearly napping. There was a gentle touch against his foot, but Iruka wasn't bothered by it. He turned onto his side, burrowing his face into the couch pillow. It pushed his feet into Kakashi's lap, but Iruka didn't really notice. He was beginning to dream about a field of flowers, and the meadow grass was tickling his feet. He wiggled them a bit, and the touches became less ticklish and firmer instead. He sighed happily. He never dreamed having his feet rubbed could feel so good.

"Hmmm," he murmured appreciatively. Kakashi smiled.

"Does that feel good?" he asked softly. Iruka moaned happily and muttered something into the pillow. Kakashi strained his ears, but he couldn't catch it. The massage stretched on for the most relaxing half hour of Iruka's life. Then the door bounced open loudly and he sat up instantly, realizing with mild embarrassment that Kakashi had been rubbing his feet – not some faceless stranger in a dream. He jerked them out of Kakashi's lap, but it was too late.

"Kakashi-sensei, what were you doing to dad's feet?" Naruto asked. Then, before Kakashi could answer, Naruto turned his questions onto his father. "Are you still sick, Dad?" The little boy came to stand in front of his father and inspect him. Iruka tried to force his blush away. He scrunched up his nose at how badly Naruto reeked of sweat and the outdoors.

"What on earth were you doing? You're soaked in sweat!" Iruka exclaimed in surprise. He'd never seen Naruto exert himself to the point of sweating. The boy had endless reserves of energy.

"Kakashi-sensei's friend likes to run."

"You've been running this whole time? It's been hours, though!" Iruka exclaimed incredulously. Naruto beamed proudly.

"Gai-san said I was tough! He doesn't think I'm a crybaby at all!" Iruka smiled warmly at Naruto.

"I'm proud that you did well, Naruto, but you need a bath. Go on, off to the bathroom," Iruka ordered. Kakashi watched Iruka fuss over the boy, and for once he wasn't bothered that all the attention was immediately shifted away from him and onto Naruto when the boy entered the picture. He wanted to prove to Iruka that not everyone would only take from him in relationships.

He just didn't know how long it would take to teach Iruka the lesson, and he hoped his lust for the man wouldn't get in the way before that could happen, as Iruka obviously suspected it would.

* * *

**A/N**: I'm getting some great feedback from you guys, and I love reading each and every review! I hope you all continue to enjoy the story. 


	8. Obsession

**Fighting Dreamers**

_Chapter 8_  
_"Obsession"_

Iruka slept with Naruto. Although he had a busy day ahead of him, he couldn't stop running his fingers through his son's hair, over his whiskered cheeks, and his tan forehead. A monster was inside of his baby, and it terrified him. In the silent darkness, with only the moonlight slipping through the parted curtains as witness, tears rolled down Iruka's cheeks in a steady stream. He couldn't cry for himself, but his eyes were never dry when his grief was for Naruto.

What would the world do to his baby if they found out what was the source of his energy?

As a parent, he could shield Naruto from hurtful words slung at him, and bandage cuts and bruises, but what did you do when the threat came from the inside? What could he _possibly_ do? And worse – now that he knew, a part of him feared his own son. It made him disgusted with himself, but he couldn't help it or deny it.

There wasn't anything he could do.

He wiped away his tears and tried to sleep, even though he felt wide-awake. Kakashi's surprising gentleness, Mizuki's re-appearance, his new job, Naruto's first day of school, the fox demon…the thoughts and worries drifted through his mind like tumbleweeds, one after another after another and he just couldn't find any peace.

He thought of the meadow, and Kakashi's warm, strong hands on his feet. The thought made him roll out of bed with a pillow and creep into the living room. He'd slept easy enough on the couch. Perhaps he'd find some rest there. He sat on the comfortable sofa and stretched out, just as he'd done while he'd napped, but it wasn't the same. Iruka was almost ready to consider sleep a lost cause, when Kakashi's bedroom door creaked open.

At first he pretended to be asleep. Kakashi was probably just getting some water or something.

Kakashi walked briskly and silently past the couch, but then stopped abruptly. Iruka relaxed his body and resisted taking a peek.

"I wish I didn't have to go like this. Sleep well, Iruka," Kakashi whispered somewhere close to his head. In the next second, there was a brush of lips against his forehead so soft that Iruka almost wasn't sure if he'd been kissed or not. There was a moment of silence and then Kakashi said, with a hint of a grin in his voice, "You're awake, you little faker."

Guiltily, Iruka peeped an eye open. He almost wished he hadn't. Standing over him, porcelain mask pushed to the side of his face, stood Kakashi in full battle attire. It was unnerving to see an A.N.B.U. – even more so to see one hovering over you when you were defenseless and vulnerable. Noticing his tight gasp, Kakashi stepped back and gave him some space.

"Sorry. I forget how I look in this," Kakashi whispered. Iruka sat up, his eyes straining to see the details of the uniform in the darkness. He had known Kakashi was a high-level ninja, but he didn't know that he was A.N.B.U. level. It added a new worry to his heart, and the realization that he was leaving made him frown sadly in the darkness.

"Do you have to go?" he asked nervously. Kakashi moved closer again, slowly extending his hand for Iruka to grab. It reassured Iruka. He couldn't say why.

"I've been doing this for a long time, Iruka. You don't have to worry over me." Kakashi knelt down, so that he was looking up into Iruka's face. Gently, he kissed the back of Iruka's hand, still held in Kakashi's gloved one. Iruka knew it didn't make sense, but he couldn't bring himself to let go of Kakashi's hand. There was a feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach that made him breathless when he thought of Kakashi leaving in the middle of the night without waking him.

What if he didn't come back, and Kakashi died thinking he didn't care for him?

Kakashi pulled his hand back and stood up, shifting his mask into place. Iruka was sure the image of him as he looked just then would never leave his memory. He tried to say something, anything, but his heart protested saying sweet words at the same time that it begged to hear them.

Kakashi began to walk towards the door, like a wraith merging into the darkness and slipping away from him. Iruka stood, stumbled a bit, and then caught Kakashi's hand once more. The man turned, a bit startled, and shifted the mask once again.

"What is it?" he asked quietly. Then, when Iruka didn't say anything, "I'll be back by tomorrow afternoon at the latest."

It was not what Iruka wanted to hear, and he could not say what he wanted to say, so he merely nodded and let Kakashi go.

"Be safe," he finally whispered. Kakashi waved over his shoulder as he left, and that was the only sign Iruka had that Kakashi had heard his whispered plea. Iruka stood in the apartment that suddenly felt so much emptier before restlessly moving back to the couch.

He didn't sleep.

When morning light slanted in through the windows, Iruka spent a few groggy moments watching dust dance in the air before rising and making breakfast for Naruto, and a big cup of coffee for himself.

Naruto woke early and dressed in his best clothing. The stiff blue jean shorts were too loose on him, and his collared, short sleeve shirt was missing a button near the bottom.

"Do I have to wear this, Dad? Can't I just wear my normal clothes?" Naruto whined as Iruka fought vainly to tame the boy's wild hair with a wet comb.

"You should look nice and make a good first impression. Now remember, be polite and respectful no matter what you think of your new teacher. Try to be friendly with the other children, even if they aren't immediately nice to you. I'll be on campus, so if you need anything, just come find me – with the permission of your teacher! Don't go running off on your own, okay?"

"Alright, alright. That's enough, Dad! I'm not a girl!" Naruto protested, slipping past his father and out the bathroom door, only half of his hair combed down. He mused it roughly with his hands until it poked out in all directions again. Iruka sighed.

Naruto sat at the table, expectantly waiting for breakfast. Iruka reached for the vegetables, but Naruto pouted.

"Can't I have ramen? Just this one morning?" Naruto begged. Iruka pulled out the vegetables.

"You need a healthier breakfast than ramen, but if you do well today, we can have it for dinner, okay?" Iruka bargained. Naruto grumbled but didn't protest. After they ate a quick, healthy breakfast, Iruka gave Naruto his bento box. "Are you ready?" he asked. Naruto was bouncing on the balls of his feet, about to explode with excitement.

"Yes! Now let's GO!" Naruto said, pulling Iruka out of the house, barely giving him time to lock up. Iruka was wearing simple, casual clothing – he hadn't been told to wear a uniform. The walk to the Academy went by quickly, and soon they stood outside the front doors.

Iruka hesitated, almost afraid to enter for a moment, but Naruto grabbed the door handle and flung it open, leaping in immediately after without a trace of hesitation. Iruka admired his courage and followed behind him at a much slower pace.

They went inside the front office and greeted the Genin ninja working as a secretary.

"Good morning! Iruka and Naruto Umino?" the secretary assumed. Naruto nodded, a big smile brightening his face. Iruka merely smiled politely.

"Yes, that's us," Iruka replied. The girl shifted through some papers and then stood to walk around the desk. "Ah, yes, here we are. It looks like Naruto will be in Mizuki-san's class. He's an excellent teacher. I was in his class, too," she said to Naruto. Iruka swallowed thickly and lightly touched the girl's arm.

"I'm sorry, I hate to do this, but is there anyone else?" Iruka asked, hoping Naruto wouldn't overhear. The girl looked surprised, and then confused.

"Mizuki-san requested Naruto be put in his class yesterday. He told the Academy head that he would take personal responsibility for bringing Naruto up to speed. Surely you don't wish to turn down such a generous offer? Mizuki-san is very popular as a teacher, and quite skilled."

Iruka cursed Mizuki's slyness and merely nodded. He should have known that Mizuki would try to get to him in whatever way he could – especially through Naruto. Kakashi's presence in their lives had obviously not been a big enough threat.

Iruka really hadn't expected it to work, anyway. He didn't want to push Mizuki away, but until he was certain that Naruto's secret was safe, he didn't want the two of them interacting any more than was absolutely necessary.

Again, he was left feeling helpless. He would just have to warn Naruto not to show off any until Iruka could figure out how to get him in a different class.

* * *

It was lunch when Mizuki found him. He was scrubbing windows near the playground, and Mizuki had brought Naruto's class out for their recess and lunch break. At first, Iruka focused mostly on Naruto. He watched, completely preoccupied, as Naruto waved at him occasionally from the play yard. He smiled and waved back, even though Mizuki was currently attempting to interrogate him.

"What are you doing working here, Iruka? Why are you ignoring me? I've gotten rid of Tsubaki, if that's what you're so mad at me about," Mizuki said. Iruka watched with eagle eyes as a dark haired boy approached Naruto and began to talk with him. "Are you even listening to me?" Mizuki asked rudely. Iruka dragged his eyes away from his son and wearily dropped his cleaning rag back into a bucket of soapy water.

"I'm sorry I shouted at you yesterday. I…was having a disagreement with Kakashi."

"I know you're not seeing him," Mizuki accused. Iruka swallowed thickly.

"I told you. He's just a previous customer that's become possessive over me. I only said that to keep him from strangling you." Mizuki shot him an annoyed look.

"Yeah, well, you should learn to keep a muzzle on your pet." Mizuki watched the children play for a moment disinterestedly. "Speaking of pets, I want you to come over tonight. Tsubaki caused a scene when I dumped her, and I've been in the shittiest mood imaginable ever since." Iruka sighed and tried to find the right words.

"Look, Mizuki, I know we have a long past with each other, and you know I love you – I always have and I always will – but my body needs a break. I'm tired of sex. If you just need to talk, that's fine. I can meet you after I get Naruto to bed."

Mizuki's eyes narrowed at him, and then he looked purposefully in Naruto's direction. He was still talking with the dark haired boy.

"I could make things very difficult for him…if you don't make things easy for me," Mizuki threatened. Iruka scowled.

"Don't play that game, Mizuki. I know you aren't like that. Surely even you can see that it's fucked up for you to drag an innocent child into this mess."

"Since when did you and I become a mess? You know, baby face, this new, grown-up version of you isn't so attractive. You were much cuter drunk." Perhaps it was because he was so tired, and irritated with Mizuki to begin with, but Iruka's reply was quick and harsh.

"Well, one of us has to act like an adult," Iruka practically hissed. Mizuki stared at him intensely for a moment and then smirked.

"Naruto likes me quite a bit now. At first, he wasn't too happy to see me. He seemed to think that I was the one who had upset you yesterday. We had a little talk in the hall and he told me something very interesting," Mizuki said.

Iruka's heart dropped into his stomach. He knew he'd gone pale as a ghost. Mizuki smirked.

"Iruka, you know I think of you as the only one who really knows me – the only one who can satisfy me. I'm not above blackmail, like you're softhearted new toy. I'll have you run out of this village if you don't give me what I want."

"Please, Mizuki, don't do this to me," Iruka began, ready to do anything to just escape his problems. Mizuki honed in on his wariness and swooped down like a bird of prey.

"I want to fuck you in my classroom, tonight. Meet me here at ten."

Just then, Naruto shouted something at the dark haired boy and cocked his fist back. This time, he didn't miss – much to the other boy's surprise. He cradled his bleeding nose almost in disbelief before he darted forward and tugged on Naruto's baggy jean shorts. They slid off easily, and it was revealed that Naruto hadn't put on underwear that morning.

Cursing, Iruka sprinted over, following right behind Mizuki. Mizuki grabbed the dark haired boy's shoulder and turned him around to inspect his nose.

"It's broken, Sasuke-kun. Go to the nurse. Ino-chan, walk with him to make sure he gets there alright," he ordered curtly. Glaring at Naruto, Sasuke took off across the schoolyard at a furious pace. Ino was barely able to keep up with him.

"Naruto, why did you hit him, and why didn't you put on underwear this morning, for god's sake?" Iruka growled, gripping Naruto's shoulder tightly.

"Now he's going to get a scolding from his daddy!" One of the other boys cried out delightedly. Another was quick to join in on the taunting.

"I bet he starts crying!"

"Shut up, brats, all of you! Go back to the classroom, right now!" Mizuki shouted. Angry that recess had been cut short, they all shot scathing looks at Naruto as they shuffled past him. Iruka's grip on his shoulder turned into a more comforting one.

Naruto jerked away. Before Iruka could stop him, he raced across the schoolyard and past the gate, out into the village streets.

"Don't go after him. You have a job to do. I'll let the office know that he took off, and they'll fetch him," Mizuki warned before stalking off, not saying another word. Furious with the situation, Iruka returned to his window washing and put more aggression into it than was necessary.

He was finished with the chore by the time a Genin boy left the school, apparently in search of his son. Iruka didn't know how to feel. On one hand, he wanted to comfort Naruto for going through such a traumatic experience. On the other hand, he wanted to give him the spanking of his life for running off like he had.

He'd probably end up doing both.

The day raced past, as days tend to do when one is dreading something that's coming that night. When he put up the cleaning supplies and went to clock out with the front secretary, Naruto was waiting with the stern looking young man who'd fetched him.

Iruka was given another account of what happened on the playground, and then was told some truly shocking news – Naruto had been found splashing stolen paint onto the Hokage Mountain. Apparently, his new rival, the dark haired boy, Sasuke, had dared him to do it.

Iruka was told that his shift would end after he cleaned up the monument. Both Naruto and Sasuke would be helping him with the task.

The dark haired boy appeared then, his nose looking puffy and his whole head bandaged so that his hair stuck up oddly. Naruto pointed at him and laughed. Iruka knocked him upside the head.

Already feeling exhausted, Iruka fetched some cleaning supplies and told the boys to follow him.

It was a long trek to the monument and required them to climb what felt like a million stairs. By the time they reached the top, Iruka was ready to throw his trouble-making son off the top of the mountain. The boys had grumbled and bickered with each other the entire way, despite his numerous warnings to knock it off.

"I'm not cleaning up his mess. You do it. You're the janitor, right?" Sasuke asked arrogantly. Naruto growled at him like a little bear cub and balled up his fist again. Hastily, Iruka stepped between the two of them.

"Yes, Sasuke-kun, I will be helping you clean this because it's my job. You two will be helping me because you both acted terribly today. Here are two rags. Get to scrubbing," Iruka ordered. For his sanity's sake, he put Sasuke on one side of the giant face and Naruto on the other. He scrubbed in the middle.

It was after two hours of scrubbing that Iruka began to worry Sasuke's parents would be angry with him for being out so late.

"Sasuke-kun, what time do your parents expect you home?" Iruka asked. Sasuke was quiet, and Iruka almost repeated the question again.

"My parents were killed a long time ago," he finally answered. Iruka stopped scrubbing and sighed. He walked to Sasuke's side of the face and looked down at the sullen child.

"Who takes care of you then?" Iruka asked. Sasuke shot him a look full of contempt.

"The village used my money to hire a nanny. She comes to cook for me and then leaves. I take care of myself," Sasuke replied shortly. Iruka's gaze softened, and he returned to his portion of the rock.

"Then you can came have dinner with us tonight, and I'll put fresh bandages on your nose. Don't bother arguing. I won't accept no for an answer," Iruka said. Naruto groaned when he realized Sasuke would be coming home with them. "Shut your mouth, Naruto. I'm very disappointed in your behavior today. It hurts me when you behave so badly. Did I ever teach you to steal? When did I tell you it was okay to ruin something that doesn't belong to you?" Iruka began to lecture. Up until then, he'd resisted the urge. Naruto stayed quiet, harshly scrubbing and trying not to cry.

Finally the job was done to Iruka's satisfaction and they all began the walk towards Kakashi's apartment. Iruka had no real right to return there, but Kakashi was out anyway and he didn't want to make things worse for Naruto by showing Sasuke their shabby apartment.

Besides, he wasn't sure he had enough food at home to feed the two boys, and he was hungry as well. He would just have to take advantage of Kakashi's generosity for one afternoon.

The two boys were exhausted by the time they reached the apartment. Immediately, Iruka ordered them to clean up. Naruto was put in the bath first while Iruka inspected Sasuke's nose.

"Here, hold this ice pack to it." When that task was done, Iruka began fixing them dinner – something healthy and full of vegetables. After all, he'd told Naruto he'd only get ramen if he behaved.

It was in the middle of all this that Kakashi came home. He took one look at the boy sitting on his dining room table with an ice pack held to his nose and then went straight to his bedroom.

"A.N.B.U.!" Sasuke said, though it was muffled by the ice bag on his face. Iruka winced. He probably should have let Kakashi know they were inside somehow. As far as he remembered, the identity of the A.N.B.U. was supposed to be secret.

Kakashi emerged a few moments later in normal clothing, Naruto following on his heels wrapped in a towel, his hair dripping water everywhere. Kakashi passed Sasuke and raised an eyebrow.

"Who are you?" he asked in a bored sounding voice. Sasuke, obviously impressed by his status, quickly replied.

"Uchiha Sasuke, sir," he replied in a respectful tone he had not used with Iruka. Kakashi nodded and then moved into the kitchen. He peeked over Iruka's shoulder but did not embrace him or steal a kiss as he would have done if they were alone.

"Miso soup!" he said happily. Iruka hadn't even realized he'd been making the man's favorite. Still, he wasn't going to tell him that.

"You like miso soup, right?" Iruka asked awkwardly. Naruto came into the kitchen, leaving puddles in his wake.

"Did you kill anybody, Kakashi-sensei? I broke Sasuke's nose, just like you showed me!" Naruto exclaimed proudly. Iruka shot Kakashi a glare.

"Hey!" Kakashi held up his hands in a placating manner, "I didn't tell him to hit anyone!" Iruka rolled his eyes and shoved Naruto out of the kitchen.

"Go get dressed, and then bring your towel back in here to clean up all these puddles, Naruto! Please cooperate with me. It's been a long day and I'm going to have trouble thinking up enough punishments for you if you keep causing trouble tonight," Iruka scolded. Then, to Sasuke, he said, "Alright, Sasuke-kun, let's clean you up in the bathroom and put on some fresh bandages."

"Want me to finish dinner?" Kakashi asked. Nodding gratefully, Iruka passed him the stirring spoon he'd been using.

"When you finish, could you make sure Naruto cleans up the puddles?" Sasuke and Naruto were bickering with each other from opposite ends of the apartment, and Iruka didn't even have a chance to thank Kakashi properly or tell him he was glad that he was back safe. Kakashi stood in the middle of the craziness and felt oddly serene. After his gory mission, the simple, domesticity of a full house and a hot meal cooking was soothing.

In the bathroom, Iruka told Sasuke to wash his arms up to his elbows. Then, while the boy glared, Iruka gently washed his face. He peeled off the old gauze carefully, pulling the bloody cotton away from Sasuke's nose. His face was already quite swollen and bruised.

"I'm sorry Naruto did this to you. He's new here and it's very hard for him. Have you ever been in a new place?" Sasuke only scowled. Iruka didn't let it deter him. "But what you did to Naruto wasn't very nice either. How would you like it if someone pulled your pants down?"

Sasuke averted his eyes. He was unable to stare defiantly into Iruka's for very long.

"That's what I thought. Once we've gotten both of you cleaned up, I want you to apologize to each other and try to be friends. Is that understood?" Iruka asked, forcing Sasuke to look him in the eyes and nod. "Good," Iruka said. He finished bandaging Sasuke, this time taking more care not to mess up the boy's hair so much.

When he was done, without thinking, he kissed him lightly on the forehead and squeezed his shoulder.

"There, all better. Do you need something for the pain?" Sasuke stood frozen in place, staring up at Iruka with wide eyes. Iruka wasn't aware that he'd done anything special. It was his habit to kiss Naruto's forehead whenever he hurt himself, and Sasuke had looked like he needed the tiny comfort. Iruka pretended not to notice Sasuke's assessing look –as if the boy was trying to analyze what the gesture had meant.

Iruka returned to the kitchen, to see Naruto fully dressed in his pajamas, cleaning up the puddles in the kitchen with his towel. Kakashi had finished the dinner and served it, and the meal was waiting. Iruka led Sasuke to the table and then asked Kakashi where he kept his painkillers. The Jounin quickly fetched some for him, and Iruka gave them to Sasuke with a glass of water.

Then they all sat down, Iruka on one end and Kakashi on the other. Iruka smiled tiredly at them all and glanced expectantly at Naruto. The blonde boy grumbled under his breath, but quickly spoke up to avoid his father's wrath.

"I'm thankful for Sakura-chan. She's the girl I'm going to marry once I've beaten up Sasuke," Naruto said. Sasuke shot him a dark look and scowled.

"You'll never beat me, cry baby, and no girl would ever like you!" he retorted. Iruka was about to break up the fight but Kakashi, grinning under his mask, held up a hand.

"Who is this Sakura-chan? Is she cute?" he asked with a happily curved eye.

"No!" Sasuke replied immediately, a disgusted look on his face. Naruto glared at him hotly and then slammed his hand onto the table.

"Don't call Sakura-chan ugly or I'll break your nose again!"

Sighing, Iruka said loudly, "I'm thankful for this quiet, peaceful dinner after a terrible day." Kakashi caught the hint and told the boys to quit bickering. Still, his guilt over riling them up obviously didn't prevent him from getting into more trouble.

"I'm thankful that the new volume of Icha Icha Paradise will be -"

"That's enough about that, Kakashi-san," Iruka interrupted. Kakashi only grinned in reply.

"Let's just eat, and no more bickering, or talking about inappropriate things at the dinner table!" Iruka scolded. Subdued, Naruto mumbled an apology and then plowed into his dinner with gusto. Sasuke took after his example and soon they were all eating the delicious meal. When it was done, Kakashi grinned wickedly under his mask.

"Sasuke-kun, it's late. You should stay the night."

"But -" Naruto interrupted. Kakashi ignored him.

"In fact, I insist. You two go brush your teeth or something," Kakashi ordered. Iruka spent a moment trying to figure out what Kakashi was scheming, but by the time he realized it Sasuke had already agreed to stay.

If Sasuke was sleeping with Naruto, that meant he either had to take the couch again or sleep with Kakashi. He glared at Kakashi when the boys weren't looking.

"I'll clean up, Iruka. Why don't you help the boys get ready for bed?" Feeling irritated by Kakashi's mischief making and the smug look he had on his face, Iruka didn't bother to soften the blow.

"I'll get them to bed, but I'm meeting my friend tonight. It's so kind of you to offer to baby sit the boys."

Kakashi's face went from grinning and mischievous to dead serious in a heartbeat. An awkward tension started to grow. Both boys stared between them unsurely.

"Dad, I didn't know you had a friend -"

"Hush, Naruto. Go get in bed. You go, too, Sasuke-kun."

"But aren't you going to tell us a story?" Naruto began to whine. Iruka shot him an irritated look and nearly lost his temper.

"Naruto, I am not in the mood to hear you whine! Get in bed before you get a spanking!" Naruto looked upset, and Iruka felt guilty for using such a harsh tone with him, but he was still angry with his son and now he was irritated with Kakashi as well. Sasuke, who was much more observant than Naruto, gently tugged on the blonde's shirtsleeve. Reluctantly, Naruto followed after his rival, leaving the adults alone. Naruto's eyes began to water and he scowled furiously in an attempt to keep from crying.

Sasuke leaned close to him so that he wouldn't be overheard by the glaring adults and whispered, "I'll tell you a story, okay?" After hearing that, Naruto managed not to cry. When the boys were out of earshot, Iruka broke his glaring contest with Kakashi and began picking up the dirty dishes. Kakashi didn't move.

"You didn't have to yell at him like that," he said quietly. Iruka practically slammed the dishes into the sink and turned angrily, hands on his hips.

"He broke a boy's nose, ran away from school, stole paint, and then splashed it all over the Hokage Mountain. Since you don't even like Naruto, much less have any right to parent him, I think you should just shut the hell up when you don't know what you're talking about," Iruka growled. He was pissed off and stressed to his maximum. Kakashi remained calm, his face expressionless.

"I wasn't trying to take advantage of you. I thought you might like another massage, since you seemed to have had a hard day," Kakashi replied. Iruka, angered even more by the fact that Kakashi wasn't fighting with him, just slammed his hand onto the counter instead. Immediately, he regretted it as pain shot up his arm. Kakashi still didn't move, merely watched him passively as he cradled his arm against his chest.

"I'm…I'm sorry for yelling. It's just been a really, really bad day," Iruka said, breathing heavily through his nose like an irritated bull. Kakashi finally relaxed and sauntered closer to him.

"Don't go tonight," Kakashi said. The 'stay with me instead' was heavily implied. Iruka scowled at him, and Kakashi froze again.

"I thought you weren't going to ask anything of me. You're trying to make me choose between the two of you," Iruka accused. Kakashi shook his head.

"No. I just don't want to see you hurt," Kakashi replied soothingly. Iruka, however, merely glared.

"You want to get laid instead of Mizuki. You're no better than he is! Using Sasuke-kun to try and manipulate me into a situation that doesn't make me comfortable – what the hell is wrong with you two? Don't you both ever get tired of being so damn sleazy?"

Kakashi wanted to defend himself, but his constant habit of looking underneath the underneath set him on a different track.

"Mizuki manipulated you into going tonight. What has he said to you? Did he threaten Naruto?" Kakashi asked gently. Iruka looked away, the anger draining out of him almost instantly. He looked defeated and very, very tired.

"Please, Kakashi, please don't do this. What do you want to hear? Do you want me to tell you that you're better than he is? Do you want me to tell you that I need to be rescued from my own life? Why can't both of you just leave me alone? Don't you realize that you and Mizuki are the ones causing me to be so stressed and unhappy?"

Hurt, Kakashi swallowed thickly and tried not to let it show.

"You're trying to guilt trip me into letting you do whatever you want to do, but that's not going to work. He's going to hurt you tonight, and I'm not going to let him do it. I said I was going to take care of you, and I'm going to do that whether you like it or not." Iruka's anger snapped back into his eyes.

"Don't fuck with me! I'm not a child you can boss around!"

Frustrated and tired of the mind games, Kakashi shut Iruka up the old-fashioned way. He pulled his mask down roughly and captured Iruka in his arms, slanting his mouth over the brunette's. First he struggled, but as the fiery kiss became more demanding, Iruka's knees weakened and he surrendered to the chemistry between them. Their tongues battled furiously, and Kakashi felt Iruka trying to dominate him. Kakashi growled and trapped Iruka against the kitchen countertop forcefully, refusing to let him step away or escape. The smaller man's temper sparked and he began to push against Kakashi's chest. Kakashi thrust his arousal against Iruka's belly and ran his hands possessively up Iruka's sides. Iruka shuddered and gasped for air when Kakashi finally pulled away.

"Let me go, you son of a -"

Kakashi cut him off with another kiss. He tore out Iruka's hair band and roughly knotted his fingers into the long, chocolate strands. Kakashi reached for the button on Iruka's pants and had the zipper half way down when the feisty brunette kneed him in the crotch. He grunted in pain and bit Iruka's lip on accident. Iruka cursed and pushed him back. He staggered and glared.

Iruka's lip was bleeding heavily. When Kakashi re-gained the ability to speak, he said the first thing that came to mind.

"I'm still not letting you go to him," he growled, feeling as if he were on the battlefield. Iruka covered his bleeding lip with his hand and then turned on the sink, letting the icy water soak a kitchen towel before he pressed it to his mouth. Iruka didn't reply, but his shoulders were shaking badly. Trembling in outrage, Iruka turned around to face him again.

"He knows about Naruto, and he's going to hurt him if I don't do what he wants," Iruka said. Kakashi didn't hesitate to reply.

"Then I'll kill him. Problem solved," he growled. Iruka swallowed thickly and fear crept into his eyes.

"You're unbalanced right now," he said. Kakashi smirked and closed in on him again.

"You think your day was bad? I killed three people today. Killing isn't the hard part, though. What's hard is doing that kind of thing and then coming home to an empty, heartless apartment and thinking about those vacant eyes staring up at you until you collapse. But I get home today and there's this beautiful man making dinner, and these cute kids arguing about pranks and crushes, and puddles on the floor and school bags blocking the door. It was the first time I've ever come back from a bad mission and felt like I wasn't going to fall apart. I said I could care for you without wanting anything for myself, but now I know that I can't. I want this from you," Kakashi gestured at the messy dinner plates and the bedroom that held the slumbering kids. Iruka felt hot tears well up in his eyes.

"I think Naruto and I need to go back to our place tomorrow morning and you need to forget about us," Iruka said shakily, obviously upset. "You're getting way too involved," Iruka said. Frustrated, Kakashi snorted in dismissal and stepped back, his arms crossing over his chest.

"I can't do that. I'm obsessed with you," he replied. Iruka shook his head.

"If you care about me -" Iruka began. Kakashi got in his face, staring deeply into his eyes.

"Don't you get it? I care too much. I want you too much." Iruka gently caressed Kakashi's flushed cheeks, trying to calm him down some.

"Why does what I want never matter? You make pretty promises, but in the end, you're just like everyone else, sweetheart," Iruka whispered. Kakashi brushed his thumb over Iruka's bleeding lip, his revealed eye narrowed.

"I hurt you," he said softly, some of the sanity returning to his uncovered eye. Iruka nodded. Kakashi, the legendary ninja, turned into a helpless baby right in front of Iruka's eyes. The brunette wrapped his arms around Kakashi in a tight hug as the taller man trembled. They sank to the kitchen floor, Kakashi clutching him tightly. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," Kakashi repeated, voice thick with unshed tears. Iruka soothed him.

"Let me put you to bed, sweetheart," Iruka persuaded. Weakly, Kakashi agreed. Holding Kakashi's hand, Iruka lead him into his bedroom and stripped him of his flak vest. He guided him to sit on the bed, and then he pulled off Kakashi's sandals. Iruka gently pushed his shoulders, and Kakashi lay down, allowing Iruka to pull the covers over him. At the last moment, he found Iruka's hand in the darkness.

"I do care about what you want, and I don't want to make you unhappy. You and Naruto go. I won't bother you anymore. If you ever need anything, just…just ask me. I'll still tutor Naruto to help him catch up. Go…go do what you have to do and stop worrying about me," he said brusquely. Feeling as if something was stuck in his chest, Iruka could only nod in reply.

"Thank you," he finally managed to say. Kakashi forced himself to let go of Iruka's hand. Without another word, Iruka left the bedroom and disappeared into the night, heading for the school and his meeting with Mizuki.

* * *

**A/N: **Has Iruka made his choice? Is it over between them? Tune in next time to find out, lol! I hope you guys are enjoying this, and thank you for all the lovely reviews.


	9. A Changed Man?

**Chapter 9**  
_"A Changed Man?"_

Kakashi didn't see or hear from Iruka for the rest of the week. When he'd woken up the morning after their fight, the boys had been gone and the apartment was clean. He felt like something had snapped inside of him – like his heart was broken. He threw himself into his work, acting as if he were a machine instead of a man. He only stopped taking missions when the Chuunin at the mission desk would no longer give them to him.

The hound became a monster, prowling the land like a hungry, wounded beast and killing without mercy.

He entered the mission room and ignored the stares that everyone gave him.

"I need another mission," he snapped. His uniform was filthy and his eyes were bloodshot from lack of sleep. The Chunnin behind the desk nervously rifled through some paperwork. "Now!" Kakashi growled impatiently. The man gulped and thrust a piece of paper towards him. He snatched it and stalked away without another word. His eyes scanned the briefing disinterestedly.

It was a D class mission. A woman that lived on the edge of the village needed an animal killed that was attacking her chickens at night. Perhaps if he'd been more like himself, he would have noticed that the name of the woman was familiar.

He leapt quickly and silently across rooftops until the buildings thinned out and his only option was to run on land. Minutes later the quaint farmhouse came into view. Kakashi slowed his pace and approached the woman working in her garden. When he was behind her, he cleared his throat. She jumped in surprise.

"Oh!" she exclaimed. She stood, brushing the dirt off her simple sundress. In the fading sunlight, she looked beautiful – there was a soft glow about her. Kakashi, of course, didn't notice.

"You requested a ninja to exterminate an animal attacking your chickens," he recited in a monotone. She surprised him by extending her hand towards him, obviously not frightened by his terrible appearance. Reluctantly, he shook her hand.

"I'm so glad you've come. I'm Tsubaki. What's your name?" she asked politely. Kakashi's revealed eye narrowed.

"You're Tsubaki?" he asked, letting go of her hand. She nodded, looking puzzled.

"Do I know you?" she asked. Kakashi scowled.

"Mizuki-san mentioned you. You're the girl he deceived, cheated on, and then dumped," Kakashi said harshly. Tsubaki's pleasant smile faded and she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Are you…a friend of Mizuki's?" she asked, a bit coldly.

"I wouldn't piss on him if he were on fire," Kakashi spat in reply. Tsubaki looked up at him with big, startled eyes.

"He's hurt you, too. Please come inside. Dinner is almost ready, and you look very tired. I would like to talk to you about him," she implored. Something in her gentle manner left him unable to refuse. He followed after her.

Her home was small and tidy, and it smelled delicious. She sat him down in the kitchen and quickly brought him tea. She turned off the oven. He took a hesitant sip of his drink and then a larger one. It was warm and mildly sweet with a hint of honey.

"You're better off without him," Kakashi said. Her gentle voice and the atmosphere of her home suggested she was a sweet, simple girl. She didn't deserve someone like Mizuki in her life. Tsubaki poured her own tea and joined him at the table. Her pale, dainty hand clasped his gently. He didn't tell her to let go.

"Mizuki is very angry inside. His life before I met him was hard, but he's changed. With our wedding approaching, I could tell he was getting frightened. Mizuki isn't very courageous. He has to work hard to be a good person," she said. Kakashi chugged down the rest of his tea in one gulp.

"He stole my boyfriend and is raping him, using his kid to manipulate him into doing whatever he wants," Kakashi said without a hint of sympathy. Tsubaki's delicate hand covered her mouth, her eyes startled and glassy with pain. Kakashi felt guilty for being the one to break it to her, but he was too miserable to care very much. He looked away and out the small window over the kitchen sink. "I'm sorry I said it like that," he mumbled. She wiped at her eyes with a nearby napkin and made a visible attempt to pull herself together.

"No…I'm glad you told me. It's just that…you see…I'm pregnant. Mizuki left before…before I could tell him," she explained sadly. Kakashi glanced at her sharply.

"I'm going to kill him. I really am," Kakashi replied hoarsely. Tsubaki shook her head and reached for his hand again.

"It seems we both love someone who's hurt us," she said. Kakashi scowled.

"I can't love Iruka. I hardly know him," Kakashi replied. Tsubaki shook her head slowly.

"You love him. I can tell. You haven't slept or eaten. At least I've had my baby to keep me going, but you don't have anything left to fight for," she whispered. Kakashi snorted.

"I didn't have anything to begin with."

"Things ended badly between the two of you?" Tsubaki asked gently. Kakashi nodded once. She sighed sadly. "I don't know what to do. I guess you don't know either. I've been hoping Mizuki would come to his senses once he realized that he wasn't happy without me."

"I've thought about taking him out in the woods and beating him," Kakashi offered, only half-joking. Tsubaki didn't smile.

"This Iruka of yours…is he a good man?" Tsubaki asked. Her voice was doubtful. Kakashi glanced at her sharply.

"He's got a heart of gold," Kakashi replied. Tsubaki nodded, as if settling a debate that had been going on in her own head.

"Then perhaps I can help you. I still need to tell Mizuki about the baby, but I don't know how he'll react. He's been violent around me before, but now I have more to consider than just my own health. Could you could take me to him?" Kakashi didn't understand how that would help him, because if the girl thought Mizuki was going to give up his plaything just because of an unplanned baby, she was underestimating just how big of an asshole he was. Still, she seemed naïve and sweet. If she was determined to tell Mizuki, it was best that she did it when he was there to protect her.

"I don't know where he is," Kakashi said. Tsubaki stood, tugging gently on his hand. He stood as well, waiting for her reply.

"I'll take you to his house. Let's go," she said, her eyes full of determination. Wordlessly, Kakashi allowed her to lead him out of the house and back into the village.

It took them a long time to reach Mizuki's apartment, and as they walked, Tsubaki talked about her relationship with Mizuki.

"When he came to Konoha, he had nothing. He was young and determined to make a good life for himself. We met at the market where I sell my vegetables. I thought he was very handsome, and I treated him kindly. When I needed work done, I gave him the jobs. I came to understand his situation, and I invited him to stay with me until he could find steady work. I had fallen pretty hard for him by that point," Tsubaki said with a small smile on her face. Kakashi listened but didn't comment. She continued her story after a few moments of personal reflection. "He was polite but distant. He explained that he had never had good relationships in the past, and that he didn't want to repeat his old mistakes. He was trying to change everything about his life, and I could tell it was very hard for him. My uncle is a Jounin ninja in charge of running the Academy. I told him about Mizuki and asked him to repay a favor."

"I wondered how he became a Chuunin without graduating from the Academy," Kakashi commented. Tsubaki pulled her shawl a little tighter around her shoulders. The wind was getting chilly.

"Mizuki did go to the Academy before his parents were killed, so he knew the basics. He was only a year away from graduating when he was sent to the orphanage. He was a fast learner, and worked very hard. In just two years he managed to pass the Chuunin exam and my uncle offered him a teaching job at the Academy. All the while he helped me with my farm and we grew closer. He didn't like telling me about his past, but over the years I pieced things together. All I asked of him was to be honest with me, and for the most part he was. Being a ninja gave him an outlet for his anger, and it was rare that he lost his temper with me. He tried very hard to treat me differently than he had treated women in the past, but I could tell it was a struggle. There were times he wanted to leave me, and times he got very drunk and told me terrible things to try and scare me away from him. When he had enough money, he got his own place and probably cheated on me a few times."

"Why stay with him? Why let him treat you that way?" Kakashi interrupted. Tsubaki sounded just like Iruka – snared helplessly by whatever mysterious power Mizuki held over them. Tsubaki, much to his surprise, gave him a bright smile.

"Because I loved him. I didn't expect him to be perfect. Every time he messed up, he would come to me and apologize. He was honest about it, and sincere in wanting to change. No road that long is without hardships, so I expected him to falter. It got better. When he proposed, we had dated for eight months without any problems."

"Then Iruka came," Kakashi finished. Tsubaki nodded.

"Yes, and then Iruka-san came." They walked a little longer in silence. Kakashi was curious about what Tsubaki knew of Iruka and Mizuki's past together, so he asked.

"Did Mizuki-san ever mention Iruka?" Tsubaki's eyes narrowed thoughtfully, as if she had been pondering the question before Kakashi asked it.

"I've never been told his whole story, so Iruka-san could have been one of the many people Mizuki has mentioned from his past. I can tell you that Mizuki has had more than one male lover, and all for the same reason. He feels he has darker desires that a woman can't satisfy. He said that being a ninja replaced those urges, but I suppose old habits die hard," she commented.

"So Iruka wasn't as special to Mizuki as he leads Iruka to believe?" Kakashi concluded.

"Probably not. Mizuki has a manipulative streak. No doubt Iruka-san sincerely loves him and Mizuki is taking advantage of that to re-live his younger days. I've been told he's drinking heavily again. It's just cold feet before the wedding, but because he is who he is, naturally it has to be as dramatic and painful for me as he can possibly make it. It's his final fight. If he can come out of this and realize it's not the kind of life he wants, he can leave it behind without regrets."

"I don't understand why he's worth all the effort, and I don't think he deserves all the faith you put in him," Kakashi grumbled, frustrated by the fact that he couldn't understand the situation. A large apartment building came into view as they rounded a corner. Tsubaki took his hand once again and squeezed it gently.

"It seems no one has ever told you, Kakashi-san. Love rarely makes sense. It's messy and painful, and it makes you foolish. Sometimes you feel like you loose more than you gain, and I know better than anyone that Mizuki is a hard man to love. But there are moments when it's simple and pure and good. We've sat watching the sunrise together and I've realized that without him, the world wouldn't be quite so beautiful. For me, those moments are worth all the pain. Love isn't like the fairy tales, and it isn't for quitters."

Kakashi sighed. He could understand her words, but he still felt like he was missing something. It was as if he could see brush strokes, but the painting as a whole remained hidden. Kakashi knew nothing about love.

Finally, they stood outside Mizuki's door. Kakashi let Tsubaki work up her courage for a few moments before she knocked.

Iruka answered.

"Kakashi! What are you doing here? And who's this?" Iruka asked immediately. Tsubaki, much to Kakashi's surprise, answered him in a tone that sounded nothing like the gentle voice she'd used earlier. It was firm and strong and without any hesitation.

"Are you Iruka-san?" she asked. The brunette nodded. Instantly, before Iruka or Kakashi even knew what was happening, Tsubaki had slapped him across the jaw. "That was for having sex with my fiancé. You should be ashamed of yourself. If I were you, I'd run back to the man who loves you while he'll still take you back, because Mizuki is mine."

Stunned, Iruka didn't protest when Tsubaki pushed by him and into the living room.

"Mizuki! Get out here this second!" Equally surprised, Mizuki came stumbling out of the bedroom half dressed. His eyes widened almost comically when he saw who stood in the living room.

"Tsubaki!" he exclaimed.

"Sit down and listen, and don't interrupt me," she ordered. Obediently, Mizuki sat on the couch, blinking up at her in a dumbfounded kind of way.

"I know what you've been up to behind my back, and I know just what kind of person you are, Mizuki. Despite that, I'm here because I promised to love you and I'm going to stand by that promise. I know you're just using him because you're afraid."

Mizuki's expression turned dark and he glared up at her. "I'm not afraid of you," he said in a voice that lacked conviction. Tsubaki just shook her head.

"Before he came, you were doing well. You quit drinking, you were getting noticed at work, and you were finally starting to let yourself heal. Then he comes back and you let yourself start thinking that this person is who you are – you give up on yourself! Inside of you is a good person, Mizuki, and I'm not going to accept that this is the best you can offer the world. Your life has been hard, and I know that, but I won't let you give up and go back to your old ways. You love me in a way that you don't love him, and that scares you. The idea of getting married scares you, because it means your old life is over and you have to let the past go."

Mizuki stood, scowling heavily, unable to face the petite, pretty woman that had suddenly become so passionate. Kakashi was beyond amazed. The whole scene was like watching a movie – like they were all actors and it was not his real life.

"You say you understand me, but you don't know. Iruka knows – he knows what I've been through. He loves me at my worst! I don't have to hide or suppress anything around him," Mizuki ranted. Rather than backing down, Tsubaki drew herself up and clenched her fists.

"Are you proud of the person you are with him? Does his love make you happy?"

Kakashi and Iruka watched as Mizuki slumped back down onto the couch. He gave Iruka a long, hard look. Then he looked at Tsubaki, and his gaze softened.

"I'm sorry, angel. You're right. I'm not…I'm not this person anymore. I'm not happy," he confessed. Tsubaki crossed her arms over her chest and glared down at him. "And what do you have to say to Iruka-san?" she questioned harshly. Slowly, Mizuki raised his head.

"I…I had forgotten all about you until I saw you again at the bar. You've always just accepted whatever I did to you, and I've never respected you because of that. Tsubaki saw me at my worst, too, but she wants me to be better. You, and all the others before Tsubaki, gave up on me a long time ago. I'm sorry for lying to you and using you to see if marrying Tsubaki was what I really wanted. I know now that it is."

Before Iruka could reply, Tsubaki began talking again.

"I'd hoped you would figure this out on your own, but obviously you needed a kick in the pants. I'm glad you've finally come to your senses, because in eight months we're going to be parents."

"Angel! You're…pregnant?" Mizuki asked weakly. Tsubaki smiled at him and nodded her head. Mizuki stood and slowly, a sincere, loving smile crept onto his face for Tsubaki. Iruka had never seen such a smile on him before. It wasn't the Mizuki Iruka remembered as a child – it was better than that. It was a man that had been changed. It was a man who had moved on. Or it was a man that knew how to fake it really, really well.

Kakashi watched Iruka watch the happy couple. The brunette looked betrayed, confused, and hurt all at the same time. He hadn't been eating, and his eyes looked dead. Gently, Kakashi grasped Iruka's hand.

Iruka held onto him tightly. After the couple had kissed and made up, Tsubaki focused once more on Iruka.

"Kakashi-san is a good man, and I may not understand what he sees in you, but I suggest you learn to appreciate him and stay away from my Mizuki. Am I clear?"

Iruka could only nod weakly. Before Kakashi could stop him, he pushed past him and out of the apartment. Turned so that Mizuki couldn't see, Tsubaki floored Kakashi by giving him a sweet smile and a wink. She was like a flower coated in steel.

Smiling a bit to himself at the surprising turn his night had taken, he left the apartment as well. Kakashi thought maybe he could see another, new brush stroke. Tsubaki was just as uncomprehending of why he was attracted to Iruka as he was when it came to why she loved Mizuki. Still, the big picture eluded him. But he understood just a little bit more about love, he realized.

_'Nobody outside of it can comprehend it – not when they haven't felt those moments of epiphany for themselves. Tsubaki's never seen Iruka in the way I've seen him, so she doesn't see how perfect he is for me,'_ Kakashi realized.

Iruka didn't go far. He didn't break down, but it was a close thing. When Kakashi caught up to him, he was leaning against a building and staring up at the stars that were just coming out.

"He left me a long time ago. I should have expected something like this. I wasn't strong enough to ever really let him go, but he didn't love me, and I knew that. I've been…terrible to you and to Naruto. I'm sorry," he said quietly.

"You can have a new start, too, Iruka," Kakashi said simply. The brunette didn't reply. "Where's Naruto?" Kakashi asked. Iruka, still staring at the sky, was quiet for a long time before he answered.

"He's…with Sasuke-kun, I think. I haven't been a very good dad this past week. Naruto's mad at me. We got kicked out, and he realized I was with Mizuki and that Mizuki was hurting me. I shouted at him," Iruka explained. Kakashi sighed.

"Iruka, come here," he encouraged. The brunette pushed off of the wall and hugged him. For a long time, he just let Kakashi comfort him.

"I don't deserve your comfort after how I've acted. I've been so _fucking _stupid," Iruka mumbled into his chest. Kakashi grinned underneath his mask.

"We were both stupid. It's okay to make mistakes when you're learning," Kakashi said. Iruka blinked up at him and swallowed despite the lump in his throat. He had to confess.

"I wanted to give up. This week has been hell, and I didn't think it was ever going to end. I was going to…to do something really stupid," Iruka confessed. Kakashi tightened his hold on him, but Iruka rushed to finish before Kakashi could react. "But you didn't give up on me. You came for me, and I needed you. I've messed up worse than I ever have before, but you still came for me," Iruka repeated, as if he almost didn't believe it himself.

The thought of Iruka ending his own life scared him more than anything else ever had before. He remembered his father, and the way he'd looked when he found him. He'd had fewer reasons to kill himself than Iruka had. Yet, Iruka was still with him, still alive, still clinging to whatever hope Kakashi could give him. History was not repeating itself, and the proof was breathing in his arms.

When he hugged Iruka again, this time it was practically bone crushing. When the embrace ended, Iruka was crying big, fat tears. Tenderly, Kakashi brushed them away.

"I'm a bad father. I was so selfish! I was in so much pain that I forgot about my own child. What kind of father does that?" Iruka asked him, oblivious to the memories he was forcing Kakashi to relive.

_'What kind of father does that?'_ Kakashi asked in his head. _'Mine did that.'_

Oblivious, Iruka began to wipe at his tears uselessly. Iruka had snapped and now he needed him to be strong for both of them.

"Come on, Iruka, I'm going to take you home," Kakashi said gently. He wrapped his arms around the shorter man and used a jutsu to transport them to his apartment. He scooped Iruka up and carried him, bridal style, into his room. He tucked him into bed and kissed his forehead. "Go to sleep. I'm going to go check on Naruto."

Iruka nodded and his eyes closed obediently. He was almost acting child-like, as if all his strength and will had left him and he was helpless. Kakashi would be strong for him, then, until he could be strong for himself again.

Kakashi left the apartment and headed for the old Uchiha complex on the edge of the village. It wasn't too late, so he simply rang the doorbell. It took a few moments, but eventually the door cracked open to reveal little Sasuke glaring up at him. His expression changed quickly upon recognizing him. He opened the door wider.

"Naruto-kun is sick," he said immediately. Quickly, Kakashi entered the complex and told Sasuke to lead him to Naruto. He heard the sounds of retching before he saw the boy. Naruto was pale and his eyes were glowing red. He'd vomited into a trashcan, and sweat poured down his face and bare torso. Sounding childlike in his worry, Sasuke rushed to explain. "He can't eat anything. After he fought with his dad, he's been really upset. He keeps waking up from sleep screaming, and he's scratching himself and pulling out his hair. His eyes are glowing red. I've never seen that before."

From his spot on the bed, Naruto dry-heaved again and looked up at him miserably. A bit of blue seeped into his irises.

"I w-w-want my d-d-d-daddy!" he sobbed. Kakashi understood what was going on. No doubt, when Naruto became overly emotional, the demon inside him became stronger, feeding off of Naruto's lack of control. Kakashi was not an expert at sealing techniques, but he could repair a seal that was weakening.

He joined Naruto on the big bed and lifted up the boy's shirt, searching for the seal. Naruto fought him, squirming and scratching him with his nails. Thankfully, the seal was easy enough to locate. It stood out darkly on his pale stomach. Without hesitation, Kakashi dug his fingers into the seal and sent his chakra flowing into the tiny, paper strip that trapped the demon behind bars inside of Naruto's soul. The blonde boy shook violently and then collapsed, limp in his arms.

Kakashi lifted up an eyelid. As he'd suspected, the boy's orbs were blue again. The seal on his stomach was already fading away to nothingness. It had weakened a great deal since he'd first received it. It was a miracle that Iruka had been able to halt its deterioration. With a relieved sigh, Kakashi picked Naruto up in his arms.

"He's better now, but I'm going to take him to the hospital. Will you be alright here by yourself?" he asked. Sasuke tried to look tough.

"I live by myself. I don't need a babysitter," he replied. Nodding in reply, Kakashi left quickly.

At the hospital, his reputation got him instant attention.

"Kakashi-san! What's wrong?" a nurse questioned.

"This boy has been sick with…the stomach flu. I've been trying to help him recover, but it's gotten too serious. He can't keep any food down." Kakashi knew he should have told them about the demon, but he told himself that Naruto was fine now that the seal was strengthened – he only needed some food and rest.

"Get me a stretcher," the nurse said to another member of the staff. To Kakashi she said, "We'll take excellent care of him, so don't you worry."

"I know he's in good hands now," Kakashi said. Nodding in a no-nonsense fashion, the nurse took Naruto from his arms and placed him on the stretcher. He was whisked away. Another nurse came up to him with some paperwork to fill out.

"How are you related to the patient?" she asked, pen ready to mark his reply.

"I'm his teacher. His father has also been sick this week, so I'm taking care of them."

"Alright, what symptoms does he have?" she asked.

"He was throwing up, fever, unable to sleep well," Kakashi replied in a monotone. She scribbled down his answers and then signed her name on a portion of the paperwork.

"You can fill out the rest, please," she said as she passed him the clipboard. Nodding, Kakashi took it and sat down in the lobby. There were quite a few questions he couldn't answer, so he just left them blank. When he'd answered everything that he could, he returned the paperwork to the nurse. She glanced at it and then filed it away.

"The nurse says Naruto-kun is weak but he should be fine by morning. The only overnight visitors allowed are family members, so you can't be in his room, I'm afraid. You might as well go home and get some rest and come back at six tomorrow. We'll have him in better shape by then and he'll probably be allowed to go home." Kakashi nodded, thanked her, and left.

By the time he made it back home, it was almost nine. He realized he hadn't completed his mission, but he figured he'd turn in a fake mission report and take care of it tomorrow if Mizuki didn't take care of the animal for her.

Iruka wasn't sleeping. The shower was on, and Kakashi didn't hesitate to open the bathroom door and check on him.

"Iruka? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," Iruka called back. Satisfied that Iruka was holding himself together, Kakashi decided not to tell him about Naruto just yet. He toed off his sandals and slipped off his flak jacket. He dug around in his dresser until he found some clean boxers and a tank top. Lastly he took off his mask and left it on the nightstand.

The bathroom door opened and Iruka emerged in a cloud of steam. He had a towel around his waist and one twisted around his long hair. He looked a little better. Kakashi watched as he came closer, entranced by a droplet of water rolling down his chest.

"Can I borrow some clothes?" Iruka asked. Kakashi's eyes snapped back up to where they should have been all along and he nodded. Iruka sat on the bed while Kakashi searched for some old pajama pants he'd bought a long time ago. Wordlessly, he passed them to Iruka. He expected the man to tell him to turn around or leave the room, but Iruka merely dropped his towel and stepped into the pants without any hint of modesty or embarrassment.

Sometimes Kakashi forgot just how experienced Iruka really was, and how any bashfulness Iruka pretended to have about his body was just an act. Kakashi liked seeing him act naturally around him – he liked how comfortable and real it felt. Iruka untwisted the towel around his hair and rubbed his head roughly a few times before flipping his hair back. It looked even longer wet. It almost reached his lower back.

Iruka noticed Kakashi's intense gaze and misinterpreted the meaning behind it.

"It's getting too long, I know. I need to cut it," he said absently. Kakashi didn't know what they were supposed to talk about after the night they'd had, but a haircut didn't seem quite right. Iruka sighed and looked at him apprehensively. "Don't look so serious, okay? I know I scared you tonight. I'm sorry. A million times, I'm sorry," Iruka said almost pleadingly. Kakashi nodded a bit stiffly.

"Are you…okay now?" he asked unsurely. He felt so vulnerable without his mask – like Iruka could read every thought in his head. The brunette sighed again by way of answer.

"I'm better than I was before you showed up. How was Naruto?" Iruka asked in a tone that carefully hid his true emotions concerning his son.

"He's fine. You don't have to worry about work tomorrow, and he doesn't have to go to school, so you can talk to each other then. As for tonight, get some rest. You need it," Kakashi said. There were a few moments of silence. Iruka didn't seem like he wanted to jump under the covers any time soon. He reached out his hand, and confusedly, Kakashi grabbed it. With a look of intense concentration on his face, Iruka pulled him forward, until he was standing between Iruka's knees. From his spot on the bed, Iruka stared up at him, his hands idly running up the back of Kakashi's bare legs.

"Thank you," he half-whispered into the darkness. Kakashi nodded, his own hands tracing up Iruka's arms and coming to rest on his cheeks. Iruka's hands skimmed over his backside and locked around his waist. He pulled him again until Kakashi crawled onto the bed, sitting in his lap.

"You've had a long day," Kakashi remarked, still caressing Iruka's face. Iruka stared up at him, his eyes narrowing.

"You don't look so great yourself. What were you doing all this week? It looks like you haven't eaten or shaved for days." Iruka scratched his fingers gently over the stubble on his jaw to prove his point. Kakashi smirked, leaning over to playfully rub his cold nose against Iruka's.

"I didn't feel like eating and I threw myself into work. I missed you," he said. Iruka surprised him by kissing him firmly on the lips in reply.

"Then let's eat. I'm hungry, too," he said when the kiss had ended. The two of them made their way into the kitchen. Iruka started to open the refrigerator, but Kakashi re-directed him to the table. Iruka sat down and watched him.

"I'm cooking. You're resting," Kakashi ordered. Iruka gave him a lopsided smile and rested his head on his crossed arms.

"I'm resting," he repeated obediently. Kakashi flashed him a grin.

"So how long are you going to be a good boy and do what I tell you to do?" Kakashi asked.

"Hmmm," Iruka mused out loud. "Until you get sick of me, I guess."

Kakashi paused.

"So does this mean you're going to give me a chance?"

Smirking, Iruka replied, "Well, I don't know any other gay guys in Konoha."

"I deserved that, didn't I?" Kakashi replied. Iruka only smiled. Kakashi pulled down a mixing bowl from a cabinet and shook his head. "Look, I can't believe I'm about to say this…" he began. Iruka sat up quickly with a worried look on his face. Kakashi rushed to finish. "I think we shouldn't have sex!" he forced out quickly.

Iruka's worried look turned into one of pure disbelief.

"Should I come pinch you and see if you're real or not?" he asked dismissively, running his fingers through his wet hair to get rid of tangles. Kakashi shot him an irritated look and continued cooking.

"I'm serious," he said. Iruka quit messing with his hair and looked at Kakashi like he was crazy.

"So let me get this straight. I spend weeks telling you that I won't sleep with you, so all you do is try to get in my pants, and then when I tell you I will sleep with you, you don't want to."

"It sounds strange when you say it like that, but I'm just thinking you need a break," he replied, almost sounding hesitant. Iruka took a moment to consider what he'd said, staring at him intently as he did so.

"That sounds good," he finally agreed. Kakashi nodded and smiled, even though he felt like someone should tattoo the word idiot onto his forehead for even suggesting the idea. Iruka left the table and hugged him from behind, burying his face into Kakashi's back. Setting his stirring spoon down, Kakashi reached an arm around and pulled Iruka to his side. He smiled down at him and rubbed his back. Smirking, Iruka stood on tiptoes and kissed his jaw. Into his ear, he whispered, "I give you one week."

Kakashi gulped. He'd been challenged, and he wasn't going to loose.

Hopefully.

* * *

**A/N: **So who believes Mizuki is really reformed? And how long do you think Iruka and Kakashi's peace will last? Thanks for reviews - I"m loving hearing what you have to say about the story. 


	10. The Happy Mask

**Chapter 10**  
_"The Happy Mask"_

After eating they returned to the bedroom. Kakashi slipped into the bathroom for his nightly routine while Iruka fussed with the sheets. The dark blue sheet had slipped off the mattress, but since the bed was pushed into the corner, Iruka had to do some maneuvering to fix it. When Kakashi came out of the bathroom, Iruka was in the middle of the bed on all fours, fixing the sheet and giving Kakashi a perfect view of his ass. The pajama pants he'd borrowed were loose – all it would take was one little tug…

"Inside or outside?" Kakashi asked quickly, hoping Iruka wouldn't notice that his voice was unnaturally high. Iruka glanced over his shoulder and then sat back on his heels.

"Inside," he decided as he slipped under the covers. Teasingly he added, "Unless you'd prefer to sleep in separate bedrooms."

Kakashi seriously considered the idea. He knew a break was what Iruka needed, but it was difficult to convince a certain part of his anatomy of that fact. Iruka's casual attitude about it wasn't helping either.

"I wasn't serious, Kakashi," Iruka said quickly. Kakashi joined him in bed, arranging the covers around his chest neatly and crossing his hands over his stomach. He stared up at the ceiling. Iruka curled onto his side, staring at his profile in the dark room. He gave him an expectant look. Kakashi cleared his throat and shifted a few inches away from him. Iruka started to grin. "So we're together now, but you're not going to touch me?" he clarified. Kakashi just couldn't trust himself.

"Maybe we _should_ sleep in -"

Iruka closed the distance between them and hooked his leg around Kakashi's waist. Then he dragged his pillow over and moved Kakashi's arm so that he was nestled against his side.

"Much better," Iruka mused. Kakashi had to admit that it did feel nice. He wasn't immediately overwhelmed with the desire to fuck like he had anticipated. It was just warm and cozy.

He liked it.

He drifted off to sleep faster than he usually did, lulled to dreamland by Iruka's steady breathing. It felt like he'd only closed his eyes for a moment when his internal alarm clock went off.

It was 5:30 – time to go pick up Naruto. He opened his good eye and smiled. They hadn't moved much during the night. Iruka's face was hidden in his shirt, and his long hair was fanned over the pillow and his shoulder. For a moment, he played with some of the silky strands and memorized the feel of waking up with Iruka in his arms.

Reluctantly, using his ninja skills, he got out of the bed without disturbing Iruka's sleep. He dressed silently and left. Hopefully, Iruka wouldn't even wake up.

The hospital was just opening to visitors as he arrived. The nurse he'd spoken with the night before was about to end her shift, but she quickly briefed him on Naruto's progress.

"He's not rejecting food anymore, and his color has returned to normal. If I hadn't watched him myself I'd think someone switched him with a totally different little boy! He's up in room 210," she informed as she pulled on her sweater. Kakashi thanked her and headed for the stairs. He jumped them two at a time and quickly located Naruto's room. After a gentle knock he entered. Naruto was sitting up in bed, three empty breakfast trays sitting on a rolling table beside him. He had been staring out the window, but when Kakashi came in, he greeted him quietly.

He was subdued, and Kakashi had a feeling that it wasn't because he'd been sick.

"How are you feeling?" Kakashi asked him. Naruto shrugged.

"Okay I guess," he replied. "I don't really remember what happened. The doctor said I had the stomach flu and that you brought me in."

"That's right," Kakashi replied, coming fully into the room. Naruto pouted for a moment and then became angry.

"Where's my dad?" he asked, blue eyes blazing. "What's going on?"

Kakashi nodded, having already anticipated the questions. He moved to stand by the window and enjoyed the view of the sunrise. He found himself searching for his apartment, where he knew Iruka was sleeping.

"How old are you now, Naruto?"

"I'm eight," the blonde boy replied. Kakashi nodded again.

"So you're not a kid anymore," Kakashi said. Naruto nodded enthusiastically.

"My dad thinks I am, but I'm almost grown," he replied proudly, already forgetting his anger.

"Hmmm…so what do you know about dating?" Kakashi asked in a bland monotone. Naruto turned a brilliant shade of red.

"It's…err…well…you know!" he managed to reply. Kakashi grinned a bit, but didn't let Naruto see.

"It's what two people do who care a lot about each other," Kakashi offered. Naruto nodded, trying to control his blushing.

"So what does that have to do with my dad?" Naruto asked, his eyes narrowing suspiciously.

"I care a lot about your dad, so if it's okay with you, I'd like to take him out on a date," Kakashi said.

"No!" Naruto replied instantly, arms crossed stubbornly. Kakashi's grin turned into a smile.

"Naruto, your dad has been through a tough time lately, hasn't he?" Kakashi asked. The little boy frowned, but he couldn't deny it. "Your teacher, Mizuki-sensei, and your dad used to be friends when they were boys, but they had a big fight."

"Mizuki-sensei hurt my dad!" Iruka half shouted. Kakashi gestured at him to calm down and moved to sit beside him.

"He apologized. Friends fight like that sometimes, so don't be mean to your teacher because of it, okay?" Naruto looked like he wanted to protest, but he remembered that Iruka had called Mizuki a friend.

"Alright," Naruto agreed reluctantly.

"Now that that's settled, why don't you want me to date your dad?" he asked, his grin returning. The whiskered boy glared at him.

"You're a boy!" he protested. Kakashi nodded.

"That's true, but I like him. It's okay for two boys to like each other just like boys and girls do – it's just not as common." Naruto looked uncomfortable, but he nodded his head.

"Fine…but I still say no. He's my dad. He's already ignored me all week!" Naruto pouted. Kakashi ruffled his hair. The kid wasn't so bad after all. At least he could be reasoned with.

"He's been sick this week, Naruto. He's still not feeling good, so you have to act like a grownup and help me take care of him, okay?"

"Okay, but Kakashi, the mean, fat guy kicked us out of our house! Dad took me to Mizuki-sensei's house, and they had a fight in another room, and then dad came out and took me to Sasuke's house and left me there! He came back later to bring me clothes and when I asked him questions he yelled at me!" Naruto said sadly. He looked like a kicked puppy. Kakashi sighed.

"It's just been a bad week for everyone. Don't worry about your house. I'll get it sorted out. In the meantime you and your dad can stay with me. You can have your own room," Kakashi said, hoping it would tempt the boy. Naruto didn't buy it.

"Dad sleeps with me," he said, his eyes narrowed. The kid was on to his game.

"We'll work something out," Kakashi replied. Naruto's intense look continued until finally, he relaxed back against his pillows.

"I guess you can take him out on a date, but only because he's been sick and good food will make him feel better!" Naruto added quickly. Kakashi smiled and nodded.

"I'll take him to the best restaurant in town," Kakashi promised. Naruto sat back up again, staring threateningly at Kakashi.

"And don't leave me to run with that green dude while you go out!" Kakashi chuckled and raised his hands up defensively.

"Alright, alright, you can invite Sasuke-kun over and the two of you can stay at home."

Naruto huffed and then nodded.

"There's one more thing," Kakashi began. Naruto looked at him warily. "If we tell your dad you came to the hospital, it will make him really worried, so let's just pretend you stayed with Sasuke last night. Okay?" Kakashi asked. Naruto quickly agreed. "Alright, I'm going to go find your doctor and see if you can come home yet." With that, Kakashi left to go find the nurse on duty. He would have dated Iruka even if Naruto hadn't approved, but it made him like the kid a lot more because he had been reasonable about it.

Kakashi checked him out and paid the hospital bill, which set him back a bit, but it really wasn't that big of a deal. As A.N.B.U. Captain, he was making plenty – enough to pay for Naruto's tab at the ramen stand and spoil Iruka rotten, at least. As they walked back towards home, he thought about it some more while Naruto chattered loudly about whatever it was he talked about when he mistakenly assumed people were listening to him. He was making good money and up until now hadn't had anything or anyone to spend it on. He could dip into his plentiful savings so that they could all take a vacation to the hot springs. Iruka would probably like that.

When they reached the apartment, Kakashi interrupted Naruto and told him to be quiet when he went inside, so as not to wake up Iruka.

"I'm going over to your old place to get everything sorted out, so entertain yourself and don't get into any trouble while I'm gone," Kakashi ordered. Not thinking any more about it, he left Naruto at the apartment and headed for Iruka's old building.

It was a good thing he did, because even as he walked up he saw two, bulky movers go into the front office and ask which apartment needed to be emptied out. Quickly, Kakashi intervened.

"Excuse me, but what's going on?" Kakashi asked. The owner of the apartments, who was fat just as Naruto had described him, shrugged dismissively and came around the front desk.

"I got a tenant that's damaged the property and made a lot of noise. Some people complained, so I told him he either had to pay more rent or clear out. I gave him three days to get his stuff out, but he still hasn't come so I called these guys. You interested in the empty room?" he asked brusquely. Kakashi shook his head.

"I'm here to collect his things, actually."

"Good. That means I don't have to pay these guys. I don't need you two anymore, so get out of here," he instructed. The two men started to leave, grumbling all the way. Kakashi followed them out and headed for Iruka's apartment. It was unlocked, but nothing seemed to be missing from inside other than some clothing that had been hastily packed.

Kakashi found two sturdy canvass bags that they had used to bring their belongings from their old place, and quickly packed them full again. He took special care with Naruto's art and the picture of Iruka's parents. When he'd packed the bags, he lifted them with a grunt and staggered outside. Using his transportation jutsu yet again, he re-appeared in a puff of smoke outside his own door. He pushed it open and immediately forgot all about the bags.

Naruto was in the kitchen and he'd made a tremendous mess. He had some kind of batter in his hair, and there were two broken eggs on the kitchen floor. He had turned on the stovetop flame and it was dancing dangerously close to the pages of a cookbook.

"NARUTO!" he shouted, rushing in and extinguishing the flame. Awakened by the shouting, Iruka came stumbling out of the bedroom, his hair a mess and holding up the baggy pajama bottoms with one hand.

"What's going on?" he asked groggily, searching for any danger. Naruto pouted at him.

"I was trying to make you breakfast, Dad. Kakashi said you didn't feel good," Naruto explained, hoping he wasn't going to get into trouble. Iruka smiled and shuffled into the kitchen. With his finger, he scooped a dollop of pancake batter off of Naruto's whiskered cheek and plopped it into his mouth.

"Tastes good so far," he said. Kakashi was not so casual about it.

"He's made a complete mess! And he almost let a cookbook catch on fire!" Iruka gave him an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry, Kakashi, we'll clean it up. He was just trying to do something sweet," Iruka defended. His relief that his son was back, healthy and smiling, was almost contagious. Ignoring Kakashi, Iruka knelt down so that he was on Naruto's level.

"I was a really bad dad this week, wasn't I?" he asked gently. Naruto tried to look tough, but his feelings overcame him and he nodded pitifully. Iruka pulled him into a hug. "I'm sorry, little cat. I'll never do that ever again, and that's a promise."

"Okay," Naruto said. "But it's okay, 'cause Kakashi said you weren't feeling good."

"No, not really, but I feel much, much better now. Why don't you let me finish the pancakes, okay?" Iruka asked, taking the spatula from Naruto as he did so. Naruto nodded and then bounced off to sit at the table. Kakashi pointed at a dishrag.

"Clean up your mess, and then help me bring in your things," he said. Naruto nodded and fetched the dishrag.

"You picked up our things?" Iruka asked. "I thought they'd have been thrown out by now," he said.

"It was a close thing. I got there just in time. I let them keep the furniture, though. It would be a bit cramped if I brought it all here."

"Oh, that's fine," Iruka said, tucking some of his hair behind his ear. He offered Kakashi a gentle smile. From the floor, Naruto scowled up at them making dreamy eyes at each other over his head.

"Ugh! Just kiss already!"

"Naruto!" Iruka exclaimed loudly, his face flushing red.

"What? I'm not a baby anymore, Dad. I know about this kind of stuff now. Kakashi like-likes you. I told him he could take you out on a date, but only if he takes you somewhere really nice."

Iruka looked at Kakashi as if to verify Naruto's outrageous sounding claim. The silver-haired man only grinned underneath his mask.

"We had a little talk this morning," Kakashi explained. Iruka shook his head and smiled, clearly amused.

"Oh, well, I guess I'm the last one to know," he commented. Naruto was watching them hawk-like, unable to hide his curiosity. Before Iruka could make up an excuse, Kakashi stepped forward and kissed Iruka softly on the cheek through his mask.

"Hey!" Naruto protested, "You're supposed to take off your mask!" Iruka laughed.

"I thought it was strange that you were so curious to see a kiss," Iruka said teasingly. Then he glanced down and grinned even wider.

"Kakashi, you stepped in egg."

"Damn it," Kakashi said, picking up his foot and snagging Naruto's dishrag to wipe it off.

"He said a bad word!" Naruto announced unnecessarily. Iruka smirked.

"Yes he did. There's a punishment for swearing, Kakashi," Iruka practically purred. Kakashi grimaced and quickly left the kitchen area. Iruka was taunting him! He expected him to give into lusty thoughts and break his word!

"I have to bring in the bags," he said quickly, hoping to change the subject. Over his pancakes, Iruka snickered. Naruto, a bit oblivious but always happy to see someone other than himself in trouble, grinned as well. "Come help me, brat!" Kakashi said. Still laughing, Naruto came to help him haul the bags inside.

Soon breakfast was done and the three ate the meal happily, as if it were the calm after a mighty storm. Things just seemed better – more promising. Naruto watched his dad and Kakashi interact carefully, and smiled because his dad looked happy again. That was all he had wanted to begin with, and if Kakashi could make his dad happy, then Kakashi could definitely stay.

When the meal was done, Iruka eyed the large bags. Kakashi could almost see the worry start to build behind his eyes again.

"You don't need to find a new place. Stay here," Kakashi suggested. He expected Iruka to protest, but he got a grateful smile instead.

"Thank you, Kakashi," Iruka said. Kakashi only smiled in reply. "Obviously I have some unpacking to do, but what are you two going to do for the day?" Iruka asked as he picked up their dirty dishes.

"Will you train me, Kakashi?" Naruto asked. Kakashi sighed but nodded. He didn't have anything else to do. He'd nearly finished all the available missions they'd had in the mission room the previous week, after all.

"I don't see why not," Kakashi agreed. He stood up and stretched his shoulders a bit.

"Why don't you invite Sasuke-kun along?" Iruka suggested from in the kitchen. He was rinsing off the dishes. "I'll do some unpacking and then bring you all lunch."

"Yay!" Naruto exclaimed, pumping his fist into the air. Kakashi sighed and wondered how he'd gotten stuck watching the brats for the day, but didn't protest. Then an idea occurred to him.

"The kids can come back and stay here, and I can take you on that date tonight," Kakashi suggested. Iruka blushed and didn't immediately say anything. Naruto looked between them and crossed his arms.

"You have to go, Dad. I told him you would," Naruto encouraged. Iruka laughed and turned off the faucet. Kakashi wasn't sure, but he looked almost nervous.

The man could strip and do a lap dance for him without batting an eye, but if you asked him to dinner he got butterflies in his stomach.

_'He's definitely a strange one,'_ Kakashi decided with a slight smile.

"Alright…if you both are going to team up against me," Iruka conceded. Naruto nodded, and then grabbed Kakashi's vest.

"Okay, okay, let's go!"

"Easy, Naruto-kun, I'm coming. I'll take them to the training grounds near the Academy, okay?" Kakashi said as Naruto practically tugged him out the door. Smiling and waving goodbye, Iruka nodded to show he heard him.

"I'll see you soon, and don't let the boys get too roughed up!"

Iruka put away the dishes with a smile tugging at his lips.

It was definitely not how he'd imagined his life to be in Konoha, but he couldn't say the way things were turning out lately was bad.

* * *

When he met them at the training grounds, the two boys looked exhausted as they repeatedly clashed against each other in the big field. Kakashi sat nearby reading one of his porn books. Iruka scowled, and the book hastily disappeared when Kakashi noticed his approach.

"Alright, brats, take a break," Kakashi called out. The two boys broke apart panting. They ran towards him like birds of prey swooping down on a helpless mouse.

"Hey, Dad! I'm STARVED! What did you bring? What did you bring?" Naruto questioned excitedly. Sasuke looked equally hopeful. Smiling, Iruka hauled the basket full of food towards the spot Kakashi was sitting at. He set it down and the boys quickly plopped onto the grass.

"I made a little bit of everything," Iruka said as he unloaded the basket. The boys greedily grabbed the food as soon as Iruka uncovered the plates. Iruka sat next to Kakashi and smiled at the hungry boys devouring most of the picnic.

"I'd like to grab something, but I might loose an arm," Kakashi commented. Iruka flashed him a smile and snagged a covered plate before Sasuke and Naruto could polish it off. He set it on Kakashi's lap and un-tucked the napkin covering it. It was a plate full of Kushiyaki – meat and vegetables on skewers. Happily, Iruka plucked one off the plate and began to munch away. Kakashi grinned like a fool underneath his mask. Something about sharing a plate with Iruka made him feel like he'd just been given a new Icha Icha novel.

Well, it was almost that good.

"This is good, Iruka-san," Sasuke said in between large bites. Iruka smiled at the dark-haired boy and thanked him. His heart went out to Sasuke. No little boy should be left alone all the time – even if he was a valuable ninja prodigy. He had asked Mizuki about why Sasuke hadn't been sent to the orphanage like they had, and apparently it was because he was from a legendary clan and his family was extremely wealthy. He'd inherited enough money that he could continue to live in the village and train as a shinobi without cost to anyone but himself.

It was sad. At least at the orphanage Iruka had felt like he'd become part of a family. He decided then and there that he would make every effort he could to include Sasuke.

The boys reached the last plate and glared at each other over it. Almost immediately it turned into a wrestling match that crushed the picnic basket. Iruka scolded them and gave the plate to Kakashi, grabbing them by their shirt collars and hauling them apart.

"No boys of mine are going to brawl like monkeys over food! I know it's difficult, but try to behave like you weren't raised in a barn, Naruto," Iruka scolded. Sasuke, however, stared up at him with an unreadable expression. Then Iruka realized he had called the boy his own. To reassure Sasuke that it hadn't been a mere slip of the tongue, Iruka ruffled the boy's hair. "You're older, so you have to set a good example, Sasuke-kun," Iruka said. The boy's manner became reserved again. He sighed as if he'd just been given a huge responsibility.

"Enough sparring for you two. Go do some pushups over there," Kakashi gestured at the other side of the field. The boys nodded and started to run off. Naruto came back, however, and gave Iruka a big hug.

"Thanks for lunch, Dad!"

"Yeah, Iruka-san, thanks for lunch," Sasuke repeated. Iruka smiled at the boys.

"You can just call me Iruka, Sasuke-kun, and you're both welcome," Iruka said. After a slight hesitation, Sasuke offered him a small smile and nodded. Once the boys were busy with their exercise, Kakashi stole a quick kiss.

"How's the unpacking going?" Kakashi asked. Iruka picked up the crushed picnic basket with an irritated scowl on his face.

"Oh, it's going fine. So far there's plenty of room for everything," he said absently. "How are the boys doing?" he asked, giving the basket up as a lost cause and staring at Kakashi instead. The taller man grinned happily.

"They're terrible, but they'll get better. What they lack in technique, they make up for with enthusiasm." Iruka smiled and then his look turned sultry.

"I could show you some _enthusiasm_ later tonight…to thank you for all you've done for us," Iruka suggested, leaning in close and idly playing with a frayed corner of his flak jacket. Kakashi narrowed his eyes at him.

"You're just trying to make me break my word, aren't you? You _are _a tease," he said. Iruka flashed him a coy grin and then lowered his eyes again, as if he was fascinated with Kakashi's vest.

"I don't know what's changed, but I just feel differently about it now. Last week was so terrible – I just want to make happier memories," Iruka confessed. Kakashi tenderly tilted his chin upwards.

"We will make better memories – once you've healed and you've had some time. We don't have to rush this."

Iruka gave him an annoyed look.

"What you're trying to do is noble, but I'm telling you I don't need the time. I'm with you now and I want it to be real."

"It's already real. We don't have to have sex to prove something," Kakashi replied. The more Iruka tried to convince him for all the wrong reasons, the more Kakashi's resolve strengthened. He knew he was doing the right thing. Iruka would realize, just as he had realized already, that when they had sex again it should be because they loved each other. Kakashi didn't know if he was to that point yet, but he knew he was much closer than Iruka was.

He didn't like to admit it, but he knew the reality of the situation. For Iruka, he was just a rebound that was letting him move in.

While he had been thinking, Iruka had moved his hands to his hips. That was never a good sign.

"Are you suddenly not attracted to me?" he asked. "Or are you getting if from somebody else?" Iruka pressed. Kakashi sighed. He hadn't wanted it to turn into an argument, especially with the brats just across the field. Not to mention, it was more than a little irritating that Iruka had taken on that possessive tone with him. Hadn't it been just a week before that Iruka had chosen another man over him? True, there were other factors, but that was basically what it boiled down to.

"I am still attracted to you, I just want it to be for the right reasons," Kakashi settled on saying. "I want it to mean something," he added. Iruka's eyebrows knitted together tightly as he tried to figure out what Kakashi was telling him.

"The right reason?" he asked confusedly. Kakashi nodded.

"Exactly."

"Unexplainably, I'm horny for the first time in years and I want you. What's wrong with that reason?" Iruka asked. Kakashi smirked at him.

"It's not unexplainable. You're just not used to someone turning you down when you offer sex."

"Then you're doing it to give me a taste of my own medicine?" Iruka concluded. Kakashi sighed.

"No, but that's not a bad perk. I'm serious about saying you need more time. I want to take you on a real date tonight. Let's focus on that for now, okay?" Kakashi pleaded. Finally, Iruka gave up.

"Alright. You win for now."

"It's not a battle, Iruka," Kakashi replied with a smile. Iruka just huffed and turned away.

Over his shoulder he said, "You're right about that. A battle would require an actual challenge. After you see me tonight, you're going to be singing a different tune, _sweetheart_."

Kakashi couldn't find it in himself to be disappointed that he wasn't going to get sex. Rather, the fact that he'd found a way to make Iruka interested made him absolutely ecstatic.

* * *

**A/N: **A reviewer was worried about how lovey dovey they seemed, and thought it was moving too fast. Hopefully this chapter explains that Iruka's just looking for a rebound. Kakashi's becoming a bit more involved, unfortunately for him. As for Tsubaki and Mizuki, all will be explained. Sometimes I present things in the story that may seem weird, just because you don't know the past behind it yet. Or, it could just be that I'm a confusing writer, lol. Thanks for the reviews as always. Only four more chapters to go! 


	11. The Date ADULT CONTENT

**WARNING: NAUGHTY STUFF IN THIS CHAPTER**

**Chapter 11**  
_"The Date"_

He was putting the mirror to good use. For the millionth time, he changed his shirt. He didn't have a lot of options, but he had a few nice pieces of clothing left from before Naruto had come into his life. He smiled in triumph when he found a sexy, little black sweater that wasn't too risqué. He pulled off the green shirt and slid on the black top. He glared at his reflection in the mirror. His black sweater was mysteriously stained with what looked like peanut butter.

"I've told that boy a million times to stay out of my clothing! Little imp," Iruka scolded as he pulled off the sweater and tossed it in the dirty laundry. "I'm going to make him wash that stain out later," he groused.

His eyes scanned the clothing spread out on the bed. There was a blue top with a V-neck that he liked, but he thought it looked too feminine. He had a green shirt, but he was afraid it was too casual. Lastly, there was a black top that looked like it should only be worn to a funeral.

"Guess it's the blue top, after all. Let's just hope Kakashi's into cross dressers," Iruka mused with a small smile. Idly, he pulled on the garment and examined the embroidery around the cuffs. There was a delicate pattern of silver, intertwining vines just around the edges. He adjusted the shirt on his frame and stared at his reflection critically. Out of the blue, an old memory flashed through his mind.

_Rieko came skidding into the bathroom, disregarding the sign that said it was for males only. _

"Iruka-kun, did you hear?" He turned away from the mirror, where he'd been checking out his outfit, and gave her a blank look.

"Hear what?" he asked. She bit on the corner of her lip nervously and hesitantly approached him.

"That girl…the one that Mizuki knocked up…she killed herself! She jumped off her apartment building and…well, you know. All she left was a note for Mizuki, but no one can find him. He's skipped town."

Iruka blinked and stepped away from the mirror, threading his fingers through his hair. He scowled as he wandered into the bathroom. He splashed some cool water on his face and reached for a towel.

He'd been worried about Mizuki when Rieko had told him that. He hadn't cared that a young, pregnant woman was splattered over some grungy street—an evil part of him almost thought she got what she had deserved. He touched his cheek softly, remembering the slap that Tsubaki had given him.

Was she strong enough to love Mizuki? Bad things happened to the people who loved him. She could probably survive whatever Mizuki dished out just as he had—but was it fair that an innocent baby be forced to bear it as well? Tsubaki had spoken as if she thought Mizuki could change, and had even scolded him for giving up on him, but Iruka knew the truth.

It was a painful lesson that he'd learned the hardest way possible, but Mizuki wasn't going to change. He might behave himself for a while, or clean up his act enough to get something he wanted, but he was _not_ going to change.

What would it take before Tsubaki learned that lesson, too? Would he beat her? Would he hurt their innocent child before she learned?

It had been too late for the first girl, but it was not too late for Tsubaki. Iruka couldn't let it rest on his soul if he didn't at least try to warn her. His date forgotten, Iruka left the apartment as if in a daze. He didn't know where she lived, but he could start in the market and ask around. The streets of Konoha were relatively empty. There were a few people shuffling around, going about their daily business, and Iruka approached all of them to ask if they knew where he could find her. Finally, one man told him that she sold vegetables in the market, and she would probably be there all afternoon.

Iruka thanked the man and took off. He found her booth in the market and ignored the glare she gave him as he approached. Her anger towards him reminded him of the irrational anger he'd had towards the first girl Mizuki had knocked up. Quite suddenly, Iruka felt like he could see the situation a bit more clearly. He forced his expression into a sympathetic smile. Confused by his tactic, Tsubaki's glare faltered.

"Hello, Tsubaki," Iruka greeted. She sniffed and turned her head away dismissively. Undaunted, Iruka pretended as if he were interested in buying some of her vegetables.

"What do you want?" She finally asked, unable to stand the silence. Iruka put down the tomato he'd been inspecting and looked at her confidently.

"Mizuki has cheated on you, but you're angry with me instead of him. How do you know that he even told me about you?" Iruka asked, cutting straight to the point. Her eyes widened and then she glared.

"Quit trying to play mind games with me. What do you want?" she practically hissed in anger. Iruka merely sighed.

"I just want to talk to you. You know, it wasn't too many years ago that I was the one in your position. Mizuki cheated on me all the time with women, but I rationalized it by saying they gave him something I couldn't. Then I found out he cheated on me with men, too. Eventually, he left me for a woman."

"I know Mizuki's had a difficult past," Tsubaki interrupted. Iruka just silenced her with a glare.

"That woman got pregnant, and Mizuki left her. It upset her so much that she took a nosedive off a fifteen-story building and killed herself and her baby. Mizuki skipped town after that," Iruka said. Tsubaki's delicate hand moved to cover her mouth, and Iruka noticed a vivid, purple bruise barely hidden by her sleeve. Frowning, he reached for her hand and pulled it towards him, pushing up the sleeve to reveal the bruise in its entirety. "Now he's even getting violent with women," Iruka remarked with disgust. Tsubaki jerked her hand back and winced at the tender bruise.

"You could be lying…you just want him for yourself! And this bruise isn't from him!"

Wordlessly, Iruka pushed up his own sleeve to show the bruise marks that wrapped around his own forearm – roughly in the shape of a handprint. The bruise was a sickly green, slowly fading.

"Well this bruise _is_ from him, and if you care at all about the health of your baby, you won't stay with someone that's abusive to other people. What makes you think he won't hurt your child?"

"Mizuki is excited about the baby! He wants to be a dad!" Iruka shook his head in denial.

"Maybe he feels guilty for what happened to the first one? Or maybe, more likely, he realizes that once he has a baby to hold over your head, there's nothing that you can deny him. He only went back to you because I gave up, and he knew it! All Mizuki wants is someone to play his game with – someone to hurt, because he likes making other people feel pain, and someone to pity him when he wants it. I didn't care anymore, and I didn't want to play his games. That's the only reason he wanted you back!" Iruka accused, starting to loose his temper. Tsubaki glanced around hastily, noticing that people were beginning to eavesdrop.

"This isn't the place to have this conversation," she said quietly.

"Then come to my place. We'll talk more," Iruka said. Tsubaki looked away noncommittally.

"I don't want to cause trouble between Mizuki and I…" she trailed off. Iruka glared.

"I have a little boy, too, you know. His name is Naruto. The worst moment of my life came when he saw all the bruises and cuts Mizuki had left on me last week, and asked me why someone was hurting me, and I cursed at him. I cursed at my own child. You can't even imagine how horrible I felt. That was when I started to realize something about Mizuki. I can't love him if it means I have to hurt my son. My child comes first, always, no exceptions. Agree that you'll talk with me more, please," Iruka begged. Tsubaki's eyes had filled with tears that Iruka gently brushed away with his thumb. He was surprised that she allowed him to do so. Weakly, with her arms wrapped around her tummy, she nodded.

"Where…where do you live? I'll come tomorrow morning."

Smiling in relief, Iruka gave her the address. They stood staring at each other for a moment. A million unspoken words hung between them. Tsubaki laughed off the awkward moment and wiped absently at fresh tears.

"Well, are you going to buy some vegetables or not?" Iruka smiled at her and picked up the tomato he'd been bruising earlier.

"I'll take this one," he said, fishing some change out of his pocket. She waved him off with a watery smile.

"First one's free," she replied. Iruka nodded and returned the smile.

"Thanks, and I'll see you tomorrow."

"Goodbye, Iruka-san," she replied quietly. Iruka left then, his heart feeling much lighter.

The smile fell from his face when he realized it was almost dark and Kakashi would be home with the boys. That meant it was almost time for their date.

It was a scary thought. His stomach suddenly felt like it was full of carnivorous butterflies. He squeezed the tomato in his hand a little harder than he should have and felt it turn mushy. Shaking his head at his own unreasonable nervousness, Iruka hurried back to the house so he could finish getting ready.

* * *

Kakashi read in an attempt to drown out the bickering of the two boys trudging along behind him. He wondered what Iruka would be wearing. Would he have his hair up or down?

"No, I beat you, Sasuke!"

Maybe he'd wear half of it up and leave the rest of it down. He hadn't seen him wear it like that yet.

"Shut up, you idiot! Maybe if I was bigger than the Hokage Mountain and didn't move, you might have a chance of actually hitting me."

Maybe Iruka would wear really tight pants. He might not be able to resist if he could see that perfect ass in form fitting pants…

"Oh yeah? Well take THIS!"

"BOYS!" Iruka's voice boomed from the now open door. Naruto froze with his fist cocked back, and Sasuke paused with his leg aimed to kick. "I could hear your squabbling from inside the apartment! Naruto, go to the bathroom and start filling the tub! I could smell you both from inside the apartment, too," Iruka scolded. The boys scurried inside, but Kakashi remained still, his book hanging limply by his side. Iruka shot him a questioning look.

"Well, were you just going to let them go at it?" he scolded in a very 'motherly' tone. Kakashi dumbly shook his head 'no,' his mouth hanging open under his mask. Iruka huffed and shot him a disbelieving look. "Yeah, well, I think you were so caught up in your dirty book that you forgot you had kids to watch," Iruka scolded with a sigh. "Come on in and clean up some. At this rate, once I feed the boys and get them tucked in, it's going to be too late for us to go out." With that, Iruka turned to go tend to the boys and didn't even realize that he'd left Kakashi drooling in the doorway, struck speechless.

After a few moments, Kakashi shook his head a bit and managed to regain some of his wits.

Iruka looked _perfect_.

"Kakashi, clean off Sasuke's cuts for me, will you?" Iruka shouted from the bathroom. Moving automatically, Kakashi picked Sasuke up and set him on the kitchen counter. The adorable little boy looked mildly horrified that someone had just picked him up as if he were a toddler. Kakashi didn't notice. He pealed the backing off of a plain bandage and absently stuck it onto Sasuke. The dark haired boy glared at him.

"Hey! Pay attention! I'm not even cut there!" Kakashi looked down, almost startled, and then his eye curved happily.

"Ah, my mistake!" Smile still in place, Kakashi heartlessly jerked off the bandage. Sasuke's eyes widened and then he growled.

"I'm going to shoot a fireball at you if you don't quit acting so weird," he threatened. Kakashi glanced down at him and patted his head.

"One day you'll understand, Sasuke-kun," Kakashi said in a wiser-than-thou tone. "Don't you think Iruka looked very nice?" he asked seconds later, a dreamy look in his eye.

"I think you're crazy," Sasuke replied. The little boy snatched the bandage out of Kakashi's hand and hopped off the counter. "I'd rather have Iruka do it," he said while shooting Kakashi a distrustful look. Oblivious, Kakashi continued to daydream in the kitchen.

Sasuke carried his bandage to Iruka, who was using a washrag to clean off Naruto's cuts with alcohol. The blonde boy was wincing and pouting and generally acting like a crybaby. When he saw Sasuke come in, he immediately stuck his bottom lip out and tried to act like it didn't bother him. Sasuke stripped out of his dirty training clothing, just like Naruto had done, and sat beside the blonde on the side of the tub. Iruka glanced at his cuts, still dirty and bleeding.

"I want you to do it," Sasuke said dismissively. Iruka looked surprised, but merely nodded. He cleaned one last cut on Naruto's back and then told him to get in the tub. The blonde boy jumped in with a huge splash and a loud 'whoopee!'

Iruka, accustomed to such behavior, managed to dodge in time. Sasuke, however, was soaked. His long hair collapsed around his face and he looked half-drowned. Naruto pointed and laughed. Growling, Sasuke turned to retaliate but Iruka gently caught his arm and began cleaning up his scrapes. With a smile, Iruka pushed Sasuke's wet bangs out of his eyes.

"Save it for the training ground, tough stuff," Iruka said with a smile. Sasuke pouted, and Iruka realized why all the little girls liked Sasuke—he was definitely a cute kid. With his battle wounds cleaned, Sasuke hopped into the tub as well and preceded to splash an unsuspecting Naruto with a wave of soapy water.

"Dad, where are my bath toys?" Naruto asked. Sasuke shot him a disbelieving look.

"We're too old for toys in the bath, idiot," he said. Iruka gave Sasuke a disapproving look.

"Don't call people names, Sasuke-kun. It's not nice. You wouldn't want someone calling you that." Iruka pulled a small basket out of the cabinet where the towels were neatly folded. Inside there were four, cheap little wooden boats. Each one was painted a different color, but a few were chipped from years of rough play at Naruto's hands. Iruka dumped the little boats into the bath and left the boys to it. "The shampoo is there, along with some rags. Don't forget to wash your hair," Iruka reminded as he left the bathroom. Kakashi was in the bedroom, getting ready for their date. He'd changed out of his uniform and was wearing some nice black pants and a blue sweater that matched the color of his mask and forehead protector. Iruka whistled and flashed him a smile.

"You clean up nice, Hatake," he complimented. Then, a hesitant look came into his eyes. "Do I…look okay?" he asked. Kakashi tugged his mask down and pulled him into a greedy kiss. When he pulled back, Iruka was almost breathless. Iruka chuckled. "I guess that answers my question. You don't think the top is too girly?"

"The shirt's perfect." Kakashi punctuated the statement with a kiss to his shoulder. "The pants are perfect." Kakashi pinched his butt. "You're perfect." Iruka got another kiss.

"I'm nervous," Iruka suddenly confessed, staring up at Kakashi's handsome face. The taller man started to say something in reply, but Sasuke shouted from in the bathroom and both men were distracted.

"Naruto, it's a WARSHIP! You can't just shoot it down with some puny guns!" Naruto's reply came just as loudly.

"Alright, so my ship has cannons. BOOM! I killed it. Look, your little people are floating in the water. Too bad my cannon blew up your lifeboats," Naruto said in a matter-of-fact tone of voice. Iruka and Kakashi could hear Sasuke growling even from the bedroom.

"This game is STUPID!" Sasuke shouted. Iruka snorted.

"I better go break that fight up. Will you go re-heat the dinner I made for the boys?" Kakashi nodded and went to do his task, a small smile on his face. Naruto's imagination was something else.

He had barely pulled the plates out of the microwave when Naruto and Sasuke came streaking in.

Literally, they were streaking. Iruka was chasing after them with towels. Naruto was giggling loudly and Sasuke had a mischievous little grin on his face. They plopped their bare butts into the dining room seats and tried to pretend like nothing was wrong with them eating dinner naked. They obviously thought the joke was hilarious, because they kept snickering and darting glances at Iruka to see his reaction. Obligingly, he made a fuss.

"You boys are crazy, and you're dripping water everywhere!" He draped the towels over the boys and roughly toweled their wet heads. Kakashi set their plates onto the table, not really caring if they ate naked as long as they hurried up with it.

He wanted Iruka all to himself.

The boys, Sasuke included, were laughing at Iruka's pretend scolding in between wolfing down bites of their dinner. While they ate, Iruka went to fetch some pajamas. At least the little monsters ate fast. Iruka had them dressed in their pajamas in record time and then shuffled them into the bedroom. Kakashi watched from the doorway as Iruka pulled the covers back and the boys crawled in, smiling contentedly as he pulled the covers up around them and tucked them in tightly.

"Do you want to hear a story?" Iruka asked. He was surprised when Naruto shook his head.

"I like Sasuke's stories better!"

"What?" Iruka asked in mock surprise. He tickled Naruto mercilessly for a few moments and then kissed his forehead. He gave Sasuke a goodnight kiss as well and stood.

"Alright then, but don't stay up too late talking. You both better be sound asleep when we get back, okay?"

"Bye, Dad! Have fun!" Iruka smiled at the boys and walked towards Kakashi. The silver-haired man gave him a smile through his mask and turned off the lights in the boys' room. He started to leave, and then remembered something.

"Don't make a mess in the kitchen if you get hungry, Naruto," Kakashi warned, his single, revealed eye glaring menacingly. The blonde boy didn't miss a beat.

"Alright, but don't go kissy-facing my dad!"

"Naruto!" Iruka scolded, but Kakashi was already pulling the door closed.

"You ready?" he asked Iruka. The brunette looked worried, but he nodded.

"Do you think the boys will be alright?" he asked as Kakashi locked up the front door.

"Don't worry. I set some traps. Anyone that tries to break in will get a nasty surprise."

"Oh, okay then. So…where are we going?" Kakashi smiled at him and interlocked their hands.

"There's a restaurant near the Hokage tower that specializes in exotic foods. They've got a little bit of everything. How does that sound?"

"Sounds great," Iruka replied, smiling nervously. The two of them left the apartment building hand in hand and enjoyed the fresh night air. The wind was getting cooler, as the winter months weren't too far off, and Kakashi wrapped his arm around Iruka's shoulders when he saw the other man shiver. Iruka leaned into him and breathed his scent in deeply. Kakashi was wearing nice cologne.

"You smell good," Iruka said, tilting his face up as he did so. Kakashi grinned down at him.

"Thank you. I didn't check you," he said with a grin. Before Iruka knew it, Kakashi was embracing him and nuzzling his masked nose against Iruka's bare neck. Iruka hadn't worn cologne, but Kakashi could smell scented soap. Iruka laughed and let Kakashi sniff at him like a big, excited puppy.

"Alright, alright—that's enough of that!" Iruka said when Kakashi's hands began to wander. Kakashi pulled back, but not before getting in a good squeeze. Iruka rolled his eyes.

"You're incorrigible."

"Is that a big word for sexy?" Kakashi asked teasingly. Iruka laughed.

"No, it's a big word for troublesome."

The streets were dimly lit, and the night sky was crowded with stars. Kakashi caught Iruka looking up at the sky admiringly.

"It's pretty tonight, isn't it?" Kakashi asked. Iruka nodded.

"Konoha is gorgeous. It's so clean and tidy. Sometimes it almost doesn't seem real. I mean, everything's been crazy since I came here, but right now things are good. I feel good. I'm glad to be here with you," Iruka said sincerely. Kakashi squeezed the smaller man's shoulders.

"Konoha's better now that you're here," Kakashi replied. A thoughtful look came onto Iruka's face, and the brunette studied his feet as if fascinated.

"I talked to Tsubaki today," he said quietly. Kakashi rubbed his back encouragingly.

"How did that go?" he asked. Iruka looked up again and sighed.

"It went okay. She agreed to talk to me again. I'm worried about her." Kakashi nodded.

"I'm worried, too. I wasn't sure how you wanted to handle it, though. She thinks she's doing the right thing by staying with him. What do I know? She might be right. I'm not an expert on love by any stretch of the imagination," Kakashi said. Iruka peered up at him and then kissed his masked jaw.

"Your instinct told you Mizuki was trouble and you were right. Whether she loves him or not doesn't matter. She has someone else to consider now. I hurt Naruto because of Mizuki, and it made me realize that I can't have them both. Naruto comes first, you know?" Kakashi smiled underneath his mask and stopped them. He wrapped Iruka up in a big hug.

"You're a good dad, and I think you're doing the right thing. Mizuki let you go a long time ago. Don't waste your precious heart on him."

"I know. It's just…really hard. I know it's stupid of me to still care—I know that! I just…"

"You're a loyal person to the people you love, and it's hard for you to let Mizuki go. I understand that. It's just going to take time."

"I just keep wondering what's going to happen to him. It breaks my heart to think of him living all alone and miserable," Iruka confessed. Then, he looked up at Kakashi with big eyes. "I'm sorry that I'm talking about all this. We're supposed to be having a nice date."

Kakashi replied by tugging his mask down and kissing him gently.

"It makes me happy when you confide in me. I want to help you get through this, so no more worrying, okay?" Kakashi asked. Iruka nodded. They'd reached the restaurant. Despite the fact that it was a Saturday night, it didn't look very crowded.

Kakashi gave his name to the waitress in the front and held Iruka's hand as they walked to their table. A few of the other guests stared at them.

"Kakashi," Iruka whispered, "if you don't want to be so open about us you don't have to be." Kakashi just held his hand a little tighter and pulled out his chair for him.

"Let them stare. I read porn in public. I'm not overly concerned with their opinion of me."

"Good point," Iruka conceded with a smile. He looked at the menu absently, but then his eyes widened. "Kakashi, this food is too expensive!" Kakashi reached for his hand across the table and kissed the back of it. Iruka blushed attractively.

"You deserve it, so order whatever you want," Kakashi said. Iruka felt his heartbeat speed up as Kakashi looked at him as if he were royalty or something. There was a moment where Iruka simply got lost staring at Kakashi's handsome face – picturing the features he knew were hidden by cloth. The silver haired ninja grinned under his mask and glanced back down at the menu. The waitress came and asked what they would like to drink. Kakashi ordered some expensive alcohol. "I think you'll like it," he said to Iruka. "It's fruity and kind of bubbly."

Iruka grinned and blushed again. He couldn't stop blushing! Kakashi smiled teasingly.

"You're so cute when you blush," he complimented.

"Quit teasing me!" Iruka replied, his cheeks bright red. Iruka's eyes narrowed when Kakashi didn't stop grinning at him like an idiot, and he was reminded of his earlier mission. His blush faded as he pretended to be studying the menu. Underneath the table, hidden by the long white tablecloth, Iruka slipped his foot out of his sandal and teasingly brushed it up Kakashi's calf. Thankfully, the table was fairly small so it wasn't hard for him to reach.

Kakashi stopped grinning. He gulped.

"Iruka…" he began. Iruka glanced up obliviously, big brown eyes wide and innocent.

"Hmm?" he asked. Kakashi scooted his chair a bit and coughed into his hand. Iruka just kept smiling at him. He slid his foot over Kakashi's knee and up between his legs. His wandering toes stopped just short of Kakashi's crotch. Acting completely oblivious, Iruka cocked his head and studied his menu. "Any recommendations for what I should order?" he asked. Kakashi swallowed thickly. Iruka watched as the ninja's hand dropped underneath the table. He smirked, expecting Kakashi to push his foot away, unable to handle the stimulation.

"It just depends…on what you like," Kakashi practically purred. His hand wrapped securely around Iruka's foot and his fingers began to work their magic. Iruka's jaw dropped a little at the sensuous touches on his foot. Iruka closed his mouth and bit on his lip.

"I think you should order for me. You obviously _know_ just what I like," Iruka replied, his voice full of heat. He gave Kakashi a sultry look over the candles on the table and reached for the man's other hand. He began to trail his fingers over Kakashi's palm, drawing abstract designs with the tips of his fingers. Kakashi finished with Iruka's foot and began to rub his ankle. Iruka moaned – just loudly enough so that Kakashi would be the only one to hear.

Kakashi's hand stilled when he heard the moan, and he scooted his chair closer to the table. It pushed Iruka's foot against his arousal.

Iruka smirked. He let his foot slide away, down one of Kakashi's thighs and then his calf. The waitress returned with their drinks. Kakashi shifted uncomfortably, and Iruka's smirk turned into a grin. Iruka thanked the waitress.

"Are you ready to order yet?" she asked. Iruka arched an eyebrow at Kakashi. The silver-haired ninja sat up a little straighter and both hands returned to the tabletop. He rattled off the name of some hard to pronounce dish. The waitress jotted it down and then left. Shooting him a dirty look, Kakashi began to pour the alcohol into the little cups.

"Tease," he mumbled under his breath. Iruka caressed Kakashi's hand when the man passed him his drink.

"It's only teasing if I don't plan to carry through." Iruka took a long sip of his drink. He placed the little cup in front of him and flirtatiously tugged his long hair over his shoulder. His fingers slipped and twisted the locks with practiced ease. Kakashi watched hypnotized. "I definitely plan to finish what I start with you, Kakashi," Iruka purred.

"Hmm…we'll see. I still don't think you're ready," Kakashi replied, crossing his arms over his chest. Iruka stopped playing with his hair, flicking it back over his shoulder. Iruka turned off the seductive vibe almost instantly.

"Will you show me where the bathroom is?" Iruka asked. Kakashi had managed to get control of himself by that point, so he stood and pulled Iruka's chair out for him again, a bit confused by the abrupt mood change. With his hand on the small of Iruka's back, he guided his date through the tables and towards the back, where there was a small bathroom. No one was waiting in line. Kakashi stopped, but Iruka glanced to see that they hadn't been noticed before he grabbed Kakashi's hand and pulled him in, too.

He locked the door ominously behind him and stalked forward, pushing Kakashi a bit roughly in the chest. Kakashi felt the bathroom wall against his back. Iruka pulled his mask down and kissed him passionately. Iruka's hands slipped under Kakashi's sweater and roamed up and down bare chest, paying extra attention to his nipples. When Iruka broke the kiss, he trailed his lips up Kakashi's jaw to whisper in his ear.

"I'm going to suck you off, now. I'm going to unbutton your pants and slide this tongue," Iruka licked his ear playfully, "all over you. I'm going to swallow when you cum in my throat, and its going to taste better than dinner. Are you hard for me, Kakashi?"

The dirty talk went straight to his cock. Kakashi groaned and forgot all about any noble plans to give Iruka time. He thrust against Iruka's belly and turned his head, trying to catch Iruka's elusive lips in a kiss. Iruka dodged his mouth and showered his jaw in kisses lighter than the brush of butterfly wings. The kisses went down his neck, over his bunched up mask and sweater, around his nipples…and then a hot tongue slid out and dragged wetly down his tensed stomach. Iruka's hands undid Kakashi's pants while his tongue swirled around belly button. Kakashi arched when his pants were yanked away and Iruka's pretty mouth wrapped hungrily around his erection. He pushed his forehead protector back and stared intensely at the gorgeous image of Iruka on his knees in the posh bathroom, powerfully sucking him off. He bit his lip to keep from moaning out loud. The heady rush of chakra into his Sharingan, combined with the talented tongue massaging his dick, finished him quickly. He came into Iruka's waiting mouth, watching entranced as his boyfriend caught every drop, swallowing it like it was water and he'd been very, very thirsty.

There was a knock on the bathroom door. Kakashi jumped. Iruka grinned at his reaction and acted as cool as a cucumber. Kakashi watched stunned as Iruka tucked him back into his pants and smoothed out his sweater. Iruka pecked his lips, and Kakashi thought he caught a taste of himself, but he couldn't be sure. Iruka fixed his mask for him and then turned on the faucet to wash his hands. Kakashi was still frozen in place, trying to wrap his mind around the fact that he'd just gotten a blowjob in a public bathroom while someone stood outside.

Iruka gave him an expectant look.

"Wash your hands. Someone's waiting," he reminded. Kakashi mechanically washed his hands, unable to tear his eyes away from Iruka as he checked his reflection and made sure his hair hadn't fallen out of place. When he was satisfied with his appearance, he shot Kakashi an irritated look and turned off the water for him. "You're clean. Come on."

Iruka unlocked the bathroom and opened it just as a pretty, dark haired woman was about to knock. She saw right over Iruka's shoulder and her dark, red lips formed a surprised 'o' shape.

"Kakashi-san?" she asked a bit dumbly. Her unique eyes darted back and forth between the two of them, and then a brilliant blush darkened her cheeks. Kakashi hastily left, passing her as he did so.

"Hello Kurenai-san. Enjoy your dinner," Kakashi chirruped with a ridiculously pleased expression on his face. Kurenai didn't reply.

As they returned to their table, their food was being brought out. Kakashi didn't stop smiling the entire meal, and he kept drinking cup after cup of alcohol. When they were almost done eating, Iruka snorted at his expression.

"You look like Naruto when he gets a new toy," Iruka commented. Kakashi gave him the grin he saved for particularly delicious scenes in Icha Icha.

"I just can't believe you did that!" Kakashi practically squealed. Iruka laughed.

"Yeah, well, I'm full of surprises. I think you drank too much during dinner," Iruka assessed. Kakashi happily paid the bill and rushed to pull out Iruka's chair. He was acting ridiculously happy, and his ear-to-ear grin was infectious. Once they were out of the restaurant, Kakashi actually picked Iruka up and twirled him. Trapped in Kakashi's arms, Iruka could only laugh as Kakashi pushed him against the side of a building.

"I think I love you," Kakashi said with a big, dopey smile. Iruka winced a bit at the words and the smell of alcohol on Kakashi's breath, but he tugged Kakashi's mask down and kissed him sweetly.

"That's the blowjob talking, sweetheart. Let's go home, okay?" Iruka blinked and when he opened his eyes, Kakashi had transported them directly to their bedroom. Iruka had been feeling a little tipsy as well, but the sudden jutsu made him sober up. Kakashi, however, was still grinning and swaying a bit unsteadily. Iruka managed to get him to sit on the bed by crawling into his lap. "I can't believe it. You're a giggly drunk. It's not very manly at all," Iruka said with a pout. Kakashi smiled broadly up at him, his eyes looking a little vacant.

"I'm man enough for you," Kakashi said in a deep, husky voice. The mood changed almost instantly. Iruka was turned on by the promise, and he started to lean in for a kiss.

Then Kakashi giggled. Irritated, Iruka pushed him down onto the bed and kissed him passionately.

"Sober up. I'm going to check on the kids and then I'll be back. I expect you to be naked for me by then, got it?" Kakashi nodded, his revealed eye crinkling happily. His tongue darted out and he licked the tip of Iruka's nose. Iruka snorted. "Maybe I should just let you sleep this off." As Iruka came to that conclusion, Kakashi was rolling around on the bed in an attempt to get his sweater off.

Iruka shook his head.

"Yeah…I'm definitely not going to have sex with you when you're like that. Go to sleep, Kakashi." Kakashi mumbled something into his sweater. Taking pity on him, Iruka crawled onto the bed and helped Kakashi free himself from the garment.

The incoherent mumbling turned into, "Don't leave me, 'Ruka! We'll have lots and lots of sex. I promise!" Another giggle. Iruka smiled in amusement and guided Kakashi's head down to the pillow. Next he unbuttoned the man's pants and tugged them off, along with his sandals. Kakashi popped the elastic in his boxers. "I love these boxers!" he chirruped. "They're lucky!"

"Oh, definitely," Iruka agreed, not really paying attention. He situated the covers and pulled them over Kakashi. "I don't know if you can hold your alcohol or not, so I'm going to get you a trashcan just in case."

"Okay!" Kakashi replied happily. Iruka fetched the trashcan and left it beside the bed. Then he went to check on the kids. They were sleeping deeply. Naruto had his leg slung over Sasuke and was using him as a big body pillow. Iruka smiled and softly closed the door.

"Iruka!" Kakashi called out from the other bedroom. Rolling his eyes, Iruka went back to him and closed the door behind him.

"Shh! You'll wake up the boys!" Iruka warned. Kakashi reached out a hand to him.

"Come 'ere. I want to play with your hair." Iruka began to strip out of his clothes and toe out of his sandals. Completely naked, he climbed into bed and straddled Kakashi. He pulled out his hair tie and shook out his hair. He fluffed it a bit and then leaned over, kissing Kakashi slowly. His hair tickled the other man's cheeks and chest. Kakashi didn't kiss well when he was drunk. His eye peered up at Iruka curiously, almost like he didn't even know where he was or whom he was with. Iruka sighed and gave up. Making sure Kakashi was on the outside in case he needed to puke, Iruka crawled under the covers.

"Hold me," he said. Vulnerable to suggestion, Kakashi nodded happily.

"Okay," he replied, wrapping Iruka up in his arms. Maybe it was the alcohol—Iruka always became emotional when he drank—but suddenly he felt sad. He hugged Kakashi tightly.

"Baby, what's wrong?" Kakashi asked. The pet name reminded Iruka of Mizuki, and his reply was sharper than it should have been.

"Don't call me that," Iruka ordered. Kakashi was obviously hurt. He craned his head forward to look Iruka in the eyes.

"I'm sorry, 'Ruka. Are you mad because I'm drunk? I'll never drink again, promise."

Iruka sighed. "It's not that, sweetheart. Don't worry about it."

"Do you want to have sex?" Kakashi asked, managing to smile instead of giggle, at the very least. Iruka pouted.

"It would take my mind off things, but I doubt you'd even know where to stick it in this state."

Kakashi grinned at him like the solution was obvious. He spread his arms out on the pillows in a dramatic fashion.

"Then you stick me!"

Iruka dismissed it, then considered it, and finally smirked.

"Actually, I think that's the best thing I've heard all night," Iruka purred wickedly. He found Kakashi's lube in the nightstand drawer and was surprised to see that his cock liked the idea, too. He'd fucked girls before, but he'd never topped during sex with a man. Mizuki had been too much of a control freak, and all his clients had been tops as well. Kakashi had been the first of his lovers to suggest it, and the unknown (sexually speaking) had always interested him.

Kakashi watched him obliviously as he slathered lube onto his erection and then on his fingers.

"I've never done this before," Kakashi confessed with a secretive grin. Iruka just grinned.

"Neither have I. Now take off your boxers and spread your legs for me, sweetheart," Iruka ordered with a cocky grin. Kakashi obeyed.

"I like it when you talk dirty," Kakashi mused with a smile, playing with himself a bit once his boxers were off. Iruka kissed his cheek to avoid the alcohol on his breath and trailed a finger over Kakashi's opening. With a mischievous look, he stuck it in slowly, watching as Kakashi's eye widened and his jaw fell open.

"You're so tight—you really are a virgin. I'm just using one finger now, but it feels big, doesn't it?"

"Ughhh…"

"It's good that you're so relaxed, because otherwise it would be hard when I put in this second finger. Can I keep going?" Iruka asked. Kakashi nodded enthusiastically and even bucked weakly towards his fingers. Smiling, Iruka began to scissor his fingers. He used his other hand to massage Kakashi's cock. The ninja was becoming aroused, despite the strange sensation in his ass, and he moaned encouragingly.

Two fingers became three, and one finger found Kakashi's prostate. The man practically jumped off the bed. He began panting, grinding his ass onto Iruka's fingers in neediness. It was hot as hell, and Iruka was high on the feeling of being in complete control for once.

"More, 'Ruka, please," Kakashi begged. Iruka moaned at the words and pulled his fingers out. He replaced them with his dick and began to fuck Kakashi in earnest. He pulled one of Kakashi's long legs over his shoulder to get a better angle and then hit the nail on the head. Iruka stuffed his fingers into Kakashi's mouth to muffle his moans. Over and over he pounded into Kakashi's prostate until the man exploded with his erection practically untouched. Iruka followed after, grunting in surprise when his climax was practically jerked out of his gut. He collapsed weakly onto Kakashi, uncaring of their mess. Almost instantly, they were both sound asleep.

Iruka woke up when his shoulder was shaken.

"Iruka! Iruka, wake up!" Kakashi growled. Iruka blinked his eyes open and yawned hugely. He winced as he felt his skin pull on his stomach. He and Kakashi were stuck together.

The memory of the pervious night flashed in his mind and he grinned like the cat that ate the canary. Kakashi closed his eyes resignedly.

"I was hoping my ass was sore for another reason, but I guess that grin says otherwise."

Iruka burst out laughing.

"What were you hoping happened?" Iruka teased. Kakashi groaned and a blush appeared on his pale cheeks. "Actually, Kakashi, are you certain you're only a top? Because the second you were tipsy…"

"Alright, that's enough out of you!" Kakashi said sternly. Iruka couldn't resist. He licked the tip of Kakashi's nose and then burst out laughing. It took Kakashi a moment, but then he remembered. His blush worsened. "You know what? You should be ashamed of yourself for taking advantage of me while I was drunk."

"Ha! Hate to be the one to tell you, but you begged for it, sweetheart. I just helped you out, because I'm a nice boyfriend like that," Iruka said. Kakashi glared at him in response. With a smile, Iruka added, "don't make me lick your nose again. Stop pouting. You liked it."

"I did not!" Kakashi replied. Iruka faked confusion.

"Then…when you were moaning and begging me to talk dirty…that was what you look like when you're not enjoying yourself?"

"I'm not the girl!" Kakashi finally snapped. Iruka growled and separated from him quite painfully.

"Yeah, well neither am I! That was a dumb thing to say, Kakashi. Quit being such an ass just because I fucked yours." Iruka walked into the bathroom, obviously irritated. Kakashi scowled.

"If you're not the girl, then why'd you wear such a girly shirt last night, huh?" Kakashi called out childishly. Iruka shot him the finger over his shoulder and slammed the bathroom door. Kakashi stood up hastily and opened the door. He didn't sense the kids' chakra, so they must have gone outside to play. They could fight as loud as they wanted to. In the bathroom, Iruka glared up at him challengingly.

"Get out!" he half-shouted. Kakashi shut the door behind him, and crossed his arms over his chest.

"I need the shower more than you do," he replied, trying to make Iruka see sense. The brunette only turned on his heel and stepped into the tub. He pulled the shower curtain closed.

Kakashi yanked it open.

"Iruka!" Kakashi shouted. When Iruka ignored him and even turned on the water, Kakashi got in, too, tossing his forehead protector out into the bathroom carelessly.

"Ugh! Get out, Kakashi! I'm not showering with you!"

"Looks like that's what you're doing to me. Get out if you don't like it."

"You're a real asshole sometimes, you know that?" Iruka hissed, reaching around Kakashi for the shampoo. "Are you really that insecure about your manhood that you can't take a little backdoor action?"

"I didn't like it, alright? Shut up about it already!" Kakashi replied dangerously. Iruka huffed in reply, his lips drawn into a thin line. Kakashi was washing the dried spunk off his stomach and using his peripheral vision to watch Iruka pour an enormous glob of shampoo into his hand. "You're using too much," Kakashi said waspishly. Iruka looked up at him in disbelief.

"Seriously? Shut the hell up, Kakashi. It's my shampoo," Iruka snapped. Kakashi realized with a start that it really was Iruka's shampoo. In fact, there were now more things in his bathroom than he was used to seeing. Two shampoo bottles, two bars of soap, wood toy boats on one end of the tub, and a veritable rainbow of shower gels, strange lotions, and brightly colored scrubs. It suddenly made him feel unsettled.

"What the hell is all that stuff for?" Kakashi asked, gesturing at the five or six bottles cluttering up one of the little shower selves that had previously been empty. Iruka just glared at him. When Iruka didn't answer, Kakashi continued taunting him. "A real man doesn't use all that crap," Kakashi explained snidely. Iruka practically exploded.

"A real man doesn't giggle when he gets drunk!" With that, Iruka shoved Kakashi aside and began to rinse out his long hair. Kakashi wanted to stay mad, he really did, but Iruka looked hot. They'd already broken his no-sex rule, so it couldn't hurt to take advantage of the situation just a little.

"Okay, I'm sorry. Forgive me?" he asked insincerely as he tried to brush a hand up Iruka's side. The brunette pulled away from his touch and glared at him with shampoo dripping everywhere.

"Don't say something you don't mean! If being bottom made you uncomfortable, that's all you had to say. You didn't have to insult me in the process! Now, not even seconds after insulting me, you want me to spread my legs for you!"

Kakashi began to feel guilty. "When you put it like that…" he trailed off, unable to express himself. Iruka finished rinsing his hair. Worried that Iruka was going to get out of the shower, Kakashi trapped the other man in his arms. Thankfully, Iruka didn't resist. Kakashi pulled him out of the main spray and gave him the puppy dog eyes. Iruka tried to resist, but he ended up sighing in resignation.

"Apologize, and this time put some effort into it," Iruka ordered. Acting appropriately remorseful, Kakashi wrapped him up in a hug.

"I'm sorry for calling you girly…and for lying about not enjoying last night. I guess I can bottom every once in awhile, but you're going to have to let me get used to it, okay?"

Iruka let Kakashi caress his wet back and enjoyed the comforting embrace.

"You don't have to if you don't want to. It was just a nice change for once, but I like being on bottom…and that doesn't make me a woman," Iruka insisted. Kakashi kissed his forehead.

"I know. It was stupid of me to say so. Any man that will go down on me in a public restroom doesn't deserve to be called anything but amazing. You really were gorgeous last night. I couldn't even find words when I first saw you."

"Okay, you can stop groveling and fuck me now," Iruka said playfully, pulling back slightly to smile up at his lover. Kakashi grinned and surprised Iruka by lifting him up and pressing his back against the cold tile. Iruka hissed and arched away from the coldness, but Kakashi pressed against him. The hot water streamed over them and Kakashi was ready, but Iruka wasn't aroused yet. Kakashi lowered him again and took a step back, much to Iruka's confusion.

"Touch yourself. I want to watch," Kakashi ordered. He reached for his own shampoo and squirted some into his hair, lathering it up and washing it without tearing his eyes away from Iruka. The brunette had spread his legs and gripped the showerhead with one hand. He was slowly pumping himself with his other hand. Still riveted by the sight, Kakashi squatted down and found the toy boats, tossing them out of the bathtub. He then sat, reclining in the tub and pushing the shower curtain away so he could hook one leg over the side of the tub. Iruka didn't need Kakashi to explain how it was going to work. Quickly, Iruka let go of the showerhead and dropped to his knees. He crawled the length of the tub and straddled his lover in one smooth movement. With only an encouraging nod from Kakashi, he slid onto the man's arousal and tossed his head back to feel the spray of water on his face. The water was getting a bit cool, and it made his nipples harden as it rolled down his chest in little rivulets. It felt divine on his hot skin. With one hand on the soap shelf and the other on Kakashi's knee, Iruka began to slowly ride Kakashi so that each thrust hit his prostate unmercifully. He moaned deep in his throat and slowed the pace even more, causing Kakashi to grunt in need and weakly buck his hips.

Iruka felt his chest constrict and he could no longer maintain the maddeningly slow pace. Moaning Kakashi's name, he began to speed up. Just when he was about to cum, Kakashi grabbed his hips and roughly stopped him. Opening his eyes in confusion, he looked down to see Kakashi pulling out to change their position. He groaned in disappointment but allowed Kakashi to turn off the icy water and pull him out of the tub. Iruka was so hard it was difficult to walk.

"Kakashi…" he pleaded, trying to draw the man's hand to his erection. Instead, Kakashi squeezed him so that he couldn't cum. "Ughhh!" Iruka protested. Ignoring his pleas and moans, Kakashi spun him around and bent him over the side of the tub. The porcelain was cold against his erection, and he began to loose it. Then Kakashi roughly slammed into his ass, expertly hitting that sweet spot deep inside him, and it came back full force. Two thrusts later and Iruka came powerfully, almost simultaneously with Kakashi.

Mere seconds later, there was a knock on the front door.

"Shit!" Iruka cursed, too boneless to even move.

"What?" Kakashi panted from somewhere slightly behind Iruka's right ear.

"That's Tsubaki. I asked her to come over this morning so we could talk." Kakashi pulled out of him and kissed his shoulder.

"Alright, I'll give you two some privacy."

"Wait! Kakashi…I don't even think I can stand," Iruka said helplessly. Between the hot water and what Iruka figured was probably the most intense climax of his life, he felt like he was a big puddle of mush. Laughing, Kakashi hooked his strong arms around Iruka's torso and hauled him up off the tub.

"You got it now?" Kakashi asked, his tone arrogant and beyond cocky. Iruka didn't want to stroke his ego anymore than his boneless-ness already had, but some praise was definitely in order.

"I think so. That was…impressive, Kakashi."

"Still think I shouldn't be a top?" Kakashi asked with a playful grin. Iruka rolled his eyes.

"Alright, you're exceedingly good at fucking me senseless. Now let me go! She's going to leave if I don't hurry!"

"First tell me who's sexy," Kakashi said. Iruka laughed.

"You are. Can I go now?" Iruka asked cheekily. Kakashi smirked and tossed him a towel. Iruka tied it around his waist and rushed to the door on wobbly legs, just barely in time to catch Tsubaki before she turned to leave.

* * *

**A/N:** Did you like it? Again, I could have edited the sex out, but I had to build a deck today so I have a million other things to do and I don't really have the time to edit it. I figured you guys would rather read the new chapter and just skip the naughty bits than not get a chapter at all. ;)


	12. Awkward Conversations

**Chapter 12**  
_"Awkward Conversations"_

Tsubaki almost didn't want to hear the door open. She clenched her fist against her chest and wished she could make her heart stop beating so fast. Mizuki was on a mission, so she had nothing to worry about. He wouldn't find out she'd even come.

She was perfectly safe.

She clenched her pretty eyes shut and said a quick little prayer that he wouldn't find out. It was stupid of her to do something that she knew would provoke his anger.

_'This is wrong, Tsubaki!'_ A little voice pleaded inside her head. _'Mizuki wants you now, and he's doing better again. This is just going to ruin things!'_

Swayed by her own thinking, she turned away from the door. Iruka-san wasn't home anyway. It was his fault they wouldn't be speaking – not because she'd chickened out.

She forced herself to knock once more. The waiting was killing her. In addition to the nerves, her stomach had been unsettled all morning. The stress couldn't be good for the baby. He _still_ wasn't answering! Not only did he sleep with a soon-to-be-married man, but he also neglected to keep his appointments. Tsubaki's full lips formed a frown. She turned to leave, feeling quite irritated with Iruka, herself, and the world in general.

"Tsubaki-san!" Iruka's voice called out, breaking into her thoughts. She turned, jumping a bit in surprise at the way he'd shouted her name. Did he want the whole neighborhood to hear that she was there? She forced a polite smile on her face and bowed quickly, mentally begging him to invite her inside before someone spotted her.

She was so flustered and out-of-sorts that she didn't realize Iruka wasn't wearing a shirt until he invited her inside. She blushed and averted her eyes. He was attractive and slender. No wonder gay men liked him. She blushed even deeper thinking about such things and tried to focus.

"Sorry, I was in the shower. Just give me a second to change. Please, take a seat," Iruka said. He waved in the general direction of the couch. She sat primly, observing the apartment with critical eyes. It was much nicer than Mizuki's home. Kakashi-san must be fairly high ranked. Surely Iruka-san didn't make enough money working as a janitor for such a nice place. Mizuki had hinted that he was promiscuous, so perhaps he was a whore? It felt strange thinking that such a person might live in Konoha. The fact that he slept with men was unsettling enough.

Nervously, she smoothed invisible wrinkles out of her hunter-green skirt. She'd put a great deal of effort into her appearance today. She wanted to look beautiful in front of Iruka. A very large part of her still felt jealousy towards him, and she wanted to show him that she was competition – attractive in a way that he couldn't be. It was stupid, even she knew, but it reassured her on some level.

Iruka-san returned dressed in tank top and some sweat pants that didn't quite fit him. Was he wearing Kakashi-san's pants? The idea of the two men together was bizarre to her, and despite the situation, she was immensely curious about how things worked between them. Did they act like a normal couple, or did they act as if they were just friends?

"Would you like something to drink, Tsubaki-san?" Iruka asked politely. He looked happy that she had come. Tsubaki wished she could be anywhere else.

"No, thank you. I'm fine."

"Oh, okay then. Something to eat?"

"I'm fine," she replied, perhaps a bit more sharply than she should have. She couldn't help it. They were not friends and she hadn't come for tea. What the man said to her could possibly change her life. Didn't he realize that? She snuck a glance at him to catch an uncomfortable look in his eyes. Slowly, he walked towards the couch, rubbing anxiously at the back of his neck.

"I guess there's no use pretending this is just a social get together," he remarked quietly. He sat on the opposite end of the couch hunched over, elbows resting on his knees. He propped his chin up on his hands.

"If you're just going to tell me that Mizuki-san is a bad person, you're wasting your time. Quite frankly, I don't care what he's done in the past. I'm sorry…terribly sorry…for the woman you told me about, but my relationship with Mizuki is different. Why else would he propose to me?" she said in a rush, unable to speak directly to Iruka. The brunette man glanced at her slowly, as if evaluating her – more specifically, he was looking at her hand.

He closed his eyes tightly.

"Mizuki gave you that ring?" he asked quietly. She looked down on it, her face softening instantly. Lovingly, she twisted the simple, golden band on her finger.

"Yes," she answered, matching his tone. Iruka stood and took a frame down off the wall.

"This is a picture of my parents. They died along with Mizuki's family during the demon attack." He passed her the picture frame. A bit confused, Tsubaki stared at the pretty woman with shoulder length brown hair and tanned skin.

"She's very pretty. You have her coloring," Tsubaki said absently.

"Thank you. I always thought she was gorgeous. It's ironic that you mention her coloring. My father said it was the reason he bought her a gold ring instead of a silver one. The gold looked prettier against her skin, you see." The remark immediately drew her eyes to the band Iruka mentioned. The picture was close enough that it could be seen clearly.

"It looks like mine!" Tsubaki said in surprise. Iruka had become very tense beside her. He snatched the picture away and clenched it tightly.

"That's because it _is_ hers. I gave it to Mizuki – back when he promised me that we would always be together. It has the word 'faith' engraved on the inside, doesn't it?" Iruka asked, his voice thick with emotion. Tsubaki bit her lip and felt tears well up in her eyes. Heartlessly, Iruka continued speaking. "I could be nice and say maybe you reminded him of me, but more likely he probably just re-discovered it among his things and decided to recycle it rather than buy a new one." Tsubaki sat very still, unsure how to respond to the raw anger in Iruka's tone. Forcibly, the other man returned the picture to the wall and then stood staring at it, his fists clenched.

"I…I don't know what to say," Tsubaki said helplessly, the tears finally slipping down her cheeks. She pulled the ring off her finger. "If it was your mother's…you should have it."

"I don't want it. It's tainted now." His words were hard as steel. After a tense silence, he relaxed his hands and turned to face her again. She was surprised to see how upset he looked. He returned to the couch, only this time he sat much closer to her. He grabbed her hands, and the wedding ring fell onto the couch between them. Iruka stared at her intensely. "Don't you see, Tsubaki? He may have come to a new place and done well for himself, but he didn't leave his old ways behind."

Iruka let go of her hands and picked up the ring. Tsubaki realized it looked much better against his skin than it did against her own. Her heart felt like it was breaking.

"I'm not going to tell you Mizuki is a bad person, because I'm not one to judge. I've done some pretty terrible things in my life, too. The difference is that Mizuki never learns. Mizuki will always hurt others, and he will always be a liar and a manipulator. That's who he is, and you can't change that. You're arrogant if you think you can. People have to want to change – you can't do it for them. And Mizuki doesn't want to change. If you want to stay with him, you have to accept that this pain you feel right now won't ever go away." Iruka clenched the ring in his palm and looked at her with such sorrow in his eyes that she couldn't look away.

"I have to take the good with the bad," she finally said. "I don't want to give up on him." Iruka nodded, and handed her the ring. Hesitantly, she took it.

"I know…I remember…how sometimes it almost felt good to hurt so much. Like…the love felt more real because I was suffering for it. But now someone else will suffer, too. Your baby won't understand why Mizuki acts the way he does. When you chose this for your life, you're choosing it for your baby, too."

"I…I know that," she said in a voice that did not sound like her own. Iruka sighed resignedly beside her.

"Then I guess there's nothing else to say."

Tsubaki stood slowly and began to walk towards the door. As she passed the end table, she gently set the ring down. Iruka looked up in question.

"Do whatever you want with it. I won't be needing it anymore."

Iruka smiled in relief, but she did not feel like she could return it. At the moment, she wondered if she'd ever smile again.

"What…what are you going to do next?" Iruka asked. Tsubaki shrugged delicately.

"I feel like I know why she did it now. I didn't understand before – about how someone could end their own life."

"Please, Tsubaki, don't talk like that," Iruka said. He came to stand behind her, and then he embraced her from behind. She began to sob.

"I love him," she said uselessly. "I love him more than life itself." She turned in Iruka's arms and let him hold her as she broke down. Iruka guided her to the couch and sat down with her. She probably would have cried for hours, but the front door burst open and a blonde tornado came whirling into the living room. Tsubaki looked up startled, her eyes widening in surprise. Iruka made no apologies for the interruption.

"This is my son, Tsubaki. Naruto, this is my friend, Tsubaki-san."

"Hi! Why are you crying? Did someone hurt you?" Naruto asked innocently, coming closer and peering at her with big blue eyes. He leaned over to study her tear-streaked face. Then he stood confidently, pointing a finger at her dramatically. "'Cause my dad will protect you! He's really brave. Once, these really scary thieves stopped us, and they said they were going to take all our money! But my dad told them off, even though they were bigger than he was. I was really scared, but I tried to act tough like he did!" Naruto told the story with big hand gestures and a solemn expression.

Tsubaki didn't know what to say, so she wiped at her eyes.

"What happened after he told them off?" she asked blankly.

"They decided they were gonna kill us," Naruto deadpanned. Tsubaki blinked. "It was a good thing that Kakashi showed up to save us. So actually, if it was thieves that made you cry, you might be better off asking Kakashi for help."

"Gee, thanks Naruto," Iruka said dryly, standing up and ruffling his son's hair playfully. Tsubaki smiled a bit without even realizing it. Naruto flashed her a toothy grin.

"That's better. No more tears! You're really pretty when you smile – almost as pretty as Sakura-chan! That's the girl I'm gonna marry one day, but only if I get around to it. I might be too busy doing boy stuff." Naruto scratched idly at his chin, as if considering what the future might hold for him. Without really thinking, Tsubaki reached for the ring on the end table. She surprised the young boy by taking his hand and placing the ring in his palm.

"Well, if you ever get around to marrying Sakura-chan someday, and you really, really love her, give her this. Listen, Naruto, because this is very important. This ring is magic if you give it to someone you really love. From then on, every time she looks at it, she'll remember how pretty your blue eyes looked when you gave it to her."

"That's all?" Naruto asked with a pout. Tsubaki nodded.

"Sometimes that's all it takes," she replied with a sad smile. Although it was obvious Naruto didn't understand the double meaning in her words, he took the ring and held it tightly, as if it were a special treasure.

"Okay…thanks lady!"

"No, Naruto-chan, thank you…for making me smile. I was worried for a second that I'd forgotten how! Did you know that I'm going to have a baby soon? Hopefully he'll be just as handsome as you are," Tsubaki said, gently touching Naruto's cheek as she stood. Naruto looked like he was debating with himself, but then he pulled an abused slip of paper out of his pocket. It was dirty, and a corner was missing. He held it out to her like it was sacred. Tsubaki took it and tilted her head as she read it.

"A meal ticket at the Ramen stand?" she asked. Naruto nodded, a sweet smile on his whiskered face.

"It's my last one, but you take it for your baby. If he eats ramen, he'll get really strong and handsome. I eat ramen every day, so that's how I know!"

Tsubaki laughed, really laughed, and Iruka caught her eyes over Naruto's head. As her smile faded, she placed a hand against her stomach. So this was also something Iruka had wanted her to see – the amazing power that children have to heal the jaded hearts of the adults around them.

She held the ramen ticket in front of her belly.

"See that, Baby? Naruto-kun gave you some ramen. Would you like some now?"

"Woah! You keep your baby in there?" Naruto asked, so amazed that he forgot his manners and poked at her stomach gently.

"Naruto!" Iruka scolded. The little blonde boy looked up at him in protest.

"But, dad, she ate her baby!" Naruto almost wailed. Tsubaki chuckled and held up her hands in protest.

"It's not like that, Naruto-kun! My baby is just really small now, and he'll stay inside of me until he's big enough to come out. The world can be dangerous, you know, especially if you're very tiny. My baby's only this big right now," Tsubaki said as she held her fingers a few inches apart. Naruto's eyes were as big as saucers. Then his expression returned to normal as if he had figured something out in his head.

"I guess I understand now. Nobody protected me in a belly. I got left in a dark place. I bet it's warmer in your belly, though," Naruto said matter-of-factually. He reached for his dad's hand and held it tightly. He smiled up at her. "But it's okay. If I'd been in a belly, then my dad wouldn't have found me! I was still pretty little. Dad, was I bigger than this much?" Naruto asked, holding his fingers like Tsubaki had done. The two adults grinned at each other.

"You were a little bigger than that, Naruto-kun," Iruka said, a slight blush still on his cheeks. Tsubaki pitied the man for the discussion he'd have to give Naruto fairly soon about where babies came from. She looked again fondly at the ticket in her hand.

"This is for three bowls. Why don't the two of you come with me and have an early lunch?" Tsubaki invited. She knew that when the cheerful little boy was gone, she wouldn't feel nearly so confident about her decision. Perhaps sensing she wasn't quite ready to be alone yet, Iruka nodded.

"That sounds good. Do you want to, Naruto?" Iruka asked. Much to Iruka's surprise, Naruto didn't immediately reply.

"Can Sasuke-kun come, too, Dad? He's sad 'cause his nanny took him to see stones today. Ramen might make him feel better!"

"Stones?" Iruka asked uncomprehendingly. Tsubaki, however, caught on.

"I think he means the graveyard. Konoha uses large stones as markers." Iruka's face became troubled.

"Is Sasuke still where the stones are?" he asked Naruto. The blonde boy nodded.

"We were playing outside this morning, and his nanny came – the one that makes us food – and she said he had forgotten what day it was. We went back to his place and he had to put on nice clothes, and then we went to the stones. She told me to go home. I hid behind a tree and after a long time, she left. I asked Sasuke to come play, but he was crying. He told me to go away." Iruka nodded in understanding. He looked up at Tsubaki, who had a sympathetic expression on her pretty face.

"Do you think you could take Naruto on to the ramen stand? I'll meet you there in just a few minutes. I need to go check on Sasuke-kun."

"That's fine," Tsubaki said. She reached out for Naruto's hand, and he happily took hers.

"Hold on just one moment. Let me get some money from my room. Naruto has a big appetite," Iruka explained. He went into the bedroom and stopped when he saw Kakashi reclined on the bed reading. He was fully dressed. "I thought you were going out," Iruka said. Kakashi glanced up at him.

"I decided to stay so I'd be here if you needed me. Everything alright?" Kakashi swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood. He left his book on the bedside table and closed the distance between himself and Iruka. When he reached him, he slipped a finger into the waistband of Iruka's sweatpants and pulled him against his chest. Iruka gave him a smile and kissed his chin.

"It went fine with Tsubaki, but Sasuke-kun is at the graveyard by himself. I want to go check on him. It must be the anniversary of his parents' deaths. Tsubaki is going to take Naruto to the ramen stand. Will you tag along with them?"

"Sure," Kakashi replied. He tugged his mask down and kissed Iruka's soft lips. When they parted he said, "I'm proud of you for talking to Tsubaki. I know it was hard on you."

"Yeah, it was. But it's over now. I feel a lot better about everything."

"Will you talk about it with me later tonight?" Kakashi asked gently, stroking Iruka's cheek with his thumb. Iruka averted his eyes.

"I will eventually. Just…give me a little time, okay?"

"I can do that. Go check on Sasuke-kun. The graveyard isn't too far from your old place. Just follow the road that runs alongside the apartment complex until the buildings thin out. You'll pass a small forest and a training ground on your left, and then you'll get to the graveyard."

"Okay, thanks. I'll meet up with you later." Kakashi nodded and the two of them left the bedroom, their hands lightly clasped.

"Oh, hello Kakashi-san," Tsubaki said, bowing slightly in greeting. Kakashi nodded in reply.

"Hello, Tsubaki-san. I'd like to come with you and Naruto, if that's alright."

"Of course. The more the merrier," Tsubaki said. The group left the apartment and headed in different directions.

Iruka walked quickly, growing more and more irritated with the woman who'd left Sasuke all alone in a graveyard. He started to jog, ignoring the odd looks he got. After a few minutes of travel, he slowed to a walk as he left the small forest behind and saw the graveyard for the first time. His parents were buried there somewhere, but as a boy he had not wanted to see their graves. He'd always avoided the place, but he had to admit that it was not as horrible and frightening as he'd imagined as a child. There was a water fountain that attracted pretty little birds, and flowers had grown around many of the stones. It was easy enough to find Sasuke. He sat clutching his knees to his chest, sitting in front of two, nearly identical stones. He wore an outfit that had been starched too much. The black collar stood up stiffly against his pale neck. As Iruka drew nearer, he could see tear stains on his face.

"Sasuke-kun?" Iruka asked gently. Sasuke didn't look at him. It was a bright, sunny day, and the darkly clad, little boy looked sadly out of place amongst the pretty flowers and the wispy clouds.

"Go away," he mumbled into his knees. Iruka sighed.

"My parents are buried here, too. I've never come to visit them, though. I bet your parents are happy to see you."

The little boy didn't reply. Iruka sat beside him, ignoring the hot glare he received. They were both quiet for a long time and then Sasuke spoke. His voice was angry, and more tears spilled down his cheeks.

"My parents aren't here. They're dead, and they aren't ever coming back. I HATE my brother! I'm going to kill him for what he did!" Sasuke rubbed furiously at the fresh tears in his eyes.

Iruka knew the moment had come, and he wrapped his arms around Sasuke and hauled him into his lap. Sasuke didn't fight him. He was just a tired, frightened little boy.

"Sasuke-kun, your brother was sick. I know what he did hurt you, but there are some people who don't feel in the same way you and I do. They don't understand what it is to love someone, or to care about a friend. They don't understand that love is where strength comes from. It won't do you any good to stay mad at your brother, Sasuke-kun. His heart was sick, and he couldn't understand that what he did was wrong. Your parents would want to see you grow up to be healthy and happy. That's what you can do to make them proud. That's something that would make me very proud of you, too."

Sasuke stayed very quiet in his arms, his face hidden in his shirt.

"My brother told me to kill him. He didn't act like he was sick," Sasuke said, sniffling a bit. Iruka leaned down to catch Sasuke's eye.

"There are different ways a person can be sick, Sasuke-kun. Coughing and having a fever is one kind of sick, but you can also be sick here," Iruka lightly touched Sasuke's chest, "in your heart. When your heart is sick, you hurt other people and don't feel sad or guilty. You don't feel anything at all. It's a very sad thing when a person is sick like that."

"My brother used to love me," Sasuke said pitifully, almost choking on the words. Iruka hugged him tightly, rocking the boy gently as he grieved.

"He did before he got sick. That's how you should remember your brother, Sasuke-kun. Remember the good times and know that even though someone is dead, a part of them is still with us in our hearts. Your parents are with you, but if you let your heart fill up with too much hatred, you'll push them out."

"I can't hear them," Sasuke replied, clutching at his own heart almost desperately.

"Close your eyes, Sasuke-kun," Iruka said gently. "I want you to picture your mother. What does she look like?"

"She…she's tall and pretty. She has a white apron that smells good," Sasuke whispered.

"Does she like to cook?"

"Uh-huh," Sasuke replied, nodding his head. Iruka smiled.

"Did you ever watch her while she cooked good food?" he asked. Sasuke nodded again. "What did you talk about?"

"We…we talked about my school a lot. She told me she loved me."

"Can you remember how her voice sounded?" Sasuke nodded again, but this time it was not so sure.

"I think so," he said.

"You see? She's right there. All you have to do is close your eyes and think about her. Do you have a picture of your parents?" Again, Sasuke nodded, suddenly very quiet, his eyes still shut tightly.

"Then you never have to worry about forgetting what she looks like. You'll always have that picture, and your memory of her will always be in your heart. Do you feel a little better now?"

"A little bit," Sasuke said, slowly opening up his eyes to peer up at him. Iruka gave him a reassuring smile.

"You still have people that love you, Sasuke. I love you, and so does Naruto." Sasuke looked so vulnerable and small in his arms. Iruka wished he could take away the boy's pain. Feeling his own voice becoming a bit rough with emotion, he continued speaking. "Naruto was worried about you. He wants you to come eat ramen with us. Will you come?"

Weakly, Sasuke nodded his head. Hand in hand, the two of them left the graveyard.

As they walked down the dirt road through the forest, Sasuke looked up at him.

"Naruto was sick. Is his heart going to get sick, too?" Iruka thought of the demon and couldn't immediately answer. It felt as if his throat had closed up. He managed to shake his head weakly. He swallowed thickly and forced himself not to worry about the fox demon.

"When…when was Naruto sick, Sasuke?"

"When he was at my house. He threw up and pulled his hair out. Kakashi-san came and took him to the hospital," Sasuke informed. Iruka expertly hid his glare. Kakashi had some explaining to do later. The only thing that checked his anger was the fact that he knew Naruto was perfectly fine at the moment.

"Thank you for telling me, Sasuke. You don't have to worry about Naruto-kun getting a sick heart. He cares too much about you and me." Even as Iruka said the words, a part of him wondered if the day would come when the demon overpowered the boy. He closed his eyes and an image of his own mother sprang to mind.

_'Have faith, sweetheart. Always have faith.'_

The memory of her words restored a bit of his strength. Everything would work out fine. He had faith in the strength of Naruto's heart to overcome.

* * *

**A/N:** Sorry I got this up late, guys. I'll post another chapter tonight to make up for it. 


	13. Hopeless

**Chapter 13**

_"Hopeless"_

Iruka gave no sign that he was irritated with Kakashi during lunch. Afterwards, he offered to walk Tsubaki home, but she waved him off.

"I'll be fine. I have some thinking to do," she said. Iruka nodded and then gave her a hug that was a bit awkward.

"If you need anything, anything at all, I'll help you, okay?" Iruka said sincerely. Tsubaki nodded and waved goodbye to everyone. Naruto tugged on the hem of Iruka's tank top.

"Dad, can Sasuke and I go to the training ground by the school?" Because he wanted to speak with Kakashi alone, Iruka agreed.

"That's fine, but both of you need to be at the house before it gets dark to do homework. Keep in mind that Sasuke-kun will need to go home to get his things, too. You are going to stay the night, right Sasuke?" Iruka asked. The dark-haired boy nodded briefly. He had been subdued all afternoon. Even Naruto was having a difficult time trying to cheer him. "Okay then, but I better not have to come find you tonight," Iruka warned as the boys scampered off. Kakashi was immediately by his side, reaching for his hand. Iruka pulled it away and began to walk quickly, irritation pouring off of him. He heard Kakashi sigh behind him.

"What? What did I do wrong now?" he asked, falling into step with him.

"Not now," Iruka said sharply.

"Why not now?" Kakashi pressed, focused on him intently. Iruka flashed a fake smile and nodded in greeting.

"Because you're friends are coming towards us. Good afternoon," Iruka said, when the pretty woman and her companion where in hearing range.

"Good afternoon. I'm afraid I don't know your name, though everyone's talking about you," she said. Her tone was neutral. Iruka didn't quite know how to reply to such a statement, so he settled on just introducing himself.

"My name is Umino Iruka."

"I'm Kurenai, and this is Asuma. Occasionally we work with Kakashi."

"It's nice to meet you both," Iruka replied. Kurenai didn't say anything else. Iruka found himself distracted by her strange eyes. Her companion was tall and average looking, with a glowing cigarette butt almost flush against his chapped lips. Iruka vaguely recognized him from somewhere, but there wasn't anything about his face or dress that was particularly memorable. Kurenai, on the other hand, was unmistakable. He knew her from the restaurant, but a nagging voice in his head told him he'd seen her before, too.

"Hello, Kakashi," Kurenai said pointedly. The silver haired man didn't even twitch.

"Yo," he replied lazily with a bored expression. It was strange for Iruka to see. Kakashi always seemed so animated and talkative when he was alone with him. Then again, when they were alone they were usually either fighting or fucking. Iruka thought about what Sasuke had told him earlier. He knew which one they'd be doing tonight.

Iruka sighed. He'd already had too many awkward conversations that morning. He didn't feel up to facing Kakashi's curious, probably judgmental friends.

"I'm sorry, but I really need to be going. I left something in the oven at home," Iruka lied. Kurenai's eyes narrowed at him, and it occurred to him too late that she was a ninja and could probably spot a lie a mile away.

Oh well. Iruka said a hasty goodbye and left Kakashi alone with them.

Kurenai wasn't going to miss her opportunity.

"He lied just now," Kurenai observed. Kakashi didn't reply. He almost reached for his book, but he figured the confrontation would have to come at one point and it might as well be now. Kurenai and Asuma were the only two other Jounins that he would tolerate questions from. He wasn't close to any of his subordinates in A.N.B.U., but neither Kurenai nor Asuma had ever worked under him. Before he went A.N.B.U., the three of them had often worked on equal terms as a team. Something like a strange friendship had evolved from that relationship, so Kakashi would let Kurenai be a little nosy.

"We saw him before at the bar, near that barbecue place that's so good," Asuma remarked casually. Kurenai's eyes narrowed again, but her tone remained neutral.

"He was with another man – a ninja that works at the Academy, I believe."

Still, Kakashi didn't speak. So far, they hadn't asked him any questions. They were merely verifying information in the disguise of making idle chitchat with an old teammate.

"Are you friends with him or…something else?" Kurenai finally asked. Her voice lost its blandness and her curiosity was apparent.

"He and his son moved in with me recently," Kakashi replied. Asuma finally pulled the spent cigarette away from his lips and flicked it to the ground. He toed it out with his sandal. Kurenai relaxed slightly.

"So you're just roommates. I'm glad then, because Konoha is a small town and there are dangerous rumors going around. I would advise your friend not to demonstrate his sexual preference in a public place again if he doesn't want any trouble. Asuma and I don't care, but most people do. Some, ninjas and civilians alike, have been talking about telling him to leave. The teacher he was with is probably going to be dismissed. Parents don't want him teaching the children. The general opinion is that people like your friend and that teacher shouldn't be in a village like Konoha."

Kakashi smirked under his mask. Kurenai had assumed too much and gone too far. Asuma realized it, and his eyes widened for a brief second.

"I'm one of Konoha's deadliest weapons. I could be very dangerous in someone else's hands," Kakashi said in the voice he used during battle. Kurenai's mouth dropped open a bit in surprise.

"I didn't think -"

"No, you didn't. Start this rumor, Kurenai. Anyone who threatens Iruka or Naruto will have to deal with me. If he's forced to leave, I'll be going with him. It would be troublesome to update everyone's Bingo books with my information," Kakashi smirked so that it could be seen through his mask. "Just think how much paper it would take to list all of my attacks." With that, he pulled out his book and walked away, reading casually as if nothing had happened.

"This could get ugly," Kurenai remarked, after Kakashi was out of hearing range. Beside her, Asuma watched Kakashi disappear around a corner.

"Yep," he replied, pulling a fresh cigarette to his lips.

"I should report this to the Hokage," Kurenai said with a sigh. Asuma glanced down at her.

"Now that it's not just a rumor, I think that would be wise."

"Umino may be all of the things people are saying he is, but he didn't waste time getting his hooks into someone strong enough to protect him."

"If he's good enough to dupe Kakashi, the guy should have been a ninja," Asuma drawled as the couple began walking towards the Hokage tower. They walked in silence for a few moments before Kurenai spoke very quietly.

"On a personal level, I pity Kakashi. I didn't know he was different. He reads those awful books all the time so I just assumed…but if he is going to be with a man, I wish he'd picked one that wasn't so…_trashy_. That's really the only word for it. Slumming in bars when he has a child to take care of, sleeping around, and doing _that_ in a public bathroom – Kakashi deserves someone who isn't just after his money."

"You just had hopes of seeing Kakashi settle down with that girl at the ramen bar," Asuma said with a teasing smirk. He blew out a puff of smoke and Kurenai shot him an irritated look.

"He's been flirting with her for years!" Kurenai defended.

"Maybe he was just trying to use her to get to her uncle," Asuma joked, chuckling a bit at his own crudeness. Kurenai rolled her eyes.

"Humph! Obviously not, as he goes for the manipulative, money-hungry types," Kurenai huffed. Asuma looked at her carefully.

"You're really upset about this, aren't you?" he asked.

"Of course I am! We're the only friends Kakashi has, other than Gai, and I don't like seeing him get into this kind of trouble. Like I said, I don't care if he's gay or not, but I _do_ care that he's fallen for someone like Umino. He's just going to get hurt."

"Hey, hey, calm down, honey. There may be more to this then we see. Kakashi may be a little eccentric, and he's obviously fallen hard for this guy, but he's not going to do anything stupid. Kakashi isn't the type to loose his head."

Kurenai opened the door to the Hokage tower and sauntered through, shooting a meaningful glance at him over her shoulder.

"Depends on which head he's thinking with."

Asuma really couldn't argue with that.

* * *

Iruka had worked himself up into a fiery temper by the time Kakashi walked through the front door. The ninja had a dark look on his face and an almost murderous aura, but Iruka didn't really care. He wasn't afraid of Kakashi.

"So were you just not going to tell me?" Iruka asked just before bringing a butcher knife down heavily onto a helpless vegetable. He was cooking dinner early, because when he was angry, he had to be doing something.

Kakashi gave him a long, hard look and then simply walked into the bedroom.

"Guess that answers my damn question," Iruka hissed angrily, chopping a few more times before chunking the knife into the sink and stomping towards the bedroom. Inside, Kakashi was staring out the window, spinning a knife at a blurring speed on his fingertip. Someone that didn't know him well wouldn't see the tension in his shoulders and the deadly flash in his revealed eye. Iruka merely huffed in annoyance, his hands automatically going to his hips.

"Put that away before you cut yourself and I have to haul your bleeding ass to the emergency room for stitches," Iruka scolded. He crossed his arms and pursed his lips. "Oh, and speaking of the emergency room, you didn't happen to take Naruto there recently and just forget to tell me about it, hmm?" Iruka could feel his face getting red and a twitch developing in his eye for every second that Kakashi didn't immediately start apologizing. "WELL?" Iruka shouted, stomping over to the infuriating man and getting in his face. The knife stopped spinning instantly, but Kakashi still looked just as dangerous.

"You lied to Kurenai. Why?" Kakashi said in a cold voice. Confused at the topic change, Iruka shrugged in dismissal and then poked Kakashi in the chest.

"I don't know, but don't try to change the subject!" Kakashi scowled and clenched his knife.

"Are you always going to be yelling at me for something? You haven't known me for that long, so I figured there wasn't that much you could get mad about, but so far I've been impressed with your creativity," Kakashi growled. Iruka rolled his eyes and the hands were back on his hips.

"What can I say? You keep finding new and exciting ways to act like an ass! This is the health of my son we're talking about here. That is NOT something you hide from me, ever. Am I fucking clear?" Iruka questioned harshly. Kakashi advanced a step closer putting them inches from each other's faces.

"Well, you've certainly been fucking something. Guess I should have realized that if you'd suck my dick in a bathroom you wouldn't hesitate to fuck Mizuki in a bar!"

Iruka stepped back as if Kakashi had physically pushed him.

"What the hell are you talking about? That was _years _ago. I was sixteen, we were dating, and I didn't even know you!" Kakashi slammed his hand against the wall, but it wasn't so hard that it dented the wall.

"I'm talking more recent, but that's really fucking disgusting, just so you know. It was a Konoha bar. Ring any bells? Apparently, the whole village is talking about it. People are offended and they're sacking Mizuki because of it –talking about running you out of town," Kakashi explained in a cold, hard as steel tone.

"What?" Iruka asked helplessly, sitting weakly on the bed behind him. He ripped his hair tie out and jerked his fingers through his hair anxiously. "That doesn't make any sense! We were tipsy and we danced, maybe kissed a few times, but that was it. It's not like there were children watching or we did something indecent!"

"Iruka, when was this?" Kakashi asked, still obviously furious. Iruka stood and began to pace.

"It was…I don't know…it seems like it was forever ago, but I guess it was only two or three weeks past." Iruka tugged on a lock of his long hair, obviously emotionally upset about the circumstances, but then his expression transformed back into one of anger. "Look, I don't care that some stupid people get their panties in a twist because I fuck other men. What's wrong with Naruto? What are you trying to hide from me?"

"Nothing! The night Tsubaki and I came over to Mizuki's, and I went to check on the boys, Naruto was showing signs of the demon taking over. His body was rejecting food and he was hurting himself. I realized it was because the seal weakened when he became emotional, so I re-enforced it. It knocked him out and since _someone_ had neglected him for a week and made him upset, he hadn't been eating well and the demon was hurting him. I took him to the hospital and told them he'd had the stomach flu so the doctors wouldn't be suspicious. Once the seal was strengthened, he just needed some food and a good night of sleep. As you saw, he was fine the next morning," Kakashi explained in an angry rush, not sparing Iruka's feelings in the slightest.

Iruka quit his pacing after Kakashi's explanation and moved to stand by the window, staring out vacantly while Kakashi sat wearily on the bed.

"Kurenai was trying to warn me that someone is going to threaten you, or maybe even Naruto. Nobody wants gays in Konoha. It's a conservative place, and people rarely break the unspoken rules here. The wealthiest most noble ninja clans in the world live here – they don't want the trash of society setting a bad example for their brats. They don't know any better," Kakashi explained tiredly, rubbing at his face. Iruka's eyes slid from the window to rest on Kakashi.

"You thought I was trash, too. You aren't so different from them, Kakashi," Iruka said. Kakashi stared at him, almost in disbelief.

"What more do you want from me? I'm letting you live here even though we don't really even know each other, I'm supporting a loud-mouthed kid that isn't even mine, I'm dealing with your psychotic ex-boyfriend, and now I'm going to risk everything I've worked for in this village to defend your right to stay here! And nothing I do is right in your eyes. If I'd wanted a wife to bitch at me, I could have married some bimbo years ago and saved myself a hell of a lot of trouble," Kakashi spat.

Iruka returned his gaze to the window, as if nothing Kakashi said hurt him.

"What you did to the seal—will Naruto be safe now, or will it weaken again?" he finally asked. His tone sounded like he was merely commenting on the weather. Kakashi stood again and walked into the bathroom. Iruka listened as he splashed water onto his face. When he returned, his mask was bunched around his neck and the material was damp.

"I couldn't say. It depends on how powerful he becomes," Kakashi replied, just as blandly. Iruka turned around, but stared down at his feet. His hair fell around his face, and Kakashi suddenly felt tired of fighting with him. He just wanted to hold him and forget about everything.

"So if Naruto gets stronger, the seal is more likely to weaken again?" Iruka asked. Kakashi shrugged and ran a hand through his spiky, silver hair.

"It just depends. But yes, that's a possibility," Kakashi said. Iruka nodded. Kakashi felt distinctly like he'd been shut out, and he didn't like the feeling at all. "Iruka…what are you thinking?" he asked. Iruka glanced up at him slowly, and then pushed off the wall and passed him.

"Nothing, really," he said. Kakashi cursed mentally and followed after him. Iruka didn't leave, as Kakashi had been expecting him to. Instead, he simply went to the kitchen and resumed cooking. Kakashi stood watching him, not knowing what else to do.

"You're not still angry at me?" Kakashi asked, shoving his hands in his pockets so that he wouldn't reach for Iruka's hands. Iruka began to rhythmically chop a carrot.

"You said you didn't want me to bitch at you, so I'm not bitching. Am I doing something else that's bothering you?" Iruka asked, still without a hint of anger. Kakashi sighed. He pulled his hands out of his pockets and walked into the kitchen area. Iruka paused his chopping.

"Yes! We should be making up and fucking – not this weird…whatever this is," Kakashi said ineloquently, gesturing at Iruka chopping vegetables. Iruka slowly resumed chopping, his eyes not even staring at his task.

"Are you saying you want to fuck me?" Iruka asked dully.

"It usually fixes whatever we're fighting about, so yes," Kakashi said, not even sure what was going on anymore. Iruka absently dropped the knife and pulled off his tank top. With the same lack of modesty or emotion, he stepped out of his pants (they were Kakashi's) and revealed that he wasn't wearing any underwear. He'd dressed in a hurry that morning, Kakashi remembered. Without looking to see if Kakashi was following or not, Iruka went into the bedroom and stretched out on the bed. Kakashi followed, shrugging out of his own clothes. Eventually he stood by the bed nearly nude, staring down at Iruka who simply stared up at him blankly, like he was far away, or sleeping with his eyes open. Kakashi sat down on the edge of the bed and Iruka continued to stare up at the ceiling. Kakashi grabbed his hand and rubbed it a bit between his own. Iruka blinked slowly, but didn't look at him. His other hand rested on his tan stomach. He didn't move.

"Iruka, snap out of it. I'm sorry, okay? Please, baby, look at me."

"Don't -" Iruka started automatically, but then he cut himself off. He finished with a monotonous, "I guess I don't care what you call me."

Kakashi began to get angry again. He let go of Iruka's hand and Iruka just let it flop onto the bed.

"Quit acting like this! Are you doing this just to get what you want? You can't work this out like an adult? No, you have to resort to playing this stupid game because you know it's pissing me off! Just tell me what you want and I'll do it! Don't you realize that I'd do anything for you? Don't you? TALK to me, Iruka!" Kakashi began to shout, leaning closer to Iruka's face. Iruka didn't even wince when Kakashi's spittle hit his face. Finally, Iruka frowned and rolled over, turning his back to him.

Afraid he would loose his temper and do something he regretted, Kakashi stood up, scooped up his clothing, and left the room. He slammed the bedroom door behind him, but it didn't get any reaction. He dressed hastily and left, no particular destination in mind, until he found himself at Mizuki's door.

When the other man answered, Kakashi expected himself to just haul off and beat him, but instead he just stared. Mizuki looked like shit. He obviously hadn't bathed, his teeth were yellow and his eyes were bloodshot. A beer dangled from his fingers and a cigarette poked out of his mouth. Slowly, the man lifted his hand and pulled the cigarette away. He blew a cloud of smoke at Kakashi, who merely glared.

"What the fuck do you want?" Kakashi didn't answer. Mizuki grinned. "Did you come here to beat the shit outta me for the honor of your little slut?"

"I want to talk with you about Iruka," Kakashi said. "I want to know what you know about him."

Mizuki looked at him like he was crazy for a second, and then he turned and walked back into his filthy apartment.

"Come on in. I mean, why the hell not? Let's talk about baby cheeks."

"You look like shit," Kakashi remarked absently, staring in disgust at the nastiness that had built up around Mizuki since Iruka had left.

"Yeah, well, I got fired this morning after getting back from a fucked up mission and my girl left me just an hour ago."

"You deserved it. A guy like you shouldn't be teaching children," Kakashi said. Mizuki shrugged. He opened his small refrigerator and pulled out another beer. He chugged the one in his hand and then tossed it against the wall. The shards of glass broke and clinked against the tile floor.

"A guy like me, yeah…heh…I guess your shit's pink and smells like flowers. Want a beer?" Mizuki asked. Kakashi shook his head. "Suit yourself. I'm getting' wasted, so you caught me at a great time. Otherwise, I would have shut the door on your high and mighty ass."

"Don't judge me, you shit head," Kakashi snapped. "And don't act like you're such a victim of life. I really can't stomach it." Mizuki gave him a long look.

"We're all victims of something."

"Don't act like your wise, either. I won't fall for your bullshit," Kakashi snapped. Mizuki didn't reply. Instead, he opened his new beer and took a deep swig. He leaned against his kitchen counter.

"I've never lied about who I am, and I don't try to hide my sin behind a mask," Mizuki settled on saying. "But still, everyone loves to hate me. Why? Because I actually do what everyone else is wishing _they_ could do, and I'm honest when it counts."

"I've never had the urge to beat up a woman," Kakashi replied with a one-eyed glare. Mizuki slowly shifted his eyes to him and smirked.

"But you've had other dirty urges. When you were a kid and everyone said it was nasty to jerk yourself off, I bet you were too afraid to do it, afraid your parents would find out. Or what about the first time someone you loved died, and all you wanted was to find who did it and break their mother fucking neck – but you didn't, because everyone tells you not to. You live your whole life denying what you really want to do – everyone does. People like Iruka and Tsubaki—and people like them are everywhere—love me the most. You wanna know why?"

Kakashi remained silent.

"It's because they're the kind that fight those urges the hardest. They're those sickeningly good people that earn everyone's respect and don't know who the fuck they are because they spend their whole lives trying to make other people happy. They love me because I'm the one person that they can't ever satisfy. Because what I want is to see them miserable, and for people like them, feeling miserable is a luxury. I mean, just think about it! If you spent your whole life getting fucked by life, but you always kept your chin up, always kept your stupid faith, there's a part of you that wants everyone to see how broken down my life you feel on the inside. I break people on the outside. I'm the bad guy, and they want it. They want me to fuck them up so bad that they can't pretend anymore. They can't deny that they fuck and cuss and shit. They live through me, live with me. And the ones that walk away from me, survive me, feel like just once in their life they really lived without having to pretend that everything was good." Mizuki looked at him challengingly, waiting for a response.

"You're drunk," Kakashi finally observed, though his mind was spinning.

"Yeah, yeah…I haven't been sober for years," Mizuki replied, waving him off with his beer. Mizuki took a deep drag on his cigarette. His eyes slithered up and down Kakashi's frame. "You wanna fuck?" he asked. Kakashi was too shocked to reply, so Mizuki kept talking. "And I don't mean the gentle, romantic shit you do with Iruka. I mean pain. I mean forgetting about everything and acting like fucking animals! Usually I don't go for your type, but I'm drunk so I'll make an exception for you. Fuck everything that's fucked you lately, and let's just…"

"Fuck?" Kakashi asked dryly. Mizuki lost the gleam in his eyes and he took a big swig of beer.

"Yeah. But I can see you're not interested."

What scared Kakashi was that a part of him _was_ interested. A part of him rebelled against the serious commitment he found himself trapped in with Iruka, and the idea of carnal fucking with a stranger sounded _good_. It was one of those bad things he knew he shouldn't do – something he knew he'd regret – the kind of thing Mizuki had just been talking about.

"I love Iruka. I don't want to hurt him," Kakashi said, without even realizing he was speaking.

"You almost fell for it," Mizuki smirked. Kakashi thought he caught a glimpse of what the devil might look like.

"You're better than I thought you were," Kakashi paused, and then shook his head in sad realization. "Iruka didn't stand a chance against you. His parents dead, uprooted from his home, raped by a stranger…trying to stay strong and so desperate to break down. He must have looked just like a big target to you."

"Eh, I wasn't as practiced then as I am now. If you recall, my situation wasn't much different from his. I just decided then that I was going to quit pretending I cared about what other people thought. I didn't have anything to hold me back, so I could do whatever I wanted. I wanted Iruka. I wanted a lot of things back then." Mizuki's voice was getting softer, less wild. He was slumping now, more than standing, and Kakashi wasn't sure if Mizuki even knew where he was.

"What do you want now?" Kakashi asked, possessed by a strange curiosity. Mizuki took another drink and slid down his cabinet to sit cross-legged on the floor. Mizuki laughed, his head tilting back against the wood.

"Things I can't have. It's karma I guess, for all those years I took what I shouldn't have taken. I want to be young again. I want my parents back. I want to go back and do it all over again. I could have changed, maybe, a long time ago. Iruka gave me a ring once, you know." Mizuki smiled fondly. "Maybe a part of me wants to go back to that time and be good to him. Iruka was my first, and I guess that makes him special. When I was with him, a small part of me still cared what he thought. It didn't last long, but it was nice. Could have had kids or bought a dog or something. I'll go out with a bang though. I'm dying, but I'm going to live my way one last time before I go."

Kakashi sighed. Mizuki was just rambling. The alcohol had washed him into oblivion. He only had one more question.

"When Iruka shuts down – when he won't respond and just obeys – what's going on in his head?" Mizuki looked up at him, as if trying to remember who he was.

"He's getting wasted. Good people that don't take drugs, or drink, or just beat the shit out of someone else, have to do something when they can't cope anymore. So Iruka just goes in his head for a little holiday. That's the bad thing about breaking people down. Sometimes you break them into so many pieces that they can't reassemble their masks again. I thought last week he'd gone for good. I was going to kill him, just to put him out of his misery. Then you showed up. Good riddance, I thought. Doesn't surprise me that he's doing it again."

Kakashi left without saying another word. Mizuki just watched him go.

* * *

When he returned to the house, it was not yet dark. Iruka was dressed again, cooking in the kitchen. Kakashi was surprised that he was out of whatever funk he'd been in. When Kakashi came in, Iruka glanced up and gave him an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry I lost it. Guess I just shut down for a while. Do you want to talk some more?" he asked.

He was trying to make him happy, Kakashi realized. Mizuki, who felt too miserable to pretend, would hate that fake smile when he knew what was behind it. He'd want to break it. He'd want Iruka to be honest with him. Kakashi wanted that, too, but he couldn't use Mizuki's method. He didn't want to hurt Iruka. He'd have to be careful with his words and say just the right thing.

"Iruka, does it make you upset when you think that you're not making me happy?" Kakashi asked. Iruka's eyes narrowed, and the mask slipped.

"You've been talking to Mizuki. Listening to him as if he's sane. Maybe now you don't think so low of me to have fallen for his bullshit."

"I underestimated him, and I didn't understand why you needed him. Now I do," Kakashi said gently. Iruka's eyes flashed, and Kakashi realized there was something monstrous in Iruka. It was something wounded and dark and sick that he'd been suppressing for a long, long time. Kakashi began to feel a little frightened—like he was getting in way over his head.

But if he was drowning, it was because he was trying to pull Iruka out of the water. He'd have to be strong.

"You have one chat with Mizuki and you think you know me. Well you don't. I loved Mizuki because he was my first and because I clung to him after my parents died. It's not because of what Mizuki says – about me liking it when he hurts me."

Kakashi started to doubt what he'd been so sure of just minutes before. Iruka relaxed, and Kakashi realized he was being read like an open book. Iruka spent his life making other people happy, so he knew how to read him – knew what was going through his head probably at the same time he thought it. Iruka knew just what to say, and just how to respond to him. So he'd have to do something Iruka didn't expect. It was a game, and the stakes were high.

"I love you, and I know you're not happy. I may not know how to help you, but I'm staying right here for however long it takes." Iruka's eyes flashed again. That was a good sign.

"Well, I'm afraid I'm going to have to blow a hole in Mizuki's theory, which you've swallowed hook, line, and sinker. Contrary to what he says, I do give in to what I want from time to time. I don't appreciate the fact you think I'm sick in the head now, and I don't like the superior attitude you have towards me. I wanted to do this on good terms, but I'm leaving you. I might be leaving Konoha completely. I tried it here, and it's just not working out. I know you'd be happier if I stayed, but I'd be happier if I leave, so I'm leaving."

"You say that, but really you think that if you leave, I'll be happy again," Kakashi retorted. Iruka glared at him hotly.

"Quit being dense! I don't love you! I don't care if you're happy or sad or whatever! You were just a rebound after the man I really love broke my heart – again! I'm leaving because this past month has been the hardest month of my life, and that's saying something!" Iruka yelled. Kakashi's doubts increased. He moved to sit in a dining room chair. He felt too weak to stand. He clutched his face.

"I don't understand any of this."

"Kakashi, look at me," Iruka encouraged. Kakashi reluctantly pulled his hands away from his face. "I told you this was more than you could handle. It's more than I can handle, sometimes. I'm not playing any games with you, and if I were you, I'd dismiss whatever Mizuki told you." Iruka sighed and came closer to him, reaching out to run his fingers through Kakashi's hair. "Even if you think what he says sounds right, he's not a guy you want to take advice from. But he can get into your head. I know. He's always been good at that."

"You're leaving," Kakashi said dumbly. Iruka stepped away again.

"I really think it's best. Naruto's going to be upset, of course, but I can't keep living down the street from Mizuki with him teaching my son. I'm getting tired, and it's getting harder and harder to keep my faith that everything's just going to turn out happily ever after for everyone."

"Everything we went through was for nothing," Kakashi said disbelievingly. Iruka gave him a considering look.

"I guess you could look at it like that. I prefer to think that I learned a lot and made a lot of mistakes that I'm not going to repeat again. To be honest, my plan now is to find some woman that will be a good mother to Naruto and try to make up for all the disappointment I've caused him."

"That's stupid, Iruka. You aren't straight. That won't make you happy, and that doesn't even make sense," Kakashi hissed irritably. Iruka just shrugged.

"I don't know what else to do. I didn't realize the world would judge my child because of who I'm fucking. Well, I guess I did realize it. I just didn't want to admit it. I was wrapped up in Mizuki's games and falling for your charm. It was easy to pretend my actions wouldn't have an effect on Naruto. I've just been deluding myself, and I've been very selfish. This move was about Naruto, but I've fucked things up so badly that I can't bear to stay here. The real victim of all this is Naruto."

"When I came in, you said you wanted to talk about it – like we could work this out."

"I meant talk about it like we're doing. Nothing can work this out. It's gotten too…too…tangled." Iruka ran a hand through his hair.

"I'm good at untying knots. Let's just consider all your options," Kakashi said calmly. Iruka sighed, but came to sit at the table. He was at least willing to hear him out. Kakashi took a deep breath. "Alright. The first option is that you can stay in Konoha. Naruto can keep going to school and you and I can stay together. We can keep trying to learn from each other until we make it work. If anyone tries to hurt you or Naruto, I can take care of you," Kakashi said. Iruka stared at him expectantly. Kakashi smiled sadly. "I was kind of hoping you'd like how option one sounded and I wouldn't have to come up with any others."

Iruka grinned. "It does sound good, but it isn't working. We fight more than we should, and I don't like that. I'm not over Mizuki and I'm using you as a rebound. I don't like that either, especially if you are starting to care for me."

"But we're doing good now, aren't we? We're talking things out instead of just fucking. You're telling me how you feel. This is working, isn't it?" Kakashi asked a bit desperately. Iruka shook his head, but at the same time he looked thoughtful.

"I'm just…tired of all of this. Aren't you tired?" Iruka replied.

"I love you. I don't want to consider any option that means you leave me."

"You keep saying you love me," Iruka protested.

"Because I do love you. I don't look down on you, I just get angry and say what I think will hurt you. It's what I'm trained to do as a ninja – to recognize weaknesses and exploit them. It's hard on you, I know, but you have to know that it's not how I really feel. I see you as my equal. I care about Naruto. I want him to look up to me and approve of me being with you." Kakashi gently took Iruka's hand. "Sometimes how fast everything is going between you and me is overwhelming, but I want it at the same time. I want that happy ending with you. I want to protect you from anyone that would hurt you, and I want to stand up to this village and tell them that you're my lover and that you're a good, kind person with every right to live well in Konoha." Kakashi looked deep in Iruka's eyes and then leaned forward, sweetly brushing his lips over Iruka's. "Tell me how you feel, please. Talk to me."

Iruka shook his head, as if the situation still seemed too hopeless to him. "I'm mad at Mizuki. I'm worried for Naruto. I'm upset that people I don't even know are judging me, and that your friends think poorly of me. I'm tired of worrying about how you feel, and trying to force something emotional out of something that was originally just sexual. Mostly, I just wish I could be alone."

Kakashi was quiet, thoughtful. He let go of Iruka's hand.

"This is one of those times where I have to let you go so you can be happy, isn't it?" Kakashi asked sadly. Iruka nodded slowly.

"I think it is. I have a lot to figure out, and I just can't get my head straight here," Iruka said. "But it means a lot to me that you're actually listening to me. It makes me think that maybe you really do love me." Iruka smiled at him hopefully. Kakashi couldn't find it in himself to return it.

"Yeah, I guess I do." Iruka stood and returned to the kitchen. Kakashi sat still, just trying to wrap his mind around everything that had been said.

"There's one other thing I need to talk about with you," Iruka said. Kakashi waited – it couldn't be any worse than the news that Iruka was dumping him. "I was hoping that after Naruto and I leave, you'd take care of Sasuke. He needs someone to love him like a parent."

"I can do that," Kakashi agreed, after considering it for a little while. Sasuke was a good kid and a quick learner. He'd make an excellent ninja one day – possibly even A.N.B.U. Captain like himself. Kakashi sighed. Naruto and Sasuke would be upset that they'd have to leave each other, and it would crush Naruto that he couldn't become a ninja. Had Iruka considered that?

"What about Naruto's dream?" Iruka had been stirring a pot of stew, but he stopped and put the spoon down.

"It's just a dream. Kids change their minds about what they want to be when they grow up all the time. Naruto will find a new dream." There was a heavy, sad silence in the kitchen that Kakashi couldn't bear.

"Is there anything I can do to change your mind?" Kakashi asked, swallowing thickly. Iruka turned to consider him, really thinking about the question.

"I don't think there is. I'm sorry, though. I never meant to hurt you."

"I think…I need to be alone for awhile," Kakashi said slowly. Iruka nodded in understanding. Kakashi stood and left the apartment. His feet carried him through the village and past the graveyard, into the woods where a stone stood in a clearing. He couldn't find the words for anything – couldn't even keep a thought in his head. He trailed his fingertips over the cold rock, pausing on names that he knew. He found Obito's name on autopilot and tried to draw strength from the letters, but it was just a carving. It offered him nothing.

Kakashi slid to the ground and hung his head. He buried his hands in his hair and his shoulders shook. Tears leaked steadily out of his Sharingan, splotching his forehead protector with moisture.

There was a whistle of chakra, and an A.N.B.U. was standing in the clearing behind him. Kakashi instantly stopped shaking, and pressed the palm of his hand against his Sharingan, pressing the metal harshly to force the tears to stop.

"What is it, Bear?" Kakashi asked in a flat tone.

"The Hokage requests your presence, sir."

Without replying, Kakashi used a jutsu to appear in his bedroom. Thankfully, Iruka was in the kitchen and remained none the wiser. He dressed quickly and exited through the window, Hound mask firmly in place, emotions effectively sealed away.

When he appeared in the office, the other two A.N.B.U. bowed to him respectfully. Bear was there, along with Cat. Sarutobi glanced up at him from under his Hokage hat and then nodded to himself, shuffling some papers on his desk. He began to brief them on their mission. A rogue ninja was fleeing Amegakure with a hostage. He was approaching Konoha from the north, and needed to be found and killed. He was number 16 in the Bingo Book.

Kakashi nodded, and Sarutobi dissmissed Bear and Cat.

"There is another matter we need to discuss. I have been doing a great deal of thinking about the Fox Demon."

"His name is Naruto," Kakashi interrupted blandly, almost disrespectfully. Sarutobi glanced at him sharply. There was a long pause, but then Sarutobi continued speaking.

"The parents of several clans have insisted Mizuki-san be removed from his position at the Academy, but he will not be forced to leave Konoha. I gave no authorization for Umino Iruka to be evicted, but I fear some villagers might take the issue into their own hands."

"He's leaving," Kakashi said. Sarutobi puffed on his pipe, his brown eyes thoughtful.

"I'm glad to hear it. I have decided to ask an old student of mine to train Naruto. It would kill two birds with one stone if Umino-san would be willing to seek him out with Naruto in tow. My student does not like to linger in Konoha, so he constantly travels. Konoha will fund the trip and the training expenses for the three of them. It will appease the villagers that Umino-san is leaving, and Naruto will be able to continue his training. When you return from your mission, I'll give you a scroll to deliver to Umino-san that will explain everything."

Kakashi was silent.

"You…care about him, Hound?" Sarutobi asked gently. Kakashi didn't reply. He didn't need to.

"I'm sorry that it has to be like this. Dismissed."

Kakashi nodded and disappeared, focused entirely on the mission – refusing to allow himself to wallow in sadness. It seemed like there was nothing he could do.

* * *

**A/N: **Thanks for all your reviews, and I'll be replying to some of them in the last chapter, which I'm posting as soon as I post this one.


	14. Transitions

**Chapter 14**  
_"Transitions"_

Iruka wondered if he was doing the right thing. He stood in the kitchen long after dinner was finished simply thinking.

He remembered his first time with Kakashi – there was no way he could forget that. His usual clients were old and fat, but Kakashi had come in like some sex god descending to Earth. He'd been so mysterious and reserved. Iruka smiled as he remembered the way Kakashi had told him not to fake anything. The sex had been great. Even then, Kakashi had been concerned with Iruka's pleasure as well as his own.

Then they had moved and Kakashi came back into his life to save it, and then to help them get settled in Konoha. He'd used his influence to get Naruto into school, and then trained the boy personally. Mizuki, the one that got away for Iruka, had come back into his life like a tornado, but Kakashi had stayed. He gave him flowers. He defended him. He pulled out his chair for him.

He said he loved him.

Iruka's eyes became troubled. There was a great deal that he regretted when it came to Kakashi. He had tried not to lead him on, but he had still flirted and teased him, because he knew that he could not have the one he wanted and that he _could_ have Kakashi. He chose Mizuki over Kakashi every time, but still came running to Kakashi when he wasn't strong enough to live with the consequences. But Kakashi wasn't perfect, either.

He knew that Kakashi's actions spoke louder than his words, but sometimes the man said things that ripped his confidence apart faster than a knife through tissue paper. Iruka was already hurt, and Kakashi wasn't always very sensitive. He tried, but sometimes he just hurt him more without even realizing it. Kakashi was always promising to give him time and space, while pressuring him into being closer at the same time. Kakashi wanted to possess him, and he didn't think things through when it came to accomplishing that aim. Kakashi had attacked Mizuki just for comforting him. He destroyed part of his old apartment just because he was jealous and pissed off, and probably would have killed Mizuki with the smallest provocation, even though he'd promised he'd stay out of it. He used Naruto when it suited him, and sometimes acted more childishly than Naruto did. Iruka may have been younger physically, but he felt like he was much older than Kakashi, and that their experience levels were too far apart. Iruka was not sixteen anymore, and he didn't like being in a relationship that made him feel that way.

It was time to be sensible and re-gain control of his life. That meant he had to get away from Mizuki and finally get over him, and end things between Kakashi and himself before things got even messier.

Naruto and Sasuke came home. Iruka put on a happy face and served the boys their dinner. They said thanks and when the meal was done, the boys worked on their homework while Iruka cleaned up the kitchen. Kakashi didn't come home, and Iruka began to worry. He put the boys to bed and sat in the living room waiting. He was tired of thinking, so he just blanked out while minutes became hours and the hours brought daylight.

Kakashi was still not back. Iruka yawned hugely and realized he couldn't skip work to continue waiting. He wrote Kakashi a note that seemed insufficient to express his worry, and then got dressed for work. He made breakfast and took the boys to school on autopilot. Mizuki didn't show up for work, and Iruka worried about that, too. It was a long day.

Kakashi spent the night hunting with his dogs, and was eventually successful. Bear found the rogue first, but Kakashi was hot on his trail. By the time Kakashi reached the battling ninjas, the hostage was dead and Bear had taken serious injuries. Kakashi saved his life by taking a blow aimed at Bear that would have been critical. At the last moment, Cat deflected the weapon slightly, and Kakashi merely took a kunai to the arm instead of the heart. It was a long night.

* * *

Cat helped him carry Bear through the forest, complaining loudly the whole way.

"You should have called for help first, you dumbass!"

"Shut up, Anko. I'm dying, in case you didn't notice. Your voice bitching isn't the last thing I want to hear before I go into the light," Bear hissed at her.

"You're not dying, Bear. You'll be fine," Kakashi said blandly.

"Only because you took that blow for me. Why do you _do_ that?" Bear asked in irritation. Kakashi knew the young man hated being rescued. He was independent minded, and he resented that Kakashi often had to step in to save his hide. Bear did not work well on a team. It was one of his biggest weaknesses.

"I protect the people on my team," Kakashi replied dully. Anko grunted.

"God, Tenzo, you weigh a ton! Ever think about going on a diet?"

"I am not fat!" Tenzo replied.

"Use your codenames when you're in uniform," Kakashi reminded uselessly. As he suspected they would, they ignored him. It didn't really matter. No one was around anyway.

"Ugh! Can't you walk a _little_, Tenzo?" Anko whined. Kakashi sighed in irritation.

"Set him down. I'll carry him myself," Kakashi ordered. Anko, long accustomed to his clipped orders, dropped Tenzo without much consideration. Tenzo cussed at her.

Kakashi scooped him up as if he were carrying a bride. Anko snickered at Tenzo's disgusted face.

"This is humiliating," Tenzo said, letting his head fall back on Kakashi's arm.

"Should I hum the bridal march?" Anko teased.

"If it's humiliating, next time you should call for backup instead of taking on more than you can handle," Kakashi spat angrily. Anko and Tenzo gave him worried looks.

"Captain…you okay? You seem a little on edge," Anko was brave enough to comment. Kakashi glared at her through his mask in answer. She held up her hands defensively. "Alright! Alright! No personal questions on missions. I know!"

Kakashi didn't get to enjoy the silence long. Soon, Tenzo and Anko were bickering again. Kakashi was grateful to see Konoha come into view.

"Damn! It's practically lunchtime. Let me walk. I don't want anyone seeing me being carried like this," Tenzo gritted out. His wounds were really beginning to hurt. Kakashi hadn't said anything about the deep gash in his arm, which had only worsened due to carrying Tenzo all the way to Konoha. A bit gratefully, he set Tenzo down on the ground.

"I'm just going to transport you to the hospital," Kakashi said as he leaned over the man to adjust his bear mask. Anko checked hers as well. Fully disguised, Kakashi wrapped his arms around Tenzo from behind. He readied himself to make the jutsu seals. Very few people could transport more than one person, but Kakashi was no ordinary ninja. "Cat, report to the Hokage. Tell him I'll be there shortly."

"On it, Captain!" Anko replied before running through the village gates swiftly, taking to the rooftops almost instantly. Kakashi completed the seals and opened his eye to see the hospital materialize around them.

Immediately, nurses separated them and whisked them in different directions. He was taken to a wing of the hospital reserved for A.N.B.U. ninja. They were always given special and immediate attention. The wound in his arm was healed, and he was asked if he had any other injuries. He told them he was fine, just tired, and they dismissed him. He made his way to the Hokage tower. He was dreading having to accept the scroll he knew was waiting there for him to deliver. When he finally reached the tower, it was late afternoon. Where had the day gone?

He made his way to the Hokage's office and was instantly called in. He made his report and Sarutobi passed him the scroll solemnly. He apologized again, and Kakashi had the insane urge to rip the scroll and just leave.

"How is Bear?" Sarutobi asked. Kakashi sighed.

"He'll be fine."

"Because you saved his life?" Sarutobi asked. Kakashi nodded.

"And Cat saved my life by deflecting the weapon."

"I'll need to speak with Bear about putting himself in such risky positions."

"Good luck with that," Kakashi replied dryly. Sarutobi smiled.

"You're dismissed, Hound. Go home and get some rest."

Just as Kakashi was about to leave, a messenger burst in.

"Hokage, sir, a forbidden scroll was stolen!" Sarutobi stood, his eyes going to Kakashi.

"Hound!" he ordered. He didn't have to say anything more. Kakashi disappeared in a puff of jutsu smoke.

Kakashi ran through the forest, sensing all the other ninja fanning out behind him. They flew through the forest, and Kakashi summoned his dogs for a second time.

"A scroll was stolen. Find it!" Kakashi barked.

"We're on it, boss!" Pakkun assented before the dogs began sniffing like crazy. Kakashi sprinted past them, trying to hone in on the location of the strange chakra disturbances he was feeling. It felt like they were everywhere at once. He went deeper and deeper into the forest, but it was hard to pin down the location of the flickering spikes of chakra. A half hour passed. A few other A.N.B.U. ninja joined up with him to relay information and then split off again. An hour passed.

Cat appeared running below him.

"Captain, did you sense that?" Anko called out.

"I sensed it, but it stopped. There are miles and miles of forest. We could be searching all night. Any information on the ninja who stole it?"

"It was a boy. That's all they know."

"A boy?" Kakashi repeated in surprise. Anko nodded, then fell back and went off to his right, searching a different path. Kakashi veered to the left. After another hour of travel with no luck, he was nearing the border of Fire Country. He slammed to a halt.

Below him, sitting in a clearing, was Naruto.

He had the scroll. Instantly, Kakashi dropped to the ground, tearing his Hound mask away from his face.

"Kakashi! Hey! You found me!" Naruto complimented obliviously. Kakashi grit his teeth beneath his cloth mask.

"Naruto, what the hell do you think you're doing?" he questioned harshly, practically stomping up to the boy. Naruto scrambled to his feet and was about to reply when Mizuki appeared from behind a nearby tree. Kakashi was about to question him, but he pulled Iruka out from behind the tree as well. He was bound and gagged, and Mizuki held him by his hair. He pressed a kunai against his throat.

"Well fuck. This has gotten messy, hasn't it? Kakashi, you weren't supposed to get here so fast!"

"Let him go," Kakashi said calmly. He slowly slid his mask into place, and the significance of it was not lost on Mizuki. He snorted.

"Figures that such a violent prude would be in A.N.B.U.! But you make a single move and he's dead."

Kakashi stayed still. He thought of the hostage that had been killed the previous night. Iruka looked up at him with wide eyes. He shook his head, but Kakashi didn't understand what he was trying to warn him about.

"What's going on here?" Kakashi asked with a calm that he didn't feel. Mizuki laughed, a bit maniacally.

"It's a long story, and I'm short on time. Naruto, bring me the scroll."

Iruka began to shake his head furiously, and Mizuki shook him hard by his hair.

"Naruto, don't listen to him. Bring me the scroll," Kakashi ordered. Naruto hesitated, unsure of what to do. Mizuki grinned.

"If you take it to him, I'm going to kill your daddy," Mizuki threatened. "If you bring it to me, I'll trade you your dad for the scroll."

"Naruto, I said don't move!" Kakashi barked when Naruto began to drag the large scroll towards Mizuki. Then Kakashi saw it. It was an elaborate trap, set so that whoever passed a certain point would be immediately decapitated. Someone with as little training as Naruto wouldn't be able to dodge in time. Kakashi could trip the wire to save Naruto, but in the time that took, Mizuki would kill Iruka. He would just have to go straight for Iruka and not activate the trap.

"Thinking about coming after your boyfriend?" Mizuki taunted. Kakashi hesitated. "Yeah, that's smart not to move. I didn't expect you so soon, but I did prepare for you. See, this is it. Once I kill the fox demon, I don't care what happens to me. I thought I might be able to use the scroll to buy my way into an enemy village if things went smoothly, but if not, I have this backup plan to just blow us all up."

"That's crazy," Kakashi said flatly. Mizuki grinned.

"What demon?" Naruto asked. Iruka began to cry. Mizuki laughed.

"Daddy didn't tell you? I guess he wouldn't. See, I told your daddy once that you had said something interesting to me. It made your daddy so scared…I began to get suspicious about what he was hiding from me. Then you had your little spar with Sasuke during class that got so heated, and I got a glimpse of the seal on your stomach. It was easy to figure out that you had the Fox Demon inside of you."

"I don't!" Naruto protested, but Kakashi could tell the boy believed what he was hearing.

"The same monster that killed my parents – that killed Iruka's parents – is inside of YOU. That's why I brought along Iruka. I know that deep inside he wants to see you die. He hates you for killing his parents. Isn't that right, Iruka?" Mizuki jerked Iruka's head up sharply, and the kunai bit into his skin. Iruka's face was covered in tears, but there was little he could do. If he shook his head no, he'd be slitting his own throat. Kakashi knew he had to act, but now he wasn't sure of what the situation was. The tiniest mistake could cost Iruka or Naruto their lives.

"Killing you is the only thing left in this world that I want, and I _always_ get what I want," Mizuki laughed and said mockingly, "That's my way of the ninja! You're going to die here, Naruto, so the question is this: do you want to kill your daddy, too? If not, bring me the scroll."

Naruto bowed his head, and Kakashi felt panic well up in him. If he so much as moved, Mizuki would kill Iruka. He'd rushed into the clearing without making clones, and now he was paying for his lack of foresight. He sent a mental message to Pakkun, but the dogs were tracking far away. Help might not arrive in time.

"I won't let you hurt my dad," Naruto said in a hard voice. Then Kakashi saw it. From behind Mizuki, a clone of Naruto was steadily creeping closer. Kakashi glanced upwards, and there was another one up in a tree. They were hiding everywhere – and there must have been hundreds of them. Was the Naruto in front of him a clone, too? He couldn't tell.

Naruto must have learned the forbidden multiplication technique that created real clones. It was unbelievable, and it was a miracle. Naruto charged forward suddenly, and Kakashi couldn't risk hoping he was just a clone. He darted forward and pushed Naruto to the ground. In the process, the enormous shuriken that had been hidden in the trees sliced through the air and embedded itself deeply in his back. Mizuki laughed maniacally.

His laughter was cut short when the Naruto underneath Kakashi disappeared in a puff of smoke, and another one came hurdling towards Mizuki with a kunai. Startled, Mizuki dropped Iruka in order to defend himself. They came out of the trees like insects, one after another after another. Mizuki sliced through as many as he could, but he was eventually overwhelmed. One clone got in a lucky shot and Mizuki fell to the ground, bleeding heavily from numerous wounds. The clones began to pop away, and soon only the real Naruto was standing beside his dad. Keeping an eye on Mizuki, he cut the ropes binding Iruka and removed the gag. Iruka turned and hugged his son fiercely, and then rushed to Kakashi's side.

"Kakashi, are you okay?" Kakashi grunted and pulled himself to his knees. Preparing himself for the pain, Kakashi roughly pulled the weapon from his back. Iruka winced in sympathy. Kakashi took a big, shuddering breath and got to his feet, Iruka aiding him to stand. Mizuki was dying, but his fingers were slowly pulling a kunai from his pouch. Naruto didn't notice, but Kakashi staggered over to him and stepped on his bloody hand. He heard the crunch of bone.

"You won't be activating anymore traps. It's over, so just die," Kakashi said coldly. Iruka wiped at his tears and then grabbed Kakashi's hand. He pulled on him until Kakashi was forced to step back. Carefully, Iruka guided him to sit on the ground. He pulled off his long sleeve shirt and tied the arms around Kakashi's torso, trying to stop some of the bleeding.

"Naruto, give me your jacket," he ordered. The blonde boy pulled off his jacket and passed it to his father wordlessly. Iruka balled it up and held it against the deep wound, ignoring Kakashi's wince of pain. "Come here, Naruto, and hold your jacket just like this." Naruto quickly obeyed. When Naruto was in place, Iruka shot him a look that begged forgiveness.

He carefully crawled to Mizuki's side.

"Mizuki?" he asked gently. The man's eyes rolled upwards to see Iruka. With tears spilling down his cheeks, Iruka gently thread his fingers through Mizuki's hair. "I'm right here. I'll stay with you until…until you go. Don't be afraid."

"Baby…cheeks…" Mizuki forced out. Blood spilled down his chin. Iruka pressed a finger to his lips, smearing the blood.

"Shh…don't try to speak, baby. Just close your eyes and listen. Remember…remember that night we gave you a surprise birthday party? Everyone was there. We all had so much fun. You said…you said that if you could, you would make the night last forever. None of us would die. We'd all stay there as friends, young and enjoying life, because that's all you ever wanted. You wanted so badly for that to last, so picture it now. You're going to a better place now, baby, where life won't be so hard on you."

"Remember me, 'Ruka," Mizuki slurred. Kakashi winced. He wanted to look away, but he couldn't. His heart burned with jealousy, but he couldn't stop watching.

"I'll remember you, always," Iruka promised, leaning over to gently kiss Mizuki's forehead.

"I'm sorry…'Ruka…" Mizuki coughed out. Iruka wiped at his tears that just kept coming and coming.

"I know you are. I forgive you. I love you. I'll always love you. I promised to, remember?"

"I don't…deserve it," Mizuki said, his own tears making little rivulets down his face and onto Iruka's hands. Iruka was crying too hard to reply. "Tell…Tsubaki…sorry," Mizuki managed to slur. Iruka nodded. Mizuki smiled up gently at Iruka, and then the life faded away from his eyes.

Kakashi sensed Anko enter the clearing, still in uniform. One of his dogs was with her, and Kurenai came running into the clearing moments later. Cat immediately rushed to his side.

"A med-nin is coming, Captain. Hang on," she said. Kurenai started towards Iruka and Mizuki, but Iruka stood.

"He'd dead. Worry about Kakashi," Iruka said. She nodded, moving to pick up the scroll that had been left in the middle of the clearing. More ninjas arrived. One was dressed in solid white, and he immediately went to Kakashi's side. He pulled away the makeshift bandages and began to heal Kakashi in a way Iruka had never seen before. Naruto clung to his father's leg tightly, watching with big eyes as Kakashi's wound slowly began to seal.

"He's going to be fine. How do you feel, Hound?" the med-nin asked. Kakashi nodded and waved him off. Kurenai, who had passed the scroll off to Asuma, was inspecting the area.

"This whole place is rigged with exploding tags!" she said. Immediately, the ninjas that had been lingering at the scene fanned out to destroy the tags. Weakly, Kakashi stood. There was a moment that he and Iruka simply stared at each other, but then Kurenai came and looped her arm around Kakashi. "Let's get you back to Konoha." She shot a challenging glare at Iruka when Kakashi couldn't see. Feeling like he'd just been warned to stay out of it, Iruka squatted down to look Naruto in the eye. His son was crying quietly. Iruka cleaned his hands on his pants and then gently wiped Naruto's tears away. He kissed his son's forehead. The med-nin hovered near by, so Iruka turned to tell him they were fine.

"Dad, is it true?" Naruto asked. Iruka nodded.

"But Mizuki was sick, Naruto. He didn't know what he was saying. I love you. You're my precious, precious son. I would never want to see you hurt. You know that, right?"

"I know," Naruto said. He threw his arms around Iruka's neck and hugged him tightly. Iruka fell back, Naruto still clinging to him. "I was so scared!" Naruto confessed.

"You were brave, Naruto. I don't know what you did, or how you did it, but you saved my life. I'm very proud of you," Iruka soothed.

"Aren't you mad at me, for killing your friend?" Naruto asked, his eyes getting watery again.

"No, little cat, I'm not mad at you. You did the right thing. One day I'll explain this to you, but right now just know that I love you, and everything's going to be okay."

Naruto let go of him and offered to help him up. The medical ninja looked them over, as if doubting that they were really unharmed.

"Let me escort you to the Hokage tower," the med-nin said. Iruka nodded. "It's a bit of a walk," the man warned. Naruto grabbed his father's hand and held it tightly. Despite what Iruka had said to Naruto, he knew that nothing might be okay. The battle had just begun.

* * *

Iruka was exhausted. Someone had been kind enough to bring him a shirt, and he'd been sitting with his son in the Hokage's office for the past three hours. Ninjas kept coming in and going out, and the Hokage had to step out constantly to tend to things. At one point someone brought him and Naruto a sandwich.

"Let me get this straight," Sarutobi said wearily. "During lunch, you noticed Mizuki-san waving to you from outside the Academy gates. You left the others on the playground and went to see what he wanted. What did he tell you?"

Naruto put down his sandwich and swallowed the bite he'd just taken.

"He told me that there was a way I could become a Chuunin like him, but that I had to get a scroll for him and learn what was on it."

"And then what did he tell you?" Sarutobi asked sternly. Naruto scratched idly at his head.

"He told me how to get to the clearing in the woods, and that I should bring it there."

"Alright, so then you came here and took the scroll."

"Nobody was watching it, but Mizuki-sensei told me to be sneaky. If I got caught, I wouldn't get to be a Chuunin."

"So you took the scroll to the woods?" Sarutobi asked. Naruto nodded.

"But I kinda forgot where I was supposed to be going. So I stopped at this old shack I found and started to read the scroll. There was a lot of writing on it, and I only could learn the first technique."

"You learned the multiplication technique?" Sarutobi asked doubtfully. Naruto nodded.

"Yeah, and then I remembered where I was supposed to go. I couldn't figure out how to get rid of the clones, so they just came with me." Sarutobi shook his head as if he couldn't believe it.

"How many clones did you make, Naruto? Two? Three?" he asked. Naruto shook his head.

"There were about a hundred or so at first, but some of them disappeared as I got closer. I got tired running so far." Sarutobi sat in silence. Then he puffed on his pipe a bit and leaned forward.

"Then what?" he asked, almost as if he was listening to a story. Iruka could tell he didn't believe what Naruto was saying, but Iruka could see his son wasn't lying. He knew how Naruto acted when he lied, and all signs told him Naruto was telling the truth.

"Well, one of my clones that was running ahead found the clearing. He was talking to Mizuki-sensei. The rest of us thought it would be fun to surprise Mizuki-sensei, so we crept up and hid."

"What did Mizuki-san say to your clone?" Sarutobi asked. Naruto scowled as he tried to remember.

"He just said that he was impressed that I got the scroll. Then he said he sensed someone else coming, and he hid again. I didn't know what was going on. Then Kakashi came. He was alone, and he was mad. Then Mizuki-sensei pulled my dad from behind the tree! I hadn't seen him earlier. He was hurting my dad. Mizuki-sensei didn't know about my clones, so I surprised him. But he set a trap for me, and Kakashi saw it when I didn't. I set the trap off with my clone, but Kakashi protected me, 'cause he didn't know it was just a clone. Then my clones and me beat up Mizuki-sensei. I didn't mean to kill him, I promise! It was an accident! I just didn't want him hurting my dad or Kakashi."

"Okay, okay," Sarutobi said, his voice soothing but patronizing at the same time. Iruka scowled at him.

"He's telling the truth," Iruka interrupted sharply. "Mizuki told me what his plan was as he dragged me through the woods." Sarutobi looked at him intensely, and his expression turned very serious.

"If this is in fact true, I'm all the more convinced that my choice was the correct one. Kakashi-san informed me about Naruto's…condition." Iruka clenched his fists tightly in his lap. "Here is the decision I have reached. An old student of mine is talented with seals and attacks that require lots of chakra, which Naruto seems to have. I want the two of you to find him and give him a letter from me instructing him to train Naruto. I don't know how long this training will take. This will also serve to remove you from the village," Sarutobi said as he gave Iruka a meaningful look. The brunette man felt a stab of pain in his chest. People didn't want him in the village because of something as stupid as who he slept with. "Your traveling expenses will, of course, be paid for by the village."

Iruka sighed. Maybe it was actually a blessing. Naruto would still get to be a ninja, and it would allow them to leave Konoha. He wouldn't have to worry about money anymore, and Naruto would see a bit of the world. It was perfect, really.

An image of Kakashi flashed in Iruka's mind, but he stubbornly ignored it.

"That sounds fine," Iruka agreed.

"Really, dad? You're going to let us go?" Naruto asked excitedly. Iruka gave him a tired smile and nodded.

"Excellent. It would be best if you left as soon as possible, before people start getting curious. Can you set out tomorrow?"

Iruka nodded.

* * *

Sasuke was waiting for them at Kakashi's house. He'd been worried about the reports he'd been hearing around the village. Naruto immediately launched into telling him the story. Iruka rested on the couch, listening to them talk in the dining room. He knew he should have been packing, but he couldn't find the energy to do anything.

Finally, Naruto got to the part where he explained that he'd be leaving for special training.

"You can't leave!" Sasuke interrupted. Naruto suddenly realized it would mean parting with Sasuke. Iruka glanced over the back of the couch just in time to catch Naruto's frown.

"But…the Hokage told us we had to leave," Naruto replied sadly. Iruka stood. He walked into the dining room and placed a hand on Sasuke's shoulder. The little boy was scowling fiercely.

"Sasuke-kun, I know you're upset, but we don't really have a choice. We'll be back one day, though, and you and Naruto can write each other letters. I've asked Kakashi to take care of you while we're gone. He's still going to train you, so that you'll be really strong. Maybe when Naruto and I come back, you and Naruto will be on a team together."

The little boy seemed slightly pacified.

"You promise you'll write me letters?" Sasuke asked Naruto. The blonde boy nodded enthusiastically. "When do you leave?"

"Tomorrow," Naruto said. Sasuke's scowl returned.

"Why so soon?" he asked. Iruka gently ruffled his hair.

"The Hokage thinks that will be best. Speaking of leaving tomorrow, Naruto, you need to get into bed and get some sleep." Sasuke and Naruto stood up from the table and went to the bathroom without protest. Both of them were very quiet and sad. Iruka sighed and moved to clean up the kitchen.

Kakashi still wasn't back. Iruka was once again torn where Kakashi was concerned. On one hand, he'd taken a serious blow to protect his son. On the other hand, he'd told Naruto's secret when Iruka had begged him not to. The man was simply frustrating.

While the boys disappeared into the bedroom, Iruka began to collect their things. They would have to travel light. It was a good thing they'd already gotten rid of their furniture.

Iruka had a backpack tucked away somewhere. He'd found it while he'd been unpacking. He went to search for it wearily, not really feeling up to the task but doing it just to keep his mind off Mizuki.

He packed his picture of his parents, and the clothes he thought were most suitable into his backpack. He bundled the rest of his things into the big bag he'd used for the first move. It was mostly clothes, but a few things he couldn't bear to throw away. He packed those things into a smaller bag and left a note on top, asking Kakashi if he'd hold onto them for him until they came back. He would pack up Naruto's things in the morning.

He didn't want to be in the bed in case Kakashi came back, so he slept on the couch. He was so exhausted that he passed out easily. When he awoke, it was because someone was shaking him. He shot up, bumping foreheads with Kakashi.

"Ow!" he whispered, massaging his head. Kakashi didn't reply. He simply stared down at him. "Kakashi…are you okay?" Iruka asked gently. The silver haired ninja turned and headed for the bedroom.

"You were having a nightmare," was all he said. Then he disappeared into his bedroom.

Iruka sighed and flopped back down on the couch. It was best that he let Kakashi shut him out and heal in his own way. He fell back asleep, but it was fitful and he didn't feel well rested when morning came. Kakashi was already gone.

Iruka cooked breakfast for the boys and saw Sasuke off to school. He promised him they wouldn't leave until after he was out and they could say goodbye. Then he helped Naruto pack his things, and wrote a longer note to Kakashi that he put with the first one he'd written about the bag.

With a deep breath and quite a few regrets, Iruka left Kakashi's apartment around mid-afternoon.

"What else do we have to go do?" Naruto asked. Iruka took his hand and the two of them headed through town. He doubted Tsubaki would go to the market today.

"We're going to find out where Tsubaki lives and go tell her goodbye."

"Okay," Naruto happily agreed. Iruka could tell he was excited about meeting his new sensei. At the market they asked around near Tsubaki's stand and were given her address by a kindly old woman. They made their way to her house, not really talking. Naruto could sense that his father wanted some quiet.

Tsubaki invited them inside and quickly hugged Iruka. Feeling her pain, Iruka returned the embrace. Iruka didn't ask if she was okay, because he knew she wasn't. He wasn't either.

"The Hokage wants us to leave. Naruto is going to get special training," Iruka said once they had pulled apart.

"So you came to say goodbye?" Tsubaki asked sadly. Iruka nodded.

"Unfortunately, yes. I'm sorry. I know it's going to be hard on you."

"They've asked me to clean out his apartment," Tsubaki said with tears in her eyes. Iruka winced sympathetically.

"I wish I could help you. At least I can at least write you letters. You can write to me, too, and I'll read them all when we get back," Iruka promised. Tsubaki nodded.

"That might help," Tsubaki said quietly. Naruto tugged on her apron.

"When we come back, will your baby be out of your belly?" Naruto asked. Tsubaki gave him a small smile.

"I don't know. I hope you make it back before then," she said. "Are you hungry Naruto? I can cook you some lunch if you'd like."

"That'd be great!" Naruto said happily.

"Let me help you in the kitchen," Iruka suggested. "Naruto, why don't you play outside until lunch is ready?"

"Okay!" Naruto ran outside without protest, eager to be out in the sunshine on such a pretty day.

In the kitchen, Iruka and Tsubaki watched him play through the window.

"Any reservations I had about you vanished when I met Naruto. You're a good father, and you've raised him well. I've heard the rumors that some people wanted to run you out of town. I'm sorry," Tsubaki said quietly. Iruka shrugged.

"It's alright. I want to go. It's been hard here. If I could go back in time, I would never have come," Iruka confessed, thinking bitterly about Mizuki's death. Tsubaki began to cook while they talked.

"What about Kakashi-san?" she asked. Iruka began to chop the vegetables she passed to him.

"He and I aren't working out. We're too different, we fight too much, and I'm still getting over Mizuki. It's better if he finds someone that can love him like he deserves to be loved."

"At least you're honest with him," Tsubaki said. Iruka nodded.

"I know he doesn't understand, but it took so much out of me to be with him. I feel tired and used. I just want to get away from everything. I know it's selfish, but I can't help it."

"You're doing the right thing, Iruka. I'll keep an eye on Kakashi, and make sure he moves on."

"Thank you. You're a good friend, Tsubaki," Iruka said with a small smile.

"Did…did he suffer much?" Tsubaki asked, almost in a whisper. Iruka sighed.

"Kakashi was angry with him. He was cruel to him, but I pulled him away. What point is there in being cruel to a man who's dying? I talked to him gently until it was his time. I think…in the end…he realized the mistakes he'd made. He apologized. He wanted me to tell you he was sorry. It was like he was washed clean. He gave me the same smile he used to give me when we were boys, back before he changed so much."

Tsubaki began to cry, and Iruka took her into his arms. After a little while, Tsubaki pulled herself together.

"I'm glad. Thank you for putting aside your anger to be kind to him in his last moments. I know you hide it, but I can see how much he hurt you. It made you furious when you saw the ring."

"Yes, it did. I guess I'd never really gotten over it the first time he left. When it happened again, I finally began to see things clearly. There were moments when I hated him for how me made me think. I hated how he always twisted everything I said. I hated how naturally that came to him."

"I know," Tsubaki said gently, touching his arm in a comforting way. Iruka nodded and swallowed thickly.

"But he's gone now, and I forgave him in the end. I just have to let my anger go. It won't do me any good."

"That's a good attitude. You're very strong, Iruka, stronger than you realize, I think."

"You and I have to be strong. We have little ones to think about."

"Thank goodness for that, too. Iruka…I've been thinking about this ever since we talked. If I have a son – and I'm almost certain I will – when he's older and needs a man to look up to, will you help him if he needs it?" Iruka felt very touched.

"It would be an honor. Do you think you can talk to Naruto, if he ever needs advice from a great mom?" Iruka asked with a smile. Tsubaki returned it.

"As long as you're the one that tells him where babies come from," Tsubaki said. She and Iruka shared smiles and sat down to wait for lunch to finish cooking. Naruto came in to show them a huge frog he'd captured. Tsubaki smiled when the frog escaped and began hopping about in her kitchen. Iruka and Naruto scrambled to catch it, looking quite ridiculous in the process. Finally Naruto got it back outside, but not before Tsubaki giggled until she was almost breathless. Iruka had to laugh, too.

"That boy is going to wear me out one of these days," Iruka remarked, trying to catch his breath. Tsubaki patted her stomach.

"I can't wait for mine to bring me frogs and get into mischief." Iruka snorted.

"Just you wait. You'll eat those words," Iruka teased. Tsubaki served lunch then, and Iruka went to go call in Naruto. He bounded in sweaty and smiling, his stomach grumbling. Thankfully, after watching him eat at the ramen stand, Tsubaki had known to make a lot.

When the meal was finished, Iruka and Naruto thanked her again and said their goodbyes. Iruka gave her one last hug, and Naruto waved at her happily until they reached the road.

"Where to next, dad?" Naruto asked.

"I want to take you to see where your grandparents are buried. I'd like to take them some flowers." Naruto nodded, and the two of them found the flower shop. The woman who had delivered flowers to him was very cold to him. No doubt she'd heard rumors. Iruka purchased a small bouquet of his mother's favorite flowers, white lilies, and Naruto picked some daisies to give to his grandfather.

As they walked through town, people whispered and a few even pointed. Iruka picked up the pace, worried that the threats might become a reality. They made it to the edge of town before some ninjas and one or two civilian men approached them.

"Hold on a second, Umino," one of the men spat nastily. Iruka braced his shoulders and turned. He passed his flowers to Naruto.

"Go on to the graveyard, Naruto."

"Dad, they don't look friendly…" Naruto protested. Iruka gave him a fatherly glare.

"I said to go, Naruto. I can handle this myself," Iruka said sternly. When his son was out of hearing range, and had disappeared into the small wood up ahead, Iruka looked at the men expectantly.

"People are saying that you're leaving, but we wanted to confirm that personally. You aren't welcome here."

"My son and I are leaving, but not because I'm frightened of you or because I care about what your opinion of me is," Iruka said calmly. One of the ninjas pulled out a knife and spun it threateningly in his palm. Iruka didn't flinch.

"You should be afraid, faggot," he hissed. Iruka stared at him distastefully.

"We aren't children, so quit acting like it. If you want to call people names, maybe you should go back to grade school. I'm sure you had someone in your life teach you not to be rude to people you don't even know."

"You have more guts than I thought you would, but you're still a pervert. Leave Konoha, and don't come back," one of the fiercest looking men spat. Iruka rolled his eyes at him.

"You don't have the power to say who can live here, and I refuse to treat you like you do. Quit harassing me and go do something useful."

"I don't like your attitude," another man complained. He went so far as to step towards Iruka and push him.

It was not the day to fuck with Umino Iruka.

Before the man even realized it, he was on the ground with a busted lip. Iruka rubbed his hand and stared hard at the other men who were sizing him up. No one else moved to attack him. Iruka snorted at their cowardice and turned to walk away. The men watched him go, staring at him hatefully.

He hadn't made it very far into the woods when Naruto appeared, clutching the flowers.

"Are you okay, Dad?" Naruto asked. Iruka nodded and ruffled Naruto's hair. "Why were those guys mad at us?" Naruto asked. Iruka stared at the road ahead of them, his eyes thoughtful.

"Sometimes, Naruto, other people won't approve of the choices you make in life. But if you know you're doing the right thing, don't let other people push you around. Stand up for what you believe in, even if it means that you have to get hurt. People will respect you for that."

Naruto stared up at him for a few long moments, and then nodded. Iruka could tell he was really listening. The trees thinned and then the graveyard appeared after a bend in the road. Respectfully, Iruka walked the rows of stones with Naruto behind him until he found the Umino markers. Surprising his son, Iruka began to speak.

"Mom, Dad, I'm really sorry I haven't come to visit you before. I think about you all the time, and I hope you're happy, wherever you are. I've brought your grandson to meet you. I know you would be just as proud of him as I am. He's a great kid. We brought you your favorite flowers, Mom," Iruka swallowed thickly and forced the words out. "I still have your picture, and I tell Naruto stories about you both all the time. Naruto and I have to leave for a little while, but when we come back, I'm going to do things right. I'm going to make you proud of me, okay? I love you both," Iruka whispered as he gently touched his father's stone. Naruto watched with wide eyes. He looked at the flowers in his hands and untangled the two bouquets. He placed one in front of each stone.

"Grandma?" Naruto asked hesitantly. Iruka encouraged him with a smile. The blonde crouched down as his father was doing and touched his grandmother's stone. "Sometimes, when I'm really good, dad makes your cookies for me. They're the best cookies in the world! I wish you could have made them for me, too. It's sad I can't meet you, but my dad looks a lot like your picture. You were really pretty. We're leaving so that I can train to be a ninja, just like you! Someday I'm going to be the Hokage. Watch over me, okay Grandma?"

Iruka nodded at him with a loving smile and stood, slowly dusting off his pants.

"Hopefully, they'll watch over both of us. Are you ready to go to the Hokage tower now?" Naruto nodded.

"Dad, when Sasuke was crying, was he talking to someone here, too?" Naruto asked.

"He was talking to his parents, Naruto," Iruka said. Naruto looked thoughtful for a few moments.

"Can I talk to them, too?" Iruka nodded, and Naruto found the Uchiha stones. He kneeled and touched Sasuke's mother's stone. "Hi, Sasuke's mom! I have to leave Konoha, and I know you're an angel like my grandma, so will you take extra good care of Sasuke until I can get back? He's mean sometimes, but he's nice on the inside. Thanks!"

Naruto ran to re-join him. Iruka gave him a proud smile.

"That was a nice thing to do, Naruto," Iruka praised. His son just smiled. Hand in hand, the two of them left the graveyard and walked towards the Hokage tower.

Their visit with Sarutobi was the longest. They were given detailed instructions, money, and a scroll to deliver to Jiraiya-san when they found him. Sarutobi suggested they begin their search in a little town to the north where there were some hot springs. When Naruto was occupied looking out the window, Sarutobi told Iruka to search for Jiraiya near the female bathhouse in a low voice.

Iruka began to feel concerned. Just what kind of man were they seeking?

"There's one other thing, Iruka-san. Since Naruto is so intent to become Hokage one day, I'd like to show him around the tower. While I do that, why don't you pay a visit to Kakashi-san before you set out? Last I saw him, he was sitting by the bridge writing a mission report."

Iruka had mixed emotions about visiting Kakashi, but he recognized an order when he heard one. Respectfully, Iruka bowed.

"Thank you for offering to keep an eye on Naruto. I'll go find Kakashi." Iruka turned to address his son, who was half hanging out the window, trying to catch a dragonfly. "Naruto? Be good for the Hokage."

"Huh? Alright," Naruto replied, making another desperate grab for the unlucky bug. Iruka nodded at the Hokage and left.

He'd often seen the bridge from Kakashi's kitchen window. As he approached, he saw Kakashi's shoulders tense. The man sat with his legs dangling off the side of the bridge, scribbling messily on a piece of paper. He slowly stopped writing and set the supplies down beside him. He stood, but he didn't turn towards him. Iruka nervously approached. When he was standing next to him, Iruka dared to peek at his expression. It was stormy.

"How's your back?" Iruka asked quietly. Kakashi didn't answer. The ninja had shut him out, and Iruka didn't blame him. "I know you're probably mad at me, but I don't know what I can do other than apologize. I am sorry. I hope you can forgive me someday," Iruka said. Still, Kakashi didn't reply. Iruka nodded and pushed softly away from the handrail of the bridge. "Thank you for taking that blow for Naruto. If things had been different…well, I guess there's no use talking like that now. We're leaving soon. I don't know when we'll be back. I'd like to write you letters, but I understand if you don't want me to do that," Iruka said, biting his lip nervously. When he still received no response, Iruka sighed and began to walk away. When he was nearly off the bridge, Kakashi half turned.

"Write them," he said blandly. Iruka glanced over his shoulder, and gave him a small nod. Then he walked away, and to his credit, he didn't look back. To Kakashi's credit, he didn't beg him to.

* * *

The last goodbye was to Sasuke, who stood waiting for them at the village gates. Iruka gave the boy a big hug and reminded him to spend time with Kakashi until they could get back.

"Kakashi is sad, too, right now. Will you keep an eye on him for me?" Iruka asked the boy. Sasuke nodded solemnly. Iruka wondered how much Sasuke would grow and change in their absence. Would he be a teenager when Iruka saw him again? He pushed aside his worries and kissed Sasuke's forehead, ignoring the way it made the boy blush. "I'm going to have faith that you'll grow up to be strong and kind, Sasuke-kun. Make me proud, okay?" Iruka asked. Sasuke nodded, a small smile on his face. Iruka left then, giving the two boys some privacy.

Naruto looked at his best friend and idly dragged his foot through the dirt. He stuffed his hands into his pockets, and gripped what he had put in one of them tightly.

"I'll write lots of letters so you know how strong I'm getting. You better train hard while I'm not here!" Naruto said, finally looking into his friend's dark eyes. Sasuke smirked.

"I'll still be tougher than you, so don't get your hopes up," he replied. Naruto grinned a bit.

"Will we still be best friends when I come back?" Naruto asked hopefully. Sasuke glanced around to make sure no one was listening.

"You'll always be my best friend, you idiot. That's a dumb question." Naruto smiled. He pulled his hand out of his pocket and thrust something at Sasuke that glittered in the sun. Questioningly, Sasuke took it and held it in the palm of his hand. "What's this for?" Sasuke asked with a sneer.

"Just hold onto it, okay? It's magic."

"Magic?" Sasuke asked disbelieving. Naruto blushed and looked away.

"The lady that gave it to me said that whoever I give it to will always remember me when they look at it. I thought it wasn't very good magic at the time, but now I'm kind of glad that it does that. Will you keep it?" Naruto asked. He was trying to look tough, like he didn't care what Sasuke did with the ring, but his blue eyes told a different story. Sasuke met Naruto's gaze and smirked. He closed his hand around the ring and slipped it into his pocket.

"Yeah, I'll keep it."

"I gotta go," Naruto said, once again cheery and bright. Sasuke nodded.

"I'll see you later," Sasuke said. Naruto nodded and extended his fist. Sasuke lightly punched it with his own pale one.

"Yeah," Naruto said with a small smile, "See you later, Sasuke."

With that, Naruto turned and left, waving over his shoulder as he walked through the gates. From the branches of a nearby tree, Kakashi wished him luck.

"I'll be waiting for those letters, Iruka, so don't disappoint me," he whispered, imagining that the cold breeze would carry the words to Iruka's ears. Perhaps they did. Just before they left, Kakashi swore that Iruka turned and looked straight at him. It was not over yet. One day, Iruka would come back. Kakashi would use the time to figure out what had gone wrong, and he'd be better prepared next time. It was the only thing he could do.

Already, he felt like he'd learned one of love's lessons. Goodbyes were never easy.

* * *

**A/N:** Yes, there is a sequel. It's not over yet. In fact, you still have more reading to do right now! Go to my author page and click on the link to my livejournal. There you'll find a mini-arc set between the arc you just read and the sequel, _'New Promises.'_ The mini-arc is called _'Letters,'_ and it's in four installments. Start with 'Letters of Fall' – you'll have to scroll down the page a bit to find it. You can only read it at my livejournal, because it's in a format that this site doesn't support. Once I've posted the last chapter of _'Letters,'_ I'll begin posting _'New Promises'_ on my LJ. When it's complete, I'll post it here just like I've done with _'Fighting Dreamers.'_ You can either read it on my livejournal as it's written, or wait for it to be posted here a chapter a day. Thanks everyone, and I hope you enjoyed reading the first arc! I loved hearing your reviews, and a bit thank you to everyone who commented.

**Responses to Reviews:**

1. Will there be a time skip soon, where Sasuke and Naruto are thirteen or twelve? - Liz

Yes, there will be several time skips. The first is between _'Fighting Dreamers'_ and _'New Promises.'_ Naruto is eight at the end of _'Fighting Dreamers,'_ and turns nine the month after he leaves. When he returns to Konoha in _'New Promises,'_ it will almost be time for his eleventh birthday. Sasuke is one year older than Naruto, so he'll be turning twelve at the beginning of _'New Promises.'_ Beyond _'New Promises,'_ there has been a request for an arc featuring Sasuke and Naruto when they're adults. I'm still considering this.

2. Michiru's Mirror mentioned in her review about the behavior of real men like Mizuki – manipulators and abusers. The truth is that people that survive relationships like that don't heal immediately, and they can't rush right into a healthy relationship. I wanted to show just how influential such people can be – even if it's been years, like in Iruka's case. Tsubaki will have a hard time of it still, though. Thanks especially for this review. It made me really glad that I conveyed what I was trying to with Mizuki and Iruka's relationship.

3. Awyr expressed concern about Kakashi giving in to Iruka's sexual demands. She believes it made him weak-willed. I agree. If Kakashi hadn't given in, and refused to let Iruka use him as a rebound, things might have ended very differently, and that's one of the things Kakashi will come to regret. Unfortunately, Kakashi doesn't know much about love or relationships, and it's all very new to him. I wanted to show that while his heart is in the right place, he's lacking maturity and the wisdom that only comes from experience.

4. Oro-sama felt Iruka lacked empathy where Kakashi was concerned, and that he was too sensitive. This is also true. Iruka and Kakashi have very different mentalities towards relationships, and Iruka can't understand Kakashi's point of view, just like Kakashi struggles to understand his. Kakashi is experiencing love for the first time, and Iruka is jaded about a love that's dying. Iruka is sensitive, but I think that realistically, we'd all be hurt if someone said the things to us that Kakashi says to Iruka. Factor in all the other things in Iruka's life that are upsetting emotionally, and it is no surprise that the slightest insult really tears him down.

5. Necrophile wants to know how it's all going to end. Some may consider this a spoiler, but this story will end happily. It might take another 200 something pages to get there, but it WILL end happily.

6. Nine-Tailed-Vixen was curious about the future of Sasuke and Naruto. Since these two aren't the main characters, I don't think I'm going to give you any guarantees! You'll just have to read to find out how their relationship develops.

7. Kirallie asked a LONG time ago why Iruka was shipped up north to an orphanage. Since I don't really answer this question specifically, I wanted to do so now. Iruka wasn't trained to be a ninja. His parents wanted him to be something less dangerous. Mizuki did have ninja training, but he didn't graduate before the fox demon killed everyone. Because Mizuki's parents weren't anything special, and he didn't have any bloodline limits or special attacks, it was cheaper for the village to send him to an orphanage. The same goes for Iruka. Sasuke's situation is different. He inherited a great deal of wealth when his parents died, and it's in Konoha's best interests to continue his ninja training because of the greatness of his clan.


	15. Letters

**A/N:** This is a mini-series set between my story, "Fighting Dreamers," and it's sequel, "New Promises." It is a collection of letters written by Iruka, Tsubaki, and Naruto, along with journal entries from Kakashi and Sasuke. To see these letters as images, you can visit my livejournal—the link is on my author page. Thanks, and enjoy!

* * *

**Letters**

**(Sticky Note)**

Kakashi –

I'm sorry to do this to you, but do you think you could keep these things for Naruto and myself? We have to pack light, but I can't bear to throw them away.

Iruka

**(Letter)**

_Hatake Kakashi  
__Apartment #36  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Kakashi,

I don't know that you'll want to talk to me tomorrow, so I'm leaving you this letter. When we last spoke, I feel like I was unnecessarily cruel to you. I can't say I wasn't being honest, but my feelings for you aren't as shallow as I made you believe. I do care about you, sweetheart, and I hope…well…I hope you find happiness. You were right when you said I needed time. I've spent my whole life burying my grief and sadness so that I can just get through the day. Now it's my time to heal.

Kakashi, I have to say this, even though I don't want to. Please don't wait for me. If life presents you with a chance to move on, grip it with both hands and go with it. I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but part of why I can't be with you is that you have a lot of growing to do. I think if you're really honest with yourself, you'll see that I'm telling you the truth. You've had to grow up too fast, and that fact didn't do you any favors in the relationship department. But I guess you probably don't want to hear this. It's not like I was perfect and am in a position to judge. God only knows I've done my fair share of messing up.

There's so much more I want to say, but I wouldn't be able to find the words even if sat here until the ink dried up in my pen. Just…be safe and take care of yourself.

Iruka

**(Letter) **

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
__174 Lazy Lane  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki,

We've reached the hot springs and found Jiraiya-san. That's the name of Naruto's new teacher. All I have to say about him is that he's a shameless, horrid, crotchety old pervert. I don't care how great of a ninja he claims to be. I'm spending all my time trying to counter-balance the negative influence he's having on Naruto.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. We spent the most relaxing few days of my life here before we found Jiraiya. Tsubaki, you just have to come and experience it for yourself. The springs are so relaxing. I'm sure you've been thinking about what happened in the woods, non-stop if you're like me. When I was in the springs, I found some relief. You can't do anything beyond just relaxing. I felt so much better afterwards. It was like the stress just melted away.

Naturally, Jiraiya had to come along and wreck it. He's terribly hard on Naruto, but my son takes it like a soldier. I'm proud of him. Jiraiya tells me he has a great deal of potential. Of course, I already knew that.

I think about you often. I hope the pregnancy is going well and you're feeling fine. Remember, even if I can't read your letters yet, I still want you to write me. I think it will help. Writing has certainly been helping me sort through what I'm feeling. I've never had this much time to just think and figure myself out. Naruto and Jiraiya keep themselves busy, and most of the time I'm just waiting in the village for them to finish. Although I have regrets, I still think I made the right decision to leave. I really needed this, and I can't express in words how badly. I almost feel like a person again.

Naruto's tenth birthday is coming up. I can hardly believe it. Since I found him on the tenth of October, that's always been the day we celebrate. I'm going to do something special for him, but I haven't figured out just what yet.

Love,

Iruka 

October 3rd

**(Letter)**

_Uchiha Sasuke  
__Uchiha Complex  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Deer Sasuke,

Dad says I'm gonna have to work on my righting. I showed him one letter, and I just got a huge lecture 'cause I didn't spell anything the right way. Now I'm not showin' him, cause I don't want him making me do it all over agin. You don't care that I don't spell good, right?

I'm learnin' lots of stuff. I'm so gonna kick your butt!

Naruto

October 3rd

**(Letter - Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

The hot springs sound heavenly. As I usually do when I fall onto hard times, I find happiness in my garden. I'm doing a bit of experimenting, and the extra work is keeping me busy. I seem to get tired so easily, though! I've gone to a few checkups at the hospital, and my doctor says I'm doing fine. I was so relieved. I was worried that the stress of losing Mizuki would be bad for me, but I've been trying to take care of myself. Some days it's not easy. I know you know what I'm talking about.

I visit Mizuki's grave often, but not for the reason people think. I visit because I like to stare at the stone and know that he can't hurt me anymore. Is that wrong? I don't know, and I'm beyond caring. I cleaned out his apartment yesterday. It was like realizing that he was dead all over again. I cried and cried until I just couldn't anymore. I hate that it came to this. My only solace is that I know you were with him when he passed, and that you showed him kindness. The rest of the world may never understand why I loved him, but I did with all my heart. It hurts me so much to think of him suffering before…

Enough about that. Even I'm getting tired of thinking about it incessantly. Everyone looks at me with such pity now. I can hardly stand it. These stupid people don't know anything, and they're still gossiping about you and Naruto. They say he has a demon inside of him. It may or may not be true, but I know Naruto would never hurt a fly. The rumors about you are harder to hear. They say such horrible things—as if you aren't a person with feelings just like them. I don't know how they can hate something so much that has nothing to do with them. I'm glad Naruto isn't here to listen to all of this. Trust me, you made the right decision to leave.

Please give Naruto a big Birthday Hug for me. What did you end up doing for him?

You're in my thoughts as well,

Tsubaki October 11th 

**(Letter – Unsent)**

_Hatake Kakashi_  
_Apartment #36_  
_Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Kakashi,

I miss you. I didn't expect that. What are you doing right now? 

**(Letter)**

_Hatake Kakashi_  
_Apartment #36  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Kakashi,

Naruto's training is going well. Jiraiya-sama is working on his basics and tells me that he'll be ready for more advanced techniques soon. They did this exercise where Naruto had to walk on water. He kept falling in. I guess you just had to be there to appreciate how funny it was. Naruto will be ten years old in five days. It's hard for me to believe!

I hope you're doing well. I'm doing okay.

Iruka 

October 5th

**(Sasuke's Journal Entry)**

Dear Journal,

I think writing in here is stupid. Kakashi says I have to do it, though, and he even bought me the journal. I don't have much to say. Unlike Naruto, I'm still stuck in boring old Konoha with all the stupid girls that won't leave me alone. It's bad again, because I'm all by myself now that Naruto's gone.

I got a letter from the Idiot today. His writing is pathetic. I don't know why I spent so much time with someone so dense. I kept the letter. I don't know why.

Sasuke  
October 6th

**(Letter)**

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
__174 Lazy Lane  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki,

Naruto had a good time on his birthday. I bought him some new clothing and a watch. He already broke it once, but I managed to get it running again. Now he only wears it when he's not training. Jiraiya, that stupid idiot, gave Naruto a pornographic novel for a present.

I swear, Tsubaki, this training might get cut real short. I'm going to strangle the lazy pervert in his sleep.

I've tried to stay focused on Naruto's birthday, but I haven't forgotten who else had a birthday this month. Will you put some flowers on Mizuki's grave for me on the 21st? I know it's asking a lot, but I don't want him to be alone, despite everything he did. He always loved his birthdays. It was always an event when we were younger. I miss those days.

We've left the springs, unfortunately. I don't think it was planned. I suspect it's because the bathhouse owner caught Jiraiya spying on women. I told you—he's horrible. We're headed to one more town in Fire Country before we leave the border. Jiraiya says he has a friend he wants to track down.

Speaking of friends, how is Kakashi doing? I know it's silly to ask, as your letters can't reach me, but I just have to. I'm worrying about him more than I thought I would. I'm starting to fear…well, I'm not quite ready to go there yet. Maybe in another letter.

All My Love to You and Baby, Iruka October 20th (Letter – Unsent) Iruka, Curse you for leaving your stupid shit here. I can't put it away. It's just sitting there wasting space in my damn bedroom. You had no right to leave a letter like that. It didn't even make sense, and no, I didn't want to hear your opinion about why you don't care about me. I could have done without the salt in the wound, thanks. Tsubaki showed me your letters to her. Well, she didn't show me so much as I visited her and happened to find them on the table and accidentally read them. Then she explained how she's writing you even though you won't read her letters until you get back. Just what are you starting to fear concerning me? Worried that I'm still going to be hung up on you when you come back? Think again. And quit talking about me to Tsubaki. You don't like being called a woman, so don't gossip like one. Gossip. I swear I'm going to lose it and just start killing people. Kurenai is first on the list for the irritating habit she's developed of telling me at every opportunity what everyone's saying about us and Naruto. Next is going to be Tenzo, because he's been following me like a lost puppy for no apparent reason. But there's no point in telling you all that. It's not like you'll ever read this. Get out of my head, already! Sick of hearing about you, Kakashi P.S. I'm taking care of Sasuke. At least I'm trying. 

**(Sasuke's Journal)**

Dear Journal,

No word from the retard. I wonder what he's doing. Kakashi won't leave me alone. He doesn't know the first thing about taking care of a kid. Most of the time, I feel like I'm taking care of him. When I was at his apartment yesterday, he showed me a letter he wrote to Iruka. When I say 'showed' I mean that I happened to find it when I searched his bedroom. Then I accidentally read it while he was on a mission.

Something bad happened between those two. I guess it's up to me to sort it all out. I tried to find the letter he mentioned that Iruka wrote to him, but I couldn't. He's probably framed it, the stupid loser.

Sakura framed some of my hair. She cut it off during class while Ino used her Mind Transfer jutsu on me. What's WRONG with these people?

Naruto would never do something stupid like that. Now I have to worry about this Kakashi-Iruka thing and figure out a way to get my hair back from Sakura. I hate girls.

Sasuke  
October 21st

**(Letter)**

_Uchiha Sasuke  
__Uchiha Complex  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Sasuke,

Dad made me write this letter better than I wrote the last one. Everything's spelled right and everything! I'm learning a new technique. What's Kakashi teaching you? Anything good? My teacher is named Frog Hermit. He knows good stuff, even if he has a dumb name that I can't spell.

I wish we could spar and eat ramen. When I get back, let's eat a bunch of ramen together, okay? We had to leave the last town cause Frog Hermit got caught staring at naked girls. Wait till you see what I came up with to keep Frog Hermit in line! Dad hasn't seen it yet, but since I don't change into Kakashi, I don't know if it would work or not. I saw a girl's boobs. Have you seen them yet? I bet you haven't. Loser.

Naruto

November 2nd

**(Letter – Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

It's been more than a month, and you still are gone. I guess I knew it would take longer than just a few weeks, but I was hoping you'd be home soon. I feel very alone, and I feel like you're the only one who understands how I'm feeling.

Still, I know you're safer and better off wherever you are. The gossip about you has finally died down. I have to tell you something. Kakashi-san came to visit me and found your letters.

I wish I could tell you he's doing well, but I really can't tell. He hardly ever speaks. I haven't seen him without Sasuke-kun with him, so that's something at least. I cooked for him the other day and took it to his house. He was gone, but Sasuke was there. He's turning into such a young gentleman! It seems he grows taller every time I see him. I think Sasuke is living with Kakashi now, but he still returns home to check for Naruto's letters. There was another man there when I visited. His name was Tenzo. He was polite, but I didn't like him. He moved around the apartment as if it were his own.

I don't quite know how to tell you this, and it may not have any significance at all. The last time I saw Sasuke, he was wearing your mother's ring on a chain around his neck. Did Naruto give it to him, I wonder?

I'm beginning to gain a little weight. I feel fat, and now people pity me even more when they realize I'm pregnant with a dead man's baby. A trip to the hot springs is starting to sound like a wonderful idea.

Feel free to talk about Kakashi. Could it be you cared for him more than you thought? No one would blame you for being confused. It wasn't exactly an easy time for any of us.

Fat and Tired,

Tsubaki  
November 3rd

**(Letter)**

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
174 Lazy Lane  
Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki,

How's Baby? I feel like mine has grown up overnight. There was a festival in the village we're staying in, and he stayed out late because we got separated in the crowd. When he came back he said Jiraiya had let him taste alcohol. Naturally, I lost it. But for once I was patient. I knew I couldn't beat or strangle the man, so I waited until he returned that night—so drunk he didn't even know his own name.

I shaved him bald while he slept. Keep in mind that this is a man that used to have hair down to his waist. Needless to say, he hasn't teased me or taught something perverted to Naruto since, and he's using a jutsu to keep the image of his hair. Naruto knows he's bald though, and he takes great pleasure in telling all the pretty girls we meet that Jiraiya is so old he's gone bald and that he wears a wig. Serves the big toad right. Tsubaki, you don't know how much that man gets on my nerves. Raising a child is hard enough without Jiraiya trying to corrupt my son at every opportunity.

I've discovered something else about him. He's the author of those perverted books Kakashi was always reading. The other day, he called me a prude and said I was too virginal to handle his writing. That night I took his latest book and edited it. I left detailed notes in the margins explaining why most of the sex positions he chose were impossible and made suggestions for new ones. He hasn't looked at me in the same way since.

Maybe Kakashi will forgive me if I send him a copy of Jiraiya's latest book before anyone else gets it? I think about him all the time. I miss him terribly. Has he found someone new?

Missing Konoha,

Iruka  
November 17th

**(Letter)**

_Hatake Kakashi_  
_Apartment #36  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Kakashi,

I have a surprise for you, but you'll have to wait until I come back to Konoha. It concerns a new job I've found. I have to occupy myself somehow while Naruto and Jiraiya are off training, after all. How have you been? Naruto is excited to show you everything he's learned. How is Sasuke-kun?

Jiraiya has a good friend in the next town we're visiting, and we'll be staying with him for most of December. I'll give you his address just in case anyone in Konoha would like to write to us. We should be there long enough to receive letters. We've wandered quite far from Konoha, and the weather is freezing where I am. Since it really snows in this country, most of the villages have big winter festivals. I remember my parents celebrating the end of winter vaguely, but it's been a long time since I went to a Konoha festival. I hope you relax some and enjoy the cool weather.

Kakashi…have you forgiven me yet? I've had a lot of time to think about what I really want, and…well…never mind. It's late and it's been a long day. Forgive me if I don't make any sense. In case our card doesn't reach you in time, I send warm wishes to you for the winter holidays. If I were there, I'd make you some gingerbread and decorate for you. Please visit Tsubaki during the holidays. It's going to be hard on her. If you don't have to work, take Sasuke to the festival. I bet he'd have a good time.

Hoping you're safe and sound,

Iruka  
December 12th

P.S. – Here's the address:

672 Mountain Pass  
Yukigakure, Snow Country

**(Letter)**

_Uchiha Sasuke  
__Uchiha Complex  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Sasuke,

Happy Holidays! Are you going to the winter festival in Konoha? Dad says they put on a fireworks show. Wish I could see it with you! Man, a hot bowl of ramen would taste great right now. It's been snowing all the time, but Frog Hermit still makes me train, stupid bastard.

Don't tell my dad I called him that, okay?

- Naruto

December 12th

**(Letter)**

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
__174 Lazy Lane  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki-san,

Is your baby out yet? I can't wait to see him when we get home! Don't get too cold during winter. It's snows all the time here, but I'm still training. I'm definitely going to be Hokage now! Dad says I've grown taller, but I can't tell. Hey, hey, when I get back will you cook for me again and let me play in your garden? That would be really fun.

Happy Holidays!

Naruto  
December 12th

**(Letter)**

_Umino Iruka  
__672 Mountain Pass  
__Yukigakure, Snow Country_

Dear Iruka,

I'm so glad this letter will reach you. I'm afraid I have some horrible news. Kakashi was badly injured on a mission last week. He's been in the hospital ever since, and the doctors say he'll probably be there for the rest of the month. I visit him almost every day, along with Sasuke and Tenzo-san. Tenzo-san is the young man that Kakashi has befriended. I think they work together. I know you'll be worried, but the doctors say he will recover just fine. It's just going to take time.

I've been faithfully replying to each and every letter, and saving my replies for you to read. Sasuke tells me that Kakashi has written you a letter, too. When I asked him if he would like me to send it with this one, he told me Kakashi probably wouldn't want it to be mailed. Perhaps he still has feelings for you, too? Sasuke has been so grown-up about the whole thing. He's had a huge growth spurt.

I'm almost four months pregnant now. Can you believe it? The time sure flies by. Before the mission, Kakashi and Sasuke-kun were building me a crib. Lately, I've been craving ramen all the time. I'm starting to believe I'm carrying a twin of Naruto-kun! Stay safe, and have a lovely winter holiday.

Love,

Tsubaki  
December 19th

P.S. Has Jiraiya-san's hair re-grown yet? I bet his head is cold in all that snow. Oh, and congratulations on your new editing job. I haven't told Kakashi, so your surprise is safe!

**(Letter)**

_Umino Naruto  
__672 Mountain Pass  
__Yukigakure, Snow Country_

Dear Naruto,

My training was going well, but Kakashi landed himself in the hospital, so now Tenzo's teaching me a few things. When you get home, you'll have to think of a prank to play on him. Tenzo's an idiot, and he deserves whatever we can dish out. I still have the ring, and it still works. I haven't forgotten you yet. I hope you come home soon.

Sasuke  
December 19

**(Letter)**

_Hatake Kakashi_  
_Apartment #36  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Kakashi,

Are you recovering well? I've been worried sick about you, even though Tsubaki said you'd be fine. I was so relieved to hear that you're taking care of Sasuke-kun, too. I wish I could help you out while you're injured, but I guess Tenzo-san is doing the job.

I'm really happy that you've found a new friend. Really, really happy. I mean, that's just great news. Really.

Rest up, Kakashi. I miss you…and Sasuke and Tsubaki, too, of course.

Worried about you,

Iruka  
December 26th

**(Sasuke's Journal Entry)**

Dear Journal,

Kakashi nearly died on his last mission. Tenzo has been driving him crazy in the hospital. He acts like Sakura and Ino. I get irritated with Tenzo. He thinks he can boss me around like he's my big brother or something. If he keeps doing it, I'm going to hurt him. Seriously. And Kakashi can't do anything about it because he's stuck in a hospital bed.

Naruto's letters are getting further and further apart. I don't understand why he can't train in Konoha. When I mentioned Naruto the other day, Tenzo asked me if I had a crush on him. I tried to hit him, but I couldn't. Stupid ANBU asshole. I need to get stronger.

I don't think he and Kakashi are together, but I've been talking about Iruka a lot lately just to make sure it doesn't happen. Kakashi usually gets really quiet when he's mentioned, and then he tells Tenzo to leave him alone. They think I don't know what's going on, but I'm not stupid.

Sasuke  
December 26th

P.S. Tenzo doesn't know anything. Naruto's just my best friend.

**(Letter)**

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
__174 Lazy Lane  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki,

How are you feeling? I'm sorry this letter is so late. We left Yukigakure and we camped out for almost three weeks in the mountains. Then we left Snow Country and traveled to Honey Country. Don't be fooled by the name. After freezing solid for nearly a month, Honey Country sounded like it would be warm and heavenly. It's just as cold as Snow Country—maybe even colder. The honey, however, was just as delicious as it sounds. I'm saving you a small bottle.

I miss winters in Fire Country where things stay warm. Once I get home, I'm never leaving. The traveling is good for Naruto, though. He's sparring with ninjas from all different places, and he's making lots of new friends all over the world. He's pretty good about writing them all letters, too. We've had so many adventures. When we finally get home, you and I will have to curl up with something hot to drink and I'll tell you all about it. I've started a diary so I don't forget anything. I'm thinking about writing a book. Goodness knows enough has happened to us to fill hundreds of pages.

We encountered a Konoha ninja for the first time last week. He said he didn't know Kakashi personally, but that (like everyone) he's heard of his reputation. He'd heard of ours, too, and was rude to us at first. We helped him with his mission, though, and he eventually realized we aren't terrible people. He sparred with Naruto and said he's going to tell all his friends that Naruto is going to be Hokage some day. I guess his strength really has become impressive. I don't even notice. To me, he's still my little boy. I guess things have changed a bit. I don't have to help him as much, and instead of protecting him, he usually ends up protecting me. He's getting to be so handsome, Tsubaki.

Hoping you're well,

Iruka  
February 3rd

**(Letter)**

_Uchiha Sasuke  
__Uchiha Complex  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Sasuke,

I'm sorry I haven't written a letter just for you. I've been telling Naruto to give you messages from me in his letters, but he let it slip the other day that he hasn't been including what I say because it's "stuff you already know." He got in big trouble, just so you know.

Tsubaki says Kakashi is taking care of you, and that makes me glad. I didn't want you to go back to being alone. I worry about how you're doing. You know you're like my second son, so I miss you very much! How is school? Are you keeping your grades up and trying hard? Tsubaki told me about the crib you were building for her. That was a very kind thing to do, Sasuke-kun. Naruto talks about you to all of the new people he meets. If you were worried he might have forgotten about you, that's definitely not the case! He and I look at the stars at night and try to guess which ones you might be seeing in Konoha. We both can't wait to see you again. Naruto wants you to tell him stories again when we get back. He says you're still better at it than I am. I love you, and I hope you're taking care of yourself.

All my love,

Iruka  
February 6

**(Sasuke's Journal Entry)**

Dear Journal,

Iruka is definitely better for Kakashi than Tenzo. I figured out that they are a couple, so I talked to Kakashi about it. I asked him if he'd forgotten about Iruka. He told me that if I didn't like his choices, I could move back home. So I did.

Tenzo came to talk to me. He said that he cared about me a lot and didn't want "his little brother" to be upset. I told him to fuck off, and that I only have one older brother, and Tenzo definitely isn't him. He left after that, and I haven't heard from either Kakashi or Tenzo for a few days. Good riddance. Iruka deserves better than that lazy ass anyway. Iruka said he loved me in his letter. I haven't heard that in a long time. It made me feel better about everything. I miss Iruka, too, but I miss Naruto even more. I want my best friend back. Tenzo may be stupid, but I think he might have been right. I like Naruto. I'm never going to tell him, though. He probably wouldn't want to be my best friend anymore if he knew.

Sasuke  
February 13

P.S. Valentine's Day is coming up. I hate Valentine's Day. Naruto would have liked eating all the chocolate I always get, though. Too bad he's not here.

**(Kakashi's Journal Entry)**

I realize now what you were talking about, Iruka. I was fucking Tenzo, and sometimes he said and did the stupidest things. He's only 19. What's scary is I realized that I don't act much better than he does, despite the fact that I'm almost 26. Is it too late to say I'm sorry? I will say it to you when you get back, no matter how awkward it is.

I've made a mess of things with Sasuke. I need you here to help him. He's a smart kid and he picks up on too damn much. I can't talk to him like you do. He respects me, but he doesn't open up to me. I bought him a journal, but I don't know if he's actually writing in it or not. I'm going to try to sort things out with Sasuke. Please come home soon. I've learned my lesson. Trying to take care of a kid is harder than I thought. Doing that, and then being in a relationship with a child in an adult's body would wear anybody down.

Tenzo got angry with me and threw away your things – I hadn't touched them. I nearly strangled him, but I ended up dumping him instead. He's young. He'll find somebody else. I'm quitting ANBU. Sasuke got really upset when I came back like I did. He didn't say it, but I could tell by the way he spent all his time in the hospital with me to make sure I kept breathing through the rough patches. I've had a long run in ANBU, but I feel like I have someone to come back home for now. I actually care if I live or die, and you can't be like that as ANBU Captain. Did you know I would start to care about Sasuke as much as I do? I bet you did. It seemed like you knew me better than I knew myself sometimes. I hope I can convince Sasuke to come back home. I wish you were here to help me. He'd listen to you.

**(Letter—Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

How quickly things can turn from good to bad. Things have gotten a bit messy here. I'm at the six-month mark, and you don't know how much I wish you were here. Kakashi recovered and came out of the hospital, and now I know exactly what happened between him and Tenzo. I heard the story from Sasuke, who was very upset and came to me to talk about it (though he pretended he came just to finish the crib). I've watched as Sasuke and Kakashi trained together almost every day, frequently by my house so that they could stop for drinks and lunch when they got hungry. The two of them are so alike – they just understand each other. Five months of this and they were acting like father and son. Sasuke even slipped once and called him "dad." Kakashi had a big smile on his face that whole morning, and Sasuke blushed afterwards, but he said it again a few more times in my presence. The two of them have been doing well, Iruka, really wonderfully.

I haven't written about Tenzo to spare your feelings, because I know you still care (love?) Kakashi. But Tenzo is the one who made Sasuke and Kakashi become so close by constantly encouraging both of them and communicating between them. Tenzo isn't perfect, but he loves Sasuke. After you left, everyone knew about Kakashi's preference, and maybe that gave Tenzo the courage to approach him. Maybe it just made him curious. At any rate, he started following Kakashi around and distracted him from your leaving. At first I didn't like how familiar he acted with Kakashi – like they were intimate before they really were. He instantly liked Sasuke. Tenzo was constantly teasing him and playing with him, even sneaking him into scary movies every so often. For a while, I honestly thought the three of them might become a family. Then problems started. Tenzo took his brotherly attitude a bit too far, and with Sasuke's history, it became a sensitive subject. The two of them began to fight. Tenzo didn't understand why Sasuke was suddenly shutting him out. Sasuke tells me it was when he found out Tenzo and Kakashi were sleeping together. Sasuke wants you to come back and be with Kakashi. He has it in his head that you're his other father, and he doesn't like Tenzo trying to fill your shoes.

Tenzo has been talking to me, as well. I know you won't judge him just because of your past with Kakashi. You aren't like that. If he made Kakashi happy, I know you'd be the first one to welcome him into our circle of friends, but he and Kakashi are constantly butting heads. Tenzo wants Kakashi to take him seriously, but Kakashi thinks of him as a kid still. It's not that Tenzo's immature. It's just that he hasn't had a relationship before. He doesn't know when to pick his fights, and I can tell he irritates Kakashi to no end. Tenzo doesn't realize this, but Kakashi is used to the kind of attention you gave him. Tenzo is young and self-centered, and sometimes he doesn't realize he's saying something that hurts Kakashi's feelings. He's just not as sensitive and caring as you are. Things finally reached a boiling point and it ended in the worst possible way. Sasuke had a melt down and called Kakashi all kinds of terrible things. He told him he didn't deserve you, and that he must not have really loved you if he'd already forgotten about you. He told Kakashi he was childish and stupid and that he never wanted to see Tenzo again. Kakashi lost his temper and told him if he didn't like it, he could move back home. Tenzo was angry that Sasuke chose you over him (he's terribly jealous of you, Iruka) and he and Sasuke got into it after Kakashi stormed out. Sasuke moved home for a few days and then came to see me. Tenzo tried to apologize to him, but Sasuke won't hear it. I've asked Sasuke to stay with me for a few days, and I'm helping him sort out his feelings. I think it helped that Kakashi came by and told him he and Tenzo were done. Sasuke's willing to forgive Kakashi, but he's still angry with Tenzo. Tenzo said something to him that he won't repeat even to me.

It's a mess, Iruka. I guess it would make things worse if you were here in the middle of it, but it would certainly make me feel better. My back has been killing me, and I'm starting to lose my courage. I just keep thinking of how Sasuke yelled at Kakashi, and I wonder if my child and I will ever have fights like that. What if I'm not a good mom? I'm still young, and the whole experience with Mizuki has taught me that sometimes I can be so stupid. I'm scared, Iruka, and I miss you terribly.

Love,

Tsubaki  
February 28th

**(Letter)**

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
__174 Lazy Lane  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki,

Finally, we've found some warm weather! We're moving in the direction of Konoha again, so it could be a sign Naruto's training is almost done. Jiraiya won't tell me anything substantial. He always says it just depends. I think he's waiting for Naruto to plateau. That's a scary thought. We'll be traveling for years if that's the case! Naruto has become ridiculously strong. We've had some nasty scrapes, because we're in unfriendly territory. Naruto just blows the enemies away in battle. I was worried Naruto was using the demon's chakra, but Jiraiya assures me it's sealed completely. Naruto's strength is all his own, and I can tell it amazes Jiraiya. Naruto works hard, and he never gives up.

I might have to admit that Jiraiya is a good teacher for him. His books aren't half bad either. We sent off his newest one to the publisher and he raved about it. He said Jiraiya's not allowed to ever fire me as his editor. Jiraiya's publisher said I improved Jiraiya's writing so much that he wants to partner me up with some of his other authors once I'm back in Konoha. I couldn't be happier about it. I haven't had time to work on my own book. I think I'm going to write a travel guide. Life has been precarious, to say the least. Naruto and Jiraiya are trouble magnets, and even more so lately. It seems every time I turn around we're in some kind of predicament.

I will say this about Earth Country. The people might be hostile, but sometimes we'll be walking along in the mountains and we'll come across a meadow or a waterfall that just takes your breath away. I invested in a small camera (it was expensive – ridiculously so) and I'll be sending you some pictures once I get them developed. Spring is like a living, breathing beauty in this place. It rolls down through the mountains and breathes through the water, melting the ice. The transformation is a marvel to watch. This place brings out the poet in me!

I bet your tummy is getting very big by this point. Maybe we'll be back in time for me to throw you a baby shower. Jiraiya has finally gotten the story out of me about Kakashi and myself, and about my unsavory past. God help me, but he wants to turn it into a special edition of his series. I'm telling him no, but he's going to do it anyway.

Love,

Iruka  
March 1

P.S. I'm trying not to think about Kakashi so much since you told me he's getting close with someone else. It's been hard, but life has kept me distracted. I think I'm almost to the point that I could meet his new lover and not feel jealous. Then again, maybe I'm being too optimistic.

**(Letter)**

_Uchiha Sasuke  
__Uchiha Complex  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Sasuke,

I've had so many awesome battles! A rich lady paid me a ton of money because I found her daughter. She had got lost in the mountains. Jiraiya-sensei had given me the day off, so I told her I'd find her. She was really worried and didn't want to waste time going all the way to Iwagakure to hire a ninja. I tracked Junna-chan down easy, but she'd been kidnapped by a Stone ninja named Masami who'd gone rogue. He was tough! We fought for hours and I even fell off the side of the mountain! Dad found out where I'd gone and then he found Jiraiya. They came and Jiraiya helped me finish him off, but I coulda' handled it without him. Guess what? Masami was a Chuunin! I held my own against a Chuunin! Awesome, huh?

Then guess what happened. Just guess. Junna-chan gave me a kiss! It was only on the cheek, but she wants me to write to her and come see her again. Sakura-chan was cute, but Junna-chan is already a teenager. She's blonde and has huge boobs. Jiraiya-sensei says if she'd been older, he would have put her in one of his perverted books – that's how pretty she was! Have you been kissed yet, Sasuke? You better not be kissing on Sakura-chan. Even if Junna-chan's prettier, I still have dibs on Sakura!

Naruto  
March 1

**(Sasuke's Journal Entry)**

Dear Journal,

Naruto is stupid. I definitely don't like him, and I probably won't even hang out with him when he gets back. All he cares about is boobs, and I don't have any, so I guess he won't like me anymore. I bet he gave a ring to that bimbo Junna, too. What kind of girl goes around kissing just anyone? She's probably just as annoying as Sakura and Ino. I should kiss him on the lips like in that movie Tenzo and I saw yesterday, just to show him how good of a kisser I am – way better than him. Well, I would do that if I still liked him, but I don't so it doesn't matter.

Kakashi and I are okay now. I'm letting Tenzo talk to me again, but I don't talk to him much. I try not to encourage him. I did tell him about my brother. Now he says he won't be my big brother – he's going to be my uncle instead. An uncle is okay, I guess. I don't really care. I'm just so pissed about Naruto and his stupid bimbo. I hope Jiraiya-sama beats the crap out of him during training.

Sasuke  
March 5

**(Letter-Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

Things have sorted themselves out here, but it's still stressful. I wish I could be in the mountains with you enjoying a picnic. I'm looking forward to your pictures. I've never been out of Konoha. Your travel book sounds like such a good idea. I'd love to read about far off places. Sometimes Konoha gets so boring. Sasuke is working for me now. I pay him to help me in the garden and to cart my vegetables to the market. I'm getting too fat to do anything. Tenzo is helping me out as well. I had a bit of cramping when the three of them were here, and I think they're afraid for me now. Tenzo is a good cook, though, so I'm not telling him that I feel better!

Kakashi and Tenzo have come to some sort of agreement. Maybe it's just an act for Sasuke's sake, but if it is, Sasuke hasn't picked up on it. Who knows? Maybe they're back together again and they're just keeping it a secret. I've given up on trying to make sense out of those two. I hope you're finding some spring romance of your own. Men haven't looked twice at me since my belly ballooned, but Tenzo is a darling and always makes a big show of complimenting me around other people and taking me to lunch when he's not working. White Day is coming up, and I have three handsome men to expect chocolate from! I made chocolates for them on Valentines, so I'm expecting them to return the favor! My cravings for all things sweet lately have just been ridiculous. The ice cream vendor can tell what flavor I want by the expression on my face. That's how bad it's gotten.

Sasuke was not happy to read Naruto's last letter. Iruka, I may sound silly, but I think Sasuke has a crush on Naruto. He protects that ring with his life, and he was so moody after he read about Naruto getting his first kiss from a girl. Kakashi, Tenzo, and I all picked up on it. Kakashi thinks the situation is hilarious and called Sasuke "cute." That didn't go over well. Tenzo read Naruto's letter over Sasuke's shoulder and has been teasing him mercilessly. I'm trying to make them be sensitive, but it's a lost cause, I'm afraid.

I met another friend of Kakashi's the other day. She bought some vegetables from me in the market. She and her boyfriend, Asuma, have been working with Kakashi a great deal lately. I invited them all to dinner, and they were lovely company. Kurenai and I are going shopping together tomorrow. I'm excited!

Hoping you'll get home soon,

Tsubaki  
March 8

**(Letter)**

_Uchiha Sasuke  
__Uchiha Complex  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Sasuke,

I really miss you. I don't get homesick like dad does, but everything I've seen and done would have been better if you'd been here, too. I'm writing this at the ramen stand in Takigakure, but my ramen just doesn't taste good. Not because of the chef, but because I just kept thinking of how good the ramen was in Konoha, and I think it was so good because that's where you called me weak for the first time, and that's where we ate after school. I guess I'm just bummed out today. I asked Jiraiya-sensei when I would get to go home, but he says it won't be for a while. I hope you haven't found a new best friend, because you're still mine. I hope the ring still works. Jiraiya-sensei has been trying to teach me a new technique called the Rasengan, but I can't do it. I'm getting sick of training. I just want to hang out with you again. Dad loves the mountains, but it's just dumb flowers and rocks. I want to climb up our tree again and play Missing Ninja in the forest. Oh, yeah, dad says he loves you, can't wait to give you a big hug when we get back, blah blah blah.

Naruto  
March 20

**(Letter, Pictures Included)**

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
__174 Lazy Lane  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki,

I finally got my pictures developed, and it is the neatest thing! I took a few of Naruto, but he moved during the flash and they came out blurry, so I just threw them away. The best pictures are of the landscapes, and those are the ones I'll use in my book. Will you hold onto these for me so that I can save them for my travel guide?

Naruto is getting a bit frustrated. His training is very difficult at the moment, so I'm trying to keep his spirits up. I wish he could get a letter from Sasuke. That would cheer him up. How is Sasuke-kun? How's Kakashi?

I feel a bit guilty, even though I have no reason to feel this way. I have a new lover here. There, I wrote it. Please don't let Kakashi see this letter. I don't want to cause trouble or upset him, even though he's probably moved on. It's really nothing serious, but we've stayed here a few weeks and one thing just led to another, and before I knew it we were sleeping together. Naruto's a little upset about it, but mostly because he doesn't want to share my attention. He's warming up to Takuma and his friends slowly. He asked some questions, but doesn't mind that I'm gay. I'm amazed at how mature he's being about it. I guess we've just stuck by each other too much for him to push me away just because of my sexuality. It feels like a weight off my shoulders.

Takigakure is much more relaxed than Konoha, and I've seen several gay couples walking about in the open. Most of them are friends with Takuma, so I'll have lots of friends to write to when I leave. I almost wish I could live here, tucked away behind a waterfall. Naruto doesn't like it though. He says the ramen tastes bad. Plus, I wouldn't be so mean as to take him away from Sasuke when all he's wanted lately is to be around him.

Takuma took me swimming the other day. We ended up doing…other things. A waterfall was involved. I hope I'm not giving you too many details, but I'm so excited by how romantic he is! Also, I've been reading so much of Jiraiya's porn that I've become desensitized as to what's appropriate to say and what's not. You'll have to forgive me for rambling about him, but Takuma is just…perfect. Tall, dark, and handsome…and he has an accent, too. I'm serious, it's like he walked out of a romance novel. Of course, I don't think things would workout between us long term. He's got a bit of a wandering eye, if you know what I mean. Still, for a spring fling, he's a nice catch! I think I've had a dreamy smile on my face ever since we met.

Much love,

Iruka  
March 26

**(Sasuke's Journal Entry)**

Dear Journal,

Maybe Naruto isn't so bad. I guess I can forgive him. I'm irritated with Kakashi and Tenzo again, though. I came home yesterday and I'm positive they were kissing before I got there. I just pretended like I didn't notice. I don't want them to be together, but I'm starting to feel like Iruka and Naruto are never going to come home, so Kakashi may as well be happy. Tenzo reads the same perverted books Kakashi does, and they laugh about them all the time. Plus, Tenzo's really strong. I think Kakashi likes that he and Tenzo can fight with fists if they get really mad at each other.

I guess this family wouldn't be so bad if I can't have my first choice.

Sasuke  
March 25

**(Letter—Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

I'm so happy for you! I wish you could bring Takuma home with you. I bet he'd make quite the souvenir! I must admit that the real reason I'm glad you've moved on is because Kakashi and Tenzo seem to have fixed whatever was wrong between them. I know it would be hard for you to see that if you still cared for him. Sasuke has accepted it. I admit the whole thing makes me a bit sad. I was hoping you and Kakashi would find that time was all you needed. Then again, if the both of you are happy, then I'm happy, too.

It seems that I'm the only one who hasn't found romance this spring. If I didn't see you still dating, I would think that having this baby was the end of my love life. I think things would be different if Mizuki were still alive, but his death has given me closure. I haven't visited him since his birthday. Sometimes I have to really resist the urge. I want to move past him and live in the present. It's easier to say than do, I'm afraid. Sometimes I think finding new romance will help me forget about the past, but other times I catch a glimpse of the truth inside my heart. I lay awake at night and know that the greatest love of my life is gone. For all his flaws, I was at his mercy. Would I really have had the strength to leave him if he were still alive? Iruka, forgive me, but I don't think I would have. Lately, I've been fixated on all my weaknesses. I just feel so gloomy all the time. I wish I had someone to share this pregnancy with. The baby moved for the first time last week and instead of being happy, I just broke down into tears because I felt so alone. It was so selfish and silly, Iruka. I've been like that all month. I've gained 22 pounds and 16 stretch marks. Even chocolate isn't helping at this point. Come home. I just want someone to hold me, and I'm too embarrassed to ask Kakashi or Tenzo. They'd just look at me as if I'd grown a second head.

Miserably yours,

Tsubaki  
March 31

**(Letter)**

_Hatake Kakashi  
__Apartment #36  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Kakashi,

I hope you're doing well. I don't quite know what to write in these letters. Not knowing what the situation is in Konoha…it drives me crazy sometimes. I worry so much about Tsubaki. You're taking care of her, aren't you? She needs lots of rest and attention. Tsubaki is a lot like me when it comes to getting by. The brighter she's smiling, the more she's hurting inside, so don't assume she's okay just because she keeps up a cheery façade. She probably doesn't want to worry you, but I know she has to be feeling upset. I don't even know what I'm asking you to do exactly, but I just feel helpless where she's concerned. I wish I could be there for her.

Naruto's training has come to a halt. I don't know what's gotten into him lately, but he's been about as pleasant as a crocodile with a sore tooth. He sassed off to Jiraiya, who's now refusing to help him anymore until he changes his attitude. I've tried talking to him, but he insists that I won't understand. I'm not ready for my baby to be a teenager if this is the kind of behavior I have to look forward to. If he weren't so damn strong I'd take him over my knee and spank him. He told me to stay out of his business yesterday. He's ten. I was so surprised I didn't even know what to say. A year and a half ago he was asking for bed time stories and begging to be tickled. Now he's telling me to stay out of his business.

I guess I'm just frustrated. Everything was really wonderful in Takigakure. Now we're in Bean Country and still moving – no end in sight. I'm getting very tired of saying goodbye to friends. I still miss you and think about you daily. I worry about you, too, you know. I hope someone is taking better care of you than I did. You deserve…I guess 'love' is the word I'm fishing for. I'm sorry. I'm not even making sense. I'll just stop now before I have to re-write the whole letter.

Iruka  
April 4

**(Letter)**

_Uchiha Sasuke  
__Uchiha Complex  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Sasuke,

I can't do it. I'm trying really hard, but I just can't make it work. Jiraiya-sensei told me not to worry about it, because it took this other guy years to get Rasengan right, but I can't do it at all. My dad's not a ninja, so he doesn't understand about being weak. He's always good at everything he does, and he never messes up. I don't want to tell him that I can't do it. I bet you could help me if you were here.

Naruto  
April 4

**(Letter—Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

If Naruto's training isn't going well, why are you still traveling? I wish you could just tell Jiraiya to bring you home. Kakashi says the same thing. He says there's no way Naruto can learn that technique, so you're just wasting your time. I don't mean to sound rude, but I could have this baby any day now, and I'm having to face the fact you might not be here to help me. I know I sound desperate and ridiculous, but I'm frightened. I'm beyond frightened. I'm terrified. I never thought you might not be back by now. What if I can't handle the pain? I'm so tired all the time – how will I juggle working and taking care of a newborn at the same time? I was hoping…and I know this might be strange…but I was hoping since we're both single parents…you could come live with me? I'm having another room built onto my house. My uncle is going to pay for it. He agrees that the baby and I will need more space, and you and Naruto could use the room until the baby is older. I know this is selfish of me, but I just can't do it alone. You're my best friend, Iruka, and I don't know who else to ask for help. When I told Kakashi and Tenzo about it, Kakashi thought it would be a good idea. Tenzo's in a snit about it, but I could care less. Tenzo gets on my nerves sometimes, and now is not a good time to get on my nerves. I feel like a bomb just waiting to explode on someone who looks at me wrong.

Love,

Tsubaki  
April 3

**(Letter—Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

It's been weeks since you sent a letter to Kakashi. What has happened? Are you okay? I'm worrying myself sick. I don't know if you're hurt or sick or…I can't even think of that possibility. Kakashi tells me you're with Jiraiya-sama, who wouldn't let anything happen to you, but there are rumors going around the village. They're saying Fire Country might not be peaceful for much longer. Iruka, this is just crazy! I don't want to bring a baby into a world that might go to war soon. The doctor suggested I stay in bed all the time so the baby isn't born too soon. Sasuke has been staying with me to help me. He's such a sweetheart. Kakashi and Tenzo come every day if they aren't on missions to cook for me and help me finish getting ready, and even Kurenai came to visit me yesterday, but I can't talk to them. I want you here desperately. I hope you're safe.

Worried senseless about everything,

Tsubaki  
April 18

**(Letter—Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

Still no word from you. I had a breakdown. Tenzo was here and he said something completely insensitive, like he always does. He said that maybe you wouldn't come back, and he sounded pleased about it. I guess he thought I couldn't hear him. I know he thinks when you come back he's going to lose Kakashi, which is just such a stupid, childish, and selfish thing to be worried about. Can't he see that I need you? Can't he see how worried we all are? I heard him through the bedroom. He was talking to Kurenai in the kitchen. I got out of bed and when he came to try and put me back in bed I slapped him as hard as I could. I don't think I did much damage, but then I just started screaming at him. I was just so angry and worried about everything! I started sobbing, and they put me in bed and Kurenai went to get Kakashi. He asked the other two to leave and he held me until I calmed down. After that, we had a really long talk. I told him what Tenzo said, and how worried I was about you. He just listened. He's a good listener, but I guess you already know that. He stayed with me all afternoon, but I couldn't bring myself to talk about the baby. I just don't think he'd understand, and he's not the one I want here with me anyway. I did something very selfish, Iruka. I asked Kakashi to find you. I know it could just be that you're in between towns, but something in my gut tells me it's more than that. I'm worried you're hurt. Kakashi said he'd take some vacation time and try to track you down. I feel much better now. I hope you aren't angry with me for what I've done.

Losing it,

Tsubaki  
April 21

**(Letter)**

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
__174 Lazy Lane  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki,

I'm sorry it's been so long since I've written. We arrived at Getsugakure, Moon Country, almost two weeks ago. The whole country is just a small island relatively isolated from the rest of the world.

Just our luck, we get here and then they have one of the worst hurricanes in their history. Everything was destroyed. Thankfully, we were in the ninja village. It was slightly better fortified than other areas, but some of the outlying farms and fisheries were just swept away by the water. I can't even describe how horrific the situation is. Jiraiya, Naruto and I are helping as best we can. Moon Country's only ally is Water Country, and their ninjas are preventing any foreigners from either coming in or going out. We're effectively trapped here. They didn't get mail service back up until today. They're saying we might be stuck here for a month. There is only one boat from Water Country taking people off the island, and currently it's just taking the injured. After that, they'll be taking the dead and the people that have the money to pay the outrageous fee. All private boats are being driven away. I don't blame them. The rules are strict, but they're just trying to re-establish control of the area.

Water Country is bringing in food, clean water, and building supplies. Once Getsugakure is stabilized, we might have a chance of getting a ride out. Nothing is certain right now, I'm afraid. I don't want you to worry, though. Getsugakure flooded, but it's not too bad. Naruto, Jiraiya, and myself are all perfectly healthy – just a little wet. I wanted to protect Naruto from all the devastation, but he's been so grown-up, Tsubaki. He runs around the village helping whoever needs it, and he and Jiraiya have built a makeshift boat to search for survivors in the nearby village. It took a much harder hit because they were nearly sea level. All you can see is the roofs of the buildings. There are people clumped together on the roofs, and since the Water Country ninjas are so busy, the civilians in Getsugakure have been trying to help the stranded people out. We're bringing them back by boat a few at a time.

I've been put in charge of taking care of everyone brought to the inn, which is where we were staying before the hurricane hit. I'm trying to keep things orderly. There are lots of children that have lost their parents. My heart goes out to them, and I'm doing everything I can to keep everyone calm and fed. Needless to say, it's a full time job. I haven't forgotten about you though, love. I might not make it back in time to welcome Baby into the world, but I know you will tap into that strength inside of you and do a wonderful job delivering him. I have faith in you, and I'm sending you a big hug in this letter.

Stay strong,

Iruka  
May 1

**(Letter—Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

I nearly collapsed with relief when we received your letter. Kakashi brought it here personally. We heard about the hurricane, but no one knew how bad the damage was. When we heard the news, Kakashi headed your way instead of going towards Bean Country. When he got to the port, he said it was chaos. People from all over that had loved ones on the island were trying to get to them, but no one was being allowed to go to the island. A Water Country ninja appeared with a sack of letters and called out names and then gave the rest to a mail carrier to deliver. Kakashi brought your letter home as fast as he could. He read it before he brought it to us, but I couldn't blame him. I would have, too.

All I can say is how relieved I am that you're safe. Suddenly giving birth doesn't sound quite so bad in light of your situation. If you can be strong there, I can be strong here. It will be any day now, but now that I know you're safe, I'm fine. I'll make you proud and when you do finally get home, you'll have a gorgeous baby to greet you.

Love,

Tsubaki  
May 3

**(Sasuke's Journal Entry)**

Dear Journal,

Naruto needs to come home now. That stupid teacher of his took him into a hurricane. I wasn't too worried at first, but I was staying with Tsubaki to take care of her and she was so upset that it got to me. The past few days just kind of blurred together. Tsubaki and I were waiting, constantly, for word from Kakashi. Tenzo hasn't been around since Tsubaki told him off. He deserved it. I'm not speaking to him either. Naruto's trained enough. He and Iruka need to come home.

Sasuke  
May 3

**(Letter—Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

Tanaka Hotaru was born yesterday!!!! You read right – baby is a girl! So much for maternal instincts, hmm? Oh, Iruka, she's the most beautiful baby I've ever seen! I had a boy name picked out, but then we were all so surprised…I can't even find words! It was like…like…I've always pretended to be strong, but every time that my strength has been tested in the past I always fell apart or needed help from someone else. When I was giving birth, I knew that there was no one that could do it except me. I found that inner strength you told me about, and I was invincible. When they put her into my arms, I felt like I could take on the world. There was this little, precious person in my arms that was so perfect, and that needed me as her protector. The loneliness was gone. I just felt like there was this brilliant explosion of light inside my heart. So I named her Hotaru – my own little firefly, my beautiful light. I could go on and on, but the whole experience seems like it's just beyond words. I'm certain that when you hold her for the first time, you'll understand just how amazing she is. I'm exhausted and she's constantly hungry, but nothing can tear me down. I feel like a mountain of strength.

Love,

Tsubaki  
May 19

**(Letter)**

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
__174 Lazy Lane  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki,

It's my birthday today, and we're getting off the island. It's hard to leave, because I've gone through something amazing with these people that's melded our hearts, but I'm constantly thinking of you. For all I know, the baby could have been born already! Jiraiya says we can come home now. Naruto and I are both so relieved and happy that nothing can touch us. We're both beyond ready to finish traveling. Naruto is still disappointed about not mastering the Rasengan, but when I tried to talk to him about it, all he said was that it doesn't really matter to him what he learns as long as he can be strong for people who can't be strong for themselves. Can you believe that? Sometimes he just amazes me.

He's learned a lot this year, and in this past month especially. When this all happened, I was worried he would see too much. Instead of being upset and complaining, he made every younger kid in the inn feel like he was looking out for them and protecting them. He's growing up, and I'm very proud of him.

Everything is hectic here, so I'm going to have to cut this short. I hope everything is well in Konoha. If you're still pregnant, hang in there!

Love,

Iruka  
May 26

**(Letter)**

_Uchiha Sasuke  
__Uchiha Complex  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Sasuke,

I'm coming home!!!!

Naruto  
May 26

**(Letter—Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

The Hokage has died. The villagers are being told it was an assassination. He struggled, but he was elderly and it's rumored the assassin was one of his former pupils. Everyone is so saddened, and the village is on high alert for further attack. Temporarily the counsel has taken over. We aren't sure who will be the next Hokage. Kakashi and Tenzo are working pretty much around the clock, and even Sasuke has been given duties to do, despite still being an academy student.

I'm upset about the Hokage, but I didn't really know him. Kakashi and Tenzo are taking the news much harder. Hotaru is doing a fine job of keeping everyone smiling during breaks, though. I didn't realize how aware of everything she would be. If I open my eyes wide, she opens her eyes wide, too. I know it's not a big deal to you, because you've seen what's under Kakashi's mask, but now the rest of us have, too, thanks to Hotaru. The first time he held Hotaru, he was so nervous about dropping her that when she pulled on his mask he was too frightened of letting go of her to pull it back up. It was only Sasuke and myself that saw, but it was funny all the same. Are you sure you want to give him up to Tenzo? You didn't tell me how gorgeous he is under that fabric!

I'm so glad you're coming home. Taking care of Hotaru is difficult on my own. I have to tend to my gardens, or else we won't have any income, but she doesn't like being put down. She wants someone to hold her constantly. I love her to pieces, but my arms are getting tired!

Love,

Tsubaki  
June 5

**(Letter)**

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
__174 Lazy Lane  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki,

There's been a change in plans. Jiraiya was sent word about the death of the Hokage. The counsel has asked him to take the position, but he tells me his friend, Tsunade, would be much better for the task. No doubt he's just too lazy and too addicted to writing porn. At any rate, we've agreed to travel with him to find Tsunade and persuade her to return with us. It's shouldn't cause too much of a delay. Jiraiya asked around and thinks she's in Rice Field Country. It's a dangerous area, and I feel nervous about going. Jiraiya told me that it's probably where the Hokage's assassin is from.

On the other hand, if we can just find this woman, we'll be done. We can come home. That's the only thing keeping me going. And, of course, the knowledge that you must have had your baby by now. I want to see him and give him lots of kisses. I bet he's very handsome. I'll need something to distract me from seeing Kakashi with someone else. I tell myself that I'm over him, but I dream about him at night. When I was with Takuma, I was picturing Kakashi. I don't know how I fell for him without realizing it. It's almost funny, because he told me once that he could make me love him. I nearly laughed at him. Now the joke isn't so funny anymore.

I don't know if it's really love, or if it's just been so long that I can't remember what he's really like. It's becoming harder and harder to remember what I didn't like about him. I did this with Mizuki, too. They say time heals all wounds, but sometimes I wish my heart wasn't so forgiving. I don't want to get hurt again. I guess it won't even be an issue. He's probably head over heels for this new guy anyway. No doubt he's younger, stronger, and more attractive than I am. No kids, I bet, and he probably appreciates all the romantic things Kakashi does. Sometimes I feel like such an idiot.

Love,

Iruka  
June 10

**(Letter)**

_Hatake Kakashi  
__Apartment #36  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Kakashi,

I was sorry to hear about the Hokage's death. I know you must have been close to him, seeing as he was your boss. I hope you're not working too hard, and that you're taking care of yourself. Tsubaki must have had her baby by now. You're so lucky to get to see him when I can't! Is he cute?

I'm sorry I haven't written you very often. I know you've moved on, and I don't want my letters to cause any trouble. Kakashi…do you love him? I bet he's a really wonderful guy. I hope I get to meet him. I'm glad you've found someone that appreciates you. What I'm trying to say…and it's coming out all wrong…is that I'm sorry. You did a lot of wonderful things for me, both as a lover and as a friend, and now that I've thought about things for a long time, I can see that I didn't always treat you like I should have. I expected you to be perfect, and that's an unfair expectation to put on anyone. I guess I was just so stressed and hurt at the time that little things that really shouldn't have bothered me did. So I'm sorry. I wish I could do this in person, but I have a feeling that when I see you, if I don't pretend that I'm meeting you for the first time, I'll do something I'll regret in front of your new boyfriend. Please don't be hurt if I can't…if I have to put some distance between us. You probably have a really good thing going for yourself, and I don't want to ruin that. Does that make sense? It probably doesn't. As usual, I try writing you a casual letter and I end up with this. I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't send this, but I'm going to anyway. You deserve more than a few, emotionless sentences about Naruto's training.

Iruka  
June 10

**(Letter)**

_Uchiha Sasuke  
__Uchiha Complex  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Sasuke,

I thought we were coming home, but now we have to go get the next Hokage. I don't see why they can't send someone else. I really want to see you again. Are you going to graduate soon? You can't graduate until I get there, okay? We have to be on a team together, remember? We promised.

Naruto  
June 11

**(Sasuke's Journal Entry)**

Dear Journal,

The Hokage died, and I have to do a lot of work around the village. The counsel tightened security to the point that I hardly see Kakashi or Tenzo anymore. I talked to Tenzo about Iruka. He asked me how I would feel if Naruto found a new best friend and brought him home with him. When he put it like that, I guess I can see why he doesn't want Iruka to come back. He doesn't know him like the rest of us do. Kakashi cares about Tenzo. I can tell. I caught them fighting the other day, but they didn't know I was watching. Tenzo was mad about something Kakashi had done, and then Kakashi asked Tenzo if he cared about what other people think about them. Tenzo said no one would do anything to Kakashi, but that he didn't have rank or experience to protect him.

I don't entirely know what's going on, but I think it has something to do with what happened a few weeks ago. We were at the ramen stand, and Kakashi said something girly to Tenzo. Some strangers were eavesdropping and shot them weird looks, and Tenzo told Kakashi to quit joking around. I could tell it hurt Kakashi's feelings. Why do people in this village have to be so stupid? Just because Kakashi and Tenzo are both guys – why does it matter? If I had a chance with Naruto, I wouldn't care what everyone else said. I would never treat Naruto the way Tenzo treats Kakashi. I still think Iruka would be better for him, but it's Kakashi's life, I guess.

Sasuke  
June 15

**(Letter)**

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
__174 Lazy Lane  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki,

What a mess! We finally found Tsunade, but some creep named Orochimaru got here first. I guess I need to go further back than that. Alright, so apparently the Hokage had three students – Tsunade, Jiraiya, and Orochimaru. According to Jiraiya, Orochimaru was the Hokage's favorite, and he wanted Orochimaru to take his position one day. All three students grew up with legendary powers. Tsunade became a healer, Jiraiya became a wandering author, and Orochimaru ended up as a mass murderer. He's held a grudge against Konoha – I don't know why – and Jiraiya suspected that he was the one who killed the Hokage. He's got some bigger plan, but Jiraiya doesn't know what it is.

During his battle with the Hokage, Orochimaru hurt his arms. The only person talented enough to heal him is Tsunade. He hunted her down and found her about a week before we made it to Rice Field Country. By the time we got to her, Orochimaru had offered to resurrect her dead boyfriend and little brother if she healed him. Can you believe this? As if that weren't insane enough, the situation became even worse! Naruto lost his temper because she slandered the Hokage position, and he tried to use that technique Jiraiya was teaching him against her. It didn't work, but she made a bet with him; if he mastered the technique in a few days, she'd give him some priceless necklace and take the Hokage position. Who puts that kind of pressure on a ten year old? I tried to help him, but he shut me out. This technique has been frustrating him for a long time, and he thinks I just won't understand since it's a ninja thing. So while Naruto was trying to learn the stupid technique, she drugged Jiraiya so he wouldn't interfere and went off to tell Orochimaru her decision. I found Jiraiya (not for the first time) passed out in this seedy bar with no chance of waking up any time soon. I didn't know what to do, but I knew she couldn't be allowed to heal Orochimaru. He wants to destroy Konoha. So I told the bartender to look after Jiraiya and tell him where we went if he woke up. Naruto and I tracked down Tsunade and we found her already fighting with Orochimaru.

Naruto, Tsunade, and her friend Shizune fought him with everything they had, but then he cut his wrists and Tsunade froze up. Whoever heard of a doctor who's afraid of blood? Thankfully, Jiraiya showed up at the last second and summoned his frog friend. Naruto's attempts to summon him hadn't worked out so well. It turned into this huge battle between Tsunade's giant slug, Jiraiya's toad, and Orochimaru's summoned snake. It was the most bizarre thing I've ever witnessed. In the midst of their battle, I saw a stray attack going Naruto's way, and I reacted on instinct. I jumped in front of it and the next thing I remember is waking up to see Tsunade leaning over me, scolding me for doing something so foolish when Naruto was perfectly capable of dodging the attack safely. Apparently, seeing Orochimaru's attack barbecue me pissed Naruto off enough to perfect his Rasengan and use it to tip the battle in Tsunade's favor. He got the necklace and she's coming back with us. As for me, I'm one gigantic bruise. Tsunade healed the major cuts so I didn't bleed to death, but I'm still covered in smaller ones. I broke my left arm, shattered my leg, and fractured four ribs. Tsunade's suffering from chakra exhaustion, and that drug did something strange to Jiraiya. He's having trouble keeping food down. The medics think it's an allergic reaction of some kind. At any rate, all of us are stuck in the hospital except Naruto and Shizune. The last I saw of Naruto, he was trying to find out how much ramen he could buy if he sells the necklace Tsunade gave him. Tsunade is trying to make a speedy recovery so that she can skin him alive for even thinking about it.

In pain,

Iruka  
July 6

**(Letter—Unsent)**

Dear Iruka,

I'm so sorry. That's quite a story, though! I hope your entire trip hasn't been that exciting all the time. I wish I could come see you in the hospital, since it's only a few days of travel, but Kakashi says you're still in enemy territory and you're probably only getting treatment because the ninjas are too afraid to deny it to Tsunade and Jiraiya. Now I'm worried they might try something underhanded. Kakashi's worried, too, I can see it written all over his masked face. I think he would have come see you, but Tenzo would have pitched a fit about it. They're back together, but I almost don't pay attention anymore, because they're only going to break up again in a few days. Those men drive me crazy.

Sasuke would have graduated this week, but because of the death of the Hokage, the final exams have been postponed until August. He's excited. He hopes it means Naruto will be able to test with him. He wants Naruto to come home so badly. Sasuke isn't a big talker, but he mentions Naruto at least once a day. Now that the security fright is over, I'm seeing Kakashi and Tenzo more and Sasuke's helping me with my garden again. I think it helps calm him down. He's good with the plants, and he shows a real interest in it when Tenzo and Kakashi aren't around to make fun of him. Recover quickly and come home. Hotaru is getting big, and I'm worried she'll be all grown up before you even get here!

Love,

Tsubaki and Hotaru  
July 10

**(Letter)**

_Tanaka Tsubaki  
__174 Lazy Lane  
__Konoha, Fire Country_

Dear Tsubaki,

This will be my last letter to you. We've all healed up (with only a few new scars to show for our battle) and our group is moving towards Konoha. We should be there in a few days. I have a feeling Konoha won't know what to think of their new Hokage. She's tough as steel, and certainly smart, but she's the unluckiest woman I've ever met. We played quite a few games of poker in the hospital, and I won every game. I never win at poker. Even Naruto beats me, and half the time he doesn't even know what the cards mean.

Tsunade has a pet pig that she dresses up and totes around with her. Naruto loves playing with her, and all I've heard about lately is how much he wants his own pet. Now that I can afford one, I'm inclined to indulge him. He can't make up his mind about what he wants, though. He's telling Shizune he's going to get an alligator, and rather than cause a fight about it, I'm just waiting for him to change his mind. It won't take long.

I'm so excited to see your baby, and to see you. How much have you changed this past year? I feel like a different person. I've seen so much and met so many new people. I read my diary and a part of me can't believe that I've seen so much of the world. Not even three years ago I was worrying about putting food on the table. Now I'm traveling the world with famous ninjas and planning to write a book. It almost feels like a fairy tale. I never thought I would make it to this place. I never thought I'd be able to give my son a good life. I'm so grateful for everything, for the good friends I've found, like you and Jiraiya, for meeting Sasuke and seeing Naruto grow so much. I think I can finally visit my parents graves and know that they'd be proud of who I've become.

Love,

Iruka  
July 17

P.S. Tell Sasuke we should be home in time for his birthday, and that we're bringing him a surprise. Tell him I love him, too, and I can't wait to see him!

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**A/N:** So, there you have it. A year's worth of letters that bridge the gap between "Fighting Dreamers" and the sequel, "New Promises." Look for "New Promises" to be posted soon. To everyone who reviewed "Fighting Dreamers," I send you a huge thank you and some Kakashi Cookies.


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